Chapter 32: Aftermath

"James!" cried Lily, rushing towards him. "Voldemort! Voldemort's here! He had us! Where are Sirius and Erin?"

"They're back in the woods!" I shouted. "With Voldemort." Dumbledore looked at the two of us, and without any consideration of whether or not we were telling the truth, he ran quickly into the forest and out of sight.

"Voldemort had you?" said James, his jaw dropping. He didn't wait for an answer. "We should go help Dumbledore find Sirius and Erin." I tried to agree, but collapsed to the ground with no hope of standing again. If Lily hadn't been using James for support, she'd have done the same. Just then, Dumbledore appeared at the edge of the forest, guiding two stretchers with his wand. By the solemn look on his face and the twinkle absent in his eye, I could tell that something was wrong.

"What is it, Dumbledore?" asked James, when he saw that tears were streaming down Dumbledore's cheeks. "They're not…?" He didn't finish the question. Dumbledore sighed and nodded.

"Erin has died," he said quietly. We fell silent, as the realization struck us. "Sirius is unconscious, and there's no telling whether or not he'll make it."

"I can't believe this!" shouted James hysterically. "I should have figured it out sooner! I should have gotten help! It's all my fault!"

"You mustn't think that way," said Dumbledore.

"What happened to Voldemort?" asked James.

"He's long gone by now," replied Dumbledore, as he waved his wand to put Lily and I on stretchers as well. "And he's not someone that any of us want to go looking for." I drifted off to sleep before we arrived back at the castle.

The next evening, I awoke in the infirmary. Memories of what had happened crept back into my mind slowly, like recalling a nightmare. I opened my eyes to find the curtains around my bed pulled shut. I thought of Sirius. I wanted to know if he was okay. I heard voices.

"Do you think he's going to make it?" I recognized the voice as James'.

"We're doing everything we can," said Madam Pomfrey. "There's no telling for sure just yet though."

"What about Remus?" I recognized another voice as Lily's.

"Oh, he'll be just fine with some rest," said Madam Pomfrey. "Perhaps I should check on him now." I heard the curtains of my bed being pulled back.

"Remus!" exclaimed James and Lily when they saw me awake.

"Are you all right?" asked James.

"Erin and Sirius," I moaned. Lily burst into tears and buried her face in James' shoulder.

"Remus," said James. "Erin died yesterday, don't you remember?"

"No," I said. "She can't be dead. She's fine." Lily sobbed louder. I knew I was kidding myself. I remembered hearing Dumbledore say that Erin was dead.

"What about Sirius?" I asked.

"Oh, he'll be fine. Don't you worry, Moony. Ol' Padfoot will pull through, he always does," said James. Lily sobbed even louder. I wanted nothing more than to go back to sleep and escape the terrible truth that was haunting my reality. I drifted off for a while and when I awoke it was late. Lily and James had gone, and I once again recalled what had happened. Only this time, I was all alone. A shiver ran down my spine. I dozed throughout the night, waking every once in a while to recall the high pitched cackling laughter, or see Sirius knocked to the ground by a flash of green light, or feel the pain of the crucio curse. When morning finally came, I was still exhausted. I managed to sleep for most of the day, waking that evening when James, Lily, and Peter came to visit. Lily's eyes were still red with tears, and Peter and James didn't look much better.

"How ya doin, Moony?" Peter forced a smile.

"All right I guess," I replied.

"Classes start again tomorrow," said Lily.

"Yes they do," said Madam Pomfrey, who'd just entered the room. "You seem to be doing a lot better, Remus. What would you say to going back to your dorm room for tonight, and going to classes tomorrow?"

"Please," I agreed. Anything that would take my mind off of what had happened was good enough for me.

"Oh, guess who's here?" said James, with a slight smile. He motioned to the other side of the room, where I couldn't see. Someone walked over. It was Addi, with a tear-stained face. She was shaking all over, but she managed to force a smile.

"Hi Remus," she said quietly.

"Hi," I replied.

"How are you feeling?" she asked, taking my hand.

"Oh, I'll be fine," I replied.

"I- I'm staying here until…until Sirius…well, until he gets better," she said, and I knew what she was thinking. What if Sirius didn't get better? Apparently there was still a good chance that he wouldn't survive.

