6, A HOMECOMING
Abby Lupin was a petite woman, but somehow she managed to hug both her son and his burden in a warm embrace.
"Oh Remus," she sighed when she finally let go. "You are way too thin! Don't they feed you right in Hogwarts? And what is this?"
Remus smirked at her curious face when she suddenly noticed the bundle in his arms.
"I brought a guest," he said softly. "She is …"
"She is ill, that much I can see. Who is she? What happened? Why …"
Jerome Lupin stood up and lightly touched his wife's arm.
"Abby, Cherie, let the boy catch his breath."
Abby clicked her tongue.
"Poor child! I'll prepare the guest room. You'll take care of them, won't you, Jerome?"
And off she fluttered.
Jerome tilted his head to one side and smiled indulgently, looking after her. Then he turned to Remus.
"She missed you like crazy. But she tries hard not to make too much of a fuss about you."
"I know."
"Now tell me, what happened?" Jerome frowned when he took in his son's dishevelled looks and tired face. "We heard about the attack in London. Have you been there? Is she a victim?"
Carefully he lifted the corner of the blanket to study Serene's face.
„Papa," said Remus softly, still holding Serene in his arms. "It is worse than just a Dementor's attack. Would you … look at her?"
His father helped him to lower the unconscious women onto the plush sofa in the living room. "You know I can't do anything without explicit permission." Jerome looked down at Serene and gently brushed the red locks from her pale face. "It is not only illegal, but against my own code of honour."
Remus nodded and kneeled next to the sofa to put a pillow under Serene's head.
"I know."
"As long as she remains in this state, she won't be able to allow me to scan her. Are there any relatives?" He raised an eyebrow and studied his son's worried face. "Or are you in a position to grant me that permission?"
The younger wizard avoided the scrutinising gaze. "She is my life-mate," he said simply.
"Remus!" Jerome drew him up from his kneeling position to hug him tightly. "At last! Your mother will be overjoyed."
Remus grabbed his wrist. "Papa, don't tell her. I don't want her to be disappointed in the end."
Jerome frowned. "But why?"
"It is a long story. And it is hard to explain. So lets keep it between the two of us for a while." He smirked. "I know it is next to impossible to keep something from Mum, but …"
"I'll try." Jerome stepped closer to Serene, and after a moment of just looking at her with unfocused eyes, he moved his hands over her body, only an inch away from her skin, from her toes up to her forehead.
Remus' eyes kept flickering from the woman he loved to his father. Emotions passed over Jerome's face, until he withdrew his hands and exhaled shakily.
"You were right," he said in a low voice. "So much unhappiness in such a young one … She must have been sad even before the Demontors got to her. The attack only broke down her barriers completely, and she seems to me a witch who does not deal with her emotions too easily."
Remus nodded wordlessly.
"There is something dark in her soul … a terrible fear. She'll have to face it or it will eat her alive. But for a start a few days of peace and fresh air, your mum's chicken soup and the presence of a loved one will make her feel better." He patted his son's arm and wondered briefly about the unhappy shadow that passed over Remus' face. "A nice warm bath will help her to relax and sleep. And you'll forgive me when I say you could do with a bath as well, son."
* * *
Claire sat by the beautifully decorated fireplace in her living room and watched her friend Laurel sleep.
Only a minute ago they had animatedly discussed the horrible attack on Kings Cross, and now Laurel was fast asleep, curled up into her chair like a baby.
Sirius sat in his newly adapted study upstairs and worked on his new book. Claire had noticed with some relief that his initial fun with the Fidelius charm had passed. He wrote with tremendous discipline, took her for long walks and only in the evening went to Hogwarts to confer with Snape and Dumbledore.
Otherwise their live was calm and undisturbed. Sometimes she wondered if Malfoy would demand she joined the Death Eaters once the baby was born and she could take the Dark Mark without endangering the young life. But then she pushed the thought firmly into the darkest corner of her mind.
Jonah played on the carpet with one of Laurel's shoes.
Claire bowed down to the little boy - no easy manoeuvre, considering her baby-bump - and smiled at him.
"Honey, what's the matter with your Mommy?"
Jonah looked up and giggled when he saw Laurel's closed eyes.
"Mommy," he said and pointed. "Sleep."
"That's right," said Claire, quite impressed. „But it is only three in the afternoon. Shouldn't she be awake now?"
Jonah struggled up and tapped to Laurel, hitting her knee with the shoe before Claire could hold him back.
Immediately Laurel sat up, still dazed but awake, her eyes frantically searching the room.
"Jonah?"
He beamed at her. „Mommy! Sleep!"
Laurel exhaled slowly and blew him a kiss. Then she gave Claire an apologetical smile.
"Sorry. It is only that I am so tired lately."
„I can see that." Claire's grey eyes bore into Laurel's brown. "What's wrong? Do you feel ill?"
