Disclaimer: If I owned them, do you think I would be writing fanfiction?
Honestly!
Rebound - Chapter 7 - Part 1 - Old lovers (That's a really bad title ^_^')
Thanks go to: Rae, Redetia@aol.com, TBA (Tell me about it, when I went on vacation, I nearly died from lack of internet!), Lady Arianna (Forget the movie, I loved Ewan McGregor! Lol), S, Jennifer (That would have been quite amusing...), ChaChaChica (I don't know, maybe Alanna is going through mid- life crisis?), Camp Writer, White-Wolf (You're going to love me after I end up posting the second part of this... Never mind *grins secretively*), Tigerlily and Friends, merky, Tris McGraw, sovereign (I think I read that one too. Although, I thought it was actually a bit humorous. And she doesn't turn into a slut, don't worry.), IrishRose, Crystal Quill, Dewi (try to find the ref in this chapter), Snow*flake (You finally updated your story!!! I'm so happy! *jumps around happily* Wait, my sedative? Oh. I didn't take it yet. What do you mean go take it so I stop acting like a lunatic?? Some people are so rude lol), Chibi-Chingo (don't worry. We all get those looks ^_^), Keita x2, Shy, Jishoshojo (Sorry I haven't emailed you back yet! I'll go do it... soon! Yeah...), Le Fromage, AotS (you aren't a cold hearted bitch. If you were, you would be mean and not have reviewed my story! OH, Jon jumping off a cliff can be arranged...) and ditzy spacecadets (love your name ^_^). Thank you all soooo much!
Raoul had not seen Kel in two days.
She was avoiding him, that was for sure. He had gone to her rooms that very morning to try to talk to her. He had heard her through the door, breathing heavily from her morning exercise routine. However, when he had knocked on the door and told her who it was, no answer had come through. Raoul had waited there for a few minutes, thinking that maybe she had to get dressed or something, but Kel hadn't replied. Sullenly, he had left to go back to his own rooms.
He didn't blame her, of course. Things have been happening so fast lately. He could hardly believe that it had only been three nights since this whole wretched affair had started.
She was sure to be confused. She might still be angry with him for being an ass and making a spectacle in her room. Truthfully, he didn't fault her if she was embarrassed of him. He would be embarrassed if the situations were turned. He was so much older than she was. He had been seducing women since before she was even born, for Mithros sake! Well, perhaps seducing wasn't the most appropriate word to use in this situation...
Raoul sighed and shook his head. 'This has made such a big mess of things. If only I had resisted. If I had resisted, she could have gone back to her rooms. Or maybe even to one of her younger friends'. But not me. I had to let my dick lead me around. I had been wanting something for so long after Buri. The first opportunity I get, and I'm sleeping with my former squire. Good job, Raoul.'
A soft knock interrupted his train of thought. Raoul closed his eyes and waited for the person to go away. He did not want to deal with anyone right now, even Kel.
The knocks became more insistent, raping on his door loudly. Raoul moaned and stood up. There was no way to get out of it, it seemed. Walking toward the entranceway, he unlocked the door and opened it.
"Raoul," his visitor said with a tight smile. "Can I come in?"
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
Neal had not seen Kel in two days.
After he had walked out on her, he had returned to his rooms to think. Kel was confused. He had no right to take advantage of her confusion and vulnerability. He was her best friend, and should give her a shoulder to cry on, not confuse her more. It wasn't fair to Kel. She was hung up on Raoul, and that was that. If Raoul was fool enough to not see that, that was his own fault. It still gave Neal no right to take advantage.
'She would be happier with him,' Neal thought wistfully. 'He would be able to give her what I could not. He's the one who deserves her, not I.' Neal buried his face in his hands.
'But you love her,' another, more romantic part of his mind said. 'If you love her, shouldn't you be with her? Hold her in your arms as she falls asleep at night? Kiss her in a way no one has kissed her before?' Neal shook his head ad scolded himself.
"No! I can't! She's not mine to have! And besides, I have Yuki..." Neal froze.
Yuki.
She had been gone at the Yamani Islands for three months now. Something about the final preparations for Shinkokami's wedding to Roald. Come to think of it, their wedding was only in a few short weeks. Yuki would be coming back soon, and what would she find? Her sweetheart would be in love with her best friend. Neal didn't want her to have to serve as maid of honor at Shinko's wedding when she was heart broken herself. He cared for her, and although he didn't love her, he didn't want to see her hurt, either.
