Rufus's Adventure In the Land of Pain
Disclaimer: I don't own FF7 (duh).
Diamond Weapon's final attack cut through the Shin-Ra building's top ten floors. Blazing energy struck Rufus hard. He was in immense pain.
Two months later. . .
Rufus woke up on a beach with flaming red sand. "Ugh! Am I dead or dreaming?" he wondered aloud then looked around. Wait! That wasn't sand he was standing on, he was standing on- "Crabs!" He yelled as the red sea- devils pinched his legs. Hard. He was in immense pain. "EEEEKKK!!!" Rufus screeched like a little girl as he ran as fast as he could to get off of the evil beach. Once he was a good ways off of the beach he pointed at no where specific and exclaimed "Hah! You suck Diamond weapon! I'm still alive!. . ." After he was through mocking Diamond Weapon he set out to find a city.
A few hours later. . .
Rufus found a village. It looked very Chinese. Ooooooh! This looks like a nice village rally support from. He thought. Sadly he missed the sign that said "Now Entering Wutai Stay out Shin-Ra ass holes! Sincerely Yuffie Kisiragi"
Rufus walked up to an elderly woman. "Exscuse me mam, do you know where I might find a podium?" he asked. The lady turned to see his face and ran yelling "Hey, everyone come on out! Rufus Shin-Ra is here!" Off to get the other villagers to hear my speech I guess. Soon the entire village was gathered around him. "Good people of this Chinese lookin' place-" Rufus began completely oblivious to the fact that the entire Wutai was carrying their pitch forks and torches. "Get him!!!" yelled the old lady. The entire village fell upon him with their weapons of Rufus-destruction. He was in immense pain. However, He used his shotgun to pave a path out of the mob. They chased Rufus all the way to one of the bridges near Wutai which collapsed after he crossed it. "Hah! You Suck you weirdos! I'm still ali-" He began making fun of Wutai but one of them threw a torch at him and he was set on fire. He was in, you guessed it, immense pain.
In the course of eight months Rufus Shin-Ra was attacked by 5 cities, 39 sharks, Emerald Weapon and 1 Mog. He was set on fire on 2 occasions and hit by 4 nuclear weapons. He was in immense pain. Finally he made it back to Midgar and met by Scarlet and Heidigger. "Sir, we searched for you for weeks on end but couldn't find you." They said in unison. "I'm here aren't I? Now get the people of the world assembled or something. My trigger finger is itchy" "Yes sir! (insert annoying laugh here: Gya ha ha ha or Kya ha ha ha)." Rufus's ears were in immense pain. "Man, my head hurt less in the Wutai, I'm gettin' outta' here!"
The End
Disclaimer: I don't own FF7 (duh).
Diamond Weapon's final attack cut through the Shin-Ra building's top ten floors. Blazing energy struck Rufus hard. He was in immense pain.
Two months later. . .
Rufus woke up on a beach with flaming red sand. "Ugh! Am I dead or dreaming?" he wondered aloud then looked around. Wait! That wasn't sand he was standing on, he was standing on- "Crabs!" He yelled as the red sea- devils pinched his legs. Hard. He was in immense pain. "EEEEKKK!!!" Rufus screeched like a little girl as he ran as fast as he could to get off of the evil beach. Once he was a good ways off of the beach he pointed at no where specific and exclaimed "Hah! You suck Diamond weapon! I'm still alive!. . ." After he was through mocking Diamond Weapon he set out to find a city.
A few hours later. . .
Rufus found a village. It looked very Chinese. Ooooooh! This looks like a nice village rally support from. He thought. Sadly he missed the sign that said "Now Entering Wutai Stay out Shin-Ra ass holes! Sincerely Yuffie Kisiragi"
Rufus walked up to an elderly woman. "Exscuse me mam, do you know where I might find a podium?" he asked. The lady turned to see his face and ran yelling "Hey, everyone come on out! Rufus Shin-Ra is here!" Off to get the other villagers to hear my speech I guess. Soon the entire village was gathered around him. "Good people of this Chinese lookin' place-" Rufus began completely oblivious to the fact that the entire Wutai was carrying their pitch forks and torches. "Get him!!!" yelled the old lady. The entire village fell upon him with their weapons of Rufus-destruction. He was in immense pain. However, He used his shotgun to pave a path out of the mob. They chased Rufus all the way to one of the bridges near Wutai which collapsed after he crossed it. "Hah! You Suck you weirdos! I'm still ali-" He began making fun of Wutai but one of them threw a torch at him and he was set on fire. He was in, you guessed it, immense pain.
In the course of eight months Rufus Shin-Ra was attacked by 5 cities, 39 sharks, Emerald Weapon and 1 Mog. He was set on fire on 2 occasions and hit by 4 nuclear weapons. He was in immense pain. Finally he made it back to Midgar and met by Scarlet and Heidigger. "Sir, we searched for you for weeks on end but couldn't find you." They said in unison. "I'm here aren't I? Now get the people of the world assembled or something. My trigger finger is itchy" "Yes sir! (insert annoying laugh here: Gya ha ha ha or Kya ha ha ha)." Rufus's ears were in immense pain. "Man, my head hurt less in the Wutai, I'm gettin' outta' here!"
The End