Chapter 10: Plans
"Summers!"
Dawn turned around to see the person who was calling her name. She smiled when she saw who it was. His name was Chad Johnson, and he sat next to her in English. He ran up to her hurriedly.
"What's up Chad?" Dawn asked, seeing he held a test they just got back in his hand. She gestured to it and asked, "How'd you do?"
He rolled his eyes and told her, "I hate this class." He smiled, dismissing the subject totally and then asked, "So, you have a date to the Winter Formal yet?" He scratched the back of his head, his eyes glancing away from hers.
*Me! He's asking me to the Formal!* Dawn thought with excitement. The dance was already just two weeks away. She smiled right back at him and said, "Nope."
"Well I was wondering if... I mean, I don't have a date yet either..." The words just weren't coming out of his mouth. He quickly regrouped and blurted out, "Will you go to the dance with me?"
Dawn was all smiles as she said, "Sure."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Buffy sat at her desk, twirling a pencil in her hand. It was so boring here. At least, today was. Kids were being sent to her off and on, but no real news. There were just the usual problems. It was so boring she actually wished she were in class. At least there would be a monotone teacher's voice that could put her to sleep.
"Buffy!" Dawn burst through the door and into her cubicle.
"Aren't you supposed to be in class?" Buffy asked.
"I still have five minutes. I just wanted to come by and tell you that I have a date to the Formal!"
Buffy felt herself ease into legal-guardian mode. "Okay, now you have to tell me his name, first and last, where he lives, and how old he is," she said half-serious and half-kidding. "I need to do a background check so I know he's normal and not all demon-y."
Dawn's jaw dropped. She had to be kidding.
Buffy let out a laugh. "I'm not completely serious. I want a name and age."
"Chad Johnson, and he's fifteen," Dawn replied. "He's in my English class, third period."
Her sister smirked.
"Don't give me that look, Buffy. *Do not* go all stalker-protective sister on me. He's a perfectly normal, and perfectly cute guy. I swear, if you mess this up for me..." Dawn warned. She stood up. "I have to get to class. I'll see you after school."
Buffy shook her head as her sister walked out. Dawn was definitely growing up.
"I couldn't help but overhearing your sister's excitement." Principal Wood was standing at the end of her cubicle. "Date for the Formal, right?"
"Yeah. It begins, the evolution of my little sister into a teenage horror," Buffy said, chuckling to herself. "Everyone is so excited about this dance. That's what everyone's coming to me about today- advice on how to ask someone to the dance. I never realized that it was so hard."
"You can't tell me you haven't had your own issues with asking someone out when you were in high school," the principal said.
That was definitely the biggest understatement of the year. "Oh, I had issues all right," was her response to Principal Wood's comment. "It's just a dance anyway. Who would have thought asking someone would be the hardest part?"
He shook his head, laughing softly. "You're quite a character Miss Summers. Speaking of the dance, though, can I count on you coming? As a chaperone of course."
A chaperone? He had to be kidding. She looked like she was still young enough to be a student *going* to the dance. Is this what her life has succumbed to already? Hanging out with the teachers and administration at a high school dance? She answered him with, "I don't know. I think my sister will think I'm spying on her."
"Don't worry about her. Bring a date, it'll be fun," he told her. "So you won't have to hang out with us old farts. Besides, the kids will probably be more comfortable if you're there as well, rather than just the... Oh, what was it that I overheard someone say? Oh yes, the 'stick-up-the-ass' administration."
Buffy laughed at his comment. "I'll think about it," was her final answer.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"Oh no... What are we going to do?" Willow mused at Buffy's news.
"I don't know. This is such a big deal," Buffy said. "Where was I?"
"I know the remedy," Cordelia said happily, a smile flashing across her face.
Angel walked into the living room just then. He saw the concerned looks among the ladies' faces and automatically got worried. "What's up? Did you guys find out something important?" he asked with a voice full of concern.
"It's Dawn," Willow said.
Angel looked at Buffy, who was just staring into space at the moment. "Buffy. Are you alright? What happened to her?"
"She got a date for the Winter Formal," Buffy simply said.
"Dawnie's got a date," Willow repeated happily.
Cordelia was quite happy. "You need to take that girl shopping! She needs a dress, and jewelry, and matching shoes... Oh, and a nail appointment, and I can do her makeup...!" She was definitely going on a tangent.
Angel was confused. These girls were amazing, fussing over the most ridiculous things.
Willow put a reassuring hand on Buffy's shoulder. "Oh Buff. You're just overreacting. Remember when we were in high school? And all the issues with boys, and dances, and..." High school years went into focus for her, and she remembered how less-than-normal they were. "I mean, we went through the same things... kind of."
