XIX: No Need for Depression!
Christina Marcella Stohk--or "Ryoko" to a few people--sat quietly on a lawn chair on top of a small hill, basking in the glow of her home world and nursing little Yosho in her arms. The baby was peacefully sleeping, with a cute pacifier in his mouth and a cotton cap over his head. Ryoko couldn't help but love her half-son. Not only was the baby completely adorable and fun to play with, but it was very easy to take care of. It didn't whine or fuss nearly as much as she thought a baby would, and in fact gave her very little grief.
Ever since the baby's birth about a year ago, Ryoko had grown into the habit of taking care of the young boy for her husband and friend. Ayeka had to wean and attend to the infant for the first six months of his life, but more often than not, his was his co-mother Ryoko who played the mother. Tenchi and Ayeka had to admit that having her around was a blessing. Whenever young Yosho woke up in the middle of the night for a feeding or a diaper change, it was usually Ryoko who volunteered to take care of him.
"Oh, it's no problem at all!" she sang to her sleeping loved ones. "I just love taking care of him! Besides, it's not that late at night, and I've got energy to spare! It'll be fine!!!"
"Nnnhhh, thank you," Ayeka had whispered. The princess would then snuggle deeper underneath the covers, next to the man she loved, while Ryoko took care of the kid. It really was a pleasure for the once-vile woman, really it was, and she didn't mind doing half of the work herself.
Ryoko had heavily evolved in the past few years. Almost any inclination that she had once been a wild space pirate was gone, and now, there was a whole other person in her place. Ryoko had refined herself into a genuine noblewoman, from the way she acted to the way she handled the increasing responsibilities of her home planet. It was amazing to see her work so diligently and still have enough energy to watch over little Yosho, especially considering there were now at least a hundred servants who could do the job for her.
Ryoko would insist that there were no problems, and that she loved taking care of kids (not nearly as much as Mihoshi, who was the beloved matron of the Tg orphanage), and the servants could concentrate on other matters, and things would go on peacefully. However, nobody knew the true reason behind Ryoko's kind actions, and if they did, they would understand why she hogged Yosho Ryoka Misaki all to herself.
I wish you were my baby, she would sigh mentally. Yosho would smile and gurgle back at her, and the woman would grow just a fraction more despondent. Despite what she had said in previous times, Ryoko honestly and truly wanted to experience motherhood, and while she was patient with the prospect, having to take care of Ayeka's child left a profound effect on her.
If one were to seriously study Ryoko, one would discover several interesting things about her. Put simply and briefly, the woman was now experiencing what it truly felt like to have a family. She was married to a wonderful man that she would forever love, and had an excellent co-wife and friend in Ayeka. Her in-laws ranged from the loveable Nobuyuki and Sasami, to the serious Asuza, to the warmhearted former priest Joshua and his twin sister Mabel--and of course, there was Nagi, her beloved twin sister, and Holtz, who was like a father figure to Ryoko.
It had not been that long ago when Ryoko was a loner, wandering through the galaxy with just Ryo-ohki at her side--and Nagi, on those occasions when the hunter would give chase. Ryoko was indeed cold and lonely for those countless years, and though on the outside she had been a wild and carefree woman, doing as she pleased, on the inside she was screaming. There was nobody, nobody at all, that was there for her when things got bad.
In a strange way, for those first few years, the only people she could rely on were those that hated her the most. Both Ayeka and Nagi, now her closest friends and family, had been powerful enemies of the space pirate, but even this was better than nothing at all. Ryoko could certainly depend on Ayeka or Nagi being there, even if their presence meant discord, trouble, and violence.
Then came Tenchi, and it seemed as if everything fell into place after that. But even then, Ryoko still felt distant, like she didn't belong, and that she was just a nuisance to everybody else. She was, of course, but she was still fiercely loved inside that crazy house--loved so much that Washu had been willing to make great sacrifices to change the pirate's ways. The gamble worked magnificently, and when everything was said and done, Ryoko had found a kindred spirit in a once-antagonistic woman.