"No." Laurel rose, stretched and rubbed her lower back with a sigh. "Jonah wakes up every night, screaming with fear. He has the worst nightmares you can imagine. And it is almost impossible to calm him. Warm milk, singing, walking - I tried it all. But it feels like I've been walking for miles, and still he only falls asleep from sheer exhaustion."
"And so do you obviously," decided Claire. "What about Severus? Can't you take turns with the child? After all you have to teach and all that. What if you fall asleep in class?"
Laurel stared into the fire without seeing the flames. How could she tell her friend that Severus spent most of the night in the potions lab and avoided any contact with Jonah as if the child were some dangerous creature? How could she tell her that they had not shared a bed for weeks? For one thing she was always tired, and in the rare nights when Jonah did not need her, Severus' side of the bed remained cold and empty.
"I am just glad that the students are gone for the holidays," she said slowly. "And I still hope that Jonah's nightmares get fewer when he gets a bit older."
She bowed down and gave the child a big kiss, and Jonah hugged her with chubby arms.
Claire watched and laid a hand on her belly. The baby moved, kicked her violently, and she smiled.
* * *
Serene woke up to the sound of soft rain drumming onto a thatched roof. For a minute she just lay there, and let the different sensations slowly seep into her conscience. The pillow smelled of starch and lavender. She was warm through and through and for the first time since she'd left Hogwarts she didn't feel like crying.
Next to the bed stood a comfy chair, and Remus slept in it, her hand in his.
When she tried to sit up, he yawned and opened his eyes.
"Hey," he said softly.
Serene noticed that he wore checked pyjama pants and a linen shirt, and that she was bare naked. There was no need to be embarrassed about that, she told herself firmly. After all this was not the first time he'd seen her naked.
"Where are we?"
"At my parent's house." He stretched his lean body with relish. "Lets get up and join them for dinner. They'll begin to suspect I've eaten you by now."
"Wait!" she raised a hand in the desperate attempt to comprehend what he'd just said. "We are … at you parent's house?"
Remus sat down on the edge of her bed and gently put a hand under her head. "I did not know what to do with you. I was worried." He helped her to sit up, and she let him, although she felt much stronger by now. "Here, you can wear this." Throwing a bathrobe at her, he sniffed the air. "Mhm, it is cock au vin tonight. You definitely have to get up."
"But I …" Serene felt her head and knew by just touching it that her hair resembled a broom. "I look terrible!"
"They've seen you much worse," Remus remarked casually and snorted when she threw the pillow at him. "No, really! This is not a place where you need to make an impression. They are only my parents."
Helplessly Serene sunk back into the pillows and closed her eyes.
While Serene let Abby heap deliciously smelling chicken stew onto her plate, she took in the room with wonderment. She had always thought that Hogwarts was the cosiest, warmest place on earth, but Abby and Jerome Lupin's house beat it all. Every little thing, from the bowl with apples and nuts on the mantle to the heavy linen napkins betrayed that somebody took great pleasure in making this house a good place to live in.
Abby and Jerome treated her like a familiar guest - friendly, without any pretence. Both of them had open, friendly faces. And Remus had inherited the best features of both parents - his father's tall and slender frame and warm eyes, and his mother's ready smile and light brown hair.
Abby beamed at her son.
"Ah Rem, it's so good to have you back. And your … friend, too. Now lets eat, and tell us all the news because I am dieing with curiosity."
"There is not much to tell, Mum," Remus smiled. He had informed them about the attack at Kings Cross the night before, when he wrote a short owl for Dumbledore. "But no news is good news, right? I still hold a job. I earn my keep. I have not eaten anyone lately …"
The Lupins laughed, and Serene noticed how relaxed Remus was when he talked with his parents, without the polite restraint that normally kept him from showing too many emotions. His mother enveloped him in a rapid interrogation about his life in Hogwarts.
"And you, Serene, are a teacher as well?"
Jerome winked at her.
"Yes. Yes," she blushed a little, too aware that he had caught her staring.
"Abby won't let go until she has answers to all her questions, and Remus knows that. So you'll have to let them get this out of the way, and put up with me for a while."
"I teach Divinations," said Serene shyly. "I mean, I only assist Sybill Trelawney but …"
"Sybill!" Remus' father chuckled softly. "How would have thought she'd end up as a teacher one day. I knew her as a girl, long before she married Garrick Trelawney," he explained. "We both grew up in southern France. She was a bit … disorganised."
"Oh, she still is."
"Rubeus Hagrid is the new game keeper, isn't he? I really need to talk to him one of these days. Remus writes home wondrous things about his talents with magical creatures."
Serene nodded. "He really has a special gift with them. If you are interested in Hippogriffs or Dragons, he'll be overjoyed to talk to you."
"Interested?" Abby had heard her last words and laughed. "Honey, this wizard here lives and breathes Dragons."
"I forgot to tell you, that we are in Sherwood Forrest," added Remus. "My father works for the MWF."