"Oh yeah, Willow. Like the vampires who would occasionally kidnap us, and the demons that would love to make our school a home?" Cordelia said sarcastically. "Please, what's the big deal anyway? Your sister got a date for the dance! Be happy! Stop being a mother-figure for once and be a big sister."
"As much as I hate to say it, Cordy has a point," Willow said.
Buffy sighed and shrugged. "That's not the only thing. Principal Wood asked me if I'd go to the dance and help chaperone. Have I really turned into one of those geeky parents?" she asked.
"Now *that's* a whole different story," Cordelia told Buffy.
"So are you gonna go?" Willow asked. "I mean, I think it would be a great idea, since the school's all Hellmouth-y, and it's gonna be at night and all."
Buffy's mind was still on the chaperone thing. "He told me to bring a date," she said.
"Oh," was Willow's response. "Then bring a date."
"Who would I bring? You know my track record with guys has been..." she looked over at Cordelia and Angel, knowing she couldn't say anything too revealing, "less than normal."
"Why are you guys making such a big deal about this?" Angel asked, not comprehending this whole conversation.
Cordelia rolled her eyes. "You know the whole issue about parents and kids going out on dates. I mean, Buffy's like a mom to Dawn, you know? How would *you* feel if Connor decided to go out on a date?"
"He doesn't understand the concept of dating yet, nor will he... Until I say so, of course," Angel stated.
"And *that*," Cordelia stated, "proves my point."
"You're worse than I am," Buffy muttered, and then smiled. "But Angel has a point too. We've got more important things to worry about."
"Yeah, like getting you a date," Willow said, trying to keep the latter, upbeat conversation.
Cordelia knew she was going to kick her own butt for the suggestion she was going to pull, but it was the only one that made sense. She looked over at Angel and said, "Why don't *you* go with her? It makes sense, since the school's on Hellmouth Central. If anything happens, what two better people to have there?"
Buffy wanted to protest, but the girl had a point. It was a rather good point at that, but it was Angel. Buffy wasn't so sure it was a great idea- them... being together... at a dance.
Angel wasn't sure about the idea either. He hadn't fought by her side in quite a long time. Then again, he hadn't been on a *date* with Buffy for a long time. He went to her prom, and it wasn't all "happy times" back then. He was going to leave her, which he eventually did.
"She's right," Angel agreed and nodded his head. "We should keep an eye out. If it's okay with you, Buffy, I'd like to be your date." He flashed a smile in a half-hearted attempt to ease the situation.
Now Buffy was completely unsure. Angel... date... dance. That equation wasn't going to work, in her mind at least. Then again, he *was* the best person to bring along, since Spike was (hopefully) temporarily incapacitated. Any big event at Sunnydale High was always accompanied with some supernatural activity. So Buffy let out a long breath and agreed to the idea, "Sure."
Willow gave Buffy an "are you absolutely sure?" look.
"Hey, it's okay. Problem fixed," Buffy said. "I not only have a date, I have a partner... just in case." She sounded just a little disappointed.
Cordelia noticed Buffy's detachment from the idea of going with Angel. She looked at Buffy sideways and said, "You don't sound too excited about it. You actually look like you'd like to bring someone else."
Buffy looked at Cordelia, wide-eyed, and almost innocently. Did she really look like that? "What do you mean? I had no one else in mind... really. You know me, I have this thing with dating less-than-normal guys, and... um... well, I haven't been in the dating pool for a while," she said, not sure if her words were convincing.
Just then, the front door opened. Xander, Gunn, and Fred walked in.
"So, what are we doing tonight, kids?" Xander greeted, a smile on his face. "Is it going to be another night of research-filled fun?"
"I don't know about you guys, but this nightly research thing is getting too stressful, and to be quite honest, it's going absolutely nowhere. I mean has Anya had some breakthrough with the translating of the prophecy? I need a break already!" Cordelia complained, and sat back on the couch.
"I second that motion," Gunn said, raising his hand. "What's there to do in this town?"
"About the only nightlife in this town is The Bronze," Willow said.
"That place is still around?" Angel asked.
"Yup. It's reopened and revamped... Well, not revamped in the literal sense," Willow said, smiling. "It's still the cool hangout in Sunnydale."
"So who's in for The Bronze tonight?" Xander asked cheerily.
There were nods from everyone.
"What about Dawn and Connor?" Fred asked.
Buffy and Angel looked at each other. Buffy shrugged. "Well, if Dawn's good with her homework, I don't mind her coming with."