After that, things began to roll for the ex-pirate. Nagi revealed herself to be her twin sister, and the girls went on a quest to discover their roots. Their search led them to Tg, to the family they never knew, and the legacy they never imagined. Things continued to roll faster and faster for Ryoko after that: the destruction of Pandemonium, the reestablishment of Tg, the marriage, the baby, the increased family… It was as if all of her wishes were coming true in the span of just a few hours.
"So, I really have a family now, eh?" she said emptily. The baby did not stir, nor did the wind pick up. It was a remarkable day on Tg, the kind that demanded everyone step outside and spend time in revelry. For that particular moment, Ryoko had decided to take Yosho out for a stroll, and it was on this hill where her travels ended up taking her. Tenchi and Ayeka were off on a quiet date, and Nagi was probably off somewhere having the time of her life. It was too good a day to be working, even Holtz knew that.
"You wanna know a secret?" said Ryoko to her half-son. The baby remained asleep. "All right. Don't tell anyone, but I'm really hoping that you get a little brother or sister sometime. You know? I wanna have a baby. Strange, I know, especially since it's coming from me, but I guess that all this time I'm spending with you is having some strange effect on me. It's like my maternal instincts are kicking in, ya know? So, keep that a secret, okay?" The faithful baby remained silent, and would forever thus keep his tongue. Ryoko smiled and kissed him gently.
"Good. Hey, Yosho, we can always tell each other our secrets, you know? We don't have to hide anything from each other. You're not my biological son, but it feels like you're still a part of me. ……I guess… Ayeka and Sasami feel the same about Funaho, maybe. Ahh, who knows?" Snorting, Ryoko didn't notice Yosho waking up. The baby opened his eyes, gurgled, and looked straight at his surrogate mother.
"Hm? You wanna go somewhere else?" said Ryoko, sensing the child's needs. She slowly picked the baby up and put him back in his stroller. Smiling warmly, Ryoko flew into the air with the baby and stroller with her, and carried them both to the manor. Perhaps--just perhaps--she needed some time away from the little boy. Ryoko loved the child to death, but even she needed some vacation time. Besides, she needed to have a talk with somebody.
Joshua Fionn was sprinting as fast as he possibly could, but even then, his wife Nagi was closing in on him. Shouting something along the lines of "you can't outrun Nagi, the greatest bounty hunter in the universe!", she was giving chase to the one she loved, and though the race looked fiercely competitive, both of them were laughing out loud. Finally, Nagi leaped forward and tackled her love, sending both of them tumbling and rumbling to the floor. Nagi fiercely locked her hands over Joshua's wrists, successfully pinning the strong man to the floor.
"Ha! I gotcha!" she snarled with glee. He smiled warmly at her, and at the precarious position they were now in.
"Yeah, you got me all right. But what're you gonna do with me?"
"Have my way with you, of course--like all my prey," said Nagi coolly, tapping his nose with her finger. Joshua's face turned slightly pink.
"…Here? Now?"
"Sure, why not?"
"But, we're outside, Nanette! People will see us!!"
"It's too nice of a day to go inside!" Nagi sighed, and slumped down so she could be within the embrace of her loved one. She turned around so he could fold his hands over her stomach, the way she liked best, and together, the two lovers stared up into a sky more blue and pure than sapphires.
"Hey," came a voice from above. Nagi squinted in the sun and smiled as she saw her twin sister approach them. The taller woman waved aimlessly and did her best to sit up.
"What's up, sis?"
"I'm not interrupting anything now, am I?" asked Ryoko cattily. Nagi chuckled and managed to hide her crimson face.
"Nahh. We weren't doing anything, just having fun. It's nice to relax and let loose on days like this."
"Yeah… Hey, speaking of which, can I ask you two for a favor?"
"Sure, name it!" said Joshua. Ryoko presented them with Yosho.
"Could you take care of him?" she requested. "I'm getting a little tired and I need a break, and besides, you two might need to brush up on your parenting skills. With the way you frolic around like that, I'm surprised you're not expecting already!" Nagi's face submitted to blushing, and the taller of the twins smiled humbly before speaking.
