Luke Skywalker was sitting with his family for dinner, though the kids and the droids were in the children's rooms playing and chaperoning, respectively.
"Anyway, as I was tellin' you, the Ambassador just got up and left the room after I gave him an earful! That served him right to insult you when you weren't there!" Han Solo, his brother-in-law exclaimed.
"Han, what exactly did he say?" Leia Organa Solo, his twin sister asked calmly.
"Well, he kinda said you were a hot babe and said, in his exact words, 'I would like to see what she has under those robes.' Of course, then, he didn't know that I was your husband...."
Leia gave him a hug, and said "Oh Han! You didn't have to do it for me! He was harmless!"
"I didn't do it for you, I did it for me!" Han replied, grinning arrogantly. Leia responded with a slap on his arm.
The doorbell rang. Leia went up to answer. "Who's visiting at this hour?" Leia said aloud. When she was greeted with a large bunch of flowers, Leia just stared in horror. Surely the Ambassador wouldn't go that far!
A head poked out, it was a gawky teenager. "Oh, good evening Princess Leia. Is, umm, Master Skywalker here? These are for him. I'm a delivery boy from Orowood Flowers." he said.
Leia secretly sighed a breath of relief. Then she turned to the delivery boy and said, "I'll take these to him. Thankyou." "No, Thank YOU." the boy said and quickly left.
She closed the door and headed to the lounge room. "Luke, these flowers are for you!" she said sweetly.
"Oh no! Not another bunch!" Luke moaned. He had been receiving a large number of flowers, cards, and even bras from all different women from all parts of the galaxy since he had been voted Most Eligible Bachelor in Playpeople Magazine. The article in the magazine described him as a "gorgeous baby blue eyed Rebel hero, who has high contacts in the New Republic, also is sensitive, funny, and to top it all off, a Jedi Master. His children would sure to be famous one day, with already famous children as cousins. He's been heartbroken recently, by a certain undead Jedi Knight and needs someone to heal his heart." He didn't like being described that way, but the Most Eligible Bachellorette, Mara Jade, must have welcomed it. The article described her as a "lovely red head, who's not only rich, but also has high contacts, in the legal and illegal departments. She could defend herself, as she is a Jedi Knight. She has an infamous reputation as the Emperor's Hand which would spice up any relationship!" Mara was known to have one night stands with most of her co-pilots. And since the spotlight was trained on her, nearly all of the male population had been going after her now. But he couldn't blame them, with that red fiery hair, emerald green eyes and that body, whoa that body... Luke shook himself out of that reverie and focused on the crisis at hand. Looking through the flowers, lodged at the bottom, he found a holocube, or so he thought. He discovered it was a holophoto, and pressed the open button. Too late, he looked away as he saw it was a naked woman in a very obscene pose, with the address of where she lived on the bottom of the picture.
"Hey, she's pretty good looking, consider her....ow!" Han yelped as Leia punched him in the arm and said "Han!" "Well, she is good looking, apart from the red hair, she looks too much like another red head I know." Han protested. Luke didn't have to guess who the other red head was. Mara....
"So what are going to do about this situation?" he asked the other two.
"I dunno, I mean, what can't be fixed by the all powerful Jedi Master?" Han said with a smirk. "Seriously though, in my experience," he earned a humorous look from Leia, "the best thing you can do is just make it out like you're inelegible, or taken. You can get a life long partner like me, or get a fake stand-in." he finished.
"Well, who in the galaxy can I get to stand in? It will have to be someone who's headstrong and have a reputation, because the women will not give up unless they are afraid of her." Luke said. Just as he finished speaking though, he received a message. Mara's face appeared on the holoscreen.
"Hiya Skywalker, being swamped by hoards of women? I'm going to turn to the Darkside soon with all the crap the men have been giving me. Damn magazine. Just called to ask if you wanted to meet and see if we could do anything about this situation." Mara said.
Luke noticed she was more beautiful than ever, but pushed those thoughts away. "Sure, where and when?" Luke answered.
Mara replied with, "In two days at Coruscant Buffet at 5 o'clock."
"How about I pick you up? Where will you be staying?" Luke asked.
"Mara, how about living in the Imperial Palace for a few days?" Leia butted in.
"OK. Thanks Leia, see you guys soon!" Mara logged off, without waiting for any answer.