Angel shrugged after Buffy's decision. "Connor can come along. He can man his own if anything happens."
"Finally a break from all this!" Cordelia exclaimed and stood up. "Well until then, I'm going to get some beauty rest." She left the group of people and headed upstairs.
Buffy looked at Willow and said, "This should be an interesting night."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Spike stood outside of Buffy's house, leaning against the tree he usually occupied. He saw her inside, sitting on the couch with Willow. They were talking, about what, he didn't know. He was perfectly content watching her. Every now and then, she would crack that irresistible smile that turned him to mush on many occasions. Xander would enter the room occasionally, probably saying something completely idiotic, but that was Xander nonetheless. The Lil' Bit would run into the living room sometimes too, hangers of clothes in her hands, probably asking Buffy if an outfit looked good. It saddened him to be outside and looking in, when he wished he were there inside with them, enjoying whatever conversation they were having.
His eyes were fixated on Buffy. He imagined running his fingers through her silky blonde hair, and looking into those green eyes. He wanted to caress her face gently, with the back of his hand, and feel her warm skin against his. If only... if only. Buffy had already made him crazy, before he got the voices in his head.
What he saw next was unexpected. The person who walked into the living room was the last person he expected to see... ever again. What was Angel doing in Buffy's house? Let alone, Sunnydale? He stood up straight and watched carefully.
Angel sat down on the couch next to Buffy, and they were talking. He had no way of knowing what they were talking about, but it looked important, because Buffy didn't smile once. At one point, she actually looked like she was going defensive on Angel. In the midst of their conversation, another familiar face walked into the room. It was Cordelia. Then three others came in to join them.
It was the Poofter Squad. What were they doing here? Spike was interested to know why they were there. He doubted that it was a just a visit.
"They'll find out soon enough," a voice said behind him. He turned around to find Tara, or who he thought was Tara. An apparition maybe. She stood there, looking at him. She looked like she had all the wisdom in the world. She looked over to the window and said, "They think they can stop it. They don't even know where to begin."
"Are you..."
"Don't be silly. I'm not a ghost," she told him. "I'm here to help you, I suppose. You're supposed to be helping them in there you know. You're just as important in the game as they are."
Spike was lost. He was probably hallucinating. It was another figment his unstable mind was thinking up. He blinked, thinking the figure would just go away.
"I'm here to help. Don't forget that," she said, smiling. Then she backed away into the dark and was gone.
He squinted a little, trying to find a trace of her, but there was none. So he looked back to the window, where he watched what was going on inside.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"Who's Spike?" Fred asked innocently.
Buffy and Angel looked up from their conversation. They were talking about Spike, of course. Angel kept asking Buffy where he was. Buffy kept giving him diverting answers.
"Do we have to go through this again?" Buffy asked, seemingly annoyed.
"Let me put this into perspective for everyone," Xander said. "Angel was Spike's Sire. Yadda, yadda. Spike was on a kick to kill Buffy when he first came here. Yadda, yadda. Angel went bad, Spike *helped* Buffy get to evil Angel, and then he left. Came back again, whining about his insane ex..." He noticed the annoyed and uncomfortable look on Cordelia's face. That was a day no one wanted to remember. Then he continued his story, "Couple months later, he came back looking for the Ring of Amarra..."
"Yeah, and then came to LA and almost got Angel killed," Cordelia said.
"Can I finish my story please?" Xander asked, annoyed. Cordelia waved her hand to continue. "Thank you. Well, then after that whole incident, Riley and the Initiative chipped Deadboy Jr. and he couldn't hurt any living things, just demons. Next thing we know, he's making googly-eyes at Buffy here, saying he's in love with her..."
Cordelia let out a laugh. "You're kidding right? Spike? In love with Buffy? Oh this is just amusing! Are the only guys you attract, dead?" she asked Buffy, laughing uncontrollably.
"I think I speak for everyone when I say, *shut up* Cordy," Xander said. There was only a brief pause, then he continued, "But that doesn't matter... the whole googly-eyes part. He ended up being, as much as I hate to admit it, a great ally. Though he's still a pain in the ass, and I'd still really love to stake him." He looked at Buffy, a stone-cold look in his eyes.
Willow jumped into the story. "He's not such a bad guy. I mean, Glory *tortured* him, and he still wouldn't give up that Dawn was the Key. Then he went out on a limb and helped us with the whole stopping of the, like sixth apocalypse and stuff. And... he kept a watch of Dawn when Buffy was... not here," she explained reasonably.
