Disclaimer: Tomorrow I will own LoK and its characters! Well, I won't, but
I ca dream
___________________________________________________
The scene is Kain's throne, and the Lieutenants and Faustus are wondering around
bored because they lost the script
Zephon: I bored!
Raziel: You never had a long attention span anyway!
Dumah: (punching the Pillars) I will eventually break this Pillar of Conflict! (punches
harder) Ow! Damn it! Okay, maybe I will never break this Pillar.
Rahab: Hey, I've got an idea! Let's see who can through Melchiah's head the farthest!
Melchiah: The record so far is 30 yards.
Faustus: I bet I can win that.
Raziel: I'll kick your ass Faustus!
Dumah: Let me!
(then while they were fighting, Turel came over, took Melchiah's head and threw it a
good 45 yards)
Raziel: (while biting Faustus' hand) Damn!
(then Melchiah's head slams into the Pillar of Conflict, knocking it down. Then
Melchiah's head came rolling back to his body)
Rahab: Oh crap..
Zephon: (extremely terrified) Oh no, dad's gonna kill us!
(then Kain and the Seer came in, but nobody noticed them)
Faustus: I'm not afraid of that fashionably challenged moron. He's just a little girl in big
boy pants!
Raziel: Oh ho ho. That's a good one.
Faustus: Thank you.
Kain: (behind him) AHAHAHAHAHA! That was a good one!
Faustus: He's behind me?
Raziel: Yes.
Faustus: (turns around and faces Kain) Hey buddy!
Kain: (in a cheery tone) Hey! That really was funny! These are big boy pants huh!?
(the Seer carefully watched what happens then sees Melchiah)
Seer: It's him! (then Melchiah's arm fell off, then the Seer ran right in front of Melchiah)
I'll get that for you. (bends down in front of Melchiah then retrieves his arm, then says
in a very seductive voice) You better watch your limbs, hot stuff.
Melchiah: (in sheer amazement) !
(back at the Pillars, everyone was trying to explain what happened)
Kain: (in a calm and cheerful voice) Can't we all just get along?
(that, of course, stopped everyone. Then the Seer came up)
Seer: I fixed him.
Zephon: OH MY LORD, NOW HE REALLY IS GONNA BE STERILE!
Kain: (laughing) Son, you are a fine, young man!
Seer: No, not like that. I cured him with treatment. He's always relaxed.
Kain: (grinning proudly) And whenever I start to think of bad things, I just think of
butterflies and flowers and I get all warm inside!
Dumah: Aw damn it! Now we've got another Janos!
Kain: Janos is a fine gentle lad. You people need to be like him!
Melchiah: Are you okay, dada?
Seer: Oh, he is fiiiiiiine.
Zephon: I think she's talking about you, Melchiah.
Melchiah: Is she? (then his bottom jaw fell off)
Dumah: AHAHAHA! Now Dumah's become Raziel!
Seer: I'll get that for you. (bends down again, revealing as much cleavage as possible,
then runs her fingers across the teeth of his bottom jaw) Well, I have to leave for now,
but I'll be back. (turns to Melchiah) Especially for you.
(then the Seer leaves, standing them with the new and improved Kain)
Kain: Well, it looks like you're the ladies' man Melchiah. And you should be, who
couldn't be attracted to my handsome son?
Raziel: Ok, here what Kain would've said before therapy:
Before therapy Kain: Melchiah, who could be attracted to you? I mean, your limbs fall off and that isn't right! Oddball.
Raziel: And now Kain is..nice. I'm not sure if I'm ready for this.
(and so things went as normal, with the exception of Kain. Kain visited Zephon's clan)
Kain: How's my favorite son?
Zephon: I think Raziel left.
Kain: I'm talking about you, my silly little rascal!
Zephon: What???
Kain: You are so talented. Your acting is good.
Zephon: But you hated me playing the girls parts!
Kain: You get to see the girls naked that way. That's my sly, lovable son.
Zephon: You know, dressing up like a girl can be a Zen-like experience.
