See disclaimers on chapter 9.
A/N: This entire chapter is another of Snape's flashbacks, so I have decided to forego the italics again. Any italics in this chapter indicate Snape's thoughts. Also, this chapter contains more references to underage sexual activity (at least in the area in which I live, though I believe Severus is of age for the UK). Please use your browser's back button if this is going to present a problem for you.
Chapter 12
Avis had a weakness for Muggle music. For as long as Severus could remember, the WWN had been airing a one-hour program of Muggle standards every Sunday night, and she rarely failed to tune it in. When he was a child and Dunstan was still healthy, Severus would often creep down the stairs and sit in the shadows to watch his parents dance across the sitting room, their feelings for each other apparent in their eyes as they smiled at one another and sang along softly as they swayed. From time to time, when a song came on to which they did not know the words, they would kiss in the way they never kissed when they knew he was there. After the music ended and the news broadcast following it began, Severus would make his way back to his bed as quietly as possible, enjoying the funny, fluttery feeling that the sight of his parents' happiness left lingering in his chest.
Avis and Benjamin did not dance. In fact, Benjamin didn't like Muggle music, so Avis had to indulge her guilty pleasure in solitude, the volume turned down low enough that only she could hear it. When Severus was home from Hogwarts, he sometimes sat with his mother and thought back on the stolen kisses he had witnessed while the radio played tunes by Muggle singers with unlikely names like Buddy Holly, Elvis Presley and Rosemary Clooney. Neither of them spoke much on these occasions, but he had the feeling Avis was also recalling the times when both of them had felt safe and content because Dunstan held her in his arms.
A particular favorite of hers was a song called "What A Difference A Day Makes." She often hummed it to herself when Benjamin wasn't around, and over the years Severus had learned the words, as well.
What a difference a day makesTwenty-four little hours
Brought the sun and the flowers
Where there used to be rain…
Insipid lyrics, really. Utter rubbish. Yes, he had seen his share of differences made in a day – Dunstan's death, his mother's remarriage and the fight with Lucius that led to his self-imposed exile from the Slytherin common room among them – but they had all been negative. He had yet to see positive changes brought about by the events of a single day.
And then, one warm, humid day in the summer after his fifth year at Hogwarts, his perceptions of Marinall made an abrupt about-face. At sunrise, she was nothing more to him than the barely tolerable spoiled brat he had known all his life. But by midday, she had suddenly become an incredibly desirable young woman, and by midnight, they were parting with a hurried embrace after sharing her bed for the first time.
And suddenly, that ridiculous song seemed to make all the sense in the world.
***
It was quite early when Severus unwarded one of the mansion's many side doors and slipped out onto the grounds – so early, in fact, that the house elves were the only other members of the household awake. That was fine with him. It meant he was able to enjoy a leisurely, hot breakfast and still get out of the house without having to talk to anyone else.
A perfect way to start the day.
Walking out into the muggy air was like being slammed headfirst into a clammy wall. The air was thick with banks of steam rising from the scores of puddles left scattered across the lawns in the wake of a severe thunderstorm the night before, and for a moment he considered abandoning his plans and sneaking back inside to the cooler environment of his bedroom. But something was calling him to the outdoors today, and so he set off, picking his way carefully through the puddles and licking a few stray toast crumbs from the tip of his thumb as he walked.
His destination was a kidney-shaped, algae-covered pond hidden within a copse of trees about a kilometer north of the house. It had been one of his favorite places to play as a child, mostly because Dunstan used to Transfigure stones into fish and allow Severus to catch them with a stubby, wooden fishing pole. A massive boulder stood majestically on the bank of this pond, its ancient surface worn smooth enough to make it a comfortable place to sit and read. He had been making his way toward this outdoor sanctuary every morning for about a week now, a copy of the Hogwarts' sixth-year potions text tucked carefully under one arm. Professor Eldridge had given it to him at the end of last term, and he planned on committing as much of it to memory as possible before returning to school in September.