'Maybe if she had been here, things could have been different. I wouldn't have been left alone to my own devices. I wouldn't have fallen so deeply for Kel. I would have had someone else to worry about Kel with.'
'Then again, I can go around blaming my attraction for Kel on her for it all my life. It's not her fault she had to go with Shinko back to the islands. It was her duty. And duty must be fulfilled.'
"What have I gotten myself into?"
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
"Buri," Raoul said emotionlessly. At second thought, he frowned. What was she doing here? He hadn't talked to her since they had that nasty break up scene a few months ago. After that, they had only passed by casually in the halls, simply nodding to each other in greeting, as opposed to talking. They had never talked directly to each other in the King's meetings, and their contact was limited. Why was she here now, after all this time? "Um, yeah, sure you can come in." He opened the door for her and she stepped in. Raoul closed the door and gestured for her to sit down on a nearby chair. "So what can I do for you?"
Buri frowned as she sat down. She pursed her lips together and sighed. "Look, Raoul, I know we haven't talked in a while, and that-"
"Get to the point, Buri. You never were the one to beat around the bush," Raoul cut her off. Buri looked at him almost angrily for a second, but shrugged.
"You know me so well," she said as she continued. "Well, I had, erm, been hearing things lately." Raoul raised an eyebrow quizzically.
"What kind of things?" he asked, not exactly liking the way things were going.
"Just things. About you. And Kel. Just gossip, really, but I-"
"What about Kel and me?" Raoul asked angrily. She folded her arms around her chest and winced.
"Well, just things. Like that you two were lovers. Now, I know that it's not true, but-"
"It is," Raoul cut her off abruptly. Buri looked up in shock. Her mouth fell open as she let out a ragged breath. Swallowing, she formulated her response.
"You. You and Kel are-" she paused "-lovers? But... but you two... I don't understand, Raoul!" Raoul let out a deep breath.
"I don't exactly know if we still are. We had a fight." He sighed and sat down next to her on an opposite chair.
Buri could not seem to find a suitable response to all this. Raoul and Kel? She would have never thought that she would have lost him to her. They were both so different! Well, come to think of it, they weren't so different, but he still was around twenty years older than her! Buri stumbled over her words as she tried to say something.
"What-what was the fight about?" was the only thing she could say at the moment.
Raoul raised an eyebrow and frowned. "She was embarrassed of me. Or rather, she couldn't say if she was or she wasn't. We had words. I haven't heard from her in two days."
"Huh," was all Buri could think to say. A prolonged silence ensued, as the two sat there uncomfortably. Buri broke the hush that had befallen them. "Well, have you tried talking to her?"
Raoul looked away. "I wrote her a letter of apology. That was right after the fight. Like I said, it's been two days. I think I know what she's trying to convey."
"But Raoul-" Buri said as she got up. Raoul held out a hand for her to be silent.
"Don't start with me, Buriram. I don't feel up to our verbal sparring today." Buri sat back down, feeling dejected. Raoul never called her Buriram unless he was truly angry with her. She didn't know why he was that angry with her now, though. She hadn't done anything so far.
'So far,' Buri said to herself. 'I also only just got here. There's plenty more time to make up for it. Why do our conversations constantly end up bad?'
"I'm sorry, Raoul," Buri said remorsefully. Raoul looked up at her and saw that she was hurt at his outburst. He frowned, but said nothing. They sat there in another uncomfortable silence.
"Have you ever just loved somebody so much that it hurt?" Raoul asked her. "That you couldn't think? So much, that when you know in your head that it's over, your heart just won't accept it?" Buri moved to put a hand on his knee.
"I felt that way with you, silly. Doesn't that count for something?" Raoul looked up at her with a strange glint in his eyes. He smiled tightly and took her hand in his.
A knock on the door jolted Raoul out of his mood. Shutting his eyes firmly, Raoul sighed. He stood up reluctantly.
"I have to go to the privy. I won't interrupt you and your guest," Buri said as she too stood up and walked over to where Raoul's bathroom was. Raoul was glad that his guest, whoever that was, wouldn't see the two of them together.
Raoul made his way to the door and answered it.
"Sir Raoul?"
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
Buri stood listening in the bathroom of Raoul's suite. She knew this place well. She and Raoul had never moved in together, but she had stayed here enough nights to know where everything was.
Pulling down her breeches, she began to hear voices from the other side of the door. One of them was Raoul's, the other was a familiar one that she couldn't exactly place. Buri frowned; the voice was male, moderately toned and serious. She still couldn't place him, however-
"Sir Neal, if I'm correct?" Buri heard Raoul say. So that's who it was! She knew she recognized the voice. But what was he doing here?
