Dear Diary

I got in a fight with Ash today. It wasn't like our normal fights. It was worse.

It started this morning, when Ash wasn't talking to me. I was really trying to cheer him up but he didn't even smile. He wasn't even trying to fake that he was happy.

He didn't even talk to Pikachu, who still rode on his hat looking concerned the whole time.

Brock tried to get me to stay away from he. He knew that it was hopeless to get Ash to talk now, but I didn't want to give up. I didn't want to "wait awhile." It wasn't fair that he was keeping something from everyone, when we were all so worried about him.

When we were preparing to leave the pokemon center, I couldn't take it anymore. I knew I should have been patient like Brock, but I felt so angry.

Ash tried to ignore me when I walked over to him, but I grabbed his shoulder and made him turn to me.

"Why won't you talk to us?!" I yelled, still holding on to his shoulders.

He looked away, and I could see something in his eyes that made me want to let go.

But I didn't. I was just too stubborn.

"Misty. It's none of your business…" he said hesitantly.

"What did that little witch do to you?!" I yelled, feeling impatient.

"Witch?" he asked softly, his face growing pale. I knew that I had figured out a small part of it.

"You know who! Vanessa!"

"Nothing!" he lied. I could tell he was lying, because he looked away when he yelled at me. I could see Brock in the corner of my eyes, shaking his head frantically trying to get me to stop.

I don't know why he didn't stop me. He probably half-hoped that Ash would actually tell me what was wrong. Sometimes the only way I could get things out of Ash was by yelling at him.

"Then why are you avoiding me?!" I yelled, surprising myself. I didn't even know I was saying it until it came out of my mouth.

"Why do you care?!" Ash yelled back, surprising me.

Then I hit him.

I didn't hit him like I usually did with my mallet when he annoyed me. I really hit him.

I don't really know what Ash or Brock did next, because I turned around and ran away as soon as I realized what I did.

I haven't been out since. I know that I've probably ruined my friendship with Ash. I don't even know why I hit him. I just felt a flash of anger, and then…. I acted.

I just know now that I don't want to come out.

I know I'll have to eventually, but I'm not looking forward to it.