"The MWF?" Serene shook her head in confusion.
"The Magical Wildlife Fund. This forest is the largest Wildlife Resort in Britain, much larger than your Forbidden Forrest at Hogwarts." Jerome spread his arms proudly. "We breed almost any form of magical creature here, except the larger dragons of course." An unhappy shadow passed over his face and for a moment his eyes showed the same longing as Hagrid's when he talked about his beloved fire spitting friends. "We also take in creatures that have been smuggled into the country and then abandoned by their owners."
"I dread the thought that Christmas is only a day away," sighed Abby. "Last year we got the first abandoned Niffler on New Year's eve. People think they make cute pets, but of course they are not to be kept in a house or apartment."
Serene tried to imagine a Niffler in a living room, desperately trying to dig trenches into the carpet.
"It is the same in the Muggle word," she said. "Right after Christmas …"
"You are a Muggle?" Abby's eyes lit up. "How delightful!"
Remus shook his head, smiling at his mother's excitement. "No, Mum, she only grew up as a Muggle. But she is a fully capable witch. You are still the only Muggle woman in the house."
"You are a Muggle?" Serene blushed. "Sorry, I didn't mean …"
Abby shrugged good-naturedly. "Oh, never mind. I only hoped that finally there was somebody who chops carrots with a knife as well."
"But I do!" Serene smiled. "I mean, if I ever had to cook, I'd probably do it that way. I don't know any cooking spells."
"I met Jerome in France where I spent the holidays. I only found out that he was a wizard …"
"A night later," laughed her husband and kissed her hand.
"Jerome!" scolded Abby gently but did not withdraw her hand. "What shall Remus' guest think!"
"I think it was probably quiet a shock to discover that," said Serene, secretly touched by the open display of tenderness.
"Oh, the shock was there, but it was quit pleasant, I dare to say," smirked Jerome.
"So your parents were Muggles," Abby would not let go. "How did they react when they found out that you are a witch?"
Serene avoided her gaze. "They thought I was ill. They took me to the doctor."
Remus leaned back in his seat and watched her silently.
"And how do they cope today?" asked Abby. "They must be very proud that you are a teacher at Hogwarts now!"
„My parents are dead."
Serene did not look at anybody, and once more Remus fought the urge to comfort her.
„It must have been very hard on your parents," said Jerome sympathetically. "To know that they could not help you, and they probably did not fully understand your condition either."
Remus saw how Serene tensed. He knew that she avoided talking about her parents or her past, and although he had always suspected that the explanation for her brittle behaviour lay in her past, he had never harassed her to tell him.
She kept her gaze riveted at the plate when she answered. "They thought I was crazy."
Abby frowned. "But why …"
Serene went on, almost whispering. "One doctor after the other. Drugs. Therapy. When I was thirteen, they finally found a doctor who had a medical term for the visions that came over me."
"Clairvoyance." Jerome patted her hand and gave Remus a confused look, when she withdrew it quickly.
"Schizophrenia."
Abby seemed the only one who knew what the Muggle term meant, and explained it so unemotionally, that some of Serene's embarrassment eased.
"I understand." Jerome mused. "And how do the Muggle doctors treat … Scizo … this disease?"
"More drugs. A closed ward for a few years. Then they declared I was getting better."
"While you had only learned to hide your true feelings."
She looked sharply at Remus' father, whose eyes only betrayed kindness - much like his son's. "How do you …"
"Papa is an emphat," explained Remus.
"An emphat?" Serene frowned. "Is that some kind of doctor? Or a healer, like Claire?"
"Well, I would not call it a healer, but a … feeler." Abby chuckled softly.
"In a way my condition resembles yours," Jerome said with a faint smile. "I can feel pain, joy, any emotion in others. But there is nothing I can do about it. I can't make them feel better. Just like you can see what is going to happen, but can't do anything to prevent it."
"Enough of that," decided Abby. "How did you get that beautiful name, Serene?"
Defiantly Serene glared at her. "I chose it myself."
"You chose it?"
"I thought if only I could drop my old name, I could drop my old self as well," Serene answered with a tinge of bitterness. "But it didn't work out."
"So what's your real name then? What did your parents call you?" Remus reached for her hand under the table and for once she gave in and squeezed it gratefully.
"Sarah. It's Sarah," she said softly. "But my grandma called me Sally."
"Well, I think Serene is a lovely name." Jerome stood up. "Lets move on to the living room and have a cup of tea before we go to bed."
In the cosy living room, settled in a deep soft couch, Serene watched the Lupins with slight envy and genuine wonderment. They constantly teased each other, and still there was a mutual understanding of unconditional love and acceptance beyond their light banter ...
"Rem," said Abby softly and nudged him. "Look."
Only then he noticed that Serene had fallen asleep, her red hair like a silky throw over the arm of the couch.
Jerome took Remus' teacup and nodded at his son. "Sleep is good for her."