Kain: (in an almost overly cheerful voice) I just might do that! I love you son!
(then Kain went looking for Rahab. Kain was wearing a pink mini-skirt, a tank-top that
was pretty and pink and was frilly, he also had on Barbie tennis shoes, and had all of
his hair in different shaped pig-tails. He finally got to Rahab, who was reading a book.
Rahab saw how he looked and nearly choked)
Rahab: Dad???
Kain: How's the smartest son in the whole wide world?
Rahab: (kind of scared) Fine.
Kain: Good. Could I ask you a favor?
Rahab: Sure.
Kain: Could you teach me how to read?
Rahab: (started choking) What?
Kain: Please teach me how to read. I wanna read big books like that one! (points to the
50-page book Rahab has)
Rahab: Um..sure.
Kain: (jumping up and down, excited) Yay! (got down the Rahab, and looked at the
book) What's that word?
Rahab: That word is 'am'.
Kain: (hyper and excited) Am! Am! Am! I KNOW HOW TO READ 'AM;!!! WOO-HOO! I
GOTTA TELL EVERYBODY! (then Kain runs off)
(Kain runs past Melchiah's room where Melchiah and the Seer are making out, then
Kain spots something)
Kain: Hey, Melchiah, you dropped your index finger!
Melchiah: (talking a best he could cause part of his mouth fell on the Seer) Thanks dad!
Kain: Guess what!? I KNOW HOW TO READ THE WORD 'AM'! YAY!
(then Kain runs down the hallway screaming: I KNOW THE WORD 'AM'! to everyone
and everything he passed. He eventually got to Dumah)
Kain: Hey my stong, muscular boy whom I'm so proud of!
Dumah: (sees Kian's appearance) ? Um..!
Kain: I can read the word 'am'! Hey, on my way here, I saw a dog that was covered in
mud because it was digging its nose in the mud! Let's go play with the doggie!
Dumah: (dumbstruck) ???
Kain: Let's go play with the doggie!
Dumah: I'm sorry, but I'm busy.
Kain: Oh yeah, I wanna give you this. (pulls out a trophy that says 'Stongest being in
Nosgoth'. Dumah was about to cry with joy as Kain gives him the award)
Dumah: (while starting to cry) I've wanted this since..gosh, since I became a
vampire. (then Dumah can't hold it in anymore and starts to cry from joy) I LOVE YOU
DADDY! LET'S GO PLAY WITH THE DOGGIE!
(after Kain and Dumah played with the muddy dog, both getting mud all over each
other, Kain ran off to find Turel)
Turel: I should be on Broadway. (starts to sing, even though he doesn't know most of
the words) Tonight, tonight, something, something tonight!
(Kain comes rushing in after hearing him sing)
Kain: You beautiful singing man! That singing is so beautiful, it moves me to tears!
Turel: Hey daddy. What should I sing for my Broadway audition?
Kain: This may not be Broadway material, but it's become my favorite song ever since
I've become relaxed. (starts singing with a surprisingly beautiful voice)
(Kain singing) There's got to be a morning afteeeeeer
If we can hold onto the niiiiiiiiight
There's a chance to find the sunshine (stops singing) Can't remember the rest.
Turel: That was awesome! You're a great daddy!
Kain: I am so proud of you! There isn't a sweeter voice than yours! (then Kain hugs
Turel) I love you, son.
(the scene is now Raziel's clan area, and Raziel and the other brothers are there)
Raziel: Ok, something must be done. Kain's been running around in girl's clothes and
playing with muddy dogs. We must get Kain back to his old self again!
Dumah: What!? No!
Turel: Yeah, he's better this way!
Raziel: But this is what he'd want! (then Kain entered) Hey Kain!
Kain: Raz, can I speak to you in private?
Raziel: Sure.
Zephon: Although I hate to admit it, you're right Raziel. We'll be forming a plan while
you talk to dad.
(then Kain and Raziel go to a private place. Kain goes behind Raziel)
Kain: Your wings are so beautiful. (then Kain gets in front of Raziel and Kain gets on his
knees) Please forgive me for throwing you into the abyss.
