Mystrana: "Ok, ok! It's time for your next big adventure!"
Cloud:(happily) "Yay!"
Mystrana: "Is everyone here?"
Cloud: "Yes."
Tifa: "Of course."
Aeris: "Why wouldn't I be?"
Barret: "Here."
Red: "Present."
Vincent: (nods his presence)
Yuffie: "When this is over, will I have new materia?"
Cid: "We're up so early!" (Does some of his famous cursing)
Mystrana: "Ok everyone seems here - wait! Where's Sephiroth?"
Cloud: "Don't know."
Tifa: "Don't care."
Aeris: "He's not here? GOOD!"
Barret: "Why do we have to wait for him?"
Red: "I haven't seen Sephiroth."
Vincent: "No clue."
Yuffie: "I don't want him here! He won't give me the black materia."
Cid: "Who care's were the %#$% Sephiroth is?"
Mystrana: "Well, during all of your answers, I managed to locate him. He is taking his bath. Shh. Listen!"
Sephiroth: (Singing off key and playing with a little plastic duck and Masamune Blade) "Rubber Ducky, you're the one . . . . . . You make bath time lots of fun!"
Aeris: "Oh, I just have to get a picture of this!"
Tifa: "Isn't that CUTE?"
Cloud: (Angry that Tifa thinks this is 'cute') "What a jerk."
(Aeris takes a picture. The camera flash causes Sephiroth to look up. Everyone ducks out of sight. Suddenly there is a splash as Sephiroth gets out of his bath and gets dressed. Then, all of the sudden, . . )
Sephiroth: "NOOOOO! ARGH!"
Cloud: (running in, Cloud sees Sephiroth standing over the remains of his rubber duck, which has been sliced in half) (plays dumb) "What happened Sephiroth?"
Sephiroth: (trying to hide tears) "Nothing! Go away!"
Cloud: "Aww, is little Sephy crying over his little ducky friend?"
Sephiroth: "Fine. If you must know, when I got my Masamune blade I accidentally sliced this toy duck in half."
Tifa: (Who just came in) "Sephiroth? You take baths with a TOY DUCK?"
Sephiroth: (Mumble, mumble)
Aeris: (snapping picture after picture of the duck and Sephiroth crying over it.) "Yes! Once in a lifetime pictures!"
Sephiroth: "Poor little, sniff, Henry John Smith the 24th."
Cloud: "You name your rubber toys?"
Sephiroth: "Doesn't everybody?"
Aeris: (Holding up a tape recorder) "Yes! I even managed to get Sephiroth saying that!" (Listens to it again...and again...and again)
Tifa: "Aeris, you're being mean!"
Aeris: "What? How can you possibly be mean to him?"
Tifa: " No, you're being mean to me! Let me take some pictures!"
(Aeris gets out another camera.)
Sephiroth: "We'll have to bury him."
Yuffie: (Now the entire crew of FF7 is in the room. Tight fit.) "Where?"
Sephiroth: "Next to all of the other ducks, of course!"
Cid: (rolls his eyes) "Let's get this over with!"
Sephiroth: "Hold it! First we need to get into proper clothing. Black, of course!"
(Everyone grumbles, but in 10 minutes everyone is back in black)
Sephiroth: (eyes them critically) "It'll do. So lets go. Follow me. I have a small coffin in my room for poor little Henry John Smith the 24th."
Tifa: "If you say he's the 24th, does that mean you've murdered 24 plastic ducks?"
Sephiroth: (Mumble, mumble.)
Aeris: (Laughing) "I can't believe Mr. Tough Guy Sephiroth has a little duck!"
Tifa: "Yeah! Go to sleep with a teddy bear, Sephy?"
Sephiroth: ". . . . ..... Maybe."
(Out in a yard)
Sephiroth: "He was a fine ducky, never giving a thought about himself! All he wanted was to keep me happy. And today, we are gathered in the Holy Matrimony -"
Cloud: "Wrong speech!"
Sephiroth: "Err, I mean, today we are gathered to say good-bye to a loved one, the one and only, Henry John Smith the 24th."
(Sephiroth digs a hole and puts the little ducky in the coffin and into the ground. He's crying hard).
(Back inside)
Sephiroth: "Oh, my poor ducky!"
Barret: "Enough about you're stupid duck!"
Sephiroth:" I'll take that as a challenge. He pulls out his Masamune blade only to find . . . . . . . a rubber ducky!"
Sephiroth: "A new rubber ducky! I shall name it Henry John Smith the 25th."
Yuffie: "How'd that happen?"
Cid: "Mystrana, do you have anything to do with this?"
Mystrana: "Well, um, he looked so sad without his Ducky and . . . "
Barret: "What, you're feeling sorry for this pile of crap?"
Mystrana: "Not really, but the plot has to keep moving."
Sephiroth: "What! How rude. I hate you, Mystrana!"
(Sephiroth pulls out his sword, but in the process cuts off the rubber ducks head)
Sephiroth: "What have I done?"
Cloud: "here we go again!"
Yuffie: "Come on; let's go steal his materia while he goes bury that one."
