Buffy walked quietly into the living room.
Giles looked up from the book he was reading.
"What are you doing here?" he asked.
"Last time I checked, I live here," she said, sitting next to him on the couch.
"Well, yes, but I told you there's no reason for you to come back."
"Giles, do you really think I would trust Xander not to kill Spike when no one's here to stop him?"
"I suppose not."
"So, how's Dawn doing? Has she driven you crazy yet?"
"Actually, she's been doing quite well."
"What about Willow?"
"She's coping. The coven said we had to be there by tomorrow afternoon."
"What do you think they'll do to her?"
"I'm not quite sure. There are many different actions they could take."
"They wouldn't hurt her, would they?"
"It depends. Killing a human is very extreme. She was more powerful than any witch was ever suppose to be."
"And more dangerous."
"Yes. She endangered everyone she loved and the world. Her actions will be a high price to pay."
"Just as long as she's still Willow when she gets back."
"She'll always be Willow."
They sat in silence for a few minutes.
"I think I'm going to take a quick patrol," Buffy said, standing up.
"That's okay, we've already taken care of it," he assured.
"I still have something I need to do."
He looked up. "Does this involve a certain annoying vampire?"
"Yeah. I need to talk to him."
"That's good that you are taking care of your problems. Very responsible."
"Giles, can I ask you something?"
"Sure, Buffy."
She sat down next to him, again.
"I know you said I should make my own desicions, but can you just give me your opinion on this?"
"Depends on what it is."
"Should I forgive him for what he did?"
He paused to think. Then he started to speak slowly. "No matter what I say, it will always be your decision."
"I know. That's what Angel said."
"Oh really. What did Angel have to say of the matter?"
"He said that if I can forgive Willow for all of her mistakes, I should be able to forgive him for his one mistake, but if I want to get across to him that what he did was wrong, I should give some time before I think of letting him back into my life."
"What do you want to do?"
"At first I wanted to kill him. Even though I know I could never do that. Then Whistler had to come pay a visit."
"Whistler visited you?" Giles interrupted.
"Oh, yeah. Twice. The first time, he said I didn't screw anything up this time. Except for the fact that I was suppose to be dead."
"Oh dear. Why?"
"When I was shot, and Willow came to the hospital to save me, Whistler said she wasn't suppose to do that. The Powers thought she would be just out for revenge and forget everyone else. She wasn't suppose to save me."
"She still had that one speck of humanity in her. That's what saved her."
"And Whistler said that my mom said hi and that things would get better."
"Joyce sent you a message?"
"Yep. She said she has seen my future and it does get better."
"And this does nothing to relax you."
"Nope."
"Well. What did Whistler say the second time?"
"He talked about Spike the whole time."
"Spike?"
"Somehow, the Powers learned that I am going to have a talk with him, and I am, and Whistler came to give me a pep talk."
"What did he tell you?"
"He said that a lot of stuff, but mainly he said he's been through alot too and if I can forgive my friend for trying to kill me and the world, then I should be able to forgive him for his mistake."
"I agree that it was a mistake, but you musn't forget that it was..."
"Rape. I know. Even if it was just attempted, it's still a big and important factor. Still..."
"What is it, Buffy?"
"I feel like he deserves a second chance."
"Everyone deserves a second chance if they think they can make up for their actions. Think of Willow. We have given her multiple second chances. She didn't make it better. So, now, she's having to pay for it dearly."
"But, I want him to pay for doing this to me. I want to get across to him that it was bad and should be unforgivable..."
"But you will give him a chance to make it forgivable."
"Exactly."
"Well, I can't really help you much. I don't have much of a liking for him and I would rather keep it that way. I don't have anything against him, like you do. I could care less what happens to him. But, if I were to say that he was my....allie. I would say that after everything he has done for you and Dawn and everyone, I would say a second chance is deserved."
Buffy thought about it for a second. Then got up from the couch.
"I have to go...talk...to him," she said as she grabbed her coat and headed out the door.
Giles sighed and said to himself, "Spike, you had better not make me regret telling her that."
He went back to his book.
Buffy walked through the cemetary going over everything everyone had told her in her head.
"I'm going to tell him I'll give him a second chance," she said to herself. "And if he screws it up, he's dust. Maybe. I'll just kick his ass. I still can't believe Giles *and* Angel gave me reasons *to* forgive him, instead of saying kill kill."