Raziel: !!!
Kain: Here. (Kain gave Raziel some feathers from Janos' wings) I am so proud of you.
You have achieved so much that I never could.
Raziel: I LOVE MY DADDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(then Raziel returns back to his brothers)
Rahab: We have come up with a sure-fire plan to get dad's old self back!
Raziel: Screw that! My daddy's cool!
(it became night time at Nosgoth)
Kain: (shouting to the lieutenants) BATH TIME!
(they all came running)
Zephon: Bath time! Yippie, hooray!
Dumah: I love bath time!
(the bath was a pool of blood)
Turel: (singing) My dad is my best friend, I love him to..
Kain: (continuing) ..we'll always be together! (then the lieutenants got into their
baths) I love this feeling. It makes me want to sing! Don't forget your rubber ducky and
rubber human heads!
Zephon: (in the bath) This ducky is my friend!
(then late at night, Dumah suddenly woke up and screamed and started crying because
he had had a bad dream)
Duamh: Waaahhhh! (crying) (then Kain rushed in in his teletubbies pajamas)
Kain: I love these pajamas ever since I became calm and relaxed. What is it son?
Dumah: I had a bad dream.
Kain: (holding Dumah to his chest) Hush little Dumah don't say a word, Kainy's gonna
by you a maiming bird, and if that maiming bird don't maim, Kain's gonna send it back
for a refund at a retail price.
Dumah: I love you daddy.
(Little did they know that they definitely should've cured their father)
VENGENCE
(the next morning, Kain awoke feeling like he had been hit by a..um..something
big and mean. Kain looked to his left hand and there was a tag that read: 'I hope you
liked the treatment trial. If you want to continue this treatment, come see me, the Seer,
and if you didn't like what happened, you'll get a refund. Images jumped into Kain's
head about what happened the other day)
Kain: Oh, they will pay.
(it was afternoon till Kain came out to find his sons, and Kain's first victim would be
Zephon)
Kain: (walking into Zephon's room) Hello Zephon.
Zephon: Hey, my daddy! I love you!
Kain: Hey my son who was born on the planet 'I'm an Idiot'.
Zephon: That was so funny.
Kain: Yeah. Oh, and I gave Umah your address, so feel free to thank me later!
Zephon: (looking a little concerned) You okay, daddy?
Kain: (grinning evilly) Never felt better.
(Kain then left and headed for Rahab. He found Rahab reading a book)
Kain: Hey Rehab.
Rahab: You mean Rahab?
Kain: (faking surprise) Oh, I'm sorry. Didn't mean to call you Rehab. Oh, you're reading
a book?
Rahab: Yes. You wanna learn a new word?
Kain: Oh, sure. Can I show you the word? (Kain took out a book he borrowed from
Vorador. You know the kind. Points to a word) What's that word?
Rahab: !!! I don't need to see that, you don't need to know!
Kain: Okay, bye. (Kain left with the book, secure in the fact that he might have mentally
scarred Rahab. Kain then found Melchiah still asleep, so he took out Melchiah's mouth
and replaced it with an air filter) Now all I have to do is set a magnet and he'll be stuck
to the floor!
(After setting the magnet, Kain ran over to Dumah who was exercising. Kain saw this
and came over and waved at Dumah)
Kain: (fake cheerfulness) Well hey Dumah!
Dumah: Hey dad!
Kain: (sees that Dumah is holding a 500 ton barbell in the air) Man, you sure look
strong. Catch! (Kain picks up a 600 ton barbell, which hits Dumah, resulting in the 500
ton barbell falling on Dumah. Kain left for Turel. He found Turel in his room singing.
Turel didn't even know Kain had entered)
Turel: (singing along to the CD that was playing, which was also Turel's favorite CD-it
had a mix of tons of songs he loved) You can't touch this! You can't tou- (then the music
became weird and unintelligible) What!?
