I'd Give My All
Rachel awoke again on the small, four-foot bed she had fallen asleep on. She felt so much better that she had gotten to tell him that she forgave him. She wondered if things were going to be normal again soon. She was so tired of running. It was time to settle down. She took a shower and got dressed. It was still early, 7:45 am, so she decided to go to Monica's and say hi.
As soon as she entered Monica's, pancakes filled her nose. Of course, Monica was cooking, Josh was sitting on his daddy's lap, and Ross was at the table talking to Monica. Rachel smiled uncomfortably and walked toward Monica.
"Hey Mon, morning."
"Hi. Do you want one or two?" Monica asked not paying attention.
"Oh, none. I'm not hungry. Ahem. So, what are you doing today?"
"Waiting to pop." Monica joked, gesturing towards her stomach. Rachel laughed. Chandler stood up and walked over to Monica.
"Uh, Mon, we have to get to your gyno appointment." He said checking his watch. Monica turned off the stove and went over to her purse.
"Rachel, what are you doing today?"
"I'm just checking listings for an apartment. Why?"
"Can you watch Josh for a few?" Monica asked pleadingly. "I need this THING out of me."
"Yea. Go ahead. Do you have the Sunday paper?"
"Uh huh. On the table. I'll see you later. Bye Josh, mommy loves you." Monica waved to her son and she and Chandler exited. Rachel turned around slowly, and saw Ross was still there. He was drinking a coffee, looking at the paper. She needed the apartment section, but she didn't want to ask him for it. She walked into the living room and sat next to Josh who was staring at her with a Monica glare.
"What?" Rachel asked a bit annoyed.
"Where's my mom?" He asked in a mean tone. Rachel laughed a bit. For being a brat, he was still a cutie.
"She's getting her tummy checked out by the doctors." She said as she began to straighten up the living room. There wasn't really anything to clean, but she thought she might as well get whatever she could pick up.
"Who are YOU?" He asked in the same tone.
"I'm your aunt Rachel." Rachel said happily. The little boy simply shook his head.
"No. I ondly gots two ants. Ant Feeby and ant Ross." Rachel looked at the little boy and laughed again.
"I think you mean UNCLE Ross." She corrected. Ross' head popped up reacting to hearing his name.
"What?" He asked.
"Nothing. I was just explaining to Josh that you were his Uncle and not his Aunt." She smiled.
"Right." He said nodding. He averted his eyes back to the newspaper. Rachel walked slowly over to the kitchen. She looked back to see that Josh was glued to the TV. She looked back over at Ross. Rachel sat down across from him at the table.
"So." She sighed.
"Yea?" Ross asked, not looking off of the paper.
"How are you?" She asked. She didn't know why they were acting so weird towards each other. Ross wouldn't look her in the eyes.
"Fine." He said. He looked down at his watch, and then he stood. "I uh, I have to go to work." He quickly took his briefcase and left. Rachel put her head in her hands and sighed another sigh. She thought the awkwardness would be over by now. She looked back over at Josh. His eyes peeking over the couch. She smiled, but he looked away.
"Josh, come here." Rachel said standing. The little boy shook his head. "Josh, It's ok. I won't bite. Just come here, I want to talk to you." Reluctantly, the Josh stood and hobbled over to Rachel. "That's better. Now, why don't you like me?"
"Cause my mommy said you were bad." He said solemnly.
"Sweetie, I'm not bad. Your mommy was very mad at me for a while, but I'm not bad. I love your mommy and daddy very very much." She said as she lifted him onto her lap. "I know you don't know me very well, and that's my fault, but I love you sweetie. I am not bad." She smiled. He looked at her and smiled a little.
"Weally?"
"Yes."
"Can I have ice cream?"
Rachel looked at him, then the clock.
"At 8:00 in that morning? I think not." She smiled as she tickled him. "Okay. Well, go watch your movie while I look at the paper."
"Hey, ant Wachel? Are you friends with my onkle Woss?"
"Yea." She paused. "Yea I guess I am."
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Monica had been admitted. She is two weeks early, but her baby wants out now. Chandler came by to pick up Josh and take him to Monica at the hospital, so Rachel went back to Joey and Phoebe's apartment. She had circled three apartments, and looked at one. It was nice, small, but nice. It would be a fresh new start. She went into the living room and turned on the TV.
Rachel was deep into 'Green Acres' (The only thing that was on) when the front door opened. It was Ross. She looked up at him, but then quickly back to the TV.