"Yes. Sir Raoul, I'm here to talk about Kel." Buri could almost see Raoul's frown. So that was what Neal was doing here. Buri vaguely remembered seeing him and Kel together on more than one occasion. He used to be Alanna's squire, if she was not mistaken.
Raoul cleared his throat. Obviously, this was not a conversation he had wanted his ex-lover going to the privy to overhear.
"Well, Neal, why don't we step outside-"
"No." Neal's voice was forceful and commanding. Buri winced. That tone of voice could have convinced the King of Tortall to stay put.
"Or we could just stay in here," Raoul said as Buri heard the door shut.
Buri wished she hadn't have gone to the bathroom at that very moment. The conversation that was going to occur between the two men was probably not meant to be overheard by her ears. So, naturally, she pulled up her breeches and edged closer to the door.
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
"So, Neal, what seems to be bothering you?" Raoul asked in a voice very unlike his own.
"Don't give me that, you know very well what's wrong. I haven't seen Kel in two days. I swear to Mithros, Raoul, this is starting to be a habit of hers!" Neal exclaimed.
Raoul looked away, not meeting Neal's eyes. He didn't know if the younger boy guessed the truth or not, but better he didn't find out from him. Especially not this way.
"Well, Neal, I have heard about that-"
"Don't give me that. Kel told me about you two. I don't need you to bullshit with me right now." Neal said as he cut him off.
Raoul frowned; so Kel had told him. On the one hand, he could be honest with the younger boy. On the other hand, however, whatever conversation they had would be overheard by his ex-lover. All in all, pretty bad circumstances.
"All right. Listen, Neal, I really don't want to have this conversation right now. So if you can maybe come back at a later time-" He was cut off by Neal's growing anger.
"You listen to me, oh Commander of the King's Own, I will not come back at a later time! My best friend is really in a terrible jam right now! She's confused and hurt, and I will not discuss this in a rational manner until you go over there and make things right with her!" Raoul drew back at Neal's reaction. He had seen many angry outbursts in his life, but this one was by far one of the worst. Alanna really had worn off on him.
Raoul heard a faint chuckle come from the room where the privy was kept. Unfortunately, Neal heard it too.
"What was that?" Neal asked suspiciously. Raoul pursed his lips together tightly and looked down at the floor; this was NOT the best circumstance to be caught in the middle of.
"Ah, I'm sure it's nothing-"
"It wasn't nothing, I heard something come from in there!" Raoul edged away from Neal and stood up.
"I'll go-check it out," Raoul said hesitantly. Neal glared at him and stood up as well.
"Well, I'll go with you." Raoul's lips formed a tight, forced smile as his mind raced. What was he going to do? If - When Neal saw Buri in his bathroom, listening to their private conversation, he wasn't going to have the most easygoing reaction about it. There were no other exits from the privy that Buri could get out.
Neal made his way to the privy and opened the door. Raoul grimaced and swallowed hard. Buri was standing in the corner of the room, smiling tightly.
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
"Neal! How are you? I haven't seen you in a while. Is everything all right?" Buri asked as she walked to Neal and gave him a hug. Neal seemed frozen in place. He did not respond when Buri put her arms around him and kissed him on the cheek in a friendly manner. Over Neal's shoulder, Buri gave Raoul an exasperated look.
"So Neal, how is everything?" she asked when she released Neal from her embrace. Neal looked at her suspiciously.
"Commander Buriram, what are you doing here?" he asked, narrowing his eyes skeptically. Buri looked to Raoul desperately and put on a forced smile.
"Well, Neal, I was just delivering some news to my friend Raoul here-" she gestured to Raoul with a wave of her hand "-about the war that was declared against Scanra two days ago." Raoul was quick to agree and nodded vigorously. Neal raised an eyebrow.
"You were reporting to him on Scanra in his bathroom?" he asked doubtfully. Raoul and Buri exchanged looks.
"Well, nature calls, I suppose," Buri answered. She clenched her teeth together and forced herself to have some semblance of a smile.
Neal looked between the two people standing next to him. His gaze rested on Raoul. "So, what, you just decided to let her stay in the bathroom while we were talking about Kel? You wouldn't have done that unless you had something to hide, now would you, Sir Raoul," he said, raising his voice a little.
"Well, ahm, Neal, I, um-"
"So what was the news? Just curious, is all." Neal gave Raoul a look colder than the roof of the world in winter time.