"I'll go put the kids to sleep." Luke said and headed towards the kids' room. Leia and Han exchanged a look. "Are you thinking about what I'm thinking?" Leia asked.
"No, don't even think about it! Speaking in Luke's favour, she's tried to kill him, and also had a temper that will not go good against his annoying "Jedi patience". Speaking in Mara's favour, why would anyone want to live an isolated life in a quiet temple! I mean, a person living like that wouldn't be that good in bed...Ouch!" Han yelled. Leia used a Force punch onto his arm.
"Hey, don't use that hocus pocus stuff on me! One day I'm going to file for husband-abuse!" Han said, agitated.
"Well, you deserve it. I wasn't thinking of Mara as a lifelong partner, just a stand-in, I mean, it will do good for both of them. People would not brazenly declare their love for them, nobody wants to get on the bad side of a Jedi Master or the infamous Master Trader ex-Emperor's Hand!"
"Well, you may think it's a good idea, but how will you convince the other two?" Han asked. Leia just sat there, her mind already formulating an idea.
Meanwhile, while all this was happening, Luke was in the kid's room, thinking. Though he wouldn't have got much concentration, what, with all the kids screaming, laughing, and what any ordinary children would be doing before bedtime. Except for one thing. These were Force-strong children. How was he to think of a solution when he was bombarded with Force thrown pillows? He couldn't go into a Jedi trance because they would only go into his mind. That always reminded him of how strong in the Force they were. At this moment, he was foolishly thinking of the problem when the children tapped into his mind yet again.
Jacen, one of the twins asked him, "Uncle Luke? Why is Mara Jade taking up all your space in your mind? Is she going to be our Aunty soon?"
"No I wasn't thinking of her...." Luke answered somewhat sheepishly, his face reddening.
"Yes you were! I could sense it too!" Jaina, Jacen's sister said loudly.
"Yup, you really like her, especially her body!" Jacen said wickedly.
"Hey, Uncle Luke was also worrying about two words too....ummm I think it was love and Mara..." Anakin, the youngest brother said matter-of-factly, causing Luke to redden even more.
"Uncle Luke loves Aunty Mara! Uncle Luke loves Aunty Mara!" the children started chanting.
See-Threepio chose this moment to butt in, "Now children, Master Skywalker couldn't possibly love Miss Jade, after all, she DID want to kill him once, and what could a Jedi want with a Trader?"
"Haven't you heard of true love? Or the story of Banthernella and the Prince Banther who loved each other? It was in the Little Lost Bantha Club Stories that you read to us." Jaina said, pretending to swoon.
"Now, now, it's time for bed, so all of you get in those bed covers and I'll see you tomorrow." Luke said, trying fiercely to evade the question and avoiding them. He was blushing furiously.
The children did as they were told, though they were still giggling as Luke walked out of the room. Artoo and See-Threepio shut down.
Mara shut down the comm message and turned to Chin, her female co-pilot. "Change of plans, we're staying at the Imperial Palace." she said.
Chin's eyes turned wide. "The palace? Who let you stay there?" she asked in awe.
"Well, Leia did." Mara answered.
"Leia as in Leia Organa Chief Of State Solo??" she exclaimed.
"Yeah." Mara said as she shrugged. Man, she didn't get out much did she?
"Wow Mara, I didn't know you knew them. I thought they were just rumours..." Chin said, looking at Mara in a new light.
"Well now you know. I'm going to lightsaber practice. Call me when we reach Coruscant." Mara said and abruptly left the room.
"Wonder if we'll meet Luke Skywalker, he is so way cute..." Chin mused, as she stared into hyperspace.
Meanwhile, in the cargo hold, Mara was busy practicing with her lightsaber on the remotes. Her mind was having a busy duel of its own. I wonder what Luke is doing now, I can't wait to duel with him again. Hey, you know you want to just see him again. I do not want to see that farmboy again. Yes you do, you know you like him than more than just a friend. I don't want him even as a friend. Then why are you staying at the palace? I'm just being nice to Leia. Who are you kidding? You're just brown nosing your future in laws. Why did you go to Luke straight away for the problem? How come not Karrde, Aves, or even Lando? Well they didn't get chosen for Most Eligible Bachelor, did they? Luke's also the most understanding, isn't he? Well, yeah, but that doesn't mean that I'm in love with people like Streen! I didn't say anything about love, did I? You said it! Oh, shut up!