"Watcher-boy *and* Peaches told you not to kill me," said someone behind her.
She didn't even turn around. "We need to talk."
"Not much to talk about," said Spike, coming up beside her.
"Of course there is."
"Like what?"
"Where'd you go?"
"What if I don't want to tell you?"
"Do you value your duster? Cause it's in my closet and all I have to do is let Xander get a hold of it and it's gone."
"Africa."
"Huh?" she said, turning to face him.
"I said, I went to Africa. Did you grow deaf this summer?"
"Why did you go to Africa?"
He ran a hand through his hair. "You're not going to like it."
"I can deal."
"I went to get this chip out."
(A/N: I wrote this after I read that he went to get a soul, so just go with it.)
Buffy's jaw dropped. She looked surprised, then angry. "So, you try and hurt me, then you decide that wasn't enough and you should get that chip out so you can hurt someone else?"
"I didn't say that."
"Then what are you trying to say?"
"I wanted to show you that you could trust me. That, I could have the chip out and not kill anybody."
"Spike, I already trusted you! Do you think I would have ever let my sister stay with you while Glory was after her if I didn't trust you? Do you think I would have ever let you touch me, if I thought for once second that you might bite me and make me Slayer number three? What is your damage?"
"You told me you didn't trust me."
"I said I didn't trust you to handcuff me to a bed. There's a difference."
"Well, it doesn't matter. This damned chip is still intact, plus, I have a-"
"Soul. I know."
"Who told you?"
"Cordelia."
"Oh."
Then, he started to walk away. She ran to catch up with him.
"Where are you going?" she asked.
"Well, I heard you talking, you said you wanted to talk to me. I figure, if you end up kicking my ass, I would rather already be at my crypt so I don't have to drag myself there."
She sighed, but followed him to his crypt.
He walked through the doorway, the door slamming against the wall. He walked over and perched up on the sarcophogus.
Buffy closed the door quietly and stood a few feet in front of him.
There was silence for a few minutes.
"Sla-..Buffy. I -"
"Don't. I don't want you apologies," she said firmly. "I came because I wanted to tell you....that I forgive you."
He looked up in disbelief. "Why?"
"Well, I thought about it alot. I talked to Angel and Giles. Believe it or not, they said I should give you a second chance, even though they, Angel in particular, wish you were dust right now."
"I'm not surprised. What I am surprised about is that you are giving me a second chance. By that, do you mean.."
"No. I mean...I'll give you another chance to prove that you love me as much as you say you do."
"I already have-"
"Spike, the second you walked out of that bathroom, you were back at square one. Everything you have proved, is gone. Forgotten. It doesn't matter anymore. That's what a second chance is. It's a chance to start over and do it right this time. I am being generous. What you did, was unforgivable. I don't have to forgive you. But I am, because everyone deserves a second chance. Especially you. You helped me protect Dawn, you helped my friends while I was six feet under, you were the first one I talked to when I came back, you were there for me when I needed it. I'm grateful."
He had a surprised look on his face. "Well. I didn't expect that."
"Good. You shouldn't have."
Pause.
"I heard what about what happened," he said. "I'm sorry about Tara."
"Will's a mess. Tara was her everything and now she's gone. Now she has to go to England for trials."
"How are you holding?"
"I'm okay. I went to LA. I just got back tonight."
"I'm guessing the Cheerleader got Peaches out of the water."
"With a little help from me."
"I figured you'd you come. You always run to him when there's trouble. Or, at least you did until I came. Then, I leave, and it's his turn again."
"It's not a matter of who's turn it is. It depends on who'll listen."
"I listened."
"You did. I liked it then. When I talked. You listened. You gave your opinion. And for those few minutes with you I didn't feel so out of place."
"Yeah. Then we had that little sing and dance number happen."
"Then it all changed."
"You got that right."
She looked up at him. "I still care about you. I care what happens to you. But, what we did... It wasn't right. Or, at least, the reason behind it, was wrong."
"How many times have I heard that before," he mumbled.
"Many. Because it's true."
He was silent.
"Listen," she started, "I didn't come here to fight. I didn't come here to rub what you did in your face. I came to tell you that I forgive you and I'm giving you a chance to make it right."