"I need to return to Hogwarts tomorrow. Can Serene stay?" Remus looked at his parents.
"But of course she can stay!" Abby patted his arm. "When will you come back?"
"In time for the Yule feast in the village.."
"Well, in the meantime we'll work out a way to make Serene live up to her name a little more, won't we Abby?" Jerome stood up and hugged his son. "Take care."
"Ah, Papa, you must not forget that I am the big bad wolf. So let the others take care."
Still smiling Remus picked up the sleeping woman and carried her up the stairs.
He put her down on the bed, and once again undressed her and covered her with a soft duvet.
Serene sighed contently and opened her eyes.
"Are you cold?" Remus asked very softly.
Instead of an answer she reached for his hand, nestled her cheek into his palm and smiled dreamily.
"Don't go away," she mumbled.
So Remus slipped under the covers and fell asleep as soon as his head touched the pillow, but not before brushing her ear softly with his lips.
* * *
Severus and Sirius sat in Dumbledore's office.
For the last hour they had discussed Severus' findings concerning the blood- sample Sirius had stolen from Lucius Malfoy a few months ago. The Headmaster watched the two young wizards with worry. Sirius seemed to adapt to the loneliness of the Fidelius charm rather well, but Severus seemed subdued and tired. Dumbledore knew well that the Potions master spent hour after hour in the lab, trying to find a new potion to treat Remus Lupin's lycanthropy. And then there were the news they'd gotten lately …
Neither the Muggle newspapers nor the Daily Prophet had reported Malfoy's death, but Remus' owl had made it clear that Voldemort's third in command had actually been killed at Kings Cross.
Dumbledore sighed. "We should call it a day. It is way past midnight."
Sirius picked up the owl Remus had sent and read it once more.
"I still don't get it. Moony says it looked like the Forbidden curse, and he should know the signs. But why would the Death Eaters kill each other?" Remus reported how he'd found the wizard's dead body in the station master's office.
"A power struggle," said Dumbledore. "Ben Olsen is a very … ambitious wizard. Maybe he planed this raid without Malfoy's knowledge to impress Voldemort?"
"But why should Malfoy be at Kings Cross at all? Why not stay in his townhouse and wait till the attack was over, and then confront Olsen?" Sirius frowned. "Why cast the Imperius curse at the Muggle and risk certain death from the hand of an Auror or his fellow Death Eaters?"
Severus rose impatiently. "Draco was on that train," he snapped at Black.
"So?"
"So what? Slytherins love their children too!" Severus turned away. "I remember the day when Draco was born. Lucius was … happy. I have never seen him happy before or after. It was always as if a piece of him was missing and he was hunting for it, without knowing what it really was. And he probably loved nothing and nobody. But he loved that boy."
Sirius looked down at the floor in embarrassment.
"I am sorry," he said eventually. "It's only that he seemed to be interested in Draco's grades only, and in his achievement."
"Draco was his only child. Of course Lucius wanted him to excel."
"So he loved him. You think that's why he stopped the train?"
"Well, that's how love is," said Severus bitterly and moved to the door. "It makes you weak, and kills you in the end."
The door fell shut after him, and both Headmaster and fugitive stared at each other in silent worry - and even some pity for Lucius Malfoy.
* * *
When the grey light of morning fell through the window, Remus gently released Serene from his embrace and slipped out of the bed. Dressing silently, he looked at the sleeping woman. She seemed to feel better now, although there were still dark shadows under her eyes.
He kneeled next to the bed.
"Serene," he nudged her gently. "Wake up."
When she only moaned, he nudged her again and kissed her forehead.
"I need to return to Hogwarts to report in detail what happened at Kings Cross." And he'd have to apologize for some of the things he had said when Dumbledore had forced him to remain in Hogwarts. He still did not understand, but had begun to believe that the old wizard might have been right after all, again." But I'll return by Christmas day. You stay here, do you hear me?"
She nodded silently, suddenly wide-awake.
"You'll be safe with my parents. I want you to eat whatever my mother puts on your plate, and to sleep as much as you can, alright? Papa is going to show you the forest, and on Christmas Day my sisters and their offspring will arrive. So you won't have time to get bored. And then there'll be the Yule feast in the village."
"But I …"
"I need to leave now." He kissed her again and went to the door.
Serene sat up and hugged a pillow against her breasts.
"Remy!" she called softly when he had almost left the room. "Will you come back for me?"
The barely veiled fear drew him to her side immediately.
Serene looked at her hands in embarrassment and felt even more ridiculous, when she noticed they were trembling. Now here she was, Miss Independence, who had made it her principle to never need anybody, and was all but begging Remus Lupin to not leave her.
He sat down at the side of the bed and gently cupped her chin to make her look up.
"Serene?" His voice was very soft, but very serious at the same time. "I'll come back for you. I promise."
She nodded.
But when he looked at her a last time before he shut the door, he saw that she did not believe him.