Raoul gave Buri a hopeless look. "Well," Buri began. "Um, King Jonathon, he, uh..."
Neal gave both of them an icy look before he made his way for the door.
"Neal, wait!" Buri yelled as Neal stormed off, but it was muffled by the slam of the door closing in Neal's wake.
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
Neal was furious. Here he was, worried to death about the woman he loved more than life itself, and the person that was supposed to love her almost as much as he was off doing Mithros knows what with his ex-lover. Why didn't they just go and run off together? It would have been easier on Kel. Then at least he could have told her that they were kidnapped by wild centaurs or something. Knowing her, she would have been heartbroken, but at least she wouldn't have been as hurt as he knew she was going to be when she found out.
If she finds out, Neal mentally corrected himself. He certainly wasn't going to be the one to tell her. It would break her heart all over again. He could bring that kind of news to her. Call him a coward, but he would not be the bearer of bad news.
'If Raoul doesn't tell her, though, I'm going to be stuck with the deed. Kel should know if all the hopes she put on Raoul are down the drain because he found someone else to keep him occupied in her period of indecision. Why can't everything be less complicated, like when we were pages?'
Neal stopped walking when he realized that there was someone walking in his direction. Not wanting to be stopped by anyone he knew right then, he ducked into a shadowy niche in the wall and to see who it was.
Neal's throat tightened as Kel walked past him. She was dressed simply in tan breeches and a white, loose, button down shirt. She wore tan boots that clacked lightly against the stone floor of the palace, and her hair was unadorned. She was carrying an envelope with the seal of Mindelan on it. Her pace was fast set, as if she was hurrying somewhere important. Neal froze in indecision. Should he make his presence known? If he did, he didn't know how she would respond. Her reaction could go in his favor or against. 'Best to stay unknown and see where she's going,' Neal thought as he waited until Kel rounded the corner to follow her.
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
"Raoul, I'm so sorry," was the first thing that came from Buri's lips after Neal left. He looked at her sadly and sighed.
"No," he began. "No, it's not your fault. I should have told him you were here. By not doing that, anyone who came in here would have thought we had something to hide. Neal's accusations, however incorrect, will be very head to prove untrue." He frowned and took her hand. "Don't worry yourself about it."
Buri reached up to touch his cheek. "What do you think Neal will do?"
Raoul frowned "Whatever he does, I can't exactly stop him from doing it. It's up to him." Raoul put his big hand over hers and stroked her fingers. She smiled, then withdrew from his hold.
"I missed you. I know that I promised myself that breaking it off would be for the better, but that didn't stop me from missing you." Raoul gave her a small grin as she continued. "I never thought it would be so hard. To be away from someone I fought with almost constantly. I suppose I was wrong on that account." Buri lowered her head and closed her eyes. Raoul looked at her with concerned eyes as he edged closer to her.
"I don't even think we said a proper good-bye. You went off gallivanting with the Riders right after our fight," Raoul said softly.
"Yes. I thought it would have been easier. I was wrong. Nothing could have made it easier," Buri answered.
"No." Raoul paused. "I supposed we should say good-bye then, before this goes any farther."
"Yes. We should say good-bye, shouldn't we?" It was more of a statement than a question. Buri's breath became ragged as she watched Raoul's hands slowly move up to rest right next to her thigh.
"We should," Raoul answered. Raoul's answer came out shakily and unevenly. His Adam's Apple bobbed up and down, as he suddenly found it difficult to swallow.
Buri leaned in and pressed her lips gently to his.
Raoul closed his eyes and returned her kiss.
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
A/N: Woah. Even I didn't expect me to do that. Well, I sorta did, but you know how it works. But I didn't expect it to happen so soon! *grin* This originally had more, but the actual chapter seven was 15 (!) pages long so I decided to split it into two parts. I'm very surprised at myself, actually. At the end of chapter seven (the whole thing) no one is left in emotional turmoil. It's very shocking, especially for myself. ^_^ Anyways, I love you guys. Sorry it took so long to write this, but I was spending a lot of time with it! It takes a long time to write 15 pages! Chapter 8 will probably be the last, and then I'll add an epilogue to finish it off. Maybe. I don't know. Whatever. Whoever actually listens to me in these frivolous little author's notes, you have much more patience than I do. Usually, I just go straight for the little review button on the bottom... *cough hint hint cough* Lol. Anyways, please keep reviewing!
