AN - Okay, I'm really sorry to the two of you who said that the story was going so slowly. The old this-is-my-first-fic excuse need not be applied. Everybody's sick of that alibi anyway. I'll try my best to speed things up, but I'm not promising anything. I'm going to update slower again 'cause I have school and all (sob)… And--about the confusing language--I'll fix it. What can I say, I'm vague and incoherent ^_^ ; Thanks for pointing out the mistakes. Oh yeah, and thanks to those who reviewed!
Disclaimer: Harry Potter, Hogwarts, etc.---JK Rowling, plot and original characters---Dimantrien. Whoa that was short.
Chapter 14: Friday the 13th
Chase broke away after a few seconds. "What was that for?" she asked, her cheeks slightly tinged with pink.
Sirius felt his cheeks grow warm. "I don't know," he muttered. It was a good thing that everyone around them was acting all lovey-dovey, because no one else (he thought) was paying the least bit of attention to them. The fact was, he knew what he did that for. He kissed her because…well, he just damn felt like it. It wasn't that he was taking advantage of Chase, but somehow he knew that this was--right.
"Whatever you say," Chase said from somewhere far away. He snapped out of his thoughts. Or maybe he was just affected by all the mushy antics of the couples all around them. Yeah…that must be it. Even Lily and James, who were the most anti-mush people in the world, could get all doe-eyed with each other. That must have been the reason…
"Are you okay? You don't look so good all of a sudden," Chase said in a concerned voice. Sirius didn't move, so she steered him away from the waltzing students, sitting down at one of the tables. (Dumbledore must have set them up again for those who needed a rest.)
"Hey, Sirius?" Chase spoke up as he sat down.
"What?" Sirius answered. She wasn't going to ask why he kissed her, was she? At least she didn't run away, like most girls did when he kissed them. He could count on Chase sitting it out. Still…what if she was going to tell him that she wasn't interested? What if she was totally repulsed by him? What if--
"When you--you know-- Were you thinking of Celeste?"
"Huh?" Sirius said. He wasn't even listening. "Er--I don't know."
"Oh. Well then, who do you really like?" What? She was seriously asking who he wanted to be with? What was he going to say?
Sirius felt the hairs at the back of his neck prickle, but it wasn't because of the cold. His mouth felt strangely dry. "I don't know," he replied lamely.
"Any other words in your vocabulary?" Chase said, rolling her eyes.
"Why do you ask, anyway?" Sirius contested.
"Because you just kissed me in front of eight hundred people! What would you call that, mouth to mouth resuscitation?" Chase demanded.
Oops. Good point. She did have the right to ask. "Er--I--um--" he stammered.
"Take your time," Chase said, holding up a hand. She tapped her golden goblet and said, "Ginger ale, if you don't mind." The cup filled itself.
"Okay, see--I just--" Why couldn't he form a coherent sentence? Why did she suddenly affect him like this?
Chase started to chuckle as she sipped her drink.
"What's so funny?" demanded Sirius. He was busy thinking here, and all she could do was laugh? A minute ago she was the one who looked ready to burst into tears any second.
"It's just that--I've never seen you like this. You know what everybody says about you, right? Sirius Black: cool, calm, collected, clever, cunning, counterbalanced, comely, comical…and a bunch of other 'C' adjectives that you've lived up to. It's pretty funny to see the old stereotype crumble at last."
"Is that what everybody's been saying about me?" Sirius said in a puzzled voice, grateful to finally have formed a sensible question.
"Only for three and a half years," Chase chuckled, her eyes twinkling. "So, have you figured out if you like Celeste or not?"
"Oh!" Sirius had forgotten about it for a split second. "I guess--I don't," he answered finally. "I mean, I liked her and everything, but now that she and Rem--well, I guess I can't stop him from being happy, since he finally has a reason to be at last. Besides, he's one of my best friends."
"Good answer. If nothing else, I would've thought you were a typical male who only cares about bragging about how many girls he lip-locked with in the past to his buddies." Chase drained her goblet and back down.
"Was that your first impression of me when Lily introduced us?" he asked with raised eyebrows.
"No," Chase admitted. "But I knew from her that you've had quite a number of relationships in the past," she added with a smirk.
"And what does that mean?" Sirius asked defensively.
"Nothing! Why do you always answer my explanations with a question?"
"I'm trying to see if you can answer all of them," Sirius deadpanned.
"Thanks a lot. At least I don't stutter and take three minutes before replying," she shot back.
"All right. I guess nobody can beat you in the shooting-people-down department."
"Damn straight."
"You know, it's kinda weird. Sometimes you look so much like a girl but your attitude's just…not," Sirius commented.
"Sometimes? When don't I look like a girl?" Chase grabbed a churro stick from a platter and dipped it in melted chocolate.
Sirius was silent for a minute. "Okay, let me rephrase. Sometimes you don't act like a girl, but on other occasions, like now, you surprise us with complete one-eighties and appear looking like the popular princess or something."
"Popular princess?" Chase said with a smirk, as if she was mentally running through the image. "That's so not going to happen."
"That's what I mean!" Sirius said energetically. "You--"
"Hey Sirius!" they heard Remus yell.