"Okay, kids," said Madam Pomfrey. "Why don't you help Remus back to his dorm now?"

"Okay," said James. "See you again soon, Madam Pomfrey," he added, motioning towards Sirius' bed. I stood up, feeling a bit light-headed, but better than before. We slowly walked out of the infirmary and into the hallway. I walked behind James, Lily and Peter with Addi. I slipped my arm around her shoulder and bent down so that I could talk to her.

"Are you all right?" I asked quietly.

"I'm fine," she said, muffling a sob.

"It's okay," I said. "Sirius will be fine. I'm sure of it." She nodded and sobbed again. We arrived back at the Common Room and entered through the picture of the fat lady.

"I think we all need rest now," said Lily. I pulled Addi into a long hug.

"Every thing will be fine," I whispered. "Don't worry." She nodded, but tears streamed down her cheeks. I wiped them away, but realized that I was crying too.

"Good night, Addi" I said.

"Good night," she answered. She and Lily headed up the stairs to the girls' dorm rooms, both of them crying. I turned to James and Peter.

"I just can't believe this is happening," I said. They both nodded silently. We entered our dorm room and went to sleep.

Sirius was still in a coma when it was time for Erin's funeral. All the rest of us attended with Dumbledore, but it's not something that I like to think about. And I felt so badly for Sirius, because I didn't even know if he knew she'd died, and he'd never see her again.

For the next month, time passed by more slowly than ever. We spent every free second in the infirmary, and Addi, who wasn't taking any classes of course, spent every waking second by Sirius' side. It just wasn't the same without Sirius around, and we feared that he wouldn't survive. After a few weeks, when we were feeling a little better, we all showed Addi around the castle. She was fascinated by all of the magical things, and it helped to take our minds off of what had happened. Except for when she would mention that Sirius had told her about whatever we were showing her. Then we'd all grow silent and the terrible tragedy would flood our memories once more.

One evening, all of us were in the infirmary, like normal, sitting in chairs around Sirius' bedside. Madam Pomfrey came to talk to us.

"I hate to be the one to tell you this," she began. "But it doesn't look like Sirius is going to make it."

"What do you mean, not going to make it?" asked James. "He's held out this long. And you told us last week that his condition was improving a lot!"

"Yes, but it's been nearly five weeks, and he's shown very little signs of ever coming out of the coma. His heart rate is lower than it's been since the attack happened…"

"Sirius!" shouted James, jumping from his chair, and knocking over Lily, who'd been leaning on him. "You're alive!" We glanced down at Sirius. His eyes were open and he was staring up at us.

"Sirius!" we all shouted. Peter stood up, and tripped over Lily, who was still sprawled out on the floor. Then Peter stood again, and fell backwards, almost knocking me over. This created a lot of noise, and Sirius moaned.

"I can't believe you're awake, Sirius!" exclaimed Addi.

"We thought you might not make it," I explained.

"How long have I been here?" asked Sirius.

"Over a month," said Lily.

"Damn!" said Sirius.

"Oh Sirius, I was so afraid you'd died!" exclaimed Addi. "Hagrid came to Clearglen to bring me here, and I burst right out crying in the middle of my class!" Sirius laughed.

"I'm fine," he said. We all hugged each other for a long time. Then I noticed Sirius' expression change.

"Where's Erin?" he asked. We all glanced to one another.

"Uh, Padfoot, don't you remember?" I asked. Sirius thought for a moment.

"The curse was meant for me!" he cried. Just then, Dumbledore and Madam Pomfrey returned, ordering all of us to go to bed and let Sirius rest.

A week later, Sirius returned to classes with us, and Addi had to leave and go back to her school. Sirius acted perfectly normal. On his first day back, he tortured Snape and Lockhart, covered the hallway with dungbombs, blew up his shrinking potion, and earned one detention. James, Peter and I secretly worried about him. He was acting too normal for everything that had happened. We'd never even seen him cry about Erin. For about two weeks, things seemed perfectly normal, except Erin was missing. But I had a hollow feeling inside, like I was living in a nightmare and couldn't wake up.