Severus knew that many of his housemates had arranged to spend time at each others' homes during this, the summer holiday. It had been the sole topic of discussion (other than final exams) in the Slytherin common room for the last few weeks of the term. He, of course, had been excluded from all of their plans, and was spending the summer at home with his mother and stepfather. Thankfully, this was no longer the ordeal it had been in his early years at Hogwarts, as Benjamin simply didn't frighten him anymore. Now 16, Severus had nearly attained his full adult height, and he stood a good head-and-a-half taller than his stepfather. Though thin and gangly yet, he somehow still managed to present the appearance of a powerful man, and Benjamin became less and less inclined to engage him with violent means as both his body and his magical skills strengthened in tandem.
He had no such hesitation about excoriating the boy with his sharp tongue, however. Very little about Severus seemed to miss Benjamin's keen eye, and even less was to the man's liking. He commented ruthlessly on almost everything his stepson did and said, sometimes with calculated cruelty, other times with deliberate casualness, but always with the underlying aim of reminding Severus precisely who was in control of the household. Just lately it had been on the tip of his tongue to tell Benjamin to go on and piss a circle around the house to mark it as his territory and be done with it once and for all. Or at least until Severus was of an age where he could legally claim it as his own, the way his father had intended. But he checked the urge and opted for avoiding Benjamin as much as possible instead, hoping to keep the peace Avis so desperately wanted and so seldom got.
Benjamin had been even edgier than usual the night before, if such a thing were possible. Marinall was coming for her annual summer visit, and as usual, she was late in arriving. She had been expected sometime that morning, but there was still no sign of her at the conclusion of the dinner hour, and when the first flashes of lightning began forking across the dusky sky, Benjamin's face became sketched with lines of worry.
"Where could she be?" he demanded gruffly of no one in particular. He had abandoned his pudding and customary after-dinner cigar in favor of standing by the window to keep watch for his daughter. The storm was gathering strength quickly, and Apparating was a tricky business even under the best of circumstances. "She should have been here hours ago!"
"Perhaps she changed her plans again," Avis ventured mildly. "That's what happened a few years ago, remember?"
Severus remembered. Fresh out of Beauxbatons, Marinall had decided to spend the summer in Paris with a few of her friends rather than burying herself at Snape Manor – a logical choice, as far as Severus was concerned. The problem was, she had forgotten to inform her father of the decision, with the result that Benjamin was frantic with worry for several days until he discovered her whereabouts.
He hoped Marinall hadn't done the same thing again. A frantic Benjamin was a dangerous Benjamin.
"No, that's not it," his stepfather replied, waving his hand in the air as if Avis's idea was a particularly pesky insect to be shooed away. "I just had an owl from her yesterday. She was planning to be here before lunch."
Severus quietly exhaled his relief, then bolted the remainder of his pudding and excused himself from the table. He spent the rest of the night poring over his textbook and forgot all about Marinall's impending arrival.
But he thought about it now as he shaded his eyes against the bright morning light. I wonder if she ever made it? he thought, wiping away a bead of perspiration that was tickling its way down his temple.
He was not particularly eager to see her. Ever since that Christmas when she had promised to talk to Benjamin on his behalf, she was nice enough to him on the infrequent occasions when they were alone together, but she was always cool and indifferent toward him whenever her father was present. Trying to look good in front of "daddy," I suppose, he thought scornfully. Can't have Benjamin's precious little girl showing favor to the detested stepson, regardless of how she might feel about me personally.
The hypocrisy was unsettling.
He shrugged it off. He would know soon enough if she had finally arrived or not. No sense wasting time thinking about it now, when he had so much important reading to do.
By the time he reached the pond, he was slick with sweat from head to foot. A few quick spells and his perch on the stone was both dry and adorned with comfortable cushions Transfigured from the same stones he used to catch as a child. He clambered up onto the stone and sat cross-legged with the book in his lap, then opened it with a contented sigh and applied himself to his task.