Angel was giving Buffy a "how come you never told me any of this?" look. Buffy just kept on looking at him innocently. She didn't feel that she had a right to tell him, or that he even had a right to know. He was the one who walked out of Sunnydale.
"So wait a minute, this Spike guy... is he good or bad then?" Gunn asked.
It was Buffy's turn to speak. "Good... in a bad way," she said, unsurely. "I mean, he helps out a lot... He's annoying... but..."
Xander was giving her almost a menacing look.
"I'm going to shut up now. Spike is Spike. There's your explanation. No one ever knows what's going on in the inner workings of his mind," she finally said.
"So, wait a minute," Fred started, "Spike... is in love with Buffy, right? But Angel, I thought you and Buffy were..."
"Over," Buffy said quickly. "Like three years ago over. Kind of got the message that us, having a relationship and all, not going to work. And please, let's *not* talk about Spike being... *in love* with me."
Angel looked a Buffy. He still loved her, of course. He would never stop loving her, but they had no future together. He couldn't ever love her like she deserved to be loved. She deserved more than just him.
"I agree with Buffy," Angel said. "We've got the history on Spike. That's all we need to know, really. Where is he though? You still have to tell me that much, Buffy." He was looking dead at her.
"He's living in the high school basement, busy being all insane and nutty," Xander said. "He left before the summer, don't know where he went, next thing we know, he's back, and he's off his rocker."
"This Spike-centered conversation is getting aggravating. Let's just say he messed up all our lives, greatly. Can we go to The Bronze now?" Cordelia asked, getting impatient. She was tapping her foot on the floor.
"For once, she has a point," Xander said, pointing his finger at her. "Let's just go, and *not* talk about the annoying vampire anymore." He turned around and started heading to the door, the others following him after a moment.
Buffy grabbed her purse and started following the crowd. Angel stopped her before she could get to the door. He grabbed her arm. "What?" she asked, snapping around.
"There's more to you and Spike," he told her seriously. "I don't know what you're not telling me, but there's more. Why won't you let me in?"
"It's none of your business, Angel. You haven't been here in, what? Three years? Now suddenly you make an appearance out of nowhere and you expect me to be all open arms with you? Let me tell you something, it doesn't work that way," she spat at him. "If there was anything going on between Spike and I, *you* wouldn't be the first to know. All you need to know is that I moved on with my life... Without you in it."
Angel was speechless. He didn't know what to say. He saw it with his own eyes. Spike and Buffy. Talking, he expressed his love to her, how he got his soul for her. His expression grew somber at the thought and said, "There was once I time when you would tell me everything."
She smiled, sighed, and said, "We're friends. You and me. We'll never be as close as we once were. There was a time, where... it was so apparent that we just couldn't be friends. God, we loved each other so much. But it's over, Angel, please accept that." When he didn't say anything she told him, "When I told you... that I would start forgetting, you knew, and I knew we'd never forget. No matter how long we were apart, there's no forgetting. But there's moving, and that's what I did."
The flashes going through his mind were unbearable. He wished she had those memories of them being together. He was human, and happy. He was able to be with her, and make her happy. He got to see the sun rise with her, and they were able to walk in the daylight, holding each other. But it was hopeless, she'd never remember. He let go of her arm. "I'm sorry, Buffy. You're right," he told her.
She smiled at him, nodded, and followed the others out of the house.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
When the others emerged from the house, Spike hid himself in the shadows, being careful not to let them see him. He heard someone say they were all going to The Bronze. Spike looked into the window again to find Buffy and Angel engaged in, what looked like, a serious talk. He had her arm, and she was talking to him, a hint of anger in her expression.
He should have been in there, to lead Buffy out and away from Angel. What was it with the Poof? Did he have to have every lady Spike ever loved? If he were feeling a little stronger, he'd give Angel a mouthful. But the fact was, he wasn't strong enough yet. Hell, he wasn't even strong enough or had the courage enough to see Buffy on his own. He was back to just watching her from afar, or letting her come to him.
But whenever she spoke to him, everything that would come out of his mouth didn't make sense. He couldn't form sentences when she was around. She made him go crazy. He couldn't be with her, and he couldn't be without her. It was a horrible cycle.
He yearned so much to be what she wanted. She deserved so much better. This soul wasn't enough, it would never be enough. If he could, he would give her the world. If he could, he wouldn't have to be fighting these monsters within himself anymore. If he could, he'd be a man.
As Buffy and Angel walked out of the house, Spike sank back deep into the shadows of the night.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
To be continued...
Ah! So the brain is beginning to process ideas of Spuffyness again! =) R&R please! More coming soon!
