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Falls the Shadow

Chapter 6

Touch

             Padmé awoke a few hours later, her arm lightly draped over his shoulders. She reached down under the sheet and slowly traced a delicate line from the top of his knee up to his chest, and down again. Anakin shivered slightly, and then rolled over from his stomach on to his side, sighing. Almost as if she were searching for uninjured places, she began exploring his body lightly with her hand, caressing and lightly teasing. As she listened, his breathing became short and ragged, even in his sleep. She stopped on his lower belly, just resting her hand there when he gasped once and sighed, and when she didn't move, his breathing became slow and steady once again. She left her hand there, thinking, that she could possibly just love him while he slept. Indeed, the temptation was overwhelming, it wasn't as if one or the other hadn't been awakened like that before, and really, there was no physical reason that they couldn't...

A little reluctantly, she withdrew her touch and instead, traced her fingers down his arm, finally taking his hand in her own. To her surprise, his fingers tightened around hers, and he pulled her hand up to his chest.

        "It's not that I don't want you..." He said softly.

        "Then why not?" she asked, more than a little frustrated.

        "It's just not right... not now..." he sighed, struggling for words.

        "So you've said," she conceded, "but you haven't told me 'why'?"

        After a long silence, she pressed again.

        "Anakin..."

        "I don't want to use you!" He blurted out at last. "I love you, and I don't want to just use your body for physical release... it's not lovemaking and it's not fair to you! That's all it would be right now, just... just simple physical release. I won't do that to you!"

         "Is that's all it's been Anakin?" she asked quietly, knowing full well that that wasn't the real answer, but it was probably as close as she would get from him now. "Just physical release...?"

         "Of course not!" he cried, sitting up suddenly and then seizing up in pain with the movement. He gasped and she helped him lower himself back down to the bed again.

         Padmé kissed his shoulder and he closed his eyes. "Of course not..." she echoed, kissing his shoulder again tenderly."Do you know how much I miss you when you're gone?" she whispered huskily. "How I dream of feeling your touch..." she took his hand into hers and kissed the open palm and as she spoke slowly brought it down to her chest, then to her breast."Your lips, your hands... your body..." with his one hand, she slowly began to massage her breast, and a small gasp escaped his lips. "Your body....YOU...." As he very slowly pulled his hand away, she moaned softly but didn't resist.

            "Please... Please" he choked. "I want you... but I don't want to... Please just not YET... a few days... that's all I ask..."

            "Alright," she sighed reluctantly, realizing that he was really just trying to punish himself and the only thing she could do was have patience with him. "But remember," she whispered softly, bring his hand up to her cheek again. "The release isn't just a physical thing. It's a way for us to be together in a way that no one else can share..."

She cast him a teasing look. "As long as you're SURE there's been no one else..."

             He arched an eyebrow at her and wrinkled his nose. 

             "Well actually, Padmé..." He began wryly. "You see, when I was on the Medical Frigate there WAS this little droid nurse..."

             They both started giggling, and Padmé knew that the worst of the storm was over for the time being. Their laughter was interrupted by a growling sound emanating from Padme's stomach, which only caused them to laugh harder.

             "When did you last eat?" Anakin asked her in all seriousness. "At least one of the appetites can be satisfied..."

             "The breakfast that you'd brought me," she admitted. "I haven't been very hungry since, I'm sorry."

              "Go eat," he said tenderly, and tried to suppress a yawn. "Damn healers and their concoctions. I need to sleep... you need to eat. We can work on the rest in the morning..."

              She smiled and slowly got out of bed.

Leaning over to kiss him she whispered in his ear, "I'm downstairs if you need me, no more acrobatics ok?" Anakin nodded his agreement. She walked to the door and paused just before she left.

"I love you Ani," she said softly. "With all my heart."

             "I love you too Padmé," he said quietly. "And by the way, I believe its 'Captain Skywalker' now... not Commander..."

              She stood there, wide eyed, unsure what to say. "I'm sorry..." she said quietly at last.

              Anakin kissed at her from the bed. "Don't worry Beloved," he said with a tender smile. "Go eat... If we need to talk about it anymore, well it can wait too... Now go..." He yawned again, lying back carefully on to his side. "Other wise I'll be telling you exactly what I do when I'm alone in bed..." he snickered as Padmé closed the door behind herself she allowed another quiet giggle. He was definitely on the road to recovery, she thought. It would just take a little time.