Disclaimer: I don't own them, never did. The cherries are mine! Mine!
A/N: Welcome to another round of Scott verses the Cherry or Jubilee's Mad Rampage. I'm still figuring out who will cause the most damage. Hope you like this and reviews are ambrosia to the writer!!
Got Candy?
Chapter 2
-in-
"That is the most amazing thing."
"Yeah."
"In goes sugar."
"Yep."
"Out comes cottony goodness. Pink cottony goodness."
"Or blue fluffy happiness." Angelo added for good measure.
Jubilee managed to drag her eyes away from the rather frazzled shop attendant who was beginning to wish that she hadn't come in to work that day. Actually she had started thinking that about twenty minutes after Jubilee entered the store. After three solid hours she was thinking of ways to creatively torture her boss had been sick with the flu. Supposedly. "Makes you believe in magic doesn't it?" the woman asked dryly.
"Yes. Yes it does." Jubilee nodded fervently. Her attention returned to the boxes that were being loaded up onto the cart. Not wanting to be selfish in any fashion, Jubilee had kindly left a pound of candy in each of the different bins for other children in the area. Not being stupid, she had loaded the rest of the candy onto a moving van the candy store had provided.
Now, legend has been made of Jubilee's tolerance for sugar. Horror stories have been told of the night she consumed three, one-pound bags of Skittles, a bottle of Surge, several expressos and a box of Sugar Bomb cereal. Rumors have it that Emma had to repair the entire third floor of the girls' dorm. It's also been said that even Sabretooth fears a sugared up Jubilation Lee. It's all true.
At that point and time, Jubilee's energy levels were sky-high and she was moving around the room in a curious jump, hop bouncing step that made her look like she was Tigger on crack. Sparks fizzed around her fingertips and as she bent to peer at a new kind of jawbreaker, a case shattered as a stray burst of plasma shot off her hand. "Oops!" She blinked innocently and then broke into peals of laughter. Her face grew red as she giggled hysterically, unable to control the sparks around her hands that were starting to fly off at odd moments, which then proceeded to fry every electronic system in the western section of the mall.
The lights flickered out, leaving them in the glow of multicolored sparks still shimmering around Jubilee.
"Chica, I think we better go now."
Jubilee grinned, seemingly unaware of the change in the lack of light. "Yes. We must go share the candy with our friends."
Angelo looked at her in interest as he pried the cotton candy machine from the shop clerk. "Who is that exactly?"
"The X-men. Paige mocked my cereal this morning so she doesn't get any candy. Jono would just get sad. And I just don't like M." Jubilee patted his cheek reassuringly. "But you're my bestest friend ever. Aside from Wolvie. And Ev. But you're cuter than any of them. You have the nicest ass." Jubilee whispered confidentially, her voice echoing across the mall as she pinched the other said cheek.
"Really?" Angelo looked interested for a moment before he returned to his possessive hold on the cotton candy machine which he was dragging out the door, inch by inch. "Do I have to give her up?"
"As long as she's not in the bedroom I don't care."
-in-
"This is embarrassing." Sabretooth mumbled to Mystique as he half-heartedly trashed a car. "I mean, I can understand the reckless abandonment for lives in order to take over the world but this is just stupid. Asking for the X-men to battle us?"
"It's a part of Magneto's plan. We have to support him." Mystique replied, somewhat less than thrilled to be picking a fight exactly a half an hour before the Friends' season premiere. "Plus he's our leader."
"He was also talking to a bird less than three hours ago. Insanity is fine and dandy until it gets our asses kicked." the large mutant smashed a store window for the newscasters hovering above the area who eagerly televised the terrified people running screaming from the building.
"Halt villains!"
Magneto looked up triumphantly as Scott, Jean, Hank and Bobby arrived on the scene. "At last, we will have the final battle between good and evil."
Everyone halted in their tracks and stared at the man with the sole exception of Scott who looked positively thrilled at the idea. "Magneto, you will never triumph while we live to withstand you and your brotherhood of mutants. We fight for truth and justice and the American way." Scott took a shuddering breath and blinked back tears. "Come my teammates, we will undo this evil genius's plan!"
"Oh brother." Hank rolled his eyes and even Jean's cheeks were red as they listened to their teamleader's fervor.
Magneto paused mid-mayhem. "You think I'm a genius?"
"Well of course." Scott nodded reassuringly. "It takes a real evil genius to try and take over the world again and again."
"I woulda called it stupidity." Sabretooth muttered under his breath, causing Hank to stifle a laugh.
Sounding mildly pleased at Scott's comment and totally ignoring the other, Magneto finished tossing the car onto a lightpole. "Thank you."
"Your welcome." Scott smiled politely as he shot an optic beam at Magneto, sending him into the wall behind him.
Sighing, Bobby shrugged and started pelting icicles at Sabretooth. Hank, much in the same vein as Bobby, launched himself at Mystique.
It was several moments later, after half of the city block had been destroyed that Scott began to feel slightly unwell. His stomach gurgled uncertainly and two seconds later, an excruciating pain began to course through his abdomen. "Ow."
Jean ran over to him. "Are you okay?"
A loud rumble sounded and Scott looked up worried. "Um, I don't think so."
Hank paused in the middle of giving Mystique a noogie, a smirk on his face. "I warned you about the perils of eating so many cherries."
"Oh my." Scott doubled over in pain and began to look frantically for a bathroom.
"Oh ew." Bobby grimaced.
"Magneto, can we take a time out? I need to use the bathroom..." Scott didn't finish his sentence as he sprinted to the aforementioned Port-a-Potty.
"I did marry a three-year old." Jean muttered, shaking her head.
All the while the news cameras were recording the fight. At the mansion Xavier watched in disbelief as the cameras zoomed in on Scott running to the blue cubicle while the others paused in the fight. Logan and Sarah however roared in laughter, surreptitiously putting in a blank tape in the vcr.
Xavier groaned as he listened to the commentary accompanying the scene.
"We are bringing you live footage from downtown Salem where it seems as if the leader of the X-men, known as Cyclops paused mid-fight to take a potty break. Sources confirm that Cyclops is indeed in the bathroom while his teammates wait for him to finish up so they can continue to fight...."
"That is hysterical!" Jubilee squealed appearing in the doorway hefting several bags of candy. She frowned thoughtfully. "Actually everything is really funny right now. Cause..um... we were listening to that show with the guy and he was really really funny but usually he isn't because he just isn't funny but today he kept on saying the greatest stuff like how um things today are so much more worse then when he was a kid because he had..." Jubilee paused for dramatic effect. "tin can shoes!!!!" The girl promptly dissolved into helpless laughter.
Everyone ducked as sparks began to fly off at various angles. To make a very long story short, with a half an hour the mansion was a smoldering mass of rubble and Jubilee had run off to help Scott, Bobby, Hank and Jean. Authorities found Angelo much later, still clutching a melted heap of metal while muttering "I do believe in magic. I do!"
-in-
A/N: Okay..now I'm scared because this is becoming a lot longer then I ever imagined. More is coming. For those who mentioned it….yes, my humor is very weird. Personally I blame my sister. As for the challenge it was that I had to include the following items; a cherry tree, cherries, someone having to go to the bathroom really really bad, Emma, Scott and a newscaster. Did I mention my sister was twisted? :)