"Summers!"
Dawn turned around to see the person who was calling her name. She smiled when she saw who it was. His name was Chad Johnson, and he sat next to her in English. He ran up to her hurriedly.
"What's up Chad?" Dawn asked, seeing he held a test they just got back in his hand. She gestured to it and asked, "How'd you do?"
He rolled his eyes and told her, "I hate this class." He smiled, dismissing the subject totally and then asked, "So, you have a date to the Winter Formal yet?" He scratched the back of his head, his eyes glancing away from hers.
*Me! He's asking me to the Formal!* Dawn thought with excitement. The dance was already just two weeks away. She smiled right back at him and said, "Nope."
"Well I was wondering if... I mean, I don't have a date yet either..." The words just weren't coming out of his mouth. He quickly regrouped and blurted out, "Will you go to the dance with me?"
Dawn was all smiles as she said, "Sure."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Buffy sat at her desk, twirling a pencil in her hand. It was so boring here. At least, today was. Kids were being sent to her off and on, but no real news. There were just the usual problems. It was so boring she actually wished she were in class. At least there would be a monotone teacher's voice that could put her to sleep.
"Buffy!" Dawn burst through the door and into her cubicle.
"Aren't you supposed to be in class?" Buffy asked.
"I still have five minutes. I just wanted to come by and tell you that I have a date to the Formal!"
Buffy felt herself ease into legal-guardian mode. "Okay, now you have to tell me his name, first and last, where he lives, and how old he is," she said half-serious and half-kidding. "I need to do a background check so I know he's normal and not all demon-y."
Dawn's jaw dropped. She had to be kidding.
Buffy let out a laugh. "I'm not completely serious. I want a name and age."
"Chad Johnson, and he's fifteen," Dawn replied. "He's in my English class, third period."
Her sister smirked.
"Don't give me that look, Buffy. *Do not* go all stalker-protective sister on me. He's a perfectly normal, and perfectly cute guy. I swear, if you mess this up for me..." Dawn warned. She stood up. "I have to get to class. I'll see you after school."
Buffy shook her head as her sister walked out. Dawn was definitely growing up.
"I couldn't help but overhearing your sister's excitement." Principal Wood was standing at the end of her cubicle. "Date for the Formal, right?"
"Yeah. It begins, the evolution of my little sister into a teenage horror," Buffy said, chuckling to herself. "Everyone is so excited about this dance. That's what everyone's coming to me about today- advice on how to ask someone to the dance. I never realized that it was so hard."
"You can't tell me you haven't had your own issues with asking someone out when you were in high school," the principal said.
That was definitely the biggest understatement of the year. "Oh, I had issues all right," was her response to Principal Wood's comment. "It's just a dance anyway. Who would have thought asking someone would be the hardest part?"
He shook his head, laughing softly. "You're quite a character Miss Summers. Speaking of the dance, though, can I count on you coming? As a chaperone of course."
A chaperone? He had to be kidding. She looked like she was still young enough to be a student *going* to the dance. Is this what her life has succumbed to already? Hanging out with the teachers and administration at a high school dance? She answered him with, "I don't know. I think my sister will think I'm spying on her."
"Don't worry about her. Bring a date, it'll be fun," he told her. "So you won't have to hang out with us old farts. Besides, the kids will probably be more comfortable if you're there as well, rather than just the... Oh, what was it that I overheard someone say? Oh yes, the 'stick-up-the-ass' administration."
Buffy laughed at his comment. "I'll think about it," was her final answer.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"Oh no... What are we going to do?" Willow mused at Buffy's news.
"I don't know. This is such a big deal," Buffy said. "Where was I?"
"I know the remedy," Cordelia said happily, a smile flashing across her face.
Angel walked into the living room just then. He saw the concerned looks among the ladies' faces and automatically got worried. "What's up? Did you guys find out something important?" he asked with a voice full of concern.
"It's Dawn," Willow said.
Angel looked at Buffy, who was just staring into space at the moment. "Buffy. Are you alright? What happened to her?"
"She got a date for the Winter Formal," Buffy simply said.
"Dawnie's got a date," Willow repeated happily.
Cordelia was quite happy. "You need to take that girl shopping! She needs a dress, and jewelry, and matching shoes... Oh, and a nail appointment, and I can do her makeup...!" She was definitely going on a tangent.
Angel was confused. These girls were amazing, fussing over the most ridiculous things.
Willow put a reassuring hand on Buffy's shoulder. "Oh Buff. You're just overreacting. Remember when we were in high school? And all the issues with boys, and dances, and..." High school years went into focus for her, and she remembered how less-than-normal they were. "I mean, we went through the same things... kind of."