*~Cami~*
P.S. If you caught the Moulin Rouge or Walk to Remember reference, I golf clap you. *gives polite golf clap to everyone that caught references*
Rebound - Chapter 7 - Part 1 - Old lovers (That's a really bad title ^_^')
Thanks go to: Rae, Redetia@aol.com, TBA (Tell me about it, when I went on vacation, I nearly died from lack of internet!), Lady Arianna (Forget the movie, I loved Ewan McGregor! Lol), S, Jennifer (That would have been quite amusing...), ChaChaChica (I don't know, maybe Alanna is going through mid- life crisis?), Camp Writer, White-Wolf (You're going to love me after I end up posting the second part of this... Never mind *grins secretively*), Tigerlily and Friends, merky, Tris McGraw, sovereign (I think I read that one too. Although, I thought it was actually a bit humorous. And she doesn't turn into a slut, don't worry.), IrishRose, Crystal Quill, Dewi (try to find the ref in this chapter), Snow*flake (You finally updated your story!!! I'm so happy! *jumps around happily* Wait, my sedative? Oh. I didn't take it yet. What do you mean go take it so I stop acting like a lunatic?? Some people are so rude lol), Chibi-Chingo (don't worry. We all get those looks ^_^), Keita x2, Shy, Jishoshojo (Sorry I haven't emailed you back yet! I'll go do it... soon! Yeah...), Le Fromage, AotS (you aren't a cold hearted bitch. If you were, you would be mean and not have reviewed my story! OH, Jon jumping off a cliff can be arranged...) and ditzy spacecadets (love your name ^_^). Thank you all soooo much!
Raoul had not seen Kel in two days.
She was avoiding him, that was for sure. He had gone to her rooms that very morning to try to talk to her. He had heard her through the door, breathing heavily from her morning exercise routine. However, when he had knocked on the door and told her who it was, no answer had come through. Raoul had waited there for a few minutes, thinking that maybe she had to get dressed or something, but Kel hadn't replied. Sullenly, he had left to go back to his own rooms.
He didn't blame her, of course. Things have been happening so fast lately. He could hardly believe that it had only been three nights since this whole wretched affair had started.
She was sure to be confused. She might still be angry with him for being an ass and making a spectacle in her room. Truthfully, he didn't fault her if she was embarrassed of him. He would be embarrassed if the situations were turned. He was so much older than she was. He had been seducing women since before she was even born, for Mithros sake! Well, perhaps seducing wasn't the most appropriate word to use in this situation...
Raoul sighed and shook his head. 'This has made such a big mess of things. If only I had resisted. If I had resisted, she could have gone back to her rooms. Or maybe even to one of her younger friends'. But not me. I had to let my dick lead me around. I had been wanting something for so long after Buri. The first opportunity I get, and I'm sleeping with my former squire. Good job, Raoul.'
A soft knock interrupted his train of thought. Raoul closed his eyes and waited for the person to go away. He did not want to deal with anyone right now, even Kel.
The knocks became more insistent, raping on his door loudly. Raoul moaned and stood up. There was no way to get out of it, it seemed. Walking toward the entranceway, he unlocked the door and opened it.
"Raoul," his visitor said with a tight smile. "Can I come in?"
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
Neal had not seen Kel in two days.
After he had walked out on her, he had returned to his rooms to think. Kel was confused. He had no right to take advantage of her confusion and vulnerability. He was her best friend, and should give her a shoulder to cry on, not confuse her more. It wasn't fair to Kel. She was hung up on Raoul, and that was that. If Raoul was fool enough to not see that, that was his own fault. It still gave Neal no right to take advantage.
'She would be happier with him,' Neal thought wistfully. 'He would be able to give her what I could not. He's the one who deserves her, not I.' Neal buried his face in his hands.
'But you love her,' another, more romantic part of his mind said. 'If you love her, shouldn't you be with her? Hold her in your arms as she falls asleep at night? Kiss her in a way no one has kissed her before?' Neal shook his head ad scolded himself.
"No! I can't! She's not mine to have! And besides, I have Yuki..." Neal froze.
Yuki.
She had been gone at the Yamani Islands for three months now. Something about the final preparations for Shinkokami's wedding to Roald. Come to think of it, their wedding was only in a few short weeks. Yuki would be coming back soon, and what would she find? Her sweetheart would be in love with her best friend. Neal didn't want her to have to serve as maid of honor at Shinko's wedding when she was heart broken herself. He cared for her, and although he didn't love her, he didn't want to see her hurt, either.
'Maybe if she had been here, things could have been different. I wouldn't have been left alone to my own devices. I wouldn't have fallen so deeply for Kel. I would have had someone else to worry about Kel with.'