"Well… we've been taking things slow," she said gently. "Josh and I are just enjoying this time to ourselves. We will have children, but not for awhile. But hey, I'd be more than happy to look after this little one for you!" Ryoko smiled and handed her half-son over to her sister, and the one-time bounty hunter tickled little Yosho playfully.
"Hey there, little guy! Remember me? I'm your Aunt Nagi! Can you say NAGI for me?"
"He can't talk yet," said Ryoko, "unless you consider 'boo' and 'baa' words."
"Nahh, didn't think so." The sisters smiled as the reigns of babysitter were passed from one to the other, and with a wave, Ryoko left her family for some much-needed private time. Her aim was for Tenchi and Ayeka; the three of them had not spent that much time together, what with business and a baby to take care of, so it would do the noblewoman good to spend time with those she loved.
Over the course of that month, Ryoko's "maternal instincts" grew more and more powerful, until they would come out even during Yosho's absence. Ryoko would grow sad and depressed, and would oftentimes mope around when there was little to do. She would get into the habit of instinctively going after the baby if he so much as moaned a little, even if Ayeka insisted that the problem was hers to solve. Finally, after a few weeks of this, Ryoko confessed to Tenchi that she had not been telling the truth that day, and that her biological clock was blaring out loud.
When they asked a good doctor if there were any problems, he insisted that there weren't any. There was nothing wrong with Tenchi, and Ryoko should have been able to produce, so the only explanation the doctor could give was that it all had to do with timing. Now obviously, it was a bit embarrassing to talk about one's business in bed, so everything was left up to assumption until Ryoko could speak more privately.
"It's just a simple solution," she said. "Tenchi needs to spend, eh, a little more time with me, if you know what I mean."
"Do you really want children that badly?!" exclaimed Ayeka. Ryoko gave her closest and most loyal friend a serious look.
"Yes, I do. Ayeka, I know I'm sounding selfish here, but…… ever since I found out that Nagi was my real sister, I've had this idea of a family in my mind. I already have a husband and a sister and more in-laws than I dare count, but… well, I want to make this… real, ya know? I don't know how else I can explain it, it just…" She trailed off and sighed, and received a gentle hug from Tenchi.
"I think I understand," he told her. Ryoko smiled and kissed his cheek.
"You're too good to me, Tenchi."
"You deserve it," he whispered in her ear. Ryoko shivered and giggled, and it was said that the young man could always find some way to cheer her up. Ayeka sighed wearily at the two, and gave her dearest friend a stern look.
"Ryoko… you know that I would do anything for you, dear. …And, I suppose, I really have been spending too much time with Lord Tenchi, but that is perhaps because you spend so much time with our child! Honestly, dear, if you didn't hog poor Yosho so much, you might actually have a child of your own by now!"
"Oh, yeah…" muttered Ryoko with a watery smile. Both Tenchi and Ayeka gave their eyes a mighty roll.
"Silly," teased Tenchi as he nibbled on her ear. Ryoko shrieked out again and slapped him playfully, and poor Ayeka had to leave or else vomit from all the sweet sugariness of the moment.
One fine day, when Ryoko's depression was at a particular neutral state, the entire assemblage of family and friends that she loved so much decided to cheer her up, even if it killed them. Ryoko was grateful, but didn't know how in the world they could pull off something like that. When Tenchi explained it to her, she did indeed laugh, though not in amusement.
"You're kidding, right?!" she shrieked. "A baseball game?!?!"
"Yeah! That always makes me feel happy!" Ryoko shook her head and gave her lover a dim smile.
"I don't even know how to play! I'm not gonna have any fun!"
"Oh, that doesn't matter!" he scowled, hugging her neck fiercely like she used to do to him. "Trust me, I'm about the only person here who knows how to play! But Ryoko, please say you'll go along with this. We're only doing this to make you happy. You know that each and every one of us loves you very much, and that we'd do anything to see you smile." Ryoko couldn't help but do just that as she gazed at the young man, and a tear almost came out as he expressed such devotion. The woman pulled him in for a delicate hug, and rubbed her cheek against his.