"What is there to make right, Buffy? I can't change what I did. You're never going to forgive me enough to take me back, I know you."
"You obviously don't know me very well." She turned to leave. Then, she stopped. "I'm giving you a second chance to show me that you could be someone that I would truly care about. And if you think you're ever going to get me back with you, you at least have to prove that first."
She walked out of his crypt and closed the door behind her.
He sat there in deep thought, staring at the brick wall. Without warning, his eyes began to blur as salty tears fell down his hollow cheeks. He laid against the hard surface and let his eyes overflow.
Buffy walked away from the crypt feeling confident that she had made her point.
Someone fell into step next to her.
She didn't turn or stop walking. "I told you I could do it alone."
"I just wanted to make sure. I don't trust him."
"It was fine."
"I heard." Pause. "He's crying over you."
Buffy looked up at Angel. "He's what?"
"Crying. I could hear after you left."
"Spike's crying? That's new. I've never seen him cry before."
"I have."
"I'm guessing that now that he has this soul he'll be doing that alot."
"I wouldn't count on it. He's too stubborn to let a soul get in the way of being a pain in the ass."
"He's too stubborn, period, but that's beside the point. I just don't want him all mopy around me. If he's going to be around me, he has to be Spike, not an Angel wannabe."
"Hey!" Angel protested.
"Nothing against you. Spike is just more fun when he's....Spike. Not soulboy."
"You guys seem to have made up just fine," Angel said under his breath.
Buffy stopped walking. "What's that suppose to mean?"
"You go and have a talk with him, now it seems you have forgotten everything he's done, and now he's just ....Well, Spike. You act like you've completly forgotten what he almost did."
"Angel. I will never forget what he did to me. That kind of thing doesn't want to escape my memory very quickly. I went to have a talk with him about what he did, not to make up. Is it my fault that I don't want another person moping around here?!"
"Buffy, I didn't-" "I don't care, okay. This is the reason I didn't want you to come." Buffy started to walk off.
Angel runs to catch up with her. "Buffy, I don't want you to be mad at me. I'm just worried. I've known Spike longer than you have."
Buffy spun around. "You know the big bad evil Spike. You don't the Spike I just got through talking to. This is the first time you've seen him, if you even saw him, since I was in highschool. A lot has changed since then."
"Spike doesn't change. He'll always be Spike."
"And what if I said that about you, Angel? What if I said, you'll always be Angelus, not matter what happens to you, no matter who you fall in love with, no matter what you do for your friends or innocent people, you'll always be Angelus?"
Angel was silent.
"See," said Buffy, "it's no different. Spike has changed alot more than you think. What he did is the first time he has done something bad enough for me to still be pissed off at him, since he got that chip in his head. And he does alot of stupid things."
"I noticed."
"No, Angel. You don't notice. You've been in LA for the past three years. You don't know the slightly inkling about what he's done."
"Then tell me. What has he done that's so fabulous that you would forgive him for almost raping you?"
Buffy stared at Angel in disbelief. "He was totured by a Hell god, so that Glory wouldn't find out that Dawn is the key. He fought with my friends during the summer I was dead. He took care of Dawn. When I came back, he was just about the only one who didn't jump all over me. He talked to me when my friends were too busy worrying about their problems to listen. He was the first one that I told about being pulled from Heaven, and didn't tell the others, even though he could have just to gloat about being right about something going wrong. He could have told my friends that the chip didn't work on me, just to gloat about somthing going wrong. He could have told my friends that I was sleeping with him.."
Angel winced.
"Just to gloat. But he didn't tell them any of those things, because I didn't want them to know. He didn't tell Glory about Dawn, because he cared about how it would effect me. I don't think he even cared that he was being tortured, as long as Dawn and me were okay. When I was dead, my friends didn't tell him that they were bringing me back. He could have just skipped town and never come back, but he didn't. He had made a promise to me that he would protect Dawn until the end of the world. Look around, Angel. The world's still here. Even when I was dead, he kept his promise, even if I wasn't there to see it happen."
Angel was speechless. He just stared at the ground.
"I'm going home, now," she said. "I want you to get in you car and go back to LA with your friends and Cordelia. If you hurt him after I go, I'll hurt you."
Buffy walked off.
Angel watched her disappear from sight. Then, he left the cemetary and started back to LA.