He read for a long while, swatting absentmindedly every once in a while at the small flies that came to slake their thirst on the trickles of sweat pouring down his face and neck. He barely noticed them, so lost was he in the deliciously complex material detailed in the text. Next term was going to be very interesting. He couldn't wait to get his hands on some of the more exotic potions ingredients they would be working with.
The sun rose higher in the sky as he read, and the day became beastly hot. His seat was shaded from the sun by the tall trees surrounding the pond, but as the sun approached its zenith, the heat began to numb his mind until he felt like his head was filled with huge wads of cotton where his brain used to be. When the words began blurring together on the page, he knew it was time for a rest. He tucked one of the cushions behind his head and shoulders and settled back against it. Just for a minute, he promised himself.
He jerked awake sometime later – bloody hell, when had he fallen asleep? – to the feel of cool drops of water skittering across his face. He sat bolt upright and squinted in the sunlight, his sleep-addled brain trying to figure out why it was raining while the sun was still shining so brightly. He shook his head in confusion as a second round of raindrops spattered against his cheeks.
Someone was laughing. When his head finally cleared, he looked up to find Marinall standing before him, clutching a small bouquet of heat-wilted wildflowers in her fist. Her other hand was dripping with the water she'd scooped up from the pond to splash on him.
"Hullo, sleepyhead," she teased. "You ought to be careful. With skin as fair as yours, you'll get a nasty burn sleeping in the sun like that."
"I didn't mean to fall asleep," he replied peevishly. "It's just so bloody hot out here."
She laughed again and flicked her wet hand at him once more. This time, most of the drops landed on the open pages of his potions text.
"Stop it!" he shouted, swiping the offending drops away with the side of his hand. "You'll ruin my book!"
She rolled her eyes. "Ugh. You're such a swot, Severus. Why are you studying in the middle of the summer, anyway?"
"I don't want to fall behind in school, that's why."
"How dreadfully dull. Everything here is so dreadfully dull. I've only been here a few hours, and I'm already so bored I could scream." She wiped her wet hand on the hem of her skirt and dropped down onto the stone beside him.
"If you're so bored, why don't you get a job?" he inquired brusquely.
She laughed merrily, as though he had just told the funniest joke she'd ever heard. "Why on earth would I want to do that?" she asked incredulously. "With my father's money behind me, I'll never have to work a day in my life."
Severus did not trust himself to reply. Lucky cow, he thought bitterly. He, meanwhile, would have to work his arse off once he finished school if he wanted to be able to maintain the house in the manner he felt it deserved.
"So what is there to do for fun around here?" Marinall asked, as if she were visiting the house for the first time.
Fun. It seemed like such an alien concept that he had to pause for a moment to consider his response. Before Dunstan's illness, he and his father had done things together that might be considered fun, traveling and playing chess, or sometimes working together in Dunstan's potions business. After his father's death, Severus had been too busy dodging Benjamin's curses and hiding in his room to have much time for fun, and his time at Hogwarts was devoted to studying. Truth to tell, the only real fun he had anymore was snarking at Lily Evans, and she was on the other side of the country right now, spending the summer with James Potter and Company.
"Nothing, as usual," he replied finally.
"I was afraid you were going to say that," she pouted, her tone childishly petulant. Honestly, if he didn't know she was nearly 21, he would never have been able to guess. She was the epitome of a 13 year old child trapped in an adult's body. "Well let's make our own fun, then. Come for a walk with me."
She tugged on the corner of his book, trying to unseat it from his lap, but he yanked it back. "Leave me be, Marinall! I want to finish reading this."
She pulled a face, and Severus could not help but wonder if she would still be after him to do something with her if Benjamin were around. It didn't take much thought to know the answer to that question.
"I know!" she exclaimed suddenly, gesturing to the pond. "Let's go for a swim!"
"Don't be daft," he sneered. "That water is filthy! Besides, we haven't any bathers."
"We don't need any," she replied eagerly, tugging the tail of her blouse free of the waistband of her skirt. "We can go starkers." Before Severus could protest that he had no intention of doing any such thing, she had whipped the blouse off over her head in one fluid motion.