"Oh, Tenchi… you really are too good to me…"
"Only because you deserve the best," he replied. The young man kissed her gently, and pointed his head to the outside world. "C'mon, get dressed. Everyone else is already getting prepared. C'mon, it'll be fun! We don't get too many chances to do this sort of thing!!" Ryoko smiled, too happy to do anything else, and nodded her head in agreement.
"All right. For you, Tenchi, and for those that love me, I would do anything."
"Anything?" She grinned and gave him a classical Ryoko-brand thumbs up.
"You know it!!!"
Sure enough, by the time Ryoko and Tenchi changed into their uniforms, the rest of the gang was already outside waiting. It was a riot to see Ayeka and Nagi dressed up in baseball outfits, complete with caps and cleats, but Holtz as the umpire beat them all out. Since there were only nine people there, excluding Washu, it was decided that the teams would be divided up into four--unless the two cabbits got in on the action.
"Outfield?!" blurted a disbelieving Nagi. Ken-ohki nodded his head.
"Choww!!"
"You sure? Does Ryo-ohki agree with you?"
"Mreaow!" squealed Ryo-ohki. Nagi sighed and shrugged her shoulders.
"Okay, okay, you two can be on outfield. Oh, hey Ryoko! Tenchi! Looks like you two made it just in time!"
"Whaddya mean?" asked Ryoko, who had just came onto the diamond. "Isn't this whole thing just for me?"
"Yeah."
"So I could've been an hour early or an hour late, and it wouldn't make any difference!" Nagi smiled smugly and tipped her cap, but chose to make no comment. Ayeka, however…
"Would you please get on with it?!" she shouted. "I would very much like to whip my opposing team into submission and have them beg for mercy!"
"Sounds fun!!" squealed Ryoko. "Can I be on your team? Nobody would stand a chance against us!"
"Sounds good!" stated Ayeka, and the two one-time enemies shook on it. Tenchi, however, chose to be on the opposing team, to the surprise of literally everybody there.
"Just to even the odds a little," he said slyly. "I wouldn't want things to go too unfairly." Ayeka and Ryoko protested, but Tenchi insisted that he be on that very team. Nagi and Joshua were also on that same team, but to "even the odds", Mihoshi was placed there as well. With a sigh of relief, Ryoko and Ayeka smiled at each other.
"This should be easier than swatting flies!" exclaimed the princess. "Even with your sister and brother-in-law on their side, Mihoshi will ruin everything! So, who do we have to work with?"
"Just Kiyone and Sasami," replied Ryoko. Ayeka nodded her head.
"Right. …I think those are pretty fair odds. So, who's on first?"
"What."
"I said, who's on first!" repeated Ayeka.
"What!" repeated Ryoko.
"Who… is… on… first?"
"What!"
"Enough of your games!" shouted Ayeka. She sighed, and calmed down just long enough to regain her civility. "…Fine. Lady Christina, can you tell me who's going to be on second?"
"Yes," she replied.
"All right then. Who is it?"
"Yes," she said again. Steam came out of Ayeka's ears."
"Can you please tell me who is on second?!"
"Okay, Who is on second!"
"THAT'S WHAT I'M ASKING YOU!!!"
"And I'm telling you, Who is on second!"
"Enough!!" Ayeka's scream reached the very ends of the outfield, where Ryo-ohki and Ken-ohki were staring back in awe. The princess slowly calmed down, and tried one more time.
"…All right, have it your way. Just tell me who's going to play third base."
"Where," replied Ryoko.
"Third base!" pointed Ayeka. "Who's going to play third base?"
"No, Who's on second," replied Ryoko. Ayeka's anger increased.
"That is what I want to know!! Who is on second and third?!"
"No-no-no, Who can only be on one base at a time," pointed Ryoko. "Who is on second, Where is third, and What is on first."
"YOU ARE BEGINNING TO ANNOY ME, LADY RYOKO!!!" roared Ayeka. "Tell me in simple terms!! WHAT are the NAMES of the PEOPLE who are going to PLAY for the BASES!?!"
