**The finale (well, all I'm writing anyway)**
"Welcome... to... Smackdown!" Stephanie screeched. The crowd didn't mind, however, because a genius Dawn Marie gave them out before the show (wait a minute, did I just say that?). "And, for you SMACKDOWN crowd, in your SMACKDOWN seats, I have a new set of Tag Team Champions." She paused, and then mumbled quickly. "Ignoring the ones already on RAW of course."
She called out Kurt Angle, and the fans didn't chant "You Suck" over and over again. Instead, they chose the newer and much funnier (sarcasm, people) "What?" chant after every word. SCSA was alive in their hearts, although both programs chose to ignore him now...
"I'm a freakin' gold medalist!" Kurt said. And then he said more freakin' stuff, before Chris Benoit came out. Everyone pretended he had acting ability, and tried to avoid staring at his hair. He and Angle did something they called "a stare down", but most people usually called it a Eskimo kiss, and there was a brief moment where Stephanie McMahon got hit by a big object (brilliant plan #1), fell down in a short skirt and tight top (watch the male ratings riiiiiise), and actually GOT BACK UP. After celebrating that she didn't act dead after this move, Stephanie gave a bitch slap or two (while Tazz and Michael Cole reminded the fans that these kind of bitch slaps were only on Smackdown!).
**In The Ring...**
Jamie "Hey, isn't Jamie not a redneck name?" Noble came to the ring with Nidia "didn't I win a contest because I could wrestle, not because I had lots of tongue?". He was dressed to impress, having his best tuxedo and tie on. Nidia realized this as they got to the ring, and she looked down at her full length jeans and sweater attire.
"JayyMai!" she cried. "I hate you! Let's have sex! I mean... eh, what happened to our clothes?"
He looked down, and quickly dragged her back behind the curtain. Amidst the shaking and painful noises, they changed clothes, because when they came back out, Jamie was dressed as Elvis, and Nidia was Marilyn Monroe.
"Naw, you there Memmmmfis folks, I'ma give ya an ermpression you never forget!" While the crowd was busing looking for the free Redneck Dictionary (provided with every SMACKDOWN, only on SMACKDOWN seat), he did an impression that left them all "speechless". Or bored, you pick.
**And, in the main event**
Brock Lesnar actually had a match...
....no, wait...
Kurt Angle wrestled Chris Benoit. It was (to quote someone not on SMACKDOWN, SMACKDOWN!) cool. For some reason, Tazz made a frightening discovery when Latino Heat (times two) made an appearance. That was not a mullet! It was the long neglected brother of The People's Eyebrow, and a twice removed cousin to Jericho's beard! And, like all things good, it could only be found on SMACKDOWN!
And, while Smackdown ended for that week, Stephanie McMahon sat backstage, watching old Raw tapes and counting the number of times The Undertaker used to be on. If it worked with Triple H, why wouldn't it work better on Smackdown? That was, of course, her secret to success. No, not Triple H (somewhere, Eric Bischoff got another great HHH-related idea that made him smile), it was giving The Undertaker a new gimick! He could always use a new one...
(and so goes the era of Smackdown VS Nitro... ah... no... wait, I meant Ra- .... *heavy thud, sound of Vince McMahon saying "Dammit, I hate that company!"
**The End**
"Welcome... to... Smackdown!" Stephanie screeched. The crowd didn't mind, however, because a genius Dawn Marie gave them out before the show (wait a minute, did I just say that?). "And, for you SMACKDOWN crowd, in your SMACKDOWN seats, I have a new set of Tag Team Champions." She paused, and then mumbled quickly. "Ignoring the ones already on RAW of course."
She called out Kurt Angle, and the fans didn't chant "You Suck" over and over again. Instead, they chose the newer and much funnier (sarcasm, people) "What?" chant after every word. SCSA was alive in their hearts, although both programs chose to ignore him now...
"I'm a freakin' gold medalist!" Kurt said. And then he said more freakin' stuff, before Chris Benoit came out. Everyone pretended he had acting ability, and tried to avoid staring at his hair. He and Angle did something they called "a stare down", but most people usually called it a Eskimo kiss, and there was a brief moment where Stephanie McMahon got hit by a big object (brilliant plan #1), fell down in a short skirt and tight top (watch the male ratings riiiiiise), and actually GOT BACK UP. After celebrating that she didn't act dead after this move, Stephanie gave a bitch slap or two (while Tazz and Michael Cole reminded the fans that these kind of bitch slaps were only on Smackdown!).
**In The Ring...**
Jamie "Hey, isn't Jamie not a redneck name?" Noble came to the ring with Nidia "didn't I win a contest because I could wrestle, not because I had lots of tongue?". He was dressed to impress, having his best tuxedo and tie on. Nidia realized this as they got to the ring, and she looked down at her full length jeans and sweater attire.
"JayyMai!" she cried. "I hate you! Let's have sex! I mean... eh, what happened to our clothes?"
He looked down, and quickly dragged her back behind the curtain. Amidst the shaking and painful noises, they changed clothes, because when they came back out, Jamie was dressed as Elvis, and Nidia was Marilyn Monroe.
"Naw, you there Memmmmfis folks, I'ma give ya an ermpression you never forget!" While the crowd was busing looking for the free Redneck Dictionary (provided with every SMACKDOWN, only on SMACKDOWN seat), he did an impression that left them all "speechless". Or bored, you pick.
**And, in the main event**
Brock Lesnar actually had a match...
....no, wait...
Kurt Angle wrestled Chris Benoit. It was (to quote someone not on SMACKDOWN, SMACKDOWN!) cool. For some reason, Tazz made a frightening discovery when Latino Heat (times two) made an appearance. That was not a mullet! It was the long neglected brother of The People's Eyebrow, and a twice removed cousin to Jericho's beard! And, like all things good, it could only be found on SMACKDOWN!
And, while Smackdown ended for that week, Stephanie McMahon sat backstage, watching old Raw tapes and counting the number of times The Undertaker used to be on. If it worked with Triple H, why wouldn't it work better on Smackdown? That was, of course, her secret to success. No, not Triple H (somewhere, Eric Bischoff got another great HHH-related idea that made him smile), it was giving The Undertaker a new gimick! He could always use a new one...
(and so goes the era of Smackdown VS Nitro... ah... no... wait, I meant Ra- .... *heavy thud, sound of Vince McMahon saying "Dammit, I hate that company!"
**The End**