(Everyone except Sephiroth leaves. Sephiroth is crying over the loss of his ducky)
Cloud:(happily) "Yay!"
Mystrana: "Is everyone here?"
Cloud: "Yes."
Tifa: "Of course."
Aeris: "Why wouldn't I be?"
Barret: "Here."
Red: "Present."
Vincent: (nods his presence)
Yuffie: "When this is over, will I have new materia?"
Cid: "We're up so early!" (Does some of his famous cursing)
Mystrana: "Ok everyone seems here - wait! Where's Sephiroth?"
Cloud: "Don't know."
Tifa: "Don't care."
Aeris: "He's not here? GOOD!"
Barret: "Why do we have to wait for him?"
Red: "I haven't seen Sephiroth."
Vincent: "No clue."
Yuffie: "I don't want him here! He won't give me the black materia."
Cid: "Who care's were the %#$% Sephiroth is?"
Mystrana: "Well, during all of your answers, I managed to locate him. He is taking his bath. Shh. Listen!"
Sephiroth: (Singing off key and playing with a little plastic duck and Masamune Blade) "Rubber Ducky, you're the one . . . . . . You make bath time lots of fun!"
Aeris: "Oh, I just have to get a picture of this!"
Tifa: "Isn't that CUTE?"
Cloud: (Angry that Tifa thinks this is 'cute') "What a jerk."
(Aeris takes a picture. The camera flash causes Sephiroth to look up. Everyone ducks out of sight. Suddenly there is a splash as Sephiroth gets out of his bath and gets dressed. Then, all of the sudden, . . )
Sephiroth: "NOOOOO! ARGH!"
Cloud: (running in, Cloud sees Sephiroth standing over the remains of his rubber duck, which has been sliced in half) (plays dumb) "What happened Sephiroth?"
Sephiroth: (trying to hide tears) "Nothing! Go away!"
Cloud: "Aww, is little Sephy crying over his little ducky friend?"
Sephiroth: "Fine. If you must know, when I got my Masamune blade I accidentally sliced this toy duck in half."
Tifa: (Who just came in) "Sephiroth? You take baths with a TOY DUCK?"
Sephiroth: (Mumble, mumble)
Aeris: (snapping picture after picture of the duck and Sephiroth crying over it.) "Yes! Once in a lifetime pictures!"
Sephiroth: "Poor little, sniff, Henry John Smith the 24th."
Cloud: "You name your rubber toys?"
Sephiroth: "Doesn't everybody?"
Aeris: (Holding up a tape recorder) "Yes! I even managed to get Sephiroth saying that!" (Listens to it again...and again...and again)
Tifa: "Aeris, you're being mean!"
Aeris: "What? How can you possibly be mean to him?"
Tifa: " No, you're being mean to me! Let me take some pictures!"
(Aeris gets out another camera.)
Sephiroth: "We'll have to bury him."
Yuffie: (Now the entire crew of FF7 is in the room. Tight fit.) "Where?"
Sephiroth: "Next to all of the other ducks, of course!"
Cid: (rolls his eyes) "Let's get this over with!"
Sephiroth: "Hold it! First we need to get into proper clothing. Black, of course!"
(Everyone grumbles, but in 10 minutes everyone is back in black)
Sephiroth: (eyes them critically) "It'll do. So lets go. Follow me. I have a small coffin in my room for poor little Henry John Smith the 24th."
Tifa: "If you say he's the 24th, does that mean you've murdered 24 plastic ducks?"
Sephiroth: (Mumble, mumble.)
Aeris: (Laughing) "I can't believe Mr. Tough Guy Sephiroth has a little duck!"
Tifa: "Yeah! Go to sleep with a teddy bear, Sephy?"
Sephiroth: ". . . . ..... Maybe."
(Out in a yard)
Sephiroth: "He was a fine ducky, never giving a thought about himself! All he wanted was to keep me happy. And today, we are gathered in the Holy Matrimony -"
Cloud: "Wrong speech!"
Sephiroth: "Err, I mean, today we are gathered to say good-bye to a loved one, the one and only, Henry John Smith the 24th."
(Sephiroth digs a hole and puts the little ducky in the coffin and into the ground. He's crying hard).
(Back inside)
Sephiroth: "Oh, my poor ducky!"
Barret: "Enough about you're stupid duck!"
Sephiroth:" I'll take that as a challenge. He pulls out his Masamune blade only to find . . . . . . . a rubber ducky!"
Sephiroth: "A new rubber ducky! I shall name it Henry John Smith the 25th."
Yuffie: "How'd that happen?"
Cid: "Mystrana, do you have anything to do with this?"
Mystrana: "Well, um, he looked so sad without his Ducky and . . . "
Barret: "What, you're feeling sorry for this pile of crap?"
Mystrana: "Not really, but the plot has to keep moving."
Sephiroth: "What! How rude. I hate you, Mystrana!"
(Sephiroth pulls out his sword, but in the process cuts off the rubber ducks head)
Sephiroth: "What have I done?"
Cloud: "here we go again!"
Yuffie: "Come on; let's go steal his materia while he goes bury that one."
(Everyone except Sephiroth leaves. Sephiroth is crying over the loss of his ducky)