"…I think I understand now," said Ryoko carefully. "What is the name of the person on first."
"That's what I'd like to know!!"
"Who is the name of the person on second."
"Use proper grammar, Ryoko!!"
"Where is the name of the person on third."
"It's not supposed to be lost!!" screamed Ayeka. She let out an irritated growl, yet somehow managed to keep her royal anger in check as she asked one final question. "…Dare I ask who the pitcher is?"
"I don't know," replied Ryoko. Ayeka let out another groan and slumped down on the ground.
"You don't know… You don't even know who's the pitcher?!"
"Who's on second," replied Ryoko. Ayeka's face turned white from rage.
"THAT IS WHAT I AM TRYING TO ASK YOU!!!!!"
"Ayeka!!!" shouted Nagi suddenly. The former bounty hunter walked over to her friend and managed to calm the enraged girl down. "Get a grip! What's the problem?"
"Your nitwit of a sister won't tell me who's playing the positions of the game!!" screamed Ayeka. Nagi gave Ryoko a sour look.
"Ryoko, are you picking on poor Ayeka again?"
"No, I'm telling her what she wants to know! I'm not being mean at all!"
"What's she telling you, Ayeka?" asked Nagi. The princess groaned in frustration.
"Well, when I asked her who was on first, she didn't seem to hear me. She couldn't give me a straight answer for second, and she doesn't even know where the third base is, or who the pitcher is!"
"Oh, is that all?" said Nagi doubtfully. The look Ayeka gave her would have melted the sun. "Yikes! Whoa, sorry there, princess! But hey, maybe I can make things clear for you!"
"Can you? Would you?! I hope rudeness isn't genetic in your family."
"HEY!!"
"Quiet," hissed Nagi. "You've been naughty enough, Ryoko. Go assemble your team or something. Anyway, Ayeka, the thing goes as this. 'What' is the name of the person on first. That's their name, What, and 'What' is their name." A pause.
"…Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Yeah, now you're getting it!" smiled Nagi. "And 'Who' is the name of the person on second. 'What' is the name of the person on third, and 'I don't know' is the name of the pitcher. Do you understand now?"
"…I believe so," said Ayeka. "But, we don't have anybody here by that name!"
"It was just a joke, highness," chuckled Nagi. "It was just Ryoko being silly with you. I saw that same deal on an old television comedy sketch, and I guess it's not funny to the person that never heard of the joke before. Sorry. Should I go have a talk with her?"
"…No," sighed Ayeka wearily. "I'll just have to be mean to her for awhile. That wasn't a very good joke." Nagi smiled, but nodded her head anyway.
"Yeah. Anyway, for this inning, it's Mihoshi on first, Joshua on second, and myself on third. Tenchi is pitching."
"Why didn't she say so before?!" whined Ayeka. Nagi laughed out loud, and leaned forward to give her friend a hug.
"Because," she said, "Ryoko has a very strange way of expressing her love towards you."
"Yes, so I've noticed…"
The game moved rather swiftly for having so many people who were inexperienced in the sport. Tenchi and his crew played a powerful game, despite having Mihoshi on their side, and were able to step up to bat after having Ayeka's team score only three times. The four of them quickly racked up several good points, but Mihoshi struck out every time, and soon the first inning was over.
This back-and-forth operation went on through most of the day. Tenchi was a better-than-average pitcher, and was able to strike out Ayeka and Sasami with almost no trouble at all. Kiyone was simply average in the sport all the way around, and made her fair share of hits and misses, but it was Ryoko who stole the game. Some said that Tenchi allowed her to hit so many home runs, and that it was fixed because she needed the relaxation, but this was mostly untrue. Ryoko simply knew how to swat things, that was all.
Kiyone was a good pitcher, and could even strike Tenchi out if luck was on her side. Ayeka and Ryoko were not good basewomen, even if they did decide to work together, and Sasami was not too spectacular either. Both Nagi and Joshua were inexperienced but powerful, in both hitting and running, and racked up points that went down the drain thanks to Mihoshi.