'Then again, I can go around blaming my attraction for Kel on her for it all my life. It's not her fault she had to go with Shinko back to the islands. It was her duty. And duty must be fulfilled.'
"What have I gotten myself into?"
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
"Buri," Raoul said emotionlessly. At second thought, he frowned. What was she doing here? He hadn't talked to her since they had that nasty break up scene a few months ago. After that, they had only passed by casually in the halls, simply nodding to each other in greeting, as opposed to talking. They had never talked directly to each other in the King's meetings, and their contact was limited. Why was she here now, after all this time? "Um, yeah, sure you can come in." He opened the door for her and she stepped in. Raoul closed the door and gestured for her to sit down on a nearby chair. "So what can I do for you?"
Buri frowned as she sat down. She pursed her lips together and sighed. "Look, Raoul, I know we haven't talked in a while, and that-"
"Get to the point, Buri. You never were the one to beat around the bush," Raoul cut her off. Buri looked at him almost angrily for a second, but shrugged.
"You know me so well," she said as she continued. "Well, I had, erm, been hearing things lately." Raoul raised an eyebrow quizzically.
"What kind of things?" he asked, not exactly liking the way things were going.
"Just things. About you. And Kel. Just gossip, really, but I-"
"What about Kel and me?" Raoul asked angrily. She folded her arms around her chest and winced.
"Well, just things. Like that you two were lovers. Now, I know that it's not true, but-"
"It is," Raoul cut her off abruptly. Buri looked up in shock. Her mouth fell open as she let out a ragged breath. Swallowing, she formulated her response.
"You. You and Kel are-" she paused "-lovers? But... but you two... I don't understand, Raoul!" Raoul let out a deep breath.
"I don't exactly know if we still are. We had a fight." He sighed and sat down next to her on an opposite chair.
Buri could not seem to find a suitable response to all this. Raoul and Kel? She would have never thought that she would have lost him to her. They were both so different! Well, come to think of it, they weren't so different, but he still was around twenty years older than her! Buri stumbled over her words as she tried to say something.
"What-what was the fight about?" was the only thing she could say at the moment.
Raoul raised an eyebrow and frowned. "She was embarrassed of me. Or rather, she couldn't say if she was or she wasn't. We had words. I haven't heard from her in two days."
"Huh," was all Buri could think to say. A prolonged silence ensued, as the two sat there uncomfortably. Buri broke the hush that had befallen them. "Well, have you tried talking to her?"
Raoul looked away. "I wrote her a letter of apology. That was right after the fight. Like I said, it's been two days. I think I know what she's trying to convey."
"But Raoul-" Buri said as she got up. Raoul held out a hand for her to be silent.
"Don't start with me, Buriram. I don't feel up to our verbal sparring today." Buri sat back down, feeling dejected. Raoul never called her Buriram unless he was truly angry with her. She didn't know why he was that angry with her now, though. She hadn't done anything so far.
'So far,' Buri said to herself. 'I also only just got here. There's plenty more time to make up for it. Why do our conversations constantly end up bad?'
"I'm sorry, Raoul," Buri said remorsefully. Raoul looked up at her and saw that she was hurt at his outburst. He frowned, but said nothing. They sat there in another uncomfortable silence.
"Have you ever just loved somebody so much that it hurt?" Raoul asked her. "That you couldn't think? So much, that when you know in your head that it's over, your heart just won't accept it?" Buri moved to put a hand on his knee.
"I felt that way with you, silly. Doesn't that count for something?" Raoul looked up at her with a strange glint in his eyes. He smiled tightly and took her hand in his.
A knock on the door jolted Raoul out of his mood. Shutting his eyes firmly, Raoul sighed. He stood up reluctantly.
"I have to go to the privy. I won't interrupt you and your guest," Buri said as she too stood up and walked over to where Raoul's bathroom was. Raoul was glad that his guest, whoever that was, wouldn't see the two of them together.
Raoul made his way to the door and answered it.
"Sir Raoul?"
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
Buri stood listening in the bathroom of Raoul's suite. She knew this place well. She and Raoul had never moved in together, but she had stayed here enough nights to know where everything was.
Pulling down her breeches, she began to hear voices from the other side of the door. One of them was Raoul's, the other was a familiar one that she couldn't exactly place. Buri frowned; the voice was male, moderately toned and serious. She still couldn't place him, however-
"Sir Neal, if I'm correct?" Buri heard Raoul say. So that's who it was! She knew she recognized the voice. But what was he doing here?