* * *
Abby Lupin was a petite woman, but somehow she managed to hug both her son and his burden in a warm embrace.
"Oh Remus," she sighed when she finally let go. "You are way too thin! Don't they feed you right in Hogwarts? And what is this?"
Remus smirked at her curious face when she suddenly noticed the bundle in his arms.
"I brought a guest," he said softly. "She is …"
"She is ill, that much I can see. Who is she? What happened? Why …"
Jerome Lupin stood up and lightly touched his wife's arm.
"Abby, Cherie, let the boy catch his breath."
Abby clicked her tongue.
"Poor child! I'll prepare the guest room. You'll take care of them, won't you, Jerome?"
And off she fluttered.
Jerome tilted his head to one side and smiled indulgently, looking after her. Then he turned to Remus.
"She missed you like crazy. But she tries hard not to make too much of a fuss about you."
"I know."
"Now tell me, what happened?" Jerome frowned when he took in his son's dishevelled looks and tired face. "We heard about the attack in London. Have you been there? Is she a victim?"
Carefully he lifted the corner of the blanket to study Serene's face.
„Papa," said Remus softly, still holding Serene in his arms. "It is worse than just a Dementor's attack. Would you … look at her?"
His father helped him to lower the unconscious women onto the plush sofa in the living room. "You know I can't do anything without explicit permission." Jerome looked down at Serene and gently brushed the red locks from her pale face. "It is not only illegal, but against my own code of honour."
Remus nodded and kneeled next to the sofa to put a pillow under Serene's head.
"I know."
"As long as she remains in this state, she won't be able to allow me to scan her. Are there any relatives?" He raised an eyebrow and studied his son's worried face. "Or are you in a position to grant me that permission?"
The younger wizard avoided the scrutinising gaze. "She is my life-mate," he said simply.
"Remus!" Jerome drew him up from his kneeling position to hug him tightly. "At last! Your mother will be overjoyed."
Remus grabbed his wrist. "Papa, don't tell her. I don't want her to be disappointed in the end."
Jerome frowned. "But why?"
"It is a long story. And it is hard to explain. So lets keep it between the two of us for a while." He smirked. "I know it is next to impossible to keep something from Mum, but …"
"I'll try." Jerome stepped closer to Serene, and after a moment of just looking at her with unfocused eyes, he moved his hands over her body, only an inch away from her skin, from her toes up to her forehead.
Remus' eyes kept flickering from the woman he loved to his father. Emotions passed over Jerome's face, until he withdrew his hands and exhaled shakily.
"You were right," he said in a low voice. "So much unhappiness in such a young one … She must have been sad even before the Demontors got to her. The attack only broke down her barriers completely, and she seems to me a witch who does not deal with her emotions too easily."
Remus nodded wordlessly.
"There is something dark in her soul … a terrible fear. She'll have to face it or it will eat her alive. But for a start a few days of peace and fresh air, your mum's chicken soup and the presence of a loved one will make her feel better." He patted his son's arm and wondered briefly about the unhappy shadow that passed over Remus' face. "A nice warm bath will help her to relax and sleep. And you'll forgive me when I say you could do with a bath as well, son."
* * *
Claire sat by the beautifully decorated fireplace in her living room and watched her friend Laurel sleep.
Only a minute ago they had animatedly discussed the horrible attack on Kings Cross, and now Laurel was fast asleep, curled up into her chair like a baby.
Sirius sat in his newly adapted study upstairs and worked on his new book. Claire had noticed with some relief that his initial fun with the Fidelius charm had passed. He wrote with tremendous discipline, took her for long walks and only in the evening went to Hogwarts to confer with Snape and Dumbledore.
Otherwise their live was calm and undisturbed. Sometimes she wondered if Malfoy would demand she joined the Death Eaters once the baby was born and she could take the Dark Mark without endangering the young life. But then she pushed the thought firmly into the darkest corner of her mind.
Jonah played on the carpet with one of Laurel's shoes.
Claire bowed down to the little boy - no easy manoeuvre, considering her baby-bump - and smiled at him.
"Honey, what's the matter with your Mommy?"
Jonah looked up and giggled when he saw Laurel's closed eyes.
"Mommy," he said and pointed. "Sleep."
"That's right," said Claire, quite impressed. „But it is only three in the afternoon. Shouldn't she be awake now?"
Jonah struggled up and tapped to Laurel, hitting her knee with the shoe before Claire could hold him back.
Immediately Laurel sat up, still dazed but awake, her eyes frantically searching the room.
"Jonah?"
He beamed at her. „Mommy! Sleep!"
Laurel exhaled slowly and blew him a kiss. Then she gave Claire an apologetical smile.
"Sorry. It is only that I am so tired lately."
„I can see that." Claire's grey eyes bore into Laurel's brown. "What's wrong? Do you feel ill?"