"Oh yeah, Willow. Like the vampires who would occasionally kidnap us, and the demons that would love to make our school a home?" Cordelia said sarcastically. "Please, what's the big deal anyway? Your sister got a date for the dance! Be happy! Stop being a mother-figure for once and be a big sister."
"As much as I hate to say it, Cordy has a point," Willow said.
Buffy sighed and shrugged. "That's not the only thing. Principal Wood asked me if I'd go to the dance and help chaperone. Have I really turned into one of those geeky parents?" she asked.
"Now *that's* a whole different story," Cordelia told Buffy.
"So are you gonna go?" Willow asked. "I mean, I think it would be a great idea, since the school's all Hellmouth-y, and it's gonna be at night and all."
Buffy's mind was still on the chaperone thing. "He told me to bring a date," she said.
"Oh," was Willow's response. "Then bring a date."
"Who would I bring? You know my track record with guys has been..." she looked over at Cordelia and Angel, knowing she couldn't say anything too revealing, "less than normal."
"Why are you guys making such a big deal about this?" Angel asked, not comprehending this whole conversation.
Cordelia rolled her eyes. "You know the whole issue about parents and kids going out on dates. I mean, Buffy's like a mom to Dawn, you know? How would *you* feel if Connor decided to go out on a date?"
"He doesn't understand the concept of dating yet, nor will he... Until I say so, of course," Angel stated.
"And *that*," Cordelia stated, "proves my point."
"You're worse than I am," Buffy muttered, and then smiled. "But Angel has a point too. We've got more important things to worry about."
"Yeah, like getting you a date," Willow said, trying to keep the latter, upbeat conversation.
Cordelia knew she was going to kick her own butt for the suggestion she was going to pull, but it was the only one that made sense. She looked over at Angel and said, "Why don't *you* go with her? It makes sense, since the school's on Hellmouth Central. If anything happens, what two better people to have there?"
Buffy wanted to protest, but the girl had a point. It was a rather good point at that, but it was Angel. Buffy wasn't so sure it was a great idea- them... being together... at a dance.
Angel wasn't sure about the idea either. He hadn't fought by her side in quite a long time. Then again, he hadn't been on a *date* with Buffy for a long time. He went to her prom, and it wasn't all "happy times" back then. He was going to leave her, which he eventually did.
"She's right," Angel agreed and nodded his head. "We should keep an eye out. If it's okay with you, Buffy, I'd like to be your date." He flashed a smile in a half-hearted attempt to ease the situation.
Now Buffy was completely unsure. Angel... date... dance. That equation wasn't going to work, in her mind at least. Then again, he *was* the best person to bring along, since Spike was (hopefully) temporarily incapacitated. Any big event at Sunnydale High was always accompanied with some supernatural activity. So Buffy let out a long breath and agreed to the idea, "Sure."
Willow gave Buffy an "are you absolutely sure?" look.
"Hey, it's okay. Problem fixed," Buffy said. "I not only have a date, I have a partner... just in case." She sounded just a little disappointed.
Cordelia noticed Buffy's detachment from the idea of going with Angel. She looked at Buffy sideways and said, "You don't sound too excited about it. You actually look like you'd like to bring someone else."
Buffy looked at Cordelia, wide-eyed, and almost innocently. Did she really look like that? "What do you mean? I had no one else in mind... really. You know me, I have this thing with dating less-than-normal guys, and... um... well, I haven't been in the dating pool for a while," she said, not sure if her words were convincing.
Just then, the front door opened. Xander, Gunn, and Fred walked in.
"So, what are we doing tonight, kids?" Xander greeted, a smile on his face. "Is it going to be another night of research-filled fun?"
"I don't know about you guys, but this nightly research thing is getting too stressful, and to be quite honest, it's going absolutely nowhere. I mean has Anya had some breakthrough with the translating of the prophecy? I need a break already!" Cordelia complained, and sat back on the couch.
"I second that motion," Gunn said, raising his hand. "What's there to do in this town?"
"About the only nightlife in this town is The Bronze," Willow said.
"That place is still around?" Angel asked.
"Yup. It's reopened and revamped... Well, not revamped in the literal sense," Willow said, smiling. "It's still the cool hangout in Sunnydale."
"So who's in for The Bronze tonight?" Xander asked cheerily.
There were nods from everyone.
"What about Dawn and Connor?" Fred asked.
Buffy and Angel looked at each other. Buffy shrugged. "Well, if Dawn's good with her homework, I don't mind her coming with."