Mara just went back to her cabin and drifted off to sleep.
Luke Skywalker ran through his Jedi-calming techniques as he got ready. It was 3 o'clock right now, if his chrono was right. Breathe in Luke, Mara.... Breathe out, green eyes. Breathe in, red hair. Breathe in, that smile. Breathe out, clear the head Luke. He could practically hear Yoda scolding him for his passion. Passion, now where did that come from?
Mara Jade was nervous. Nervousness, a word rarely used in the same sentence with the Trader, was making her pace in her room. Chin sat looking at her. "Mara, why don't you just sit down? Who is it that we're expecting?" Chin asked, Mara had been silent about this subject all the way from the ship to getting settled in the room. Chin herself was amazed at the size of the palace.
When Mara didn't answer, Chin said, "Well?"
Mara sighed. Chin had a mega crush on Luke Skywalker and what he didn't need right now was another adoring fan. "OK, I'll tell you. Skywalker is coming here to pick me up for me, only me, to go to a restaurant to discuss our problem."
"Ohmigod! Skywalker, as in Luke who'sfatherwasDarthVaderJediMasterHerooftheNewRepublic Skywalker is coming here? To this room?" Chin squealed.
"Yes, but don't tell anyone about it. Luke is having the same problem as I am, and we're going to think of a solution, strictly business." Mara said crisply.
"Good, that means that I'll have a chance at making him like me." Chin muttered.
"What was that Chin?" Mara asked.
"Nothing." she answered. Secretly thinking what dress she should wear to impress him.
"Chin, you *do* know that I'll be going alone with him to the restaurant, don't you?" Mara asked.
"Well, yes. But that doesn't mean I won't see him when he comes here." Chin said defensively.
"Anyway, I'd better start changing and getting ready." Mara said, and with that, went into her room.
Half an hour later, she came out, looking gorgeous. She wore a backless, lowcut green dress that shimmered in the light. It showed off all her curves. Of course, she wore her blaster and lightsaber at her hip. She wore her hair in a roll with wisps of hair on either side of her face.
"You look great Mara!" Chin complemented, hiding her jealousy. She herself wore a red dress and matching red clips in her hair.
"Where are you going tonight?" Mara asked, noting the dress.
"Oh, just the clubs in the city. What about you?" she asked innocently.
"Skywalker and I are going to Coruscant Buffet." Mara answered.
"Oh really?" Chin said, carefully storing it away for later use.
Their conversation was interrupted when the doorbell rang.
"That must be Skywalker now! Do I look alright?" Mara was fretting. She got up and opened the door. She was greeted with a very handsome Luke who wasn't dressed in his usual Jedi robes, instead he was wearing a black pants with a light blue silk shirt which showed off his muscles. It didn't mean he lost all the Jedi Master power emanating from him though. No wonder why he was voted Most eligible bachelor...
Luke was just as stunned as Mara when she opened the door. She was gorgeous, not that she usually wasn't, but he only rarely saw her in a dress, as his eyes traveled down her body. No wonder she was voted Most eligible bachellorette...
Mara was the first to recover. "Would you like to come in?" she asked and made room for him in the doorway.
"Uh, S-Sure." he stammered, still staring at her.
This was one of those rare times she'd seen him stutter and *really* act like a farmboy, contrary to what she always teases him about. She began laughing.
"What?" Luke asked, irritated but amused. He was still standing outside her doorway.
"Well, aren't you going to come in? Because if you aren't, I'll have to close the door." With this, she made a show of slowly closing the door with the Force.
Luke's face went beet red and used the Force to open the door. Sith, how many times has my face turned red because of Mara? He stepped inside.
*Why Skywalker! Nice to be appreciated!* he heard a voice in his head and some laughter.
Another woman entered the room from the bedroom. Luke glanced at the pretty woman and raised his eyebrow at Mara.
"Oh! Forgot to introduce you. Luke, meet Chin, my co-pilot." Mara said, her eyes losing herself to his backside as he walked over to greet Chin.
*Now who's the one that's being the farmgirl?* he Force spoke to Mara, as he greeted Chin. Mara turned red. Damn, he must have heard what I said before!