"Yes. Sir Raoul, I'm here to talk about Kel." Buri could almost see Raoul's frown. So that was what Neal was doing here. Buri vaguely remembered seeing him and Kel together on more than one occasion. He used to be Alanna's squire, if she was not mistaken.
Raoul cleared his throat. Obviously, this was not a conversation he had wanted his ex-lover going to the privy to overhear.
"Well, Neal, why don't we step outside-"
"No." Neal's voice was forceful and commanding. Buri winced. That tone of voice could have convinced the King of Tortall to stay put.
"Or we could just stay in here," Raoul said as Buri heard the door shut.
Buri wished she hadn't have gone to the bathroom at that very moment. The conversation that was going to occur between the two men was probably not meant to be overheard by her ears. So, naturally, she pulled up her breeches and edged closer to the door.
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
"So, Neal, what seems to be bothering you?" Raoul asked in a voice very unlike his own.
"Don't give me that, you know very well what's wrong. I haven't seen Kel in two days. I swear to Mithros, Raoul, this is starting to be a habit of hers!" Neal exclaimed.
Raoul looked away, not meeting Neal's eyes. He didn't know if the younger boy guessed the truth or not, but better he didn't find out from him. Especially not this way.
"Well, Neal, I have heard about that-"
"Don't give me that. Kel told me about you two. I don't need you to bullshit with me right now." Neal said as he cut him off.
Raoul frowned; so Kel had told him. On the one hand, he could be honest with the younger boy. On the other hand, however, whatever conversation they had would be overheard by his ex-lover. All in all, pretty bad circumstances.
"All right. Listen, Neal, I really don't want to have this conversation right now. So if you can maybe come back at a later time-" He was cut off by Neal's growing anger.
"You listen to me, oh Commander of the King's Own, I will not come back at a later time! My best friend is really in a terrible jam right now! She's confused and hurt, and I will not discuss this in a rational manner until you go over there and make things right with her!" Raoul drew back at Neal's reaction. He had seen many angry outbursts in his life, but this one was by far one of the worst. Alanna really had worn off on him.
Raoul heard a faint chuckle come from the room where the privy was kept. Unfortunately, Neal heard it too.
"What was that?" Neal asked suspiciously. Raoul pursed his lips together tightly and looked down at the floor; this was NOT the best circumstance to be caught in the middle of.
"Ah, I'm sure it's nothing-"
"It wasn't nothing, I heard something come from in there!" Raoul edged away from Neal and stood up.
"I'll go-check it out," Raoul said hesitantly. Neal glared at him and stood up as well.
"Well, I'll go with you." Raoul's lips formed a tight, forced smile as his mind raced. What was he going to do? If - When Neal saw Buri in his bathroom, listening to their private conversation, he wasn't going to have the most easygoing reaction about it. There were no other exits from the privy that Buri could get out.
Neal made his way to the privy and opened the door. Raoul grimaced and swallowed hard. Buri was standing in the corner of the room, smiling tightly.
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
"Neal! How are you? I haven't seen you in a while. Is everything all right?" Buri asked as she walked to Neal and gave him a hug. Neal seemed frozen in place. He did not respond when Buri put her arms around him and kissed him on the cheek in a friendly manner. Over Neal's shoulder, Buri gave Raoul an exasperated look.
"So Neal, how is everything?" she asked when she released Neal from her embrace. Neal looked at her suspiciously.
"Commander Buriram, what are you doing here?" he asked, narrowing his eyes skeptically. Buri looked to Raoul desperately and put on a forced smile.
"Well, Neal, I was just delivering some news to my friend Raoul here-" she gestured to Raoul with a wave of her hand "-about the war that was declared against Scanra two days ago." Raoul was quick to agree and nodded vigorously. Neal raised an eyebrow.
"You were reporting to him on Scanra in his bathroom?" he asked doubtfully. Raoul and Buri exchanged looks.
"Well, nature calls, I suppose," Buri answered. She clenched her teeth together and forced herself to have some semblance of a smile.
Neal looked between the two people standing next to him. His gaze rested on Raoul. "So, what, you just decided to let her stay in the bathroom while we were talking about Kel? You wouldn't have done that unless you had something to hide, now would you, Sir Raoul," he said, raising his voice a little.
"Well, ahm, Neal, I, um-"
"So what was the news? Just curious, is all." Neal gave Raoul a look colder than the roof of the world in winter time.