"No." Laurel rose, stretched and rubbed her lower back with a sigh. "Jonah wakes up every night, screaming with fear. He has the worst nightmares you can imagine. And it is almost impossible to calm him. Warm milk, singing, walking - I tried it all. But it feels like I've been walking for miles, and still he only falls asleep from sheer exhaustion."
"And so do you obviously," decided Claire. "What about Severus? Can't you take turns with the child? After all you have to teach and all that. What if you fall asleep in class?"
Laurel stared into the fire without seeing the flames. How could she tell her friend that Severus spent most of the night in the potions lab and avoided any contact with Jonah as if the child were some dangerous creature? How could she tell her that they had not shared a bed for weeks? For one thing she was always tired, and in the rare nights when Jonah did not need her, Severus' side of the bed remained cold and empty.
"I am just glad that the students are gone for the holidays," she said slowly. "And I still hope that Jonah's nightmares get fewer when he gets a bit older."
She bowed down and gave the child a big kiss, and Jonah hugged her with chubby arms.
Claire watched and laid a hand on her belly. The baby moved, kicked her violently, and she smiled.
* * *
Serene woke up to the sound of soft rain drumming onto a thatched roof. For a minute she just lay there, and let the different sensations slowly seep into her conscience. The pillow smelled of starch and lavender. She was warm through and through and for the first time since she'd left Hogwarts she didn't feel like crying.
Next to the bed stood a comfy chair, and Remus slept in it, her hand in his.
When she tried to sit up, he yawned and opened his eyes.
"Hey," he said softly.
Serene noticed that he wore checked pyjama pants and a linen shirt, and that she was bare naked. There was no need to be embarrassed about that, she told herself firmly. After all this was not the first time he'd seen her naked.
"Where are we?"
"At my parent's house." He stretched his lean body with relish. "Lets get up and join them for dinner. They'll begin to suspect I've eaten you by now."
"Wait!" she raised a hand in the desperate attempt to comprehend what he'd just said. "We are … at you parent's house?"
Remus sat down on the edge of her bed and gently put a hand under her head. "I did not know what to do with you. I was worried." He helped her to sit up, and she let him, although she felt much stronger by now. "Here, you can wear this." Throwing a bathrobe at her, he sniffed the air. "Mhm, it is cock au vin tonight. You definitely have to get up."
"But I …" Serene felt her head and knew by just touching it that her hair resembled a broom. "I look terrible!"
"They've seen you much worse," Remus remarked casually and snorted when she threw the pillow at him. "No, really! This is not a place where you need to make an impression. They are only my parents."
Helplessly Serene sunk back into the pillows and closed her eyes.
While Serene let Abby heap deliciously smelling chicken stew onto her plate, she took in the room with wonderment. She had always thought that Hogwarts was the cosiest, warmest place on earth, but Abby and Jerome Lupin's house beat it all. Every little thing, from the bowl with apples and nuts on the mantle to the heavy linen napkins betrayed that somebody took great pleasure in making this house a good place to live in.
Abby and Jerome treated her like a familiar guest - friendly, without any pretence. Both of them had open, friendly faces. And Remus had inherited the best features of both parents - his father's tall and slender frame and warm eyes, and his mother's ready smile and light brown hair.
Abby beamed at her son.
"Ah Rem, it's so good to have you back. And your … friend, too. Now lets eat, and tell us all the news because I am dieing with curiosity."
"There is not much to tell, Mum," Remus smiled. He had informed them about the attack at Kings Cross the night before, when he wrote a short owl for Dumbledore. "But no news is good news, right? I still hold a job. I earn my keep. I have not eaten anyone lately …"
The Lupins laughed, and Serene noticed how relaxed Remus was when he talked with his parents, without the polite restraint that normally kept him from showing too many emotions. His mother enveloped him in a rapid interrogation about his life in Hogwarts.
"And you, Serene, are a teacher as well?"
Jerome winked at her.
"Yes. Yes," she blushed a little, too aware that he had caught her staring.
"Abby won't let go until she has answers to all her questions, and Remus knows that. So you'll have to let them get this out of the way, and put up with me for a while."
"I teach Divinations," said Serene shyly. "I mean, I only assist Sybill Trelawney but …"
"Sybill!" Remus' father chuckled softly. "How would have thought she'd end up as a teacher one day. I knew her as a girl, long before she married Garrick Trelawney," he explained. "We both grew up in southern France. She was a bit … disorganised."
"Oh, she still is."
"Rubeus Hagrid is the new game keeper, isn't he? I really need to talk to him one of these days. Remus writes home wondrous things about his talents with magical creatures."
Serene nodded. "He really has a special gift with them. If you are interested in Hippogriffs or Dragons, he'll be overjoyed to talk to you."
"Interested?" Abby had heard her last words and laughed. "Honey, this wizard here lives and breathes Dragons."
"I forgot to tell you, that we are in Sherwood Forrest," added Remus. "My father works for the MWF."