Giles looked up from the book he was reading.
"What are you doing here?" he asked.
"Last time I checked, I live here," she said, sitting next to him on the couch.
"Well, yes, but I told you there's no reason for you to come back."
"Giles, do you really think I would trust Xander not to kill Spike when no one's here to stop him?"
"I suppose not."
"So, how's Dawn doing? Has she driven you crazy yet?"
"Actually, she's been doing quite well."
"What about Willow?"
"She's coping. The coven said we had to be there by tomorrow afternoon."
"What do you think they'll do to her?"
"I'm not quite sure. There are many different actions they could take."
"They wouldn't hurt her, would they?"
"It depends. Killing a human is very extreme. She was more powerful than any witch was ever suppose to be."
"And more dangerous."
"Yes. She endangered everyone she loved and the world. Her actions will be a high price to pay."
"Just as long as she's still Willow when she gets back."
"She'll always be Willow."
They sat in silence for a few minutes.
"I think I'm going to take a quick patrol," Buffy said, standing up.
"That's okay, we've already taken care of it," he assured.
"I still have something I need to do."
He looked up. "Does this involve a certain annoying vampire?"
"Yeah. I need to talk to him."
"That's good that you are taking care of your problems. Very responsible."
"Giles, can I ask you something?"
"Sure, Buffy."
She sat down next to him, again.
"I know you said I should make my own desicions, but can you just give me your opinion on this?"
"Depends on what it is."
"Should I forgive him for what he did?"
He paused to think. Then he started to speak slowly. "No matter what I say, it will always be your decision."
"I know. That's what Angel said."
"Oh really. What did Angel have to say of the matter?"
"He said that if I can forgive Willow for all of her mistakes, I should be able to forgive him for his one mistake, but if I want to get across to him that what he did was wrong, I should give some time before I think of letting him back into my life."
"What do you want to do?"
"At first I wanted to kill him. Even though I know I could never do that. Then Whistler had to come pay a visit."
"Whistler visited you?" Giles interrupted.
"Oh, yeah. Twice. The first time, he said I didn't screw anything up this time. Except for the fact that I was suppose to be dead."
"Oh dear. Why?"
"When I was shot, and Willow came to the hospital to save me, Whistler said she wasn't suppose to do that. The Powers thought she would be just out for revenge and forget everyone else. She wasn't suppose to save me."
"She still had that one speck of humanity in her. That's what saved her."
"And Whistler said that my mom said hi and that things would get better."
"Joyce sent you a message?"
"Yep. She said she has seen my future and it does get better."
"And this does nothing to relax you."
"Nope."
"Well. What did Whistler say the second time?"
"He talked about Spike the whole time."
"Spike?"
"Somehow, the Powers learned that I am going to have a talk with him, and I am, and Whistler came to give me a pep talk."
"What did he tell you?"
"He said that a lot of stuff, but mainly he said he's been through alot too and if I can forgive my friend for trying to kill me and the world, then I should be able to forgive him for his mistake."
"I agree that it was a mistake, but you musn't forget that it was..."
"Rape. I know. Even if it was just attempted, it's still a big and important factor. Still..."
"What is it, Buffy?"
"I feel like he deserves a second chance."
"Everyone deserves a second chance if they think they can make up for their actions. Think of Willow. We have given her multiple second chances. She didn't make it better. So, now, she's having to pay for it dearly."
"But, I want him to pay for doing this to me. I want to get across to him that it was bad and should be unforgivable..."
"But you will give him a chance to make it forgivable."
"Exactly."
"Well, I can't really help you much. I don't have much of a liking for him and I would rather keep it that way. I don't have anything against him, like you do. I could care less what happens to him. But, if I were to say that he was my....allie. I would say that after everything he has done for you and Dawn and everyone, I would say a second chance is deserved."
Buffy thought about it for a second. Then got up from the couch.
"I have to go...talk...to him," she said as she grabbed her coat and headed out the door.
Giles sighed and said to himself, "Spike, you had better not make me regret telling her that."
He went back to his book.
Buffy walked through the cemetary going over everything everyone had told her in her head.
"I'm going to tell him I'll give him a second chance," she said to herself. "And if he screws it up, he's dust. Maybe. I'll just kick his ass. I still can't believe Giles *and* Angel gave me reasons *to* forgive him, instead of saying kill kill."
