CHAPTER 3 - WHAT REALLY HAPPENED AT THE BIG OL' WIND MILL
Everyone stood around outside like idiots, watching the elephant burn from the trunks down before their very eyes.
Satine: "Did anyone call the fire department?"
Zidler: "DUH, Satine! It's 1899 - there IS no fire department!"
Leave it to a bunch of stoned men to handle the situation. Christian had another one of his bright ideas. The guys dropped their pants and did the best they could to extinguish the fire with their urine. Unfortunately, the fire was a little too high up. It just ended up falling back down on Satine.
Satine: "Oh, yucky!"
Christian: "Hey, Satine! Your moustache fell off!"
Satine ran off into the Moulin Rouge and cried. Then, something unexpected happened. The giant burning elephant made of straw lifted it's enormous head and let out the loudest elephant call any of them had ever heard.
Then, it lifted one of it's giant straw feet from the ground and once again bellowed out into the night. The elephant looked straight down at the "fire fighters" and scowled, it's eyes turning red.
Christian: "Holy shit! It's gonna kill us all! RUNNNN!"
The giant straw elephant then slammed it's giant hoof into the ground where the "fire fighters" had just run away from, leaving a giant elephant print in the mud. Everyone was screaming, the town was in a panic - everything had turned to chaos.
Meanwhile, Satine was crying miserably in the Moulin Rouge. She sat down by an open window so she could have some fresh air. She poured herself a glass of wine. She had drawn her eyebrows back on, so she was feeling a little better.
Suddenly, she felt a tremor, like an earthquake. She wondered what it could be? She figured the guys had another explosion or something so she took no notice of it. She went to get another drink of her wine and was surprised to see ripples forming in her glass as another tremor was felt, this time much bigger. She stared, transfixed as the ripples got bigger and bigger and . . .
Satine: "AHHH!"
The giant elephant's angry straw eye was glaring at Satine through the window! The giant elephant let out an ear-shattering roar. Then it moved it's nostril to the window to sniff her out.
Giant Straw Elephant: "ACHOO!"
Snot was everywhere, man.
Satine: "Oh gross, how icky!"
Satine didn't waste any time. She ran to the back exit, covered in straw elephant snot. Luckily, Christian was right around back.
Satine: "Christian! Christian! What's going on?"
Christian: "Satine! Oh you won't believe what just happened!"
Christian then paused and twisted his face in disgust.
Christian: "Holy shit! What's that smell?"
Satine: (Embarassed) "Oh . . . um? That's not important! We have to find Zidler and the rest. C'mon!"
They ran around to the front to find everyone running around in a panic. The giant straw elephant was stomping around in the town, crushing buildings and zapping people with his laser eyes.
Satine: "Harold! Where is everybody?"
Zidler: (his line out of sync with his lips) "We can't find the narcoleptic Argentinean!"
Christian: (also out of sync) "Oh no! Did anyone get him out of the elephant?"
The all look up to the giant elephant to see the now awake narcoleptic Argentinean screaming and flailing his arms from the red room.
Satine: (joining in on the Godzilla fun) "WHO WILL SAVE HIM?!"
(Cheesy "Dun, Dun, DUNNN!!!")
TO BE CONTINUED . . . !
DISCLAIMER: I did not create nor do I have ownership of "Moulin Rouge", it's storyline or any of its characters, Jurassic Park or any of it's ideas (like the ripples in the wine or the eye in the window), Godzilla/any of those old horror flicks.
Everyone stood around outside like idiots, watching the elephant burn from the trunks down before their very eyes.
Satine: "Did anyone call the fire department?"
Zidler: "DUH, Satine! It's 1899 - there IS no fire department!"
Leave it to a bunch of stoned men to handle the situation. Christian had another one of his bright ideas. The guys dropped their pants and did the best they could to extinguish the fire with their urine. Unfortunately, the fire was a little too high up. It just ended up falling back down on Satine.
Satine: "Oh, yucky!"
Christian: "Hey, Satine! Your moustache fell off!"
Satine ran off into the Moulin Rouge and cried. Then, something unexpected happened. The giant burning elephant made of straw lifted it's enormous head and let out the loudest elephant call any of them had ever heard.
Then, it lifted one of it's giant straw feet from the ground and once again bellowed out into the night. The elephant looked straight down at the "fire fighters" and scowled, it's eyes turning red.
Christian: "Holy shit! It's gonna kill us all! RUNNNN!"
The giant straw elephant then slammed it's giant hoof into the ground where the "fire fighters" had just run away from, leaving a giant elephant print in the mud. Everyone was screaming, the town was in a panic - everything had turned to chaos.
Meanwhile, Satine was crying miserably in the Moulin Rouge. She sat down by an open window so she could have some fresh air. She poured herself a glass of wine. She had drawn her eyebrows back on, so she was feeling a little better.
Suddenly, she felt a tremor, like an earthquake. She wondered what it could be? She figured the guys had another explosion or something so she took no notice of it. She went to get another drink of her wine and was surprised to see ripples forming in her glass as another tremor was felt, this time much bigger. She stared, transfixed as the ripples got bigger and bigger and . . .
Satine: "AHHH!"
The giant elephant's angry straw eye was glaring at Satine through the window! The giant elephant let out an ear-shattering roar. Then it moved it's nostril to the window to sniff her out.
Giant Straw Elephant: "ACHOO!"
Snot was everywhere, man.
Satine: "Oh gross, how icky!"
Satine didn't waste any time. She ran to the back exit, covered in straw elephant snot. Luckily, Christian was right around back.
Satine: "Christian! Christian! What's going on?"
Christian: "Satine! Oh you won't believe what just happened!"
Christian then paused and twisted his face in disgust.
Christian: "Holy shit! What's that smell?"
Satine: (Embarassed) "Oh . . . um? That's not important! We have to find Zidler and the rest. C'mon!"
They ran around to the front to find everyone running around in a panic. The giant straw elephant was stomping around in the town, crushing buildings and zapping people with his laser eyes.
Satine: "Harold! Where is everybody?"
Zidler: (his line out of sync with his lips) "We can't find the narcoleptic Argentinean!"
Christian: (also out of sync) "Oh no! Did anyone get him out of the elephant?"
The all look up to the giant elephant to see the now awake narcoleptic Argentinean screaming and flailing his arms from the red room.
Satine: (joining in on the Godzilla fun) "WHO WILL SAVE HIM?!"
(Cheesy "Dun, Dun, DUNNN!!!")
TO BE CONTINUED . . . !
DISCLAIMER: I did not create nor do I have ownership of "Moulin Rouge", it's storyline or any of its characters, Jurassic Park or any of it's ideas (like the ripples in the wine or the eye in the window), Godzilla/any of those old horror flicks.