Severus felt his jaw drop open in surprise. She wore nothing under the blouse, and her small, firm breasts were bared to his hungry gaze. Gods, they were perfect. Breathtakingly gentle contours and flawless peach-colored skin, capped with generous, pointed nipples that flushed and hardened as his eyes skimmed over them. The sunlight reflecting from the beads of perspiration coating each delectable curve seemed to make her glow, and even as he watched, several small drops melded together and began a slow roll into the furrow of her cleavage. He darted his tongue nervously between his teeth, tasting the tang of saline on his own upper lip, and for an instant he allowed himself to imagine what it would be like to lean forward and lap up that salty trickle.
Marinall smiled coyly at his slack-jawed expression, and he could tell by the look in her eyes that the idea of swimming was suddenly the furthest thing from her mind. "Have you ever been with a woman, Severus?" she asked softly, shimmying her shoulders a bit so her breasts jiggled provocatively. He shook his head slowly, unable to look away from the tantalizing rise and fall her movements created. A hot rush of blood between his thighs signaled his blossoming erection as the intent of her question became clear.
She glanced down at his lap, and his face flushed hotly with the realization that she knew exactly what the twitching behind his zipper meant. She scooted closer to him until their legs were pressing against each other. "Would you like to touch me?" she whispered, reaching out to grasp his wrists and draw his hands forward to cup her breasts. "Go on," she urged, arching into his touch.
He kneaded her sun-warmed flesh tentatively, exhaling the breath he hadn't even realized he'd been holding as her taut nipples tickled the sensitive center of each of his palms. So sweet, so firm, ahh, by the gods, she's so amazingly beautiful… I want to taste her… I want to kiss her… This is… this is…
This is so bloody wrong! What the fuck am I doing?!
The absurdity of it all suddenly hit him like a hammerblow, and he snatched his hands away as though he had been scalded. "You're mad," he ground out through painfully clenched teeth, backing away. "Your father would have me drawn and quartered if he knew."
"You worry too much, Severus," she replied airily. "Daddy will never find out."
He rose unsteadily to his feet, unable to form a proper response. The imprint of her skin was still burning his palms as he scooped up his book and turned to head back toward the house. "Let me know if you change your mind!" she called playfully to his retreating back.
The last thing he heard as he hurried away across the grounds was the echo of her laughter.
****
His knees were trembling so violently by the time he got back to the house, it was a miracle he was able to climb the stairs. Luckily, Avis and Benjamin were nowhere in evidence when he returned, so he was able to reach the privacy of his bedroom without anyone noticing the blatantly obvious bulge that strained at the front of his trousers.
Once inside, he threw the precious book carelessly on his desk and collapsed back on the bed, trying to will away the now painful hard-on he continued to sport. I cannot – *will* not – get myself off while think of Marinall, he vowed, frantically reciting potions ingredients in his head to distract himself. Fluxweed, bicorn horn, bouncing bulbs… gods, bouncing bulbs, indeed… alihotsy leaves, daisy root, essence of dragonfire… she has amazing tits… they fit so perfectly in my hands… no! stop it!… puffapods, billywig stings, rat spleen, tubeworm… I'd like to slip her *my* tubeworm… shit. Shitshitshit… this isn't working…oh fuck it…
He surrendered to the inevitable and fumbled quickly at his zipper to take himself in hand. Sensory memories of the feel of Marinall's breasts and fantasies of being trapped between her legs danced through his head as he stroked himself madly, groaning with abandon until the terrible, wonderful pressure was finally relieved.
For a few long moments, he basked in the afterglow, waiting for his heart rate to slow. Eventually, the higher parts of his brain kicked in again and he was able to analyze the situation rationally. He knew better than to flatter himself by thinking Marinall wanted him out of anything close to having real feelings for him, or even honest attraction. No. She was just bored and looking for a way to kill some time, and if it felt good in the process, so much the better. She had always been impulsive that way, acting first and thinking later, if at all. No doubt she would have been Sorted into Gryffindor, if she had attended Hogwarts, he thought wryly.