Kain: (while scratching the CD) Oops. I tripped. (then Kain left for Raziel)
(When Kain encountered Raziel, Raziel was thankfully asleep. Kain took this opportunity
too write 'I am gay' and the left wing and 'My nuts got burned away' on his right wing,
then Kain left, awaiting the time when everyone discovered that Kain had done these
mean things on purpose)
(10 minutes later)
Kain: (while sitting on his throne saw everyone but Zephon come in) (evil grin) Hello
everyone.
Rahab: I am scarred for life.
Kain: Sorry Rehab.
Melchiah: (dragging around a pole that's stuck to his fake mouth) ..! ..?
Kain: What, speak louder, I can't hear you!
Dumah: (covered in Band-Aids) Ouch you bastard!
Kain: Aw..
Raziel: Not funny! (then the others laughed at Raziel's wings)
Turel: Well, the right is true. Anyway, Kain destroyed my CD!
Raziel: Where's Zephon?
Zephon (off-screen): I'm not decent!
Kain: Come on in! Hey, does anyone know what happened to Faustus?
(Zephon crept in, completely naked but covering himself with his hands)
Zephon: Umah stole all my clothes! Sour loser. Why'd you do this!?
Kain: Why didn't you save me?
Raziel: Oh, damn it!
(Faustus then walks in and sees the commotion)
Faustus: Hey, Zephon's naked! (to Zephon) Hey, there's a strip club that you can go to
and make 20$ an hour, I'm sure you'd work out.
Kain: Guess what Faustus?
Faustus: What?
Kain: I'm the sexiest thing! Look at the pole. Raz is in 2nd and you 3rd. You counted the
votes wrong.
Faustus: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (then runs off to go cry)
Kain: Well, boys. What has this taught you?
Raziel: (scared) Don't screw with Kain.
Zephon: I'm cold.
Kain: Don't screw with me; I'm a badass! And sexy! We film TOMORROW!
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Well, this idea about therapy and revenge came to me all of a sudden, and I thought I'd write it down. The moral of the story: Don't fu** with Kain. Vae Victus! Hope you enjoyed and review please. The next chapter will be the quest to find Vorador.
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The scene is Kain's throne, and the Lieutenants and Faustus are wondering around
bored because they lost the script
Zephon: I bored!
Raziel: You never had a long attention span anyway!
Dumah: (punching the Pillars) I will eventually break this Pillar of Conflict! (punches
harder) Ow! Damn it! Okay, maybe I will never break this Pillar.
Rahab: Hey, I've got an idea! Let's see who can through Melchiah's head the farthest!
Melchiah: The record so far is 30 yards.
Faustus: I bet I can win that.
Raziel: I'll kick your ass Faustus!
Dumah: Let me!
(then while they were fighting, Turel came over, took Melchiah's head and threw it a
good 45 yards)
Raziel: (while biting Faustus' hand) Damn!
(then Melchiah's head slams into the Pillar of Conflict, knocking it down. Then
Melchiah's head came rolling back to his body)
Rahab: Oh crap..
Zephon: (extremely terrified) Oh no, dad's gonna kill us!
(then Kain and the Seer came in, but nobody noticed them)
Faustus: I'm not afraid of that fashionably challenged moron. He's just a little girl in big
boy pants!
Raziel: Oh ho ho. That's a good one.
Faustus: Thank you.
Kain: (behind him) AHAHAHAHAHA! That was a good one!
Faustus: He's behind me?
Raziel: Yes.
Faustus: (turns around and faces Kain) Hey buddy!
Kain: (in a cheery tone) Hey! That really was funny! These are big boy pants huh!?
(the Seer carefully watched what happens then sees Melchiah)
Seer: It's him! (then Melchiah's arm fell off, then the Seer ran right in front of Melchiah)
I'll get that for you. (bends down in front of Melchiah then retrieves his arm, then says
in a very seductive voice) You better watch your limbs, hot stuff.
Melchiah: (in sheer amazement) !
(back at the Pillars, everyone was trying to explain what happened)
Kain: (in a calm and cheerful voice) Can't we all just get along?
