Easter dinner was a week later. It was a sunny day, with no hint of the fog and rain that had come upon them earlier. Una watched everyone with hungry eyes. They all had their lives, loves, and little everyday happenings, while all she had was a boring past and an unseeable future. Not that life had treated her poorly; rather, Una found herself blessed with the loving family she had. But something inside of her wanted something more; what that something more was, she couldn't have told anyone, even herself.
Una had volunteered to help Susan serve, which gave her an unfortunate opportunity to observe her family. All the adults were seated at the long table, while the children were ensconced in the parlour. Anne sat at the foot of the table, with Gilbert at the head. His hair had gone grey over the years, and his hands weren't completely steady as he carved the meat, but Dr. Blythe was still the best physician in Glen St. Mary's, over-harbour, and the Harbour Head.
A close second to him as a doctor, seated at his right hand, was his son, Jem, Young Dr. Blythe. Jem was a born surgeon, with his long, tapering fingers. Faith sat next to him, the look of a completely happy woman on her face even in the midst of bereavement. Walter, Matt, and Meredith were enjoying this chance to see all of their cousins, especially because they were the only set of clan youngsters in the Glen. Una looked at Faith, her thoughts torn between envy of Faith and horror at herself for thinking such a thought. Faith had lost a father just as she had, but Una thought that it might make a difference to have "someone"—she couldn't even use the term "husband" without blushing, to comfort you.
Nan was to Faith's right, with Jerry beside her. Nan, thought Una, although a worthy woman whose children would certainly rise up and call her blessed, wasn't quite of the race that knew Joseph. She was more Martha than Mary, always making sure that everything was just right. There was a hint of merriment in Una's eyes as she poured Jerry another glass of water—no one had ever thought of him as a minister before the War. But he had come back with a true desire to teach others about God, and his experiences in the War had given him an understanding of suffering that let him truly relate to his congregation. Their oldest child was nine-year-old Dianne, who was her mother in miniature, lacking, however, the fancies that her mother had loved as a child. That trait showed up in Blythe, a pixie of seven years with a turned up nose, freckles, and brown braids. John, the youngest at six, was a placid youngster…Una couldn't think of any distinguishing characteristics he had. Although they weren't her favorite nieces and nephew, Una loved them fiercely, for after all, the children of the barren were more than the children of the married; she had all the clan's children to love.
Ken and Rilla sat across from Jem and Faith. They were still so much in love with each other it made Una's heart hurt to watch them, their fond looks and hand squeezes that said, "I love you". It really was amusing, thought Una, that Rilla, the one who had always abhorred babies, should have the largest family in the clan. Running down like stair steps were Gilbert, age eleven; Gertrude, or Trudy, age nine; seven-year-old Willis; Cornelia Susan at five; and a little plump-cheeked darling, three-year-old Owen. Una figured that Rilla Ford was the only person who had ever suspected her love for Walter Blythe, but Rilla had entirely too much discretion to ever mention it.
Carl and Persis Meredith sat next to Ken and Rilla. They lived in Toronto, but traveled all over the world so Carl could collect his "slimy bugs", as his daughter Cecilia called them. Carl was a good-natured sort, and Persis was a dear—a bit proud at times, but a dear. "And with looks like that," thought Una, "I might be tempted to be a bit prideful as well!"
Rosemary and Bruce weren't there, as they had gone with Ellen and Norman. "I suppose that all of them should have been here as well," Una continued in her mental conversation with herself, "but for the life of me I'm not sure where we would have put them. They'll be over later, though."
The last of the clan present was Shirley Blythe, quiet as always. Shirley was doing great things in the mathematical world, his fellow faculty members at Redmond said, but in Glen St. Mary eyes, he was the prime example of what happened when you had more education than was good for you. Always rumpled looking, as if he needed to be pressed and brushed, Shirley had never shown any interest in the Glen girls. The War had put an even quieter expression on Shirley's face, as if he'd realized that flying aeroplanes wasn't all he'd hoped it would be. As Una leaned in to collect his plate, he handed it to her, their fingers barely brushing against each other. A strange sensation hovered in Una's mind, compounded by the wisp of expression she saw on Shirley's face. It wasn't a look she'd ever seen on his face before, and she didn't know how to read it. Then, as soon as she thought she'd seen it, it was gone.
****************
"So what are you going to do now, Una?" asked Nan. They were doing up the dishes, with Una washing, Nan drying, and Faith putting away. Rilla was watching the children out in the parlour, while Persis was curled up in the big comfy chair in the kitchen corner.
"I really don't know. Bruce will be teaching, and Rosemary is going to live with Ellen and Norman," Una replied. Why, oh, why, had Nan thought of bringing this up now? She had no idea of what she was going to do, but she didn't want the whole kit and caboodle of them to know that yet.
"Well, you could always have a home with us, I'm sure," Nan told her. "I can't get any good hired girls, and I'd much rather have you, anyway. You're such a good housekeeper."
Seething, Una decided to bite her tongue. She loved Nan and Jerry, but a lifetime with them would be something else altogether. Nan saw this as a practical solution—a home for Una and free, reliable household help. And the children really were somewhat of a handful.
"You know that Ingleside would be available as well, if you didn't want to leave the Glen," Faith said comfortingly, placing the blue and brown mixing bowl on the third shelf. "After all, we've lived here for years. You know everyone."
"Actually, I don't want to make up my mind yet," Una told them. "Thank you both, but I just want to wait a few more days before I consider what I'm going to do."
"And then there's the reading of Father Meredith's will," Persis said. "I'd wait for that before I did anything. Who knows? You might become rich!"
"Somehow, I doubt that," Nan said sarcastically. "A village minister never has enough money to survive on, let alone any to leave to his progeny. I speak from experience!"
"Well, all I know is that I don't know what I'm doing, and I don't have to know yet," Una said softly but firmly, finishing up the last pan. She wiped off the stove with her dishcloth, hung her blue-flowered apron up, and stepped to the door. "I need some time to myself," she told her sister and sister-in-laws. "I think I'll head down to Rainbow Valley and sit a spell."