I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S NOT BUTTER…7
Moshi!!! YAY!!! I'm continuing…let's all jump up and down! *jumping up and down all alone*….*pouts*… Anymeow…here it is…A complete fanfic based on a dinner table joke…strange no da? And writing these things sure makes me hungry…*eyes Die evilly* ENJOY! And you all better review!! I like to know what ppl think of my stuff.
Note: Did you steal my cheese?
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Chapter 17…
As we were….
Chichiri: NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO da!
Nuriko: *about to bite down*
Chichiri: *throws his poncho at Nuriko…it hits her hand causing her to drop the cake all over her pink pants*
Nuriko: *gasp* MY PANTS!!! MY FAVOURITE PANTS!!! *turns and glares evilly at Chichiri* Oooh! I'm gonna KILL you!!
Chichiri: Uh oh no da…
Nuriko: What the hell was that for?
Chichiri: Can't you see no da? Hotohori was feeding you cake made with "I can't believe it's not butter!"!!!!
Nuriko: HE WAS NOT!!! He said he's on our side now…and look! *points to a vase* He even brought me flowers! *girly happy look*
Chichiri: NO no da! You don't understand! I overheard their plan when I pretended to be him no da!
Hotohori: NO WAY! There's no way you could EVER be me. I'm too beautiful, and smart, and rich, and famous and…
Chichiri: *ignores Hotohori as he goes on* This is all part of their plan! The kid is tied to a tree outside! I bet you can SQUEEZE the truth out of him, if you get my drift no da!
Hotohori: …and tall, and athletic, and artistic, and…
Nuriko: Hmmm…*thinking* I guess that must be true…*pouts* I mean after all this time…what would 'cause Hotohori to suddenly like me…*sad look*
Chichiri: There there, homo-chan…*pats back* We all love you no da! *sweet smile*
Hotohori: …and talented, and graceful, and giving, and sweet, and admired and…
Nuriko: *rolls eyes and covers Hoto-chan's mouth* Sheesh…we get the point!
Chichiri: We should hurry to Chiriko…I have a bad feeling that Tasuki might have lit him on fire by now…
Nuriko: *nods and follows Chichiri out of the room dragging Hoto-chan along…who is still muttering all his crap*
When they get outside….
Tasuki: *has a sharp object pointed at Chiriko's throat* DIE!!!
Chichiri: STOP NO DA!!! *grabs Tasuki's hand*
Tasuki: BUT YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!!! HE SAID THAT I WAS GETTING FAT!!!
Chichiri: But he was gagged!
Tasuki: He took it off with his tongue…
Nuriko: WHA???
Chichiri: *blink blink*
Tasuki: Don't ask…
Hothori: …and modest, and sincere, and cool, and cherished, and god-like…
Tasuki: ? What's he talking about?
Nuriko: *pikus* Himself…
Tasuki: Figures…
Chiriko: HOTOHORI!!!
Hotohori: *abruptly shuts up* Huh?
Chiriko: AHEM!
Hotohori: What?
Chiriko: I'm TIED to a TREE! That's WHAT!
Hotohori: And your point is?
Chiriko: UNTIE ME YOU IDIOT!!!
Hotohori: OH!…ok!
Nuriko: *easily holds him back with one finger*
Chiriko: *pikus* I hope he didn't mention he was smart in his utterings…
Nuriko: Ok shrimp! Here's the deal…you can either eat the Lactancia™® with your own free will…OR you can wait and let us shove it viscously down your tiny, weak throat…Your choice!
Chiriko: GO TO HELL YOU HERMAPHRODITE!
Nuriko: WHAT DID HE JUST CALL ME! *pissed off* I AM NOT A HERMAPHRODITE!!!
Chiriko: I'd be surprised if you even knew what the word meant!
Nuriko: Why you little-
Tasuki: *cuts her off* See…he can be very annoying! It's not just me!
Nuriko: *pulls out a container of Lactancia™® butter from her pocket* Just for that comment…you're eating it raw!
Chiriko: NO!!! *closes mouth tight shut*
Nuriko: Give me a break…*squeezes Chiriko's mouth…it opens easily*
Chiriko: Damn you and your super human strength! Damn it to hell!
Nuriko: *pulls out a spoon and puts some butter on it* OPEN WIDE! *smile*
Chiriko: I'll let you know…even if you feed me that you'll never win! "I can't believe it's not butter!" is immortal…you're just delaying the inev---*spoon is shoved in his mouth* *gag* Urgh! *a little shadow demon escapes his mouth and he falls unconscious*
Nuriko: HA!
Hotohori: Cool…Did you see that! What was that thing that came out of his mouth? It looked like something from the exorcist or something!
Nuriko: Your turn Hoto-chan! *spoons some more butter*
Hotohori: WAIT! So when you feed me that…a little demon will come out of my mouth too?