Raoul gave Buri a hopeless look. "Well," Buri began. "Um, King Jonathon, he, uh..."
Neal gave both of them an icy look before he made his way for the door.
"Neal, wait!" Buri yelled as Neal stormed off, but it was muffled by the slam of the door closing in Neal's wake.
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
Neal was furious. Here he was, worried to death about the woman he loved more than life itself, and the person that was supposed to love her almost as much as he was off doing Mithros knows what with his ex-lover. Why didn't they just go and run off together? It would have been easier on Kel. Then at least he could have told her that they were kidnapped by wild centaurs or something. Knowing her, she would have been heartbroken, but at least she wouldn't have been as hurt as he knew she was going to be when she found out.
If she finds out, Neal mentally corrected himself. He certainly wasn't going to be the one to tell her. It would break her heart all over again. He could bring that kind of news to her. Call him a coward, but he would not be the bearer of bad news.
'If Raoul doesn't tell her, though, I'm going to be stuck with the deed. Kel should know if all the hopes she put on Raoul are down the drain because he found someone else to keep him occupied in her period of indecision. Why can't everything be less complicated, like when we were pages?'
Neal stopped walking when he realized that there was someone walking in his direction. Not wanting to be stopped by anyone he knew right then, he ducked into a shadowy niche in the wall and to see who it was.
Neal's throat tightened as Kel walked past him. She was dressed simply in tan breeches and a white, loose, button down shirt. She wore tan boots that clacked lightly against the stone floor of the palace, and her hair was unadorned. She was carrying an envelope with the seal of Mindelan on it. Her pace was fast set, as if she was hurrying somewhere important. Neal froze in indecision. Should he make his presence known? If he did, he didn't know how she would respond. Her reaction could go in his favor or against. 'Best to stay unknown and see where she's going,' Neal thought as he waited until Kel rounded the corner to follow her.
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
"Raoul, I'm so sorry," was the first thing that came from Buri's lips after Neal left. He looked at her sadly and sighed.
"No," he began. "No, it's not your fault. I should have told him you were here. By not doing that, anyone who came in here would have thought we had something to hide. Neal's accusations, however incorrect, will be very head to prove untrue." He frowned and took her hand. "Don't worry yourself about it."
Buri reached up to touch his cheek. "What do you think Neal will do?"
Raoul frowned "Whatever he does, I can't exactly stop him from doing it. It's up to him." Raoul put his big hand over hers and stroked her fingers. She smiled, then withdrew from his hold.
"I missed you. I know that I promised myself that breaking it off would be for the better, but that didn't stop me from missing you." Raoul gave her a small grin as she continued. "I never thought it would be so hard. To be away from someone I fought with almost constantly. I suppose I was wrong on that account." Buri lowered her head and closed her eyes. Raoul looked at her with concerned eyes as he edged closer to her.
"I don't even think we said a proper good-bye. You went off gallivanting with the Riders right after our fight," Raoul said softly.
"Yes. I thought it would have been easier. I was wrong. Nothing could have made it easier," Buri answered.
"No." Raoul paused. "I supposed we should say good-bye then, before this goes any farther."
"Yes. We should say good-bye, shouldn't we?" It was more of a statement than a question. Buri's breath became ragged as she watched Raoul's hands slowly move up to rest right next to her thigh.
"We should," Raoul answered. Raoul's answer came out shakily and unevenly. His Adam's Apple bobbed up and down, as he suddenly found it difficult to swallow.
Buri leaned in and pressed her lips gently to his.
Raoul closed his eyes and returned her kiss.
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
A/N: Woah. Even I didn't expect me to do that. Well, I sorta did, but you know how it works. But I didn't expect it to happen so soon! *grin* This originally had more, but the actual chapter seven was 15 (!) pages long so I decided to split it into two parts. I'm very surprised at myself, actually. At the end of chapter seven (the whole thing) no one is left in emotional turmoil. It's very shocking, especially for myself. ^_^ Anyways, I love you guys. Sorry it took so long to write this, but I was spending a lot of time with it! It takes a long time to write 15 pages! Chapter 8 will probably be the last, and then I'll add an epilogue to finish it off. Maybe. I don't know. Whatever. Whoever actually listens to me in these frivolous little author's notes, you have much more patience than I do. Usually, I just go straight for the little review button on the bottom... *cough hint hint cough* Lol. Anyways, please keep reviewing!
*~Cami~*
P.S. If you caught the Moulin Rouge or Walk to Remember reference, I golf clap you. *gives polite golf clap to everyone that caught references*