Sirius saw him and Celeste running toward them. Celeste had a triumphant, smug smile on her face.
"Sirius, you won't believe what we just witnessed!" Remus said, out of breath.
"Gee, thanks so much for acknowledging me," Chase said sarcastically.
"Oh, hi to you too, Chase," Remus said with a grin. "C'mon, you two, to the balcony! You've gotta see this! Were you just sitting here talking all this time?"
Remus and Celeste, hand in hand, ran ahead. Sirius looked at Chase.
"Well, consider yourself lucky, Black," Chase told him dryly. "Bet you thought he saw us--"
"You win, you win, that's just what I was thinking," Sirius said impatiently, pulling her up from her seat. He grinned. "But whatever they saw, I bet it had something to do with--"
"Lily and James," Chase finished, smirking. "Let's go!"
*****
Remus and Celeste ran to the balcony overlooking the outer terrace. They had to loop through several secret passages, and he was sure Sirius would be up in a flash, too. Sooner than he could think, Chase and Sirius appeared. Sirius looked like he'd run a mile; Chase's hair was slightly jostled. She untied a beaded scrunchie and redid her hair.
"Come over here, the pair of you!" Celeste gestured at them to hurry up, her eyes sparkling just like Chase's.
Chase strolled over first, dragging Sirius along. "For a Beater, you sure have little stamina," she told him.
"Hey, how was I to know that Kettleburn kept his giant bats in that passage?" Sirius said defensively. His words were soon cut short as they peered over the edge.
"Whoa," Sirius said, clapping his hand over his mouth.
Chase smirked.
"Told ya," Remus said.
"It worked, Chase! Maybe all those months of acting were actually worth it!" Celeste said ecstatically.
James and Lily were on the terrace below, caught in an old-fashioned lip lock. Yep, things couldn't get any more amusing than this…
"Think we should break them up?" Chase suggested with a wicked grin.
"I bet they haven't broken that kiss since we first saw them from up here, Celes," Remus told her.
"What were you two doing up here?" Sirius asked curiously. Remus and Celeste blushed bright red. Chase's grin widened.
"You two are too fast for us," she said, shaking her head. "It isn't even Valentines' Day yet…"
"Shhh! They might hear you!" Celeste shushed.
"Why do you think that spying on innocent people making out is such an enjoyable experience?" whispered Chase.
"Because it's Lily and James," Sirius said. "I say we snap them out of it," he said, his expression a replica of Chase's smile.
"I second the motion," Chase agreed.
Celeste looked skeptical. "I don't think that's such a good--"
"They've been at it for almost one minute!" Remus announced. "Hey, Sirius, don't--"
"Yo, studmuffin, break it up!" Sirius shouted at the top of his lungs, leaning over the balcony. Chase doubled over, laughing.
Lily and James looked up, expressions of shock, disbelief, embarrassment, and finally anger flashing through their faces in an instant. They pulled away from each other almost imperceptibly.
Chase whistled using her thumb and forefinger. "Talk about hot and heavy!" she snickered through her laughter.
"I didn't tell them to do it, I swear!" Remus exclaimed in a panicked tone.
"What do you think you're doing, spying on us?!" James said furiously, his cheeks flushed with embarrassment (or maybe it was because of their kiss ^_~ lol).
"Maybe you were smooching so loudly, that's why Rem and Celes heard you!" Sirius shouted back, tears of mirth in his eyes.
"Shut up, Sirius, they might be really angry," Celeste scolded him, but she couldn't help but let out a giggle herself.
Lily stood up. "C'mon, Jamie, we'd better find someplace else more private."
"Looks like you didn't try hard enough the first time," Sirius sniggered. James glared at him.
"Now, Sirius, you shouldn't laugh like that. What would you feel if James walked in on you when you were kissing someone?" Remus tried to reason.
"I wouldn't care. I mean, we're all almost fifteen. Why, haven't you kissed anybody before Celes?" Sirius demanded, glancing from Remus to Celeste.
Remus turned pink. "Well, no," he mumbled.
Sirius, not expecting this kind of answer, discontinued his interrogation.
"We'd better get back to the dance," Chase said, finally controlling her laughs. "Or maybe we should just go back to the dormitories. It seems like we've already had more than enough entertainment for one night."
"Morning," Celeste corrected.
"Whatever," Chase retorted. "Besides, I have no doubt that Lily wouldn't want us to stay up late, sis. We'd better get some sleep, or at least act like we're asleep."
"But I want to ask her what she felt when they were doing it--" Celeste started to protest.
"If you want to know what it feels like, why don't you just swap spit with Remus?" Chase said exasperatedly. Celeste's cheeks flamed up and she didn't say another word.
"Swap spit? What kind of term is that?" Sirius cracked up.
"It's a more disgusting way of implying 'kissing'," Chase deadpanned.
"Okay, okay, I think I get it now," Sirius said as they passed through one of the shortcuts to Gryffindor Tower. His eyes lit up. "Hey, why don't we stop over the kitchens? I'm getting a little hungry after all that laughing."