He ended up with a Force thrown pillow being flown towards his head, though he managed to stop it in mid-air.
Chin just stared at the pillow, then at the couple. She looked at them questionably.
"Sorry, we're communicating using the Force." Luke apologized.
"Oh, no need to say sorry." Chin said sweetly, flirtatiously smiling, though inside she was angry. That's another strike in favour of Mara. I don't have any Force powers.
"Anyway, we should go now." he said, turning to Mara.
"Yeah, I'm ready." Mara replied, and said to Chin, "Have a fun time at the club!"
"Very nice to have met you." Luke said, before turning away to take Mara by the hand and led them to the door.
"Likewise!" Chin called over their shoulders. Have to get to Luke somehow, maybe if I accidentally on purpose bump into them? She started thinking up a plan...
Luke and Mara reached the palace entrance and waited for a landspeeder. After a few minutes, they got one and climbed in.
"Ladies first." Luke said as he helped Mara into the vehicle.
Mara thanked him with a charming smile and teasingly commented "Must be picking up habits from Lando."
Luke chuckled at this thought and the landspeeder sped away towards the restaurant.
Meanwhile, Chin rushed towards Coruscant Buffet, she had caught a faster landspeeder and had paid extra to go faster. She was hoping to catch Luke before he went into the restaurant, maybe he'll invite her to his dinner with Mara... When she reached the entrance though, to her dismay, a giant crowd of men and women were there, blocking the entrance and waiting for someone. Chin turned to the nearest people waiting. "Who are you waiting for?" she asked.
The woman replied "Luke Skywalker."
While the man said "Mara Jade."
Chin didn't have any time to react to this news because Luke and Mara arrived.
The crowd surged forward. "Luke! We love you!" "Mara! Please accept my love!" "I'll fight the Emperor for you!" "I'll polish your lightsaber every morning!"
Skywalker and Jade both stood there in shock. *What in the Force can we do?* Mara asked desperately.
*No idea*
*C'mon, you're the great Jedi Master!*
*Even Jedi Masters aren't THAT powerful! Especially when under stress!*
*How did they know we were going to be here anyway??*
*No idea have I.*
*Skywalker! Get outta that Yoda phase!*
*Sorry, I get like that under pressure.*
*So what did you say to Vader? The Light side come back to? What, join the illiterate side?*
*Mara, I think we have more important matters to tend with first.* Luke Force-spoke, gesturing to the increasing crowd.
"Oh, actually Skywalker, I've already thought of a solution for that.." Mara said mischievously, before pulling him in for a kiss.
Luke, taken by surprise was stiff for a moment, then melted into her arms.
The crowd quieted as they witnessed this exchange between their objects of desires.
"I never knew Skywalker and Jade were in love with each other!" "They couldn't be, could they?" Low whispers began spreading through the crowd, but Luke and Mara were oblivious to it.
If I'd known kissing Skywalker was this good, I would've done it sooner...
*I'm very flattered Mara.*
*You weren't supposed to hear that!*
Eventually, the crowd headed home. Even Chin.
Oh well, I guess I can change my preferences. Wonder if Mara could introduce me to Aves... Chin thought and started toward the nearest nightclub.
Meanwhile, Luke and Mara pulled apart, panting from their lack of air.
They stared at each other.
I want to kiss her again, but that was all a charade, wasn't it? Luke thought.
*I heard that* Mara Force-spoke.
*So what do you think of that thought?*
Mara responded him with another pash.
"Say, who "did" tell all those people that we were going to this restaurant?" Luke asked.
"Who cares? We'll need to thank that person. For now, shut up and kiss me." Mara replied and pulled him in for yet another mind-blowing kiss.
Two dark figures stood, watching the smooching couple. One was happy, while the other hung their head down in defeat.
One of the figures said, "Ha Han! Told you I could get the two of them together! You know what losing the bet means!
The other figure replied mournfully, "Yes Leia, I know. I have to wash the dishes for a month without the help of the kitchen droid."
"It was a good thing I alerted the newsnet about Luke and Mara's date, wasn't it?" Leia said it triumphantly, without expecting an answer. She let out a squeal as Han grabbed her from behind and started doing to Leia what the two Jedi below were doing. THE END? (hmm..mwhahahaha!)