"Watcher-boy *and* Peaches told you not to kill me," said someone behind her.
She didn't even turn around. "We need to talk."
"Not much to talk about," said Spike, coming up beside her.
"Of course there is."
"Like what?"
"Where'd you go?"
"What if I don't want to tell you?"
"Do you value your duster? Cause it's in my closet and all I have to do is let Xander get a hold of it and it's gone."
"Africa."
"Huh?" she said, turning to face him.
"I said, I went to Africa. Did you grow deaf this summer?"
"Why did you go to Africa?"
He ran a hand through his hair. "You're not going to like it."
"I can deal."
"I went to get this chip out."
(A/N: I wrote this after I read that he went to get a soul, so just go with it.)
Buffy's jaw dropped. She looked surprised, then angry. "So, you try and hurt me, then you decide that wasn't enough and you should get that chip out so you can hurt someone else?"
"I didn't say that."
"Then what are you trying to say?"
"I wanted to show you that you could trust me. That, I could have the chip out and not kill anybody."
"Spike, I already trusted you! Do you think I would have ever let my sister stay with you while Glory was after her if I didn't trust you? Do you think I would have ever let you touch me, if I thought for once second that you might bite me and make me Slayer number three? What is your damage?"
"You told me you didn't trust me."
"I said I didn't trust you to handcuff me to a bed. There's a difference."
"Well, it doesn't matter. This damned chip is still intact, plus, I have a-"
"Soul. I know."
"Who told you?"
"Cordelia."
"Oh."
Then, he started to walk away. She ran to catch up with him.
"Where are you going?" she asked.
"Well, I heard you talking, you said you wanted to talk to me. I figure, if you end up kicking my ass, I would rather already be at my crypt so I don't have to drag myself there."
She sighed, but followed him to his crypt.
He walked through the doorway, the door slamming against the wall. He walked over and perched up on the sarcophogus.
Buffy closed the door quietly and stood a few feet in front of him.
There was silence for a few minutes.
"Sla-..Buffy. I -"
"Don't. I don't want you apologies," she said firmly. "I came because I wanted to tell you....that I forgive you."
He looked up in disbelief. "Why?"
"Well, I thought about it alot. I talked to Angel and Giles. Believe it or not, they said I should give you a second chance, even though they, Angel in particular, wish you were dust right now."
"I'm not surprised. What I am surprised about is that you are giving me a second chance. By that, do you mean.."
"No. I mean...I'll give you another chance to prove that you love me as much as you say you do."
"I already have-"
"Spike, the second you walked out of that bathroom, you were back at square one. Everything you have proved, is gone. Forgotten. It doesn't matter anymore. That's what a second chance is. It's a chance to start over and do it right this time. I am being generous. What you did, was unforgivable. I don't have to forgive you. But I am, because everyone deserves a second chance. Especially you. You helped me protect Dawn, you helped my friends while I was six feet under, you were the first one I talked to when I came back, you were there for me when I needed it. I'm grateful."
He had a surprised look on his face. "Well. I didn't expect that."
"Good. You shouldn't have."
Pause.
"I heard what about what happened," he said. "I'm sorry about Tara."
"Will's a mess. Tara was her everything and now she's gone. Now she has to go to England for trials."
"How are you holding?"
"I'm okay. I went to LA. I just got back tonight."
"I'm guessing the Cheerleader got Peaches out of the water."
"With a little help from me."
"I figured you'd you come. You always run to him when there's trouble. Or, at least you did until I came. Then, I leave, and it's his turn again."
"It's not a matter of who's turn it is. It depends on who'll listen."
"I listened."
"You did. I liked it then. When I talked. You listened. You gave your opinion. And for those few minutes with you I didn't feel so out of place."
"Yeah. Then we had that little sing and dance number happen."
"Then it all changed."
"You got that right."
She looked up at him. "I still care about you. I care what happens to you. But, what we did... It wasn't right. Or, at least, the reason behind it, was wrong."
"How many times have I heard that before," he mumbled.
"Many. Because it's true."
He was silent.
"Listen," she started, "I didn't come here to fight. I didn't come here to rub what you did in your face. I came to tell you that I forgive you and I'm giving you a chance to make it right."
