It was morning when Gumlick's screeching yanked Wil out of her Rickman- induced slumber. She was waving a copy of 'Hello' about as if it was the national flag of lunacy, and jumping about on the bed so much that Megan was bounced off it and landed with a a yelp on the floor. Wil looked up blearily.

"Wheddafekkya?" she muttered, which is insane-Rickmaniac-early-morning for 'Excuse me but what is the time please?'

"ALAN RICKMAN'S GOT MARRIED!" Gumlick called out, no doubt waking up people in adjoining rooms with her cry. Rickmaniac shot up in bed."HE'S MAAAAAARRRIIIIIIIIEEEEEEDDDD!!!!!"

"WHAT?" Rickmaniac said, her bottom jaw hitting the floor comically, so it sounded more like 'Wherrrrg.'

"Who to? Give me, Give me!" Wil yelled, temporarily forgetting she was in nothing but her nightshirt and jumping out of bed, clawing at Gumlick's ankles. Gumlick looked down with a look that was worthy of Snape and all three Rickmaniacs dropped to their knees.

"Who do you think?"

"HIS DOG!" Megan chirruped from somewhere on the floor. Rickmaniac's eyes widened.

"He has a dog?" the three other Rickmaniacs asked incredulously, looking over at the semi-unconscious Megan, lying face down on the floor. She turned her head to look at them.

"You stupid, stupid, stupid." Gumlick paused, lost. "Stupid person," she finished triumphantly

"So? Who??" Wil asked.

"RIMA!" Gumlick chorused happily, bouncing on the bed. There was silence in the room apart from a water-like, dripping sound, and Megan left the room abruptly.

"I see no difference." a Wil like noise said from the corner of the room.

"GIIIIIVVVVEEEEE MEEEEEEEEEEE!" The Rickmaniacs yelled, jumping on top of Gumlick, who cowered under the bed, magazine in hand.

"NO!"

"YAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHH!" Wil screeched, running around the room so fast she misjudged the wall and flew into it, knocking herself out. The fight paused.

"Oh..bugger," Rickmaniac said lightly. She shrugged, and the fight continued. With Megan's help, she overturned the bed, but to no avail, as Gumlick crawled out just in time, fell over the unconscious Wil, and went headfirst into the cupboard. Thankfully it shut behind her, unthankfully, she was locked in.

"Gumlick," Rickmaniac said in a surprisingly Sheriff-of -Nottingham voice, hovering behind the door. "If you don't come out I'll have to hurt Mr Flibble."

There was a gasp. "No! Not . not Mr Flibble!"

"Yes, Gumlick." Rickmaniac said ominously.

"You wouldn't dare!" she hissed. Rickmaniac raised an eyebrow and looked over at Wil, who looked as if she was trying desperately to recover from an all-night stoning session. She was trying to pull herself upright with the upturned bed, but her eyes were crossed and bloodshot and parts of her anatomy kept flailing about. Nevertheless, she managed to throw the Snape- lookalike teddy at Rickmaniac. She missed dreadfully and it hit the door with a thumpy-squeaky noise.

"Flibble!" Gumlick squeaked.

"Give.me..the.magazine!" Rickmaniac ordered. There was a pause in which Wil slumped to the floor very loudly, and the bed fell on top of her.

"No! Never!"

"Gumlick," Rickmaniac growled. "I'll hurt him!"

"NO!"

"Say goodbye to Mr Flibble, Gumlick. Gooooodbyeeeee..."

"Flibble!"

"Goodbyeeeeee, goodbyeeeee, wipe a dear, baby dear, from your eyeeeee!" Rickmaniac sang, off key.

"ARGH! Anything but you singing!" Gumlick commented from inside the cupboard. Rickmaniac glared.

"I SHALL BE MERCILESS! Megan, bring on the screwdriver!" Rickmaniac yelled. Megan passed her a charming, pink handled one and grinned before sitting back down on the bed that Wil was pinned under. She grunted in pain, but the sound was drowned out by Rickmaniac.

"One more chance, Gumlick. Will you give me the magazine?"

"NEVER!"

"Fine. The bear gets it."

"Nooooooooo!"

"I'm killing him with a screwdriver, Gumlick. It's painful, especially where I'm putting it."

"Let him go!"

"First hole. Looks like it's a deep one. Whoops, I ripped him. Christ, stuffing everywhere. Messy git. Next rip. Rip. Rip, Ripriprip!" she said, her voice getting louder and louder. Gumlick's whine rose to a wail.

"FLIIIIIIBLEEE!" she yelled. The door opened, and when the wail ended, the room was eerily silent.

"Holy." Rickmaniac said.

"Now he is," Gumlick muttered piteously.

There, in the doorway, stood a pyjama-clad and absolutely seething Alan Rickman.