"Hey." He greeted.
"Hi." She smiled back.
"So, how are you?"
"Fine, I guess" She shrugged. "You?"
"I'm okay. I've just been, uh, thinking a lot the last day or two, about all this old stuff. Remember how I had that uh, thing for Princess Leia?" He asked. She hadn't thought of that in a long time.
"Yea. Sure I do. How's Mona?" She asked, changing the subject.
"She's fine. She's sad that she's going to miss seeing Monica have the baby, so she's trying to get back here as soon as possible."
"Great." Rachel stood. He could sense a bit of emotion in that 'Great.'
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
"Uh, Rach, I have a question. I can't help but wonder it for the past few years. Do you think, if the whole break thing never happened, that we would have lasted?" He asked slowly.
"Yes."
"Really?" He was taken aback with her answer. "I didn't think you felt the same."
"I do. I think about it everyday, Ross." She said, her eyes filling.
I'm thinking of you
In my sleepless solitude tonight
If it's wrong to love you
Then my heart just won't let me be right
Cause I'm drowned in you
And I won't pull through
Without you by my side.
Rachel leaned in and kissed his lips. He just stared at her for a long while. Both of their hearts were beating. She looked into his eyes.
I'd give my all
To have
Just one more night with you
I'd risk my life
To feel
You body next to mine
Cause I can't go on
Living in the memory of our song
I'd give my all
For your love
Tonight...
Ross continued to stare, but after a while, he leaned back in and kissed her back. She was caught off guard, not expecting to be welcomed where he was concerned, but it was as if it was something they needed to do, unfinished business.
Baby, can you feel me
Imagining I'm looking in your eyes
I can see you clearly
Vividly emblazoned in my mind
And yet you're so far
Like a distant star
I'm wishing on tonight
Rachel wrapped her arms lovingly around his neck, pulling his closer to her. Ross suddenly snapped into realization.
"Mona." He whispered. "I can't do this to Mona."
I'd give my all
To have just one more night with you
I'd risk my life
To feel your body next to mine
'Cause I can't go on
Rachel suddenly looked very sad.
"Rachel, I've already done this once and lost the love of my life, I don't want to screw up again."
Living in the memory of our song
I'd give my all
For your love tonight
I'd give my all
To have just one more night with you
I'd risk my life
To feel your body next to mine
'Cause I can't go on
Living in the memory of our song
I'd give my all
For your love tonight
"But Ross, I'm right here." She smiled. "You didn't lose me."
Give my all for your love
Tonight
"And, Ross, I have a confession." Rachel said, her face close to his, both closing their eyes.
"Uh-uh?" He said a bit out of it.
"I think I love you still." She whispered. Ross' eyes opened quickly and he moved away.
"Wha-what?"
"I do, I still love you."
"Oh?"
"Yes!" She said a bit irritated. He smiled, but the smile faded as his cell phone rang.
"Hello?... Yea....Is she okay?... Good... Mona's there? Already?... Okay, we'll be right there." With that, he flipped the top of his cell phone shut and looked over at Rachel. "Mona's here. And, I love her rach. I do, I love her a lot. It took a long time for me to get over you, and I don't think I want to try again if we don't work out."
"But we will..."
"How do you know?" He said, his eyes filled with tears. "You were supposed to be the one I spent my entire life with..."
"And whose fault is that?" She asked defensively. He looked down.
"I can't do it Rachel, Not again." He looked at her. "You disappeared out of my life for four years, and then returned expecting me to drop everything and move on with OUR relationship. Well, it won't work this time. It may have worked with Julie, but it's not working with Mona."
"Okay." She said nodding. "Let's get down to the hospital."
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Rachel walked over to greet Phoebe and Joey and Chandler, as Ross ran to greet Mona. Mona smiled at Rachel, who smiled back, fighting off the urge to roll her eyes. Rachel felt a little hand in hers. She looked down to see Josh, and hest to him Sandi, both leading her to to waiting room. She followed and sat on the couch.
"Yes?" She asked. Sandi, being older, spoke first.
"Josh said you're my aunt Rachel." She smiled.
"I am, that's true."
"Well, you gotta promise that you won't leave 'gain cuz mommy said that's why we just met you now."
Rachel looked over at Ross and Mona, who were laughing and smiling together. A sudden rush of feeling came over her. She looked at the little pair of pleading eyes staring at her.
"Okay, I promise."