"The MWF?" Serene shook her head in confusion.
"The Magical Wildlife Fund. This forest is the largest Wildlife Resort in Britain, much larger than your Forbidden Forrest at Hogwarts." Jerome spread his arms proudly. "We breed almost any form of magical creature here, except the larger dragons of course." An unhappy shadow passed over his face and for a moment his eyes showed the same longing as Hagrid's when he talked about his beloved fire spitting friends. "We also take in creatures that have been smuggled into the country and then abandoned by their owners."
"I dread the thought that Christmas is only a day away," sighed Abby. "Last year we got the first abandoned Niffler on New Year's eve. People think they make cute pets, but of course they are not to be kept in a house or apartment."
Serene tried to imagine a Niffler in a living room, desperately trying to dig trenches into the carpet.
"It is the same in the Muggle word," she said. "Right after Christmas …"
"You are a Muggle?" Abby's eyes lit up. "How delightful!"
Remus shook his head, smiling at his mother's excitement. "No, Mum, she only grew up as a Muggle. But she is a fully capable witch. You are still the only Muggle woman in the house."
"You are a Muggle?" Serene blushed. "Sorry, I didn't mean …"
Abby shrugged good-naturedly. "Oh, never mind. I only hoped that finally there was somebody who chops carrots with a knife as well."
"But I do!" Serene smiled. "I mean, if I ever had to cook, I'd probably do it that way. I don't know any cooking spells."
"I met Jerome in France where I spent the holidays. I only found out that he was a wizard …"
"A night later," laughed her husband and kissed her hand.
"Jerome!" scolded Abby gently but did not withdraw her hand. "What shall Remus' guest think!"
"I think it was probably quiet a shock to discover that," said Serene, secretly touched by the open display of tenderness.
"Oh, the shock was there, but it was quit pleasant, I dare to say," smirked Jerome.
"So your parents were Muggles," Abby would not let go. "How did they react when they found out that you are a witch?"
Serene avoided her gaze. "They thought I was ill. They took me to the doctor."
Remus leaned back in his seat and watched her silently.
"And how do they cope today?" asked Abby. "They must be very proud that you are a teacher at Hogwarts now!"
„My parents are dead."
Serene did not look at anybody, and once more Remus fought the urge to comfort her.
„It must have been very hard on your parents," said Jerome sympathetically. "To know that they could not help you, and they probably did not fully understand your condition either."
Remus saw how Serene tensed. He knew that she avoided talking about her parents or her past, and although he had always suspected that the explanation for her brittle behaviour lay in her past, he had never harassed her to tell him.
She kept her gaze riveted at the plate when she answered. "They thought I was crazy."
Abby frowned. "But why …"
Serene went on, almost whispering. "One doctor after the other. Drugs. Therapy. When I was thirteen, they finally found a doctor who had a medical term for the visions that came over me."
"Clairvoyance." Jerome patted her hand and gave Remus a confused look, when she withdrew it quickly.
"Schizophrenia."
Abby seemed the only one who knew what the Muggle term meant, and explained it so unemotionally, that some of Serene's embarrassment eased.
"I understand." Jerome mused. "And how do the Muggle doctors treat … Scizo … this disease?"
"More drugs. A closed ward for a few years. Then they declared I was getting better."
"While you had only learned to hide your true feelings."
She looked sharply at Remus' father, whose eyes only betrayed kindness - much like his son's. "How do you …"
"Papa is an emphat," explained Remus.
"An emphat?" Serene frowned. "Is that some kind of doctor? Or a healer, like Claire?"
"Well, I would not call it a healer, but a … feeler." Abby chuckled softly.
"In a way my condition resembles yours," Jerome said with a faint smile. "I can feel pain, joy, any emotion in others. But there is nothing I can do about it. I can't make them feel better. Just like you can see what is going to happen, but can't do anything to prevent it."
"Enough of that," decided Abby. "How did you get that beautiful name, Serene?"
Defiantly Serene glared at her. "I chose it myself."
"You chose it?"
"I thought if only I could drop my old name, I could drop my old self as well," Serene answered with a tinge of bitterness. "But it didn't work out."
"So what's your real name then? What did your parents call you?" Remus reached for her hand under the table and for once she gave in and squeezed it gratefully.
"Sarah. It's Sarah," she said softly. "But my grandma called me Sally."
"Well, I think Serene is a lovely name." Jerome stood up. "Lets move on to the living room and have a cup of tea before we go to bed."
In the cosy living room, settled in a deep soft couch, Serene watched the Lupins with slight envy and genuine wonderment. They constantly teased each other, and still there was a mutual understanding of unconditional love and acceptance beyond their light banter ...
"Rem," said Abby softly and nudged him. "Look."
Only then he noticed that Serene had fallen asleep, her red hair like a silky throw over the arm of the couch.
Jerome took Remus' teacup and nodded at his son. "Sleep is good for her."