(that, of course, stopped everyone. Then the Seer came up)
Seer: I fixed him.
Zephon: OH MY LORD, NOW HE REALLY IS GONNA BE STERILE!
Kain: (laughing) Son, you are a fine, young man!
Seer: No, not like that. I cured him with treatment. He's always relaxed.
Kain: (grinning proudly) And whenever I start to think of bad things, I just think of
butterflies and flowers and I get all warm inside!
Dumah: Aw damn it! Now we've got another Janos!
Kain: Janos is a fine gentle lad. You people need to be like him!
Melchiah: Are you okay, dada?
Seer: Oh, he is fiiiiiiine.
Zephon: I think she's talking about you, Melchiah.
Melchiah: Is she? (then his bottom jaw fell off)
Dumah: AHAHAHA! Now Dumah's become Raziel!
Seer: I'll get that for you. (bends down again, revealing as much cleavage as possible,
then runs her fingers across the teeth of his bottom jaw) Well, I have to leave for now,
but I'll be back. (turns to Melchiah) Especially for you.
(then the Seer leaves, standing them with the new and improved Kain)
Kain: Well, it looks like you're the ladies' man Melchiah. And you should be, who
couldn't be attracted to my handsome son?
Raziel: Ok, here what Kain would've said before therapy:
Before therapy Kain: Melchiah, who could be attracted to you? I mean, your limbs fall off and that isn't right! Oddball.
Raziel: And now Kain is..nice. I'm not sure if I'm ready for this.
(and so things went as normal, with the exception of Kain. Kain visited Zephon's clan)
Kain: How's my favorite son?
Zephon: I think Raziel left.
Kain: I'm talking about you, my silly little rascal!
Zephon: What???
Kain: You are so talented. Your acting is good.
Zephon: But you hated me playing the girls parts!
Kain: You get to see the girls naked that way. That's my sly, lovable son.
Zephon: You know, dressing up like a girl can be a Zen-like experience.
Kain: (in an almost overly cheerful voice) I just might do that! I love you son!
(then Kain went looking for Rahab. Kain was wearing a pink mini-skirt, a tank-top that
was pretty and pink and was frilly, he also had on Barbie tennis shoes, and had all of
his hair in different shaped pig-tails. He finally got to Rahab, who was reading a book.
Rahab saw how he looked and nearly choked)
Rahab: Dad???
Kain: How's the smartest son in the whole wide world?
Rahab: (kind of scared) Fine.
Kain: Good. Could I ask you a favor?
Rahab: Sure.
Kain: Could you teach me how to read?
Rahab: (started choking) What?
Kain: Please teach me how to read. I wanna read big books like that one! (points to the
50-page book Rahab has)
Rahab: Um..sure.
Kain: (jumping up and down, excited) Yay! (got down the Rahab, and looked at the
book) What's that word?
Rahab: That word is 'am'.
Kain: (hyper and excited) Am! Am! Am! I KNOW HOW TO READ 'AM;!!! WOO-HOO! I
GOTTA TELL EVERYBODY! (then Kain runs off)
(Kain runs past Melchiah's room where Melchiah and the Seer are making out, then
Kain spots something)
Kain: Hey, Melchiah, you dropped your index finger!
Melchiah: (talking a best he could cause part of his mouth fell on the Seer) Thanks dad!
Kain: Guess what!? I KNOW HOW TO READ THE WORD 'AM'! YAY!
(then Kain runs down the hallway screaming: I KNOW THE WORD 'AM'! to everyone
and everything he passed. He eventually got to Dumah)
Kain: Hey my stong, muscular boy whom I'm so proud of!
Dumah: (sees Kian's appearance) ? Um..!
Kain: I can read the word 'am'! Hey, on my way here, I saw a dog that was covered in
mud because it was digging its nose in the mud! Let's go play with the doggie!
Dumah: (dumbstruck) ???
Kain: Let's go play with the doggie!
Dumah: I'm sorry, but I'm busy.