XOXOElizabethXOXO
Rachel awoke again on the small, four-foot bed she had fallen asleep on. She felt so much better that she had gotten to tell him that she forgave him. She wondered if things were going to be normal again soon. She was so tired of running. It was time to settle down. She took a shower and got dressed. It was still early, 7:45 am, so she decided to go to Monica's and say hi.
As soon as she entered Monica's, pancakes filled her nose. Of course, Monica was cooking, Josh was sitting on his daddy's lap, and Ross was at the table talking to Monica. Rachel smiled uncomfortably and walked toward Monica.
"Hey Mon, morning."
"Hi. Do you want one or two?" Monica asked not paying attention.
"Oh, none. I'm not hungry. Ahem. So, what are you doing today?"
"Waiting to pop." Monica joked, gesturing towards her stomach. Rachel laughed. Chandler stood up and walked over to Monica.
"Uh, Mon, we have to get to your gyno appointment." He said checking his watch. Monica turned off the stove and went over to her purse.
"Rachel, what are you doing today?"
"I'm just checking listings for an apartment. Why?"
"Can you watch Josh for a few?" Monica asked pleadingly. "I need this THING out of me."
"Yea. Go ahead. Do you have the Sunday paper?"
"Uh huh. On the table. I'll see you later. Bye Josh, mommy loves you." Monica waved to her son and she and Chandler exited. Rachel turned around slowly, and saw Ross was still there. He was drinking a coffee, looking at the paper. She needed the apartment section, but she didn't want to ask him for it. She walked into the living room and sat next to Josh who was staring at her with a Monica glare.
"What?" Rachel asked a bit annoyed.
"Where's my mom?" He asked in a mean tone. Rachel laughed a bit. For being a brat, he was still a cutie.
"She's getting her tummy checked out by the doctors." She said as she began to straighten up the living room. There wasn't really anything to clean, but she thought she might as well get whatever she could pick up.
"Who are YOU?" He asked in the same tone.
"I'm your aunt Rachel." Rachel said happily. The little boy simply shook his head.
"No. I ondly gots two ants. Ant Feeby and ant Ross." Rachel looked at the little boy and laughed again.
"I think you mean UNCLE Ross." She corrected. Ross' head popped up reacting to hearing his name.
"What?" He asked.
"Nothing. I was just explaining to Josh that you were his Uncle and not his Aunt." She smiled.
"Right." He said nodding. He averted his eyes back to the newspaper. Rachel walked slowly over to the kitchen. She looked back to see that Josh was glued to the TV. She looked back over at Ross. Rachel sat down across from him at the table.
"So." She sighed.
"Yea?" Ross asked, not looking off of the paper.
"How are you?" She asked. She didn't know why they were acting so weird towards each other. Ross wouldn't look her in the eyes.
"Fine." He said. He looked down at his watch, and then he stood. "I uh, I have to go to work." He quickly took his briefcase and left. Rachel put her head in her hands and sighed another sigh. She thought the awkwardness would be over by now. She looked back over at Josh. His eyes peeking over the couch. She smiled, but he looked away.
"Josh, come here." Rachel said standing. The little boy shook his head. "Josh, It's ok. I won't bite. Just come here, I want to talk to you." Reluctantly, the Josh stood and hobbled over to Rachel. "That's better. Now, why don't you like me?"
"Cause my mommy said you were bad." He said solemnly.
"Sweetie, I'm not bad. Your mommy was very mad at me for a while, but I'm not bad. I love your mommy and daddy very very much." She said as she lifted him onto her lap. "I know you don't know me very well, and that's my fault, but I love you sweetie. I am not bad." She smiled. He looked at her and smiled a little.
"Weally?"
"Yes."
"Can I have ice cream?"
Rachel looked at him, then the clock.
"At 8:00 in that morning? I think not." She smiled as she tickled him. "Okay. Well, go watch your movie while I look at the paper."
"Hey, ant Wachel? Are you friends with my onkle Woss?"
"Yea." She paused. "Yea I guess I am."
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Monica had been admitted. She is two weeks early, but her baby wants out now. Chandler came by to pick up Josh and take him to Monica at the hospital, so Rachel went back to Joey and Phoebe's apartment. She had circled three apartments, and looked at one. It was nice, small, but nice. It would be a fresh new start. She went into the living room and turned on the TV.
Rachel was deep into 'Green Acres' (The only thing that was on) when the front door opened. It was Ross. She looked up at him, but then quickly back to the TV.