And perhaps there was also something of the lure of the forbidden fruit to it for her. Benjamin would be absolutely livid if he knew. Severus had to admit that that aspect of it held some appeal to him, as well. How he would love to throw it in his stepfather's face that his sweet, innocent little girl had propositioned him. He would never dare to do such a thing, of course. Not if he wanted to live to see the age of 17. Still, it was a delicious idea to contemplate…
Sometime later, his reverie was broken by a timid rapping at his door and the soft voice of one of the house elves informing him that dinner was served. For an instant, he seriously considered sending word that he would not be present at the table. The thought of facing Marinall again and acting as though nothing had happened was definitely off-putting. But before he could find his tongue, his stomach decided the matter for him by issuing an embarrassingly loud rumble, and he suddenly realized he was ravenously hungry.
"I'll be along in a minute," he called through the door, and he heard the elf scurrying away down the corridor.
As usual, the family did not speak during the meal, and for once Severus was glad of it. He could feel Marinall's gaze alight on him from time to time, but he refused to look up. No sense in giving her the satisfaction of knowing precisely what effect the day's events had had on him.
The meal seemed to stretch on forever. When the house elves finally cleared the dishes away and the pudding was served, Benjamin and Marinall began chatting together. Avis tried engaging Severus in conversation, as well, but he responded in monosyllables only. He had no desire to talk to any of them right now. He just wanted to finish eating and get away from the table as quickly as possible.
"So how's school, Severus?" Marinall said suddenly, folding her napkin daintily and placing it on the table beside her plate. Was he imagining it, or was there a decidedly flirtatious undertone to her words? She must be insane, tipping her hand in front of her father that way.
"'S fine," he grunted. The question made him both suspicious and uncomfortable.
"Good, good," she replied cheerfully. "You like your classes, then?"
Severus shrugged. Shut up and leave me alone, Marinall, for the love of the gods.
"And are you seeing anyone there? Anyone special?"
"No," he said, clenching his teeth.
Benjamin snorted derisively. "Who'd have him?" the man sneered.
Avis and Severus both looked up at Benjamin in the same instant, Avis with a deep frown and Severus with a glare. If only you knew! he thought wildly, his hands curling into tight fists under the table. It was on the tip of his tongue to retort hotly when he was cut off by a frantic, warning glance from Marinall. His face flushed red, he looked down at his plate, forcing another forkful of the pudding to his lips. It tasted like cork.
Thankfully, both of these reactions were lost on Benjamin, who was too busy watching the anger and hurt cross his wife's face. "Face it, Avis," he barked, unaccustomed to such a display of defiance on her part, "the boy is nothing to look at, and he's certainly got no personality to speak of." He smiled coldly. "I wouldn't be expecting any grandchildren, if I were you."
Severus pushed his chair back violently and stood up. "Fuck you," he hissed, and before anyone could say another word, he stormed out of the room.
He would more than likely pay for that, he realized as he stomped up the steps, but he didn't care. Enough was enough. No one should have to take that kind of abuse in his own home.
Benjamin and his fucking sarcastic remarks. He would show the bastard just who would have him.
Ahh, the irony. The sweet, sweet irony.
Later that night, he waited with his heart in his mouth until he heard Avis and Benjamin's bedroom door swing shut, knowing that once it had closed, it would not be opened again until the morning.
It was time.
He crept down the hallway and quietly knocked on Marinall's door.
More A/N: I don't know who wrote the song "What A Difference A Day Makes" or what year it was copyrighted, but I do know I used the lyrics without permission.
I finally got my website up and running. You can find all of my HP fan fic there, including the NC-17 pieces I had to remove due to ff.net's new policy. Check it out and let me know what you think! http://www.100megsfree4.com/myfic/hpstuff/hptoc.html
And as always, if you liked this chapter (or even if you didn't), please let me know!