Kain: Oh yeah, I wanna give you this. (pulls out a trophy that says 'Stongest being in
Nosgoth'. Dumah was about to cry with joy as Kain gives him the award)
Dumah: (while starting to cry) I've wanted this since..gosh, since I became a
vampire. (then Dumah can't hold it in anymore and starts to cry from joy) I LOVE YOU
DADDY! LET'S GO PLAY WITH THE DOGGIE!
(after Kain and Dumah played with the muddy dog, both getting mud all over each
other, Kain ran off to find Turel)
Turel: I should be on Broadway. (starts to sing, even though he doesn't know most of
the words) Tonight, tonight, something, something tonight!
(Kain comes rushing in after hearing him sing)
Kain: You beautiful singing man! That singing is so beautiful, it moves me to tears!
Turel: Hey daddy. What should I sing for my Broadway audition?
Kain: This may not be Broadway material, but it's become my favorite song ever since
I've become relaxed. (starts singing with a surprisingly beautiful voice)
(Kain singing) There's got to be a morning afteeeeeer
If we can hold onto the niiiiiiiiight
There's a chance to find the sunshine (stops singing) Can't remember the rest.
Turel: That was awesome! You're a great daddy!
Kain: I am so proud of you! There isn't a sweeter voice than yours! (then Kain hugs
Turel) I love you, son.
(the scene is now Raziel's clan area, and Raziel and the other brothers are there)
Raziel: Ok, something must be done. Kain's been running around in girl's clothes and
playing with muddy dogs. We must get Kain back to his old self again!
Dumah: What!? No!
Turel: Yeah, he's better this way!
Raziel: But this is what he'd want! (then Kain entered) Hey Kain!
Kain: Raz, can I speak to you in private?
Raziel: Sure.
Zephon: Although I hate to admit it, you're right Raziel. We'll be forming a plan while
you talk to dad.
(then Kain and Raziel go to a private place. Kain goes behind Raziel)
Kain: Your wings are so beautiful. (then Kain gets in front of Raziel and Kain gets on his
knees) Please forgive me for throwing you into the abyss.
Raziel: !!!
Kain: Here. (Kain gave Raziel some feathers from Janos' wings) I am so proud of you.
You have achieved so much that I never could.
Raziel: I LOVE MY DADDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(then Raziel returns back to his brothers)
Rahab: We have come up with a sure-fire plan to get dad's old self back!
Raziel: Screw that! My daddy's cool!
(it became night time at Nosgoth)
Kain: (shouting to the lieutenants) BATH TIME!
(they all came running)
Zephon: Bath time! Yippie, hooray!
Dumah: I love bath time!
(the bath was a pool of blood)
Turel: (singing) My dad is my best friend, I love him to..
Kain: (continuing) ..we'll always be together! (then the lieutenants got into their
baths) I love this feeling. It makes me want to sing! Don't forget your rubber ducky and
rubber human heads!
Zephon: (in the bath) This ducky is my friend!
(then late at night, Dumah suddenly woke up and screamed and started crying because
he had had a bad dream)
Duamh: Waaahhhh! (crying) (then Kain rushed in in his teletubbies pajamas)
Kain: I love these pajamas ever since I became calm and relaxed. What is it son?
Dumah: I had a bad dream.
Kain: (holding Dumah to his chest) Hush little Dumah don't say a word, Kainy's gonna
by you a maiming bird, and if that maiming bird don't maim, Kain's gonna send it back
for a refund at a retail price.
Dumah: I love you daddy.
(Little did they know that they definitely should've cured their father)
VENGENCE
(the next morning, Kain awoke feeling like he had been hit by a..um..something
big and mean. Kain looked to his left hand and there was a tag that read: 'I hope you
liked the treatment trial. If you want to continue this treatment, come see me, the Seer,
and if you didn't like what happened, you'll get a refund. Images jumped into Kain's
head about what happened the other day)
Kain: Oh, they will pay.
(it was afternoon till Kain came out to find his sons, and Kain's first victim would be
Zephon)
Kain: (walking into Zephon's room) Hello Zephon.