"There is no crying in baseball!" insisted Kiyone whenever her partner struck out. Of course, Mihoshi would only blubber some more, which resulted in the aqua-haired officer becoming more enraged, etc.
The tide of the game turned when Washu arrived with some of her machines. Carefully, the scientist placed them all across the outfield, giving them positions that had been compensated-for due to the lack of players. She also assigned herself to the losing team, which was Ryoko's in this case. Washu couldn't hit the Rock of Gibraltar with her baseball, but having such intellect, she didn't need to. Her bat had a secret homing device that drew the ball in to it, and but one whack repelled it back again.
The game soon grew to ridiculous and insane proportions, what with Washu's inventions and the way the cabbits always turned into spaceships. Every inning grew even wackier than the one that preceded it, and by the eleventy-first inning, nobody could say who was winning or losing--or even who was on what team anymore.
"The score's 13-R-52-J to sixteen billion and five," noted Washu as she cradled the ball in her glove. Ryo-ohki was at the mound, looking incredibly adorable wielding a small bat and in her miniature baseball uniform. The cabbit let out a meow, and struck the ball outside the field as it was tossed to her.
"Quick! Skip to first base! Then tackle the pitcher and wrestle them to the ground! Dig your way to second, then you'll have to answer the bridge keeper three questions before you can cross the bridge of death, and then you're at third! Run backwards to home plate, punch the umpire, and you've won!!!"
A pause.
"Mreaow?" questioned the cabbit.
"JUST GO!!!!" screamed Washu, and little Ryo-ohki was skipping along her way. Just then, Mihoshi walked towards Washu with that same empty look in her eyes.
"Hey, Washu? What's this?" she asked. Washu's eyes twitched as she saw that Mihoshi was in possession of the baseball.
"…That's the ball," she pointed.
"Oh really? Wow! What do I do with it?!"
"You eat it," muttered Washu sarcastically. Mihoshi looked at the ball in her usual strange fashion, and slowly opened her mouth…
"I WASN'T SERIOUS, MIHOSHI!!! D'GGAAAHAH!! Does anybody know the Heimlich maneuver?!"
Tenchi sighed as he plopped onto the ground. After playing a very crazy game of baseball through the entire day, he was completely wiped out. Happiness was even stronger in his body, though, and he couldn't boast of a time that he had had so much fun. Just then, Ryoko joined him, smiling in that same mischievous yet warm fashion.
"Well, looks like we won," she noted. Tenchi smiled.
"Yeah… but which team?"
"Both of them," she replied. Tenchi laughed out loud, and stood up to give his love a hug she deserved. The embrace was happily returned, and even multiplied, once Ayeka and Nagi and everyone else crowded around Ryoko. They lifted her up in the air like she had won the game, and cheered for her as they carried her away.
"Wow, this has been the perfect end to the most wonderful day ever!!" she exclaimed. "I consider myself… the luckiest woman… on the face… of the Earth! Only one thing could make this day go better!"
"What's that?" asked Tenchi over the shouting. Ryoko gave him one of her more devious looks.
"If we have sex."
"Huh?"
KER-PLOP!!!
Tenchi fell straight to the ground in a plummeting faint, twitching ever so slightly. Apparently, Ryoko's honesty was a bit too…… blunt for him.
"…Whoops!" chuckled the noblewoman as she scratched her neck. "Hehehe… I guess he keeled over from happiness!"
KER-PLOP!!!
Everybody, literally everybody, followed Tenchi's example by plummeting to the floor in a gigantic heap, leaving a bewildered Ryoko the only one left standing. The loveable woman chuckled again, and smiled to the very skies.
"Hehehe… I guess I have that kind of affect on people, hehehe…!"
Next chapter: Ahh, the conclusion. What was started in "Nagi: The Lonely Path of the Hunter" and subtly continued in "No Woman is an Island" must now come to an end. That's right, readers--the next chapter is the final, final, final one. It's the last chapter in this great and immense saga, so be prepared to say goodbye. But… how in the world am I going to conclude all of this?! Only one way to find out, in the next chapter, "No Need for a Conclusion!" It's unquestionably the last chapter!