"I need to return to Hogwarts tomorrow. Can Serene stay?" Remus looked at his parents.
"But of course she can stay!" Abby patted his arm. "When will you come back?"
"In time for the Yule feast in the village.."
"Well, in the meantime we'll work out a way to make Serene live up to her name a little more, won't we Abby?" Jerome stood up and hugged his son. "Take care."
"Ah, Papa, you must not forget that I am the big bad wolf. So let the others take care."
Still smiling Remus picked up the sleeping woman and carried her up the stairs.
He put her down on the bed, and once again undressed her and covered her with a soft duvet.
Serene sighed contently and opened her eyes.
"Are you cold?" Remus asked very softly.
Instead of an answer she reached for his hand, nestled her cheek into his palm and smiled dreamily.
"Don't go away," she mumbled.
So Remus slipped under the covers and fell asleep as soon as his head touched the pillow, but not before brushing her ear softly with his lips.
* * *
Severus and Sirius sat in Dumbledore's office.
For the last hour they had discussed Severus' findings concerning the blood- sample Sirius had stolen from Lucius Malfoy a few months ago. The Headmaster watched the two young wizards with worry. Sirius seemed to adapt to the loneliness of the Fidelius charm rather well, but Severus seemed subdued and tired. Dumbledore knew well that the Potions master spent hour after hour in the lab, trying to find a new potion to treat Remus Lupin's lycanthropy. And then there were the news they'd gotten lately …
Neither the Muggle newspapers nor the Daily Prophet had reported Malfoy's death, but Remus' owl had made it clear that Voldemort's third in command had actually been killed at Kings Cross.
Dumbledore sighed. "We should call it a day. It is way past midnight."
Sirius picked up the owl Remus had sent and read it once more.
"I still don't get it. Moony says it looked like the Forbidden curse, and he should know the signs. But why would the Death Eaters kill each other?" Remus reported how he'd found the wizard's dead body in the station master's office.
"A power struggle," said Dumbledore. "Ben Olsen is a very … ambitious wizard. Maybe he planed this raid without Malfoy's knowledge to impress Voldemort?"
"But why should Malfoy be at Kings Cross at all? Why not stay in his townhouse and wait till the attack was over, and then confront Olsen?" Sirius frowned. "Why cast the Imperius curse at the Muggle and risk certain death from the hand of an Auror or his fellow Death Eaters?"
Severus rose impatiently. "Draco was on that train," he snapped at Black.
"So?"
"So what? Slytherins love their children too!" Severus turned away. "I remember the day when Draco was born. Lucius was … happy. I have never seen him happy before or after. It was always as if a piece of him was missing and he was hunting for it, without knowing what it really was. And he probably loved nothing and nobody. But he loved that boy."
Sirius looked down at the floor in embarrassment.
"I am sorry," he said eventually. "It's only that he seemed to be interested in Draco's grades only, and in his achievement."
"Draco was his only child. Of course Lucius wanted him to excel."
"So he loved him. You think that's why he stopped the train?"
"Well, that's how love is," said Severus bitterly and moved to the door. "It makes you weak, and kills you in the end."
The door fell shut after him, and both Headmaster and fugitive stared at each other in silent worry - and even some pity for Lucius Malfoy.
* * *
When the grey light of morning fell through the window, Remus gently released Serene from his embrace and slipped out of the bed. Dressing silently, he looked at the sleeping woman. She seemed to feel better now, although there were still dark shadows under her eyes.
He kneeled next to the bed.
"Serene," he nudged her gently. "Wake up."
When she only moaned, he nudged her again and kissed her forehead.
"I need to return to Hogwarts to report in detail what happened at Kings Cross." And he'd have to apologize for some of the things he had said when Dumbledore had forced him to remain in Hogwarts. He still did not understand, but had begun to believe that the old wizard might have been right after all, again." But I'll return by Christmas day. You stay here, do you hear me?"
She nodded silently, suddenly wide-awake.
"You'll be safe with my parents. I want you to eat whatever my mother puts on your plate, and to sleep as much as you can, alright? Papa is going to show you the forest, and on Christmas Day my sisters and their offspring will arrive. So you won't have time to get bored. And then there'll be the Yule feast in the village."
"But I …"
"I need to leave now." He kissed her again and went to the door.
Serene sat up and hugged a pillow against her breasts.
"Remy!" she called softly when he had almost left the room. "Will you come back for me?"
The barely veiled fear drew him to her side immediately.
Serene looked at her hands in embarrassment and felt even more ridiculous, when she noticed they were trembling. Now here she was, Miss Independence, who had made it her principle to never need anybody, and was all but begging Remus Lupin to not leave her.
He sat down at the side of the bed and gently cupped her chin to make her look up.
"Serene?" His voice was very soft, but very serious at the same time. "I'll come back for you. I promise."
She nodded.
But when he looked at her a last time before he shut the door, he saw that she did not believe him.
* * *