Zephon: Hey, my daddy! I love you!
Kain: Hey my son who was born on the planet 'I'm an Idiot'.
Zephon: That was so funny.
Kain: Yeah. Oh, and I gave Umah your address, so feel free to thank me later!
Zephon: (looking a little concerned) You okay, daddy?
Kain: (grinning evilly) Never felt better.
(Kain then left and headed for Rahab. He found Rahab reading a book)
Kain: Hey Rehab.
Rahab: You mean Rahab?
Kain: (faking surprise) Oh, I'm sorry. Didn't mean to call you Rehab. Oh, you're reading
a book?
Rahab: Yes. You wanna learn a new word?
Kain: Oh, sure. Can I show you the word? (Kain took out a book he borrowed from
Vorador. You know the kind. Points to a word) What's that word?
Rahab: !!! I don't need to see that, you don't need to know!
Kain: Okay, bye. (Kain left with the book, secure in the fact that he might have mentally
scarred Rahab. Kain then found Melchiah still asleep, so he took out Melchiah's mouth
and replaced it with an air filter) Now all I have to do is set a magnet and he'll be stuck
to the floor!
(After setting the magnet, Kain ran over to Dumah who was exercising. Kain saw this
and came over and waved at Dumah)
Kain: (fake cheerfulness) Well hey Dumah!
Dumah: Hey dad!
Kain: (sees that Dumah is holding a 500 ton barbell in the air) Man, you sure look
strong. Catch! (Kain picks up a 600 ton barbell, which hits Dumah, resulting in the 500
ton barbell falling on Dumah. Kain left for Turel. He found Turel in his room singing.
Turel didn't even know Kain had entered)
Turel: (singing along to the CD that was playing, which was also Turel's favorite CD-it
had a mix of tons of songs he loved) You can't touch this! You can't tou- (then the music
became weird and unintelligible) What!?
Kain: (while scratching the CD) Oops. I tripped. (then Kain left for Raziel)
(When Kain encountered Raziel, Raziel was thankfully asleep. Kain took this opportunity
too write 'I am gay' and the left wing and 'My nuts got burned away' on his right wing,
then Kain left, awaiting the time when everyone discovered that Kain had done these
mean things on purpose)
(10 minutes later)
Kain: (while sitting on his throne saw everyone but Zephon come in) (evil grin) Hello
everyone.
Rahab: I am scarred for life.
Kain: Sorry Rehab.
Melchiah: (dragging around a pole that's stuck to his fake mouth) ..! ..?
Kain: What, speak louder, I can't hear you!
Dumah: (covered in Band-Aids) Ouch you bastard!
Kain: Aw..
Raziel: Not funny! (then the others laughed at Raziel's wings)
Turel: Well, the right is true. Anyway, Kain destroyed my CD!
Raziel: Where's Zephon?
Zephon (off-screen): I'm not decent!
Kain: Come on in! Hey, does anyone know what happened to Faustus?
(Zephon crept in, completely naked but covering himself with his hands)
Zephon: Umah stole all my clothes! Sour loser. Why'd you do this!?
Kain: Why didn't you save me?
Raziel: Oh, damn it!
(Faustus then walks in and sees the commotion)
Faustus: Hey, Zephon's naked! (to Zephon) Hey, there's a strip club that you can go to
and make 20$ an hour, I'm sure you'd work out.
Kain: Guess what Faustus?
Faustus: What?
Kain: I'm the sexiest thing! Look at the pole. Raz is in 2nd and you 3rd. You counted the
votes wrong.
Faustus: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (then runs off to go cry)
Kain: Well, boys. What has this taught you?
Raziel: (scared) Don't screw with Kain.
Zephon: I'm cold.
Kain: Don't screw with me; I'm a badass! And sexy! We film TOMORROW!
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Well, this idea about therapy and revenge came to me all of a sudden, and I thought I'd write it down. The moral of the story: Don't fu** with Kain. Vae Victus! Hope you enjoyed and review please. The next chapter will be the quest to find Vorador.