Angel shrugged after Buffy's decision. "Connor can come along. He can man his own if anything happens."
"Finally a break from all this!" Cordelia exclaimed and stood up. "Well until then, I'm going to get some beauty rest." She left the group of people and headed upstairs.
Buffy looked at Willow and said, "This should be an interesting night."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Spike stood outside of Buffy's house, leaning against the tree he usually occupied. He saw her inside, sitting on the couch with Willow. They were talking, about what, he didn't know. He was perfectly content watching her. Every now and then, she would crack that irresistible smile that turned him to mush on many occasions. Xander would enter the room occasionally, probably saying something completely idiotic, but that was Xander nonetheless. The Lil' Bit would run into the living room sometimes too, hangers of clothes in her hands, probably asking Buffy if an outfit looked good. It saddened him to be outside and looking in, when he wished he were there inside with them, enjoying whatever conversation they were having.
His eyes were fixated on Buffy. He imagined running his fingers through her silky blonde hair, and looking into those green eyes. He wanted to caress her face gently, with the back of his hand, and feel her warm skin against his. If only... if only. Buffy had already made him crazy, before he got the voices in his head.
What he saw next was unexpected. The person who walked into the living room was the last person he expected to see... ever again. What was Angel doing in Buffy's house? Let alone, Sunnydale? He stood up straight and watched carefully.
Angel sat down on the couch next to Buffy, and they were talking. He had no way of knowing what they were talking about, but it looked important, because Buffy didn't smile once. At one point, she actually looked like she was going defensive on Angel. In the midst of their conversation, another familiar face walked into the room. It was Cordelia. Then three others came in to join them.
It was the Poofter Squad. What were they doing here? Spike was interested to know why they were there. He doubted that it was a just a visit.
"They'll find out soon enough," a voice said behind him. He turned around to find Tara, or who he thought was Tara. An apparition maybe. She stood there, looking at him. She looked like she had all the wisdom in the world. She looked over to the window and said, "They think they can stop it. They don't even know where to begin."
"Are you..."
"Don't be silly. I'm not a ghost," she told him. "I'm here to help you, I suppose. You're supposed to be helping them in there you know. You're just as important in the game as they are."
Spike was lost. He was probably hallucinating. It was another figment his unstable mind was thinking up. He blinked, thinking the figure would just go away.
"I'm here to help. Don't forget that," she said, smiling. Then she backed away into the dark and was gone.
He squinted a little, trying to find a trace of her, but there was none. So he looked back to the window, where he watched what was going on inside.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"Who's Spike?" Fred asked innocently.
Buffy and Angel looked up from their conversation. They were talking about Spike, of course. Angel kept asking Buffy where he was. Buffy kept giving him diverting answers.
"Do we have to go through this again?" Buffy asked, seemingly annoyed.
"Let me put this into perspective for everyone," Xander said. "Angel was Spike's Sire. Yadda, yadda. Spike was on a kick to kill Buffy when he first came here. Yadda, yadda. Angel went bad, Spike *helped* Buffy get to evil Angel, and then he left. Came back again, whining about his insane ex..." He noticed the annoyed and uncomfortable look on Cordelia's face. That was a day no one wanted to remember. Then he continued his story, "Couple months later, he came back looking for the Ring of Amarra..."
"Yeah, and then came to LA and almost got Angel killed," Cordelia said.
"Can I finish my story please?" Xander asked, annoyed. Cordelia waved her hand to continue. "Thank you. Well, then after that whole incident, Riley and the Initiative chipped Deadboy Jr. and he couldn't hurt any living things, just demons. Next thing we know, he's making googly-eyes at Buffy here, saying he's in love with her..."
Cordelia let out a laugh. "You're kidding right? Spike? In love with Buffy? Oh this is just amusing! Are the only guys you attract, dead?" she asked Buffy, laughing uncontrollably.
"I think I speak for everyone when I say, *shut up* Cordy," Xander said. There was only a brief pause, then he continued, "But that doesn't matter... the whole googly-eyes part. He ended up being, as much as I hate to admit it, a great ally. Though he's still a pain in the ass, and I'd still really love to stake him." He looked at Buffy, a stone-cold look in his eyes.
Willow jumped into the story. "He's not such a bad guy. I mean, Glory *tortured* him, and he still wouldn't give up that Dawn was the Key. Then he went out on a limb and helped us with the whole stopping of the, like sixth apocalypse and stuff. And... he kept a watch of Dawn when Buffy was... not here," she explained reasonably.