"Hey." He greeted.
"Hi." She smiled back.
"So, how are you?"
"Fine, I guess" She shrugged. "You?"
"I'm okay. I've just been, uh, thinking a lot the last day or two, about all this old stuff. Remember how I had that uh, thing for Princess Leia?" He asked. She hadn't thought of that in a long time.
"Yea. Sure I do. How's Mona?" She asked, changing the subject.
"She's fine. She's sad that she's going to miss seeing Monica have the baby, so she's trying to get back here as soon as possible."
"Great." Rachel stood. He could sense a bit of emotion in that 'Great.'
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
"Uh, Rach, I have a question. I can't help but wonder it for the past few years. Do you think, if the whole break thing never happened, that we would have lasted?" He asked slowly.
"Yes."
"Really?" He was taken aback with her answer. "I didn't think you felt the same."
"I do. I think about it everyday, Ross." She said, her eyes filling.
I'm thinking of you
In my sleepless solitude tonight
If it's wrong to love you
Then my heart just won't let me be right
Cause I'm drowned in you
And I won't pull through
Without you by my side.
Rachel leaned in and kissed his lips. He just stared at her for a long while. Both of their hearts were beating. She looked into his eyes.
I'd give my all
To have
Just one more night with you
I'd risk my life
To feel
You body next to mine
Cause I can't go on
Living in the memory of our song
I'd give my all
For your love
Tonight...
Ross continued to stare, but after a while, he leaned back in and kissed her back. She was caught off guard, not expecting to be welcomed where he was concerned, but it was as if it was something they needed to do, unfinished business.
Baby, can you feel me
Imagining I'm looking in your eyes
I can see you clearly
Vividly emblazoned in my mind
And yet you're so far
Like a distant star
I'm wishing on tonight
Rachel wrapped her arms lovingly around his neck, pulling his closer to her. Ross suddenly snapped into realization.
"Mona." He whispered. "I can't do this to Mona."
I'd give my all
To have just one more night with you
I'd risk my life
To feel your body next to mine
'Cause I can't go on
Rachel suddenly looked very sad.
"Rachel, I've already done this once and lost the love of my life, I don't want to screw up again."
Living in the memory of our song
I'd give my all
For your love tonight
I'd give my all
To have just one more night with you
I'd risk my life
To feel your body next to mine
'Cause I can't go on
Living in the memory of our song
I'd give my all
For your love tonight
"But Ross, I'm right here." She smiled. "You didn't lose me."
Give my all for your love
Tonight
"And, Ross, I have a confession." Rachel said, her face close to his, both closing their eyes.
"Uh-uh?" He said a bit out of it.
"I think I love you still." She whispered. Ross' eyes opened quickly and he moved away.
"Wha-what?"
"I do, I still love you."
"Oh?"
"Yes!" She said a bit irritated. He smiled, but the smile faded as his cell phone rang.
"Hello?... Yea....Is she okay?... Good... Mona's there? Already?... Okay, we'll be right there." With that, he flipped the top of his cell phone shut and looked over at Rachel. "Mona's here. And, I love her rach. I do, I love her a lot. It took a long time for me to get over you, and I don't think I want to try again if we don't work out."
"But we will..."
"How do you know?" He said, his eyes filled with tears. "You were supposed to be the one I spent my entire life with..."
"And whose fault is that?" She asked defensively. He looked down.
"I can't do it Rachel, Not again." He looked at her. "You disappeared out of my life for four years, and then returned expecting me to drop everything and move on with OUR relationship. Well, it won't work this time. It may have worked with Julie, but it's not working with Mona."
"Okay." She said nodding. "Let's get down to the hospital."
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Rachel walked over to greet Phoebe and Joey and Chandler, as Ross ran to greet Mona. Mona smiled at Rachel, who smiled back, fighting off the urge to roll her eyes. Rachel felt a little hand in hers. She looked down to see Josh, and hest to him Sandi, both leading her to to waiting room. She followed and sat on the couch.
"Yes?" She asked. Sandi, being older, spoke first.
"Josh said you're my aunt Rachel." She smiled.
"I am, that's true."
"Well, you gotta promise that you won't leave 'gain cuz mommy said that's why we just met you now."
Rachel looked over at Ross and Mona, who were laughing and smiling together. A sudden rush of feeling came over her. She looked at the little pair of pleading eyes staring at her.
"Okay, I promise."
XOXOElizabethXOXO