"Yeah, that's why James called you a pig," Celeste piped up.
"I am not a pig, I'm always hungry after I get a good laugh."
"Then it's remarkable how you never grow fat, judging from the number of disaster pranks you accumulated this year," Remus commented.
"Hey, don't blame me for having a metabolism that moves faster than--"
"Your mouth," Chase ended.
"Are you saying that I'm talkative?" Sirius asked irritably.
"Well, you can hurl insults at the Slytherins at light speed," she answered with a smirk.
Remus tapped a fairy statue just inside the exit of the passage. The wall cracked open and they stepped outside. Miraculously, they had reached the painting of the bowl of fruit that led into the kitchens.
Sirius tickled the pear, opened the handle and stepped inside. The others decided to wait for him outside.
A minute later he came out, his arms overflowing with a whole roasted turkey, thick gravy and several side dishes in small bowls. "There're more inside," he told them. Remus came in and carried a variety of pastries in a box in his arms.
With more help from Remus and Sirius, they reached the Fat Lady's portrait within three minutes. They ate the food in the empty common room and retreated to their dormitories as 3:00 a.m. rolled around.
"Chase, d'you think Lil would be mad at us?" Celeste said worriedly as they climbed the staircase.
"Chill, sis. As long as we pretend we never saw it, she'll be okay," Chase assured.
"Are you sure?" Celeste said doubtfully.
"I'm always sure. Hurry up and unlock the door; I need to take off this horrible makeup that you put on me…"
Celeste rolled her eyes. "Alohomora," she recited, tapping the doorknob. "You only put it on for, like, five hours," she teased as she switched on the lights and headed straight for the bathroom.
"Have a nice time battling bacteria," Chase said dully, reaching for the cleansing cream on Celeste's dresser.
An hour later, after Chase's countless rattles on the bathroom door for Celeste to hurry up and Celeste's complaints that they needed five showers instead of only one, they finally pulled on their nightgowns and shut the hangings on their beds. Chase had just lain down on her pillow when the door opened, sending a flood of light into the room.
"Thanks for walking me up here, James," they heard Lily's voice say. Chase pulled the hangings on her right side slightly, which faced away from the door. Celeste did the same with her left curtains. They exchanged amused looks as they heard a last smooching noise. Chase stuck her tongue out and rolled her eyes just as Lily was closing the door; Celeste let out a quiet giggle but caught herself just in time before Lily could hear. They dropped back to bed as Lily crossed the room.
"Chase? Celes? Are you awake?" Lily called.
Chase didn't respond, and to her relief, so had Celeste. She could hear Lily giving a huge, relieved sigh as she entered the bathroom.
Chase opened her curtains again almost at the same time Celeste had.
Celeste's eyes sparkled. "Can't I just--"
"No, you can't," Chase whispered back. "Leave her alone, Celes. Don't forget, we're the ones who pushed her into going for it."
Celeste looked disappointed. "I guess you're right…" she trailed off reluctantly. "Good night, Chase."
"Hope the bed bugs bite, darling sister." Chase fell back onto her bed.
"Ha, ha." Celeste said before rolling over and turning her back on Chase.
*****
Christmas passed by in a blur, and before they knew it, it was the day before Valentines'. (How's that for fast?) Problem was, February 13 was a Friday…
"Yes! My favorite day of the year," Sirius cheered the night before, on February 12. The six of them were in the common room.
"I thought your birthday was your favorite day of the year," Remus pointed out.
"Why would he like his birthday more than April Fools' Day?" Celeste asked, confused.
"His birthday is on April 1, Celes," Chase said exasperatedly. "That must have been the most logical reason why his brain works the way it does."
"Right as always," Sirius said with a grin. "C'mon, you guys, I've already gotten a roll of parchment full of people who are overly-superstitious--"
"D'you have Snape on that list?" Chase asked.
James glanced at the three-foot long parchment. "Nope. But it would be nice if he was one," he answered, looking disappointed that Snape wasn't on the roster.
"Well, he is," Chase said, swiping a Chocolate Frog from the pile of sweets that Sirius had stolen from the Honeydukes cellar. "You shouldn't be filching candies from the shop, you know," she addressed Sirius as she unwrapped it.
Sirius rolled his eyes. "Yeah, that's why you're eating unpaid confections. You know I only bring them in for you," he responded.
"How sweet," Chase said sarcastically. "Anyway," she said, turning back to James, "You never knew that? When I told him in Arithmancy that Altrow had announced a quiz and he didn't study, I heard him knocking on the wood. He was trying to look all inconspicuous, but it was so obvious what he was doing. Then there was the time when Hagrid was teetering on this ladder to trim the top part of a Christmas tree, and Snape didn't even notice him. He was right underneath the ladder when I told him that he was probably going to get bad luck (I hope) and then he positively shook and fled away, though that might've been because Hagrid could have fallen and squished him to a pulp any second. Pity it didn't happen, though…"
Celeste's eyes glowed with amusement. "Remember the time two years ago, when Aunt Guida gave you a pure black cat for a pet? We were walking it across the grounds when Snape purposefully bumped me, and when I snapped at him, he just stared at Midnight and