Chapter 3: The Letter That Changed Everything

I knew about the wizarding school called Hogwarts. Both of my parents had gone there and were fully qualified wizards. But all along I'd assumed that I'd never be able to go, because I couldn't go to primary school. I'd never even given any thought to going to Hogwarts, in fact I never planned to be able to do anything with my life. I was an outcast. I didn't belong in the normal world with the normal people. My parents never mentioned Hogwarts to me, but I know they knew that I'd never be able to go.

One evening, I was alone in my room, reading, when I heard a tapping noise on my window. Startled, I went to see what it was. I found that it was an owl, which was most unusual. I never got mail. I took the letter from the owl, who ruffled its wings and flew back out of the window. I opened the letter and read.

Dear Mr. Lupin,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.

Term begins on September 1. We await your owl by no later than July 31.

Yours Sincerely,

Minerva McGonagall

Deputy Headmistress

For a few seconds, I was excited. I could go to Hogwarts! Then I remembered the reason why I wasn't going to school now. How could I go if I had to put up with changing every full moon? People would find out and they'd hate me, just as those at my primary school did. I was ready to toss the letter into the trash can, when I noticed another letter that seemed to have just magically appeared with the first one.

Dear Remus,

Hello. I know you are concerned about coming to Hogwarts with your condition, but I assure you that I have a plan for you. You will be safe to come if you would like, and no one except for the faculty here at Hogwarts will ever know anything about it. I hope you will attend. I look forward to having you as a student. Your father and mother did quite well and I'm certain you will, too. I encourage your attendance.

Sincerely,

Albus Dumbledore

Headmaster

I wasted no time in showing my parents the letters. My mother frowned at the idea of me going away to school. My father, on the other hand, insisted that I go.

"Sarah," I'd heard him say to my mother once. "Remus, no matter what he is, has got to learn to get along in this world. He's going to be on his own someday and if he doesn't learn magic, then what will be left for him? Besides, I think he'll have fun at Hogwarts. We always did. It'll get his mind off of his problem. Who knows, maybe he'll even make some friends. The boy could use a few friends. Dumbledore is very trustworthy and he gave us his word that Remus would be safe. In fact, I should pay the headmaster a visit anyway, so I'll speak to him tomorrow. And Remus will be going."

It was that simple. My father said I was going, and I was going. I was really nervous. I wanted to be able to go, don't get me wrong, but I just wished that I could be normal. Instead I had to constantly worry about when it was full moon and how to make sure I wouldn't kill anyone. If anyone ever found out about me being a werewolf, my days at Hogwarts would be over. Suddenly, I didn't want to go.

"Dad," I'd said one evening in early August. "Do I have to go to Hogwarts?" My dad sighed.

"Remus," he began. "I think it's best that you go. You need to learn. You can't shut yourself away from the real world your whole life. Dumbledore will make sure you're safe. Now will you please go, for your mother and I?" I nodded reluctantly.

"I guess so."

"Good, now time for bed. Run along."

I spent the rest of summer worried. I didn't want to go. I just didn't want to. And no one would listen to me.

About a week before school began, my dad and I went shopping in a place called Diagon Alley for my school supplies. I'd been there a few times before, but I wasn't familiar with it. First we bought my books at a store called Flourish and Blotts. While there, I met another kid who would be going to Hogwarts.

He was a skinny, black haired, greasy looking kid, a little taller than me with a long pointed nose and big ears that stuck out. A sneer played across his bony features. I didn't like him from the moment I saw him.

"So, you're going to Hogwarts, huh?" he asked.

"Yeah," I replied.

"Severus Snape." The boy introduced himself.

"Remus Lupin," I stuck out my hand. "Nice to meet you."

"I hope I'm in Slytherin, how about you?" he said. My dad had told me about Slytherin. It was the house that all of the bad wizards had been in when they went to Hogwarts.

"I hope I'm in Gryffindor or Ravenclaw," I said. "Those were my parents' houses."

"Oh," Severus said in a voice that sounded as though those houses weren't good. I made a face. "So you are a pureblood then?"

"Yeah, what's that matter?" I asked.

"Oh, well you know, halfbloods are never as good at magic," he sneered. I frowned. "Well, I'd better be going," he said suddenly. "See you at school."

"Yeah, see you," I mumbled. I finished buying my books and we left. After that we bought my cauldron, then my uniform. After that, my dad had a surprise for me. He bought me my own owl. It was a large brown barn owl. I named him Jeremy, after my grandfather who I was also named after. Then there was only one thing left to buy, my wand.

We entered Ollivanders, the wand shop. Mr. Ollivander was a strange elderly man. He knew me when we entered.

"Remus Lupin, yes, I've been expecting you," he said. "And Chris," he spoke to my father. "Seems it was just yesterday that you were here buying your wand. Oak, unicorn hair, 11 ½ inches. How is it?"

"It does its job well," my father replied.

"Well, Remus, are you ready to get your wand?" Mr. Ollivander asked me.

"I guess so," I replied. He handed me a wand. I looked at it. What was I supposed to do?

"Wave it around," said Mr. Ollivander. "Go on." Feeling nervous and a little dumb, I gave the wand a small wave. Nothing happened. Mr. Ollivander wasted no time in taking that wand and placing the next in my hand. Again, nothing happened. This happened at least twenty more times. Mr. Ollivander looked confused and my father looked a little concerned. Great, I thought. I'm probably not really a wizard. Just another disappointment for me. It was nothing unusual. I was used to having things not work out. After a while you just get to the point where you don't even care. You lose all hope and it doesn't even matter anymore. But I wanted to be a wizard, I really did.

Mr. Ollivander looked at me thoughtfully. He took my left hand and placed a wand in it. I waved it around and sparks flew from the end.

"Why didn't you tell me you were left handed?" Mr. Ollivander smiled slightly, and my dad laughed. I blushed, feeling foolish.

"I didn't know you had to use the hand you write with," I admitted.

"Well, that's quite all right," said Mr. Ollivander. "We found your wand. Let's see, maple and dragon heartstring, 9 3/4 inches." He placed the wand back in its box and my dad paid for it. After that we used floo powder to arrive back at our house.

Full moon was nearing and so was the day I'd go to Hogwarts. Full moon was only two days earlier. My parents had written Dumbledore and asked him if I could go to school late, but he had said that I needed to be there on time because of getting sorted. The sorting could happen only one day a year, so I had to be there on time. Everything was really getting to me. I kept on thinking how hard it would be to keep people from finding out about me being a werewolf. It would be impossible. How could I keep that from everyone? How could I keep something so huge a secret? Surely someone would find out, and if they did--well I didn't even want to think about that. Everyday, I asked my parents if I had to go. And everyday they told me that I had to. I knew my mother wanted to let me stay home, but my father wouldn't allow it. He said I was going and there was no arguing. I knew he was right. I did have to go. I wanted to be a wizard and I wanted to go to a new school and meet new friends. But the problem was, I wasn't normal. I was different. I was a werewolf. One night out of every month I was something different. But that one night that I could be dangerous was enough to turn everyone against me. Was it really worth living like this? I thought that more and more often lately.