"What is there to make right, Buffy? I can't change what I did. You're never going to forgive me enough to take me back, I know you."
"You obviously don't know me very well." She turned to leave. Then, she stopped. "I'm giving you a second chance to show me that you could be someone that I would truly care about. And if you think you're ever going to get me back with you, you at least have to prove that first."
She walked out of his crypt and closed the door behind her.
He sat there in deep thought, staring at the brick wall. Without warning, his eyes began to blur as salty tears fell down his hollow cheeks. He laid against the hard surface and let his eyes overflow.
Buffy walked away from the crypt feeling confident that she had made her point.
Someone fell into step next to her.
She didn't turn or stop walking. "I told you I could do it alone."
"I just wanted to make sure. I don't trust him."
"It was fine."
"I heard." Pause. "He's crying over you."
Buffy looked up at Angel. "He's what?"
"Crying. I could hear after you left."
"Spike's crying? That's new. I've never seen him cry before."
"I have."
"I'm guessing that now that he has this soul he'll be doing that alot."
"I wouldn't count on it. He's too stubborn to let a soul get in the way of being a pain in the ass."
"He's too stubborn, period, but that's beside the point. I just don't want him all mopy around me. If he's going to be around me, he has to be Spike, not an Angel wannabe."
"Hey!" Angel protested.
"Nothing against you. Spike is just more fun when he's....Spike. Not soulboy."
"You guys seem to have made up just fine," Angel said under his breath.
Buffy stopped walking. "What's that suppose to mean?"
"You go and have a talk with him, now it seems you have forgotten everything he's done, and now he's just ....Well, Spike. You act like you've completly forgotten what he almost did."
"Angel. I will never forget what he did to me. That kind of thing doesn't want to escape my memory very quickly. I went to have a talk with him about what he did, not to make up. Is it my fault that I don't want another person moping around here?!"
"Buffy, I didn't-" "I don't care, okay. This is the reason I didn't want you to come." Buffy started to walk off.
Angel runs to catch up with her. "Buffy, I don't want you to be mad at me. I'm just worried. I've known Spike longer than you have."
Buffy spun around. "You know the big bad evil Spike. You don't the Spike I just got through talking to. This is the first time you've seen him, if you even saw him, since I was in highschool. A lot has changed since then."
"Spike doesn't change. He'll always be Spike."
"And what if I said that about you, Angel? What if I said, you'll always be Angelus, not matter what happens to you, no matter who you fall in love with, no matter what you do for your friends or innocent people, you'll always be Angelus?"
Angel was silent.
"See," said Buffy, "it's no different. Spike has changed alot more than you think. What he did is the first time he has done something bad enough for me to still be pissed off at him, since he got that chip in his head. And he does alot of stupid things."
"I noticed."
"No, Angel. You don't notice. You've been in LA for the past three years. You don't know the slightly inkling about what he's done."
"Then tell me. What has he done that's so fabulous that you would forgive him for almost raping you?"
Buffy stared at Angel in disbelief. "He was totured by a Hell god, so that Glory wouldn't find out that Dawn is the key. He fought with my friends during the summer I was dead. He took care of Dawn. When I came back, he was just about the only one who didn't jump all over me. He talked to me when my friends were too busy worrying about their problems to listen. He was the first one that I told about being pulled from Heaven, and didn't tell the others, even though he could have just to gloat about being right about something going wrong. He could have told my friends that the chip didn't work on me, just to gloat about somthing going wrong. He could have told my friends that I was sleeping with him.."
Angel winced.
"Just to gloat. But he didn't tell them any of those things, because I didn't want them to know. He didn't tell Glory about Dawn, because he cared about how it would effect me. I don't think he even cared that he was being tortured, as long as Dawn and me were okay. When I was dead, my friends didn't tell him that they were bringing me back. He could have just skipped town and never come back, but he didn't. He had made a promise to me that he would protect Dawn until the end of the world. Look around, Angel. The world's still here. Even when I was dead, he kept his promise, even if I wasn't there to see it happen."
Angel was speechless. He just stared at the ground.
"I'm going home, now," she said. "I want you to get in you car and go back to LA with your friends and Cordelia. If you hurt him after I go, I'll hurt you."
Buffy walked off.
Angel watched her disappear from sight. Then, he left the cemetary and started back to LA.