Angel was giving Buffy a "how come you never told me any of this?" look. Buffy just kept on looking at him innocently. She didn't feel that she had a right to tell him, or that he even had a right to know. He was the one who walked out of Sunnydale.
"So wait a minute, this Spike guy... is he good or bad then?" Gunn asked.
It was Buffy's turn to speak. "Good... in a bad way," she said, unsurely. "I mean, he helps out a lot... He's annoying... but..."
Xander was giving her almost a menacing look.
"I'm going to shut up now. Spike is Spike. There's your explanation. No one ever knows what's going on in the inner workings of his mind," she finally said.
"So, wait a minute," Fred started, "Spike... is in love with Buffy, right? But Angel, I thought you and Buffy were..."
"Over," Buffy said quickly. "Like three years ago over. Kind of got the message that us, having a relationship and all, not going to work. And please, let's *not* talk about Spike being... *in love* with me."
Angel looked a Buffy. He still loved her, of course. He would never stop loving her, but they had no future together. He couldn't ever love her like she deserved to be loved. She deserved more than just him.
"I agree with Buffy," Angel said. "We've got the history on Spike. That's all we need to know, really. Where is he though? You still have to tell me that much, Buffy." He was looking dead at her.
"He's living in the high school basement, busy being all insane and nutty," Xander said. "He left before the summer, don't know where he went, next thing we know, he's back, and he's off his rocker."
"This Spike-centered conversation is getting aggravating. Let's just say he messed up all our lives, greatly. Can we go to The Bronze now?" Cordelia asked, getting impatient. She was tapping her foot on the floor.
"For once, she has a point," Xander said, pointing his finger at her. "Let's just go, and *not* talk about the annoying vampire anymore." He turned around and started heading to the door, the others following him after a moment.
Buffy grabbed her purse and started following the crowd. Angel stopped her before she could get to the door. He grabbed her arm. "What?" she asked, snapping around.
"There's more to you and Spike," he told her seriously. "I don't know what you're not telling me, but there's more. Why won't you let me in?"
"It's none of your business, Angel. You haven't been here in, what? Three years? Now suddenly you make an appearance out of nowhere and you expect me to be all open arms with you? Let me tell you something, it doesn't work that way," she spat at him. "If there was anything going on between Spike and I, *you* wouldn't be the first to know. All you need to know is that I moved on with my life... Without you in it."
Angel was speechless. He didn't know what to say. He saw it with his own eyes. Spike and Buffy. Talking, he expressed his love to her, how he got his soul for her. His expression grew somber at the thought and said, "There was once I time when you would tell me everything."
She smiled, sighed, and said, "We're friends. You and me. We'll never be as close as we once were. There was a time, where... it was so apparent that we just couldn't be friends. God, we loved each other so much. But it's over, Angel, please accept that." When he didn't say anything she told him, "When I told you... that I would start forgetting, you knew, and I knew we'd never forget. No matter how long we were apart, there's no forgetting. But there's moving, and that's what I did."
The flashes going through his mind were unbearable. He wished she had those memories of them being together. He was human, and happy. He was able to be with her, and make her happy. He got to see the sun rise with her, and they were able to walk in the daylight, holding each other. But it was hopeless, she'd never remember. He let go of her arm. "I'm sorry, Buffy. You're right," he told her.
She smiled at him, nodded, and followed the others out of the house.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
When the others emerged from the house, Spike hid himself in the shadows, being careful not to let them see him. He heard someone say they were all going to The Bronze. Spike looked into the window again to find Buffy and Angel engaged in, what looked like, a serious talk. He had her arm, and she was talking to him, a hint of anger in her expression.
He should have been in there, to lead Buffy out and away from Angel. What was it with the Poof? Did he have to have every lady Spike ever loved? If he were feeling a little stronger, he'd give Angel a mouthful. But the fact was, he wasn't strong enough yet. Hell, he wasn't even strong enough or had the courage enough to see Buffy on his own. He was back to just watching her from afar, or letting her come to him.
But whenever she spoke to him, everything that would come out of his mouth didn't make sense. He couldn't form sentences when she was around. She made him go crazy. He couldn't be with her, and he couldn't be without her. It was a horrible cycle.
He yearned so much to be what she wanted. She deserved so much better. This soul wasn't enough, it would never be enough. If he could, he would give her the world. If he could, he wouldn't have to be fighting these monsters within himself anymore. If he could, he'd be a man.
As Buffy and Angel walked out of the house, Spike sank back deep into the shadows of the night.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
To be continued...
Ah! So the brain is beginning to process ideas of Spuffyness again! =) R&R please! More coming soon!