Nuriko: *nods*
Hotohori: COOL! *opens mouth…grabs spoon…and feeds himself the butter*
Tasuki, Chichiri and Nuriko: *piku*
Hotohori: *pauses*…*nothing comes out of his mouth* HEY!! Why isn't it working! Gimme more of that! *grabs the container and shovels the butter down*…*pause*…*nothing happens* WHY ISN'T A DEMON THING COMING OUT OF MY MOUTH!!
Tasuki: Did you even eat any "I can't believe it's not butter!" in the first place?
Hotohori: *thinks about it* No…
Everyone: *falls down anime style*
Chapter 18…
Nakago: *all alone at their base* Where is everybody? IS ANYBODY HERE?
*SILENCE*
Nakago: *sniffle* Why did they leave me all alone…*sees an envelope fall at his feet* What the hell is this? *opens it and reads it*
Letter:
Dear Nakago,
We have your friends…BOTH OF THEM! Give up…you aren't going to win all alone! Just destroy the "I can't believe it's not butter!" and we won't hurt you!
-Nuriko and Co.
Nakago: NNNNNOOOOO!!! They got Hotohori AND Chiriko??? What am I going to do?
Voice: Don't give up…
Nakago: WHAT WAS THAT???
Voice: I am the essence of the "I can't believe it's not butter!" You are the only one who can save the world. They must all know about my greatest…Come to me…I will help you…
Nakago: *scared* Where do I find you?
Voice: Where else…ZELLERS!!!
Nakago: *gulp*
Meanwhile…
Chiriko: *wakes up* Wh…what…happened?
Nuriko: Huh? OH! *untying Chiriko form the tree* There you go!
Chiriko: Why was I tied to a tree?
Nuriko: Long story…to make it short…your mind was being controlled by the "I can't believe it's not butter!" so we had to use brute force to save you.
Chiriko: Oh…ok…
Hotohori: So…what now?
Tasuki: Well…there's still Nakago left. Once we get rid of him…then it'll be over…right?
Hotohori: No…not quite…
Chichiri: What do you mean no da?
Hotohori: Nakago isn't the head of "I can't believe it's not butter!"…there's someone else out there.
Nuriko: Someone else? Who?
Hotohori: *shrugs* I never met the real "head" of the operation…but I know they exist.
Nuriko: Who cares! There's no one out there that we can't handle!!!
Tasuki: *staring at Nuriko intently*
Nuriko: …*pause* …What are YOU looking at!
Tasuki: May I talk to you…ALONE!
Nuriko:… ok…*walks into the palace with Tasuki* What is it?
Tasuki: There's something about you that has been pissing me off since the day we met.
Nuriko: What?
Tasuki: You don't understand how annoying it is…
Nuriko: OK…WHAT IS IT?
Tasuki: Your pants.
Nuriko: My pants?
Tasuki: WHAT'S WITH THE PINK PANTS!
Nuriko: *confused* What's wrong with my pants?
Tasuki: THEY'RE PINK!
Nuriko: So…
Tasuki: WHO WEARS PINK PANTS?!?
Nuriko: *utters* I do….
Tasuki: NO REALLY! Who wears pink pants? Who makes pink pants? Where the hell did you get pink pants? Who likes pink anyways?
Nuriko: I do…
Tasuki: NO ONE LIKES PINK! Especially guys. EVEN GIRLS DON'T LIKE PINK! I have 4 sisters and not one of them likes pink! Where did you find those pants anyways! I've never seen a human being wear pink pants in my life…BESIDES YOU! I am shocked that there is actually a store in old China that makes pink pants…or is there?
Nuriko: *bows head with shame* No…I made them myself…
Tasuki: WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!!! PINK IS SOOOOO….SOOO…SOOO…GAY!
Nuriko: *glare* I resent that!
Tasuki: WHAT POSSESSED YOU TO WEAR THOSE PANTS! ESPECIALLY SINCE YOU WEAR THEM MOST OF THE SERIES!
Nuriko: *pissed off now* SO WHAT!! I LIKE PINK! THESE HAPPEN TO BE MY FAVOURITE PANTS TOO! YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH THAT?
Tasuki: Haven't you been listening…I DO!
Nuriko: THAT'S IT! NO ONE DISSES THE PANTS! YOU WANNA TAKE THIS OUTSIDE??
Tasuki: I DO! COME ON!! BRING IT O---*gets cut off when a pink lightning-bult suddenly hits him out of no where turning Tasuki into a charcoaled corps*
Someone in heaven with a pink mullet: *giggles girlishly*
Nuriko: That was…odd…
Meanwhile…
Nakago: *in Zellers all alone* Hello? Is anybody there? *accidentally knocks over a mannequin* Oops…
Shadowed figure sitting on a cash register: Come closer…
Nakago: *approaches* OH MY GOD! YOU!!! I can't…be…
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ANOTHER CLIFFHANGER!!! NOOO!!!! I'm so cruel…Well…I hope you enjoyed that…I couldn't resist the pink pants thing…that cracked me up the first time I watched the show…And I think I'm the only one that really noticed that! Or am I…*shifty eyes* PLEASE REVIEW!!! BAIBAI!