Hey all.. here's the first chapter of a story that I based on the Jennifer Paige song "Beautiful" but it's not a songfic. My finishing the story depends on your reviews =) so please let me know! As we all know, these characters are not mine. They belong to J.K. Rowling and whoever owns the publishing rights to her stories. No copyright or trademark infringement is intended. Enjoy!
Beautiful
Harry's eyelids fluttered once. Twice. He tried to move, then groaned as his muscles flared up in pain. Gritting his teeth, he sat up slowly, slightly disoriented. Where was he? What had happened? He felt completely worn out and strangely empty. He shook his head, trying to clear it. He scanned the area around him, horrified at the sight of dead bodies scattered all over the grounds. Some were his friends and classmates from the past seven years. He recognized a few teachers as well.
Then he realized that he was still clutching something in his hand. He looked down.
Oh, God.
The grief that washed over him left the physical pain forgotten. Everything came flooding back, and tears sprang to his eyes. The hand he was squeezing was still warm. She seemed peaceful, but she was so unnaturally still.
"Move!" he pleaded. He gripped her hand even harder, stroking her hair, running his fingers down her face. Maybe that'll wake her up, he thought irrationally. He didn't want to shake her… she looked so fragile. So he kept saying her name, desperately begging her to wake up, and looking around for help that never arrived.
Finally, with his voice hoarse and his tears all dried up, he gave up. Completely numb, he leaned down and kissed her cold lips. Then he lay down beside her.
Before falling into an exhausted and dreamless sleep, he was tortured with one final and lasting image of the love of his life.
The sight of Hermione jumping in front of him at the last second, taking the curse herself, and ultimately sacrificing her life to save his.
~ * ~
In the darkness, he heard faraway voices shouting. People crying. Panicking. Worried. Grief-stricken. Wondering where their child/husband/wife/brother/sister was.
Harry suddenly sat up, rubbed the crust out of his eyes, and looked around. He knew this place. He'd been in and out of it for years. Madam Pomfrey's hospital wing. He was the only one there – where's Hermione?! – but from what he could hear from the other side of the door, it was complete chaos in Hogwarts at the moment.
He was just pushing the covers back to go look for her when the door opened.
"Harry, where do you think you're going?"
Sirius Black closed the door gently and took the chair next to Harry's bed. His face was closed, as usual, except for his eyes, which shone with sympathy. "It's not a good time to be showing your face out there right now."
"I was only going to look for Hermione," Harry said matter-of-factly. "Do you know where she's gone?"
There was pain and the smallest bit of pity in his godfather's eyes as he said, "Have you really forgotten?"
"Forgotten what?" Confused, he stared at Sirius.
Sirius's eyes were strangely bright as he said, "We didn't find out until a couple of hours after it happened. Mrs. Figg and I apparated as soon as we heard."
"Hermione's always reminding us that no one is able to do that on these grounds. Special charms and all that on the castle," Harry said automatically. Then his eyes widened as the memories of that morning's events returned. The pain hit full force, engulfing him.
Sirius put a hand on his arm as Harry started to tremble. "Since those spells were completely broken, we were able to." He paused, as if unsure whether to continue. He decided to venture on. "When we found you, you wouldn't let go of her. Do you remember? You kept saying 'Everything will be ok' over and over. We had to –" he winced visibly "—[force a relaxing potion, put a petrifying spell] on you so that we could get her body to give to her parents."
Now Harry winced. Her body. The shell that housed the world's most beautiful soul. Now it was all that was left. It. Not she.
"I tried to wake her up," Harry choked out. Tears were streaming down his cheeks as he stared beyond his godfather's face. Into nothingness. He spoke fast. "She looked like she was asleep. And she had this small smile on her face, and any other time, I would have left her alone because she looked so peaceful but I just wanted to make sure she was all right but she wouldn't wake up!" He hung his head, defeated, swiping at the wetness on his face. "She wouldn't open her eyes. And I felt so helpless and so useless and all I could think of was being as close to her as possible... even if she wasn't really there.
"Oh, God, I might as well have died with her," Harry whispered. "It would be better than this." He turned to Sirius, who was in tears himself. "The hurting.. it's just too much. I don't know if I can take it."
Then he broke down in his godfather's arms.
~ * ~