Summary: A moment of passion changes everything for Max and Alec.

Disclaimer: I own them in my dreams.

A/N: To those that reviewed the last 4 chapters Thank You, you guys totally rock. You are my inspiration to complete this story. Anyway this is the final chapter, I can only hope I've done it justice. Please let me know what you think.

Without You, I Am Nothing

(Recap)

I am ignored

I am bypassed

I am overlooked

Without you

I am nothing

I am feared

I am scared

I am mocked

Without you

I am nothing

I have none

But myself

I am not enough

I can never be enough

Without you

I am nothing

I am in pain

I am pain

I am hurt

I am hurting

Without you

I am nothing

I am despised

I am scorned

I am ridiculed

Without you

I am nothing

I am excluded

I am colourless

I am insipid

Without you

I am nothing

I have no love

I have no lover

Without you

I am nothing

I am here but I may as well not be

I am not seen

I am not heard

I am not liked

Without you

I am nothing

I am dying

I am death

I am dead

Without you

I am Nothing

Alec's Story

I slam on the brakes & swing the car round heading back to Seattle, back to Max. 'Alec, please help me' I can hear the words as clearly as if Max was sitting in the car with me. I swing a quick glance to the right, seeing nothing. Am I loosing it? Is this how it started with Ben.

Then I hear it again a plea straight from the heart so full of pain and urgency I almost gag. My heart pounds painfully in my chest & I tighten my grip on the steering wheel. I breathe deeply, trying to centre myself, trying to concentrate on the road ahead as I push the car to its limit. It groans in protest.

After what seems like eternity I find myself on the outskirts of Seattle. Memories attack me, threatening to overwhelm me, 'last night was a mistake, it should never have happened', I'm sorry I let you out of Manticore, I'm sorry I inflicted you on the world'. 'I should have let your head explode when I had the chance'. 'I don't want to be like you'. 'You are Nothing 494, Nothing'.

No, I punch the dashboard in frustration. I won't let them win not again, this time it's different before I wasn't strong enough; I didn't fight hard enough. I didn't understand.

This time I won't be led by my insecurities. This time I am the one in control for I've realised something, sure Max pushed me away, but that's not what made me leave.

I wasn't running from Max, I was running away from my fears, the fear that I wasn't good enough, that I was unworthy of love, that I was Nothing. Stupid right no matter how hard you try you can't outrun yourself. I welcome all the feelings, embracing them with open arms, no more running it's time to face up & deal.

Max's Story

I look down at the City beneath me, but I see nothing. The wind gusts violently around me but I can neither feel nor hear it. It's as if I've lost all physical sensation.

My first thought when I awoke from the blackness was to go after him, but where would I start, the world's a big place. Instead I headed for something familiar, seeking comfort, which is why I'm here at the Needle.

Waiting & hoping against all hope that if I sit here long enough Alec will come back to me. I don't know how long I've been here, but I'll wait for eternity if I have to. The thought of continuing with this travesty that I call a life without him does not bear thinking about.

I wait on watching as the sky turns from inky blackness to smoky grey, clinging to my faith in Alec with every part of my being. Secure in the knowledge that he will come back to me.

&

Still I wait.

Alec's & Max's Story (Max's Story is in Bold Italics)

I see the Space Needle encroach on my line of vision and am out of the car & running towards it before the car comes to a stop.

I blur up the stairs, moving in the direction that my heart has led me, adrenaline pushing me on as I plunge through the doorway. My body shaking with terror & then I see her.

Crouched down hanging over the edge of the needle her posture defeated and weary.

Time stops, no sound, no movement, silence, it's like a time warp after my frantic movements of only moments before.

I hold my breath as she raises her head, her eyes locking with mine. The next move is hers.

I sense him before I see him, I turn so swiftly I almost loose my balance, and then our eyes meet, time stands still as I search his eyes.

I hold her gaze as her eyes search mine, boring into her leaving her no place to hide. I watch as her mouth opens she is trying to form words, but no sound comes out.

I cannot speak what would I say, how could I even begin to explain away the pain I have caused him. I have no excuses to offer, there's been far to many of those already.

In 2 strides I break the distance between us & throw myself into his arms. Automatically his arms reach out wrapping around me. The contact with his warm solid flesh is indescribable & releases the tears that I have been fighting so hard to hold back.

He leans down & catches my tears with his lips, the action so gentle it makes me cry even harder.

Her fragile body trembles in my arms, acting on instinct I reach for her hand and gently place it against my heart, all the while holding her eyes with mine.

I feel his heart beating as I read his eyes, without loosing that contact I take his free hand and place it against my heart. Time is suspended as our hearts beat in unison & we communicate in a language older, stronger more powerful than words.

& Then

Our lips meet in the sweetest of all kisses, a kiss that goes on and on until I cannot tell where I end and she begins. It as it should be, finally we are as one.

The End

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