Chapter Seven: The Accidental Voyeurs

We were stuck. To open the door now and leave would incriminate us, and by the way Sirius was looking at Remus, I highly doubted they were going to keep the promise Remus had made about not using other people's rooms. Hermione squirmed.

"The window is open," I whispered.

Remus jumped. "Did you hear something?" he asked Sirius.

"No."

"Sounded like whispering."

"Probably just the wind," said Sirius. He put his arm around Remus's waist and they started kissing. I blushed.

Putting my mouth as close as I could to Hermione's ear and whispering as quietly as I could, I said, "Climbing out the window's our best bet, I think."

Sirius pulled away from Remus. "Wait a minute, now I hear something. You're right, it doesn't sound like the wind." He paused. "Is anyone in here?"

"Oh don't be ridiculous, Sirius, who would be in here?" He pulled Sirius close and kissed him so long I thought both of them would pass out from lack of oxygen. They took a step closer to the bed. At the same time, Hermione and I moved towards the window. Luckily, they didn't hear the sound.

"It's getting cold in here," said Remus. We moved another few steps, putting us right in front of the window.

"You're right. I'll shut the window."

Hermione gasped. Sirius jumped. "All right, who's in here!"

"Sirius, for God's sakes, no one is in this room but you and me. If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were getting paranoid. Now shut the window and get over here, you stud."

Hermione and I clamped our hands over our mouths, shaking with laughter. As Sirius walked towards the window, however, mirth left us and we ducked, narrowly missing his hand.

Both escape routes were gone. We had two options, and both were embarrassing: we could huddle by the window and try to avert our eyes from the activities on the bed (at that moment, both men were bare-chested and furiously kissing like there was no tomorrow), or we could show ourselves, explain and apologize, and leave. Because there was no way we would get out the door unnoticed...or maybe we could. Remus and Sirius were facing the other way and obviously very distracted. I whispered this to Hermione. She nodded, and we moved towards the door.

My hand reached out and touched the doorknob. I glanced back; they were still at it. I turned the knob.

Unfortunately, at that moment, Hermione tripped slid and fell on the tail of the cloak, which had been dragging on the floor. Exposed, we fell to the floor.

"Remus, I believe we have some visitors," said Sirius dryly. "If I didn't know better, I'd say you were getting too trusting. Hello Joanne, Hermione. Fancy meeting you here."

"Sirius..."

"It's not what it looks like...."

"Then perhaps you'd better tell us what it is," said Remus, sitting up and looking quite irritated.

"Well," began Hermione, "we'd written the list and we got bored...."

"Oh, I see, so you decided to spy on us out of boredom," said Sirius. "Not out of voyeurism or anything like that...."

"Excuse me, but we are better people than that," I said, standing up and glaring.

"I would NEVER do something like that!" exclaimed Hermione.

"Oh, so I suppose the copies of Playwitch under your bed belong to someone else?" asked Sirius.

"Look," I said, not wanting to increase the wrath of an Animagus and his were-dachshund lover, "we've acted rather childishly. We thought we'd spy on Harry and Remus getting you back over to our side. And, due to something that someone with the initials R.J.L. said, we were under the mistaken impression that you two would never use someone else's bedroom."

"I did say that, Sirius," said Remus. "Some of the fault lies with me...not much, though," he added. "I believe you aren't voyeurs, and I forgive you." He gave Sirius a pointed look.

"All right, I believe you," said Sirius wearily. "Now, could you please leave?"

"Certainly," we said in unison, and ran out the room as fast as our legs could carry us.