We found our muse! Well, not really, but we found something that we find really funny. Yes, Anne got dragged to an un-named source that has "Happy Meals" and got one of these so-called "Happy Meals (Numair: How old are you?). Shut up! It's all I can eat! Anyway, in this "Happy Meal" I got this toy called "Beast." It's funny, you move its arm and its jaw drops practically off his head, and the stoned look in his eyes adds to the effect. Funny.

*blinks* That was random… enjoy the rest of the story. Godspeed!

Disclaimer: Although the "Beast" is trying to make us say that we own it, we don't. Evil Beast. (and we don't own those "Happy Meals" *shifts eyes around to avoid eye contact with lawyers*)

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Chapter 2: God Save Gaea!

Vroooom

Eeeeek!

Vrroooom!

Eeeeeek!!!!

"Automatic and I still can't drive it," muttered Numair, slamming on the gas pedal once more. Noticing that she was going more than ten miles per hour, Numair quickly slammed on the brakes.

"I wonder if Annie is still alive…"

Looking in the rearview mirror Numair noticed the sleeping dragon with blood dripping from its mouth and Anne's arm dangling from a protruding tooth.

"Erm… I still believe…?" Numair said inconvincibly, turning up the J-pop as the car jerked forward and back.

"I think I'm getting it…" she said shakily, actually speeding up the car to a whopping 12 miles per hour. The endless field stretched on and on, Numair slowly speeding up the car every now and then.

"This is easy!" Numair declared as the car jerked less. Gazing out the window, she was amazed at the beauty of the landscape. An endless sea of green grass under a blue sky spread across the land with gorgeous mountains in the distance. The Earth and moon hung in the sky.

"Neato…"

Just then, a strange figure appeared out of nowhere! A suicidal squirrel? No!

"What the Fu---!" cried the strange thing in the non-existent road.

Numair, never having been the quickest of thinkers, did what came natural.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!"

And froze.

THA-THUMP!

"Ooooh no…I hope that wasn't something important…"

[Anne's Note: Don't worry kids! It was only Zongi!]

"Really? Phew!" Numair sighed, relieved. Completely forgetting the previous incident, Numair went back to her watching of Gaea. The land was so lush, pretty, almost like her homeland in an unnamed part of the country, near someone with a flag pole.

"Computer… CD's…. television…. Pillie!!!" whimpered Numair, completely ignoring the task at hand, i.e. driving.

SMACK.

The car jerked to a stop, having hit something else.

"Erm… good thing Anne isn't alive or I would be in some deep shit…"

Looking up Numair noticed that she had hit something big, bigger than the mullet mobile. Numair opened her eyes once more and noticed she could not see what the figure that she hit.

"I'm not stupid enough to get out of the car," muttered Numair thinking of Anne, putting the car in Neutral. The car moved forward, once more hitting the object. "That's not right…"

Numair scratched her head in confusion, how would she get out of this situation? Suddenly, the sound of someone knocking on the glass snapped her back to reality. Fear pumping through her body, Numair looked at the window and….

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!" switching the car into Reverse, Numair gunned it.

"Hey!" screamed a tall blond.

Numair wasn't fooled, she was on another planet… perhaps that was an alien trying to rape her… or whatever the heck aliens try to do.

"Excuse me," started the person once more having walked back to the car while Numair pondered. "What kind of guymelf is that?"

"Guymelf? Guy melter!? Where!?" yelped Numair, shrinking back into the seat. "You're a feminist, aren't you!!!"

"Huh?" the stranger replied, touching the side-mirrors in fascination.

"Don't touch my car Ma'am," growled Numair, smacking the person's hand away.

"I'm a man. My name is Allen Schezar, one of the knights of Caeli, it is my honor to welcome you to Fanelia," bowed the knight, glancing at Numair. In reply he got a blank stare.

"Okay."

"So, what exactly is this thing that you are in?" inquired Allen backing up and looking the car over.

"It is a car given to me by my best friend," whimpered Numair, backing further away from Allen. "It's called 'Mullet-Mobile,' the Dragon-Pseudo-Slayer. Now excuse me, miss, but I must be getting somewhere… away… from you."

"I'm a man!" Allen yelled, insulted.

"Sorry Ellen, ma'am."

"It's Allen! So where did you come from, Pilot of the 'Dragon-Pseudo-Slayer."

"Mullet-Mobile!" she corrected, "Hey, I have a brother named Allan, 'cept he's male…"

"I am male!"

"Huh? Speak up?" Numair shouted, leaning out the window.

"MALE!"

"Well, there's some in the back, but it's illegal to take other people's mail…"

"Where are you from!?" Allen demanded, exasperated with this annoying snot.

"Uh…north…west?"

"Could you specify?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Look, I don't know where in the whatzitnazuba I am, except there's the Earth up there, yet I'm not suffocating, talking to a dumb blonde who's asking me my address! I don't know! Stop making fun of me!!!" Numair cried with her voice cracking, smacking her fists against the horn.

She then proceeded to faint…

"No I didn't, I'm not a sissy."

FAINT DAMN YOU!

"I feel faint," Numair muttered in monotone while rolling her eyes, and fell over.

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The warm feeling of sunlight touched Numair's face as she slowly opened her eyes. Groaning, she shrunk away from the sun back into the dark corners of the bed. Slowly, it dawned on Numair that she was in a bed, last time she recalled she was in the mullet-mobile…..

"IT touched me!!!" shouted Numair trying to dust the germs away.

Looking around the room Numair noticed it was nothing like she was used to. For one thing, the room was clean. The room was made mostly of dark timber wood, giving the room a cozy feeling. White curtains covered the window, however open to allow enough sunlight to wake up the 'creature of the night.'

"Where the fuck am I!?" demanded Numair to herself, glaring about the room as though it could answer.

"I see that you have woken up."

Looking up Numair noticed the blonde from earlier.

"AHH!!! RAPE!!!!" shrieked Numair, jumping off the bed to gain distance between Allen and herself.

"What?!" cried Allen, coming closer.

"Don't lie to me! I bet you wanted to KILL me and RAPE me!!!" Numair yelled. Suddenly her eyes widened, "Omigosh!!! You're a NECROPHELIAC!!!!!"

"What the heck!?!"

"I'm warning you!!! Stay back," declared the pale teenager grabbing a pillow off the bed, "I know how to use this!"

"Listen, I'm not going to…"

"'As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no pansy, for I…!"

"I will not hurt you so…"

"'No not an oath, if not the face of men, the sufferance of our souls…!'"

"Shut up you annoying little shit!" shouted Allen, losing his composure.

Numair paused and blinked. "Oh, I see," she taunted, "Not so knightly now, eh? Tsk, tsk tsk, yelling at the damsel in distress."

"Argh!" Allen raised his fist back. Just one hit would be enough to wipe the smirk off that things face.

"Allen!" Van cried, appearing behind Allen. Van had always known Allen as calm and composed, always masking his true emotions. He had never seen him like this. Looking around Allen, he gazed into the room to see what could upset his friend so.

Of average height, the strange…person was pale and thin, in that weird…eats-everything-in-sight-but-has-a-super-metabolism fashion. The shoulder length hair was mud-brown and unkempt. Grey eyes stared blankly, the host was not thinking.

"Is this the boy you found in that weird contraption?" Van inquired.

"Unfortunately." Grumbled Allen.

"Yo." Numair said, raising an index finger to point at them.

"What is your name?" Allen sighed.

"I cannot reveal that to you." She said dramatically, narrowing her eyes.

Allen threw his hands in the air in exasperation. "You try!" he hissed to Van.

"We need to know what to call you."

"Very well, you may call me," dramatic pause, "Numair, Dumbshit, Aden, Stinky, Leviathan, Bitch, Ponbiki, The Bruise, Peabrain, Weewee, Greasespot, hey you, and Hopeless. Pick one."

"What was the first one?" Van sighed, now seeing why Allen was so pissed.

"Numair."

"Alright then, where are you from Numair?"

"Earth."

Allen let out a grunt of frustration. Of course it would tell Van.

"Really? Do you know Hitomi?"

"The artist?"

Van chose to ignore that comment and continued. "My name is Van Fanel, this is my country, Fanelia."

"Your country? Oh, Fanel, of Fanelia, that works out great! …I dun get it."

Both men threw up their arms in annoyance, Numair did too, just for the heck of it.

"I am the king." Van stated slowly.

"Oh! I get it…!" cried Numair, nodding her head, grinning from ear to ear.

Van was glad she got it.

"I'm in an RPG!!!"

Both men tripped. "A what?" Allen demanded.

"Yeah, it all makes sense now, a knight, a king who undoubtedly has mystical powers of some kind……can you make things explode with a single gaze!? Wait, I need a character! Can I be a mage, neutral-evil?"

"What are you babbling about?" Van asked.

"Oh, right," Numair whispered, overly winking, "I'm not supposed to talk about my alignment."

"Yeah, okay um…we'll…send your food up to you." Allen said, backing out the door.

"Can I eat with you guys?"

"NO!"

"Oh, okay. Well, we are going to go adventuring, right?"

"Sure, whatever," they said slamming the door.

"Oh yay, this is just what I've always wanted! And that means Annie's not dead! Bonus!"

Numair sat down and pondered spells and other shit she would need in this mystical world, quarterstaff, dagger, bag of holding…wait.

"Do we have a thief!" Numair shouted at the locked door.

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A/N: You must understand, Numair's hearing sucks. She can't hear Anne from a distance of two feet. -_-;;; (Numair: What?). Next chapter we'll actually get into why the fic is called, "Numair in Love." Don't worry, this isn't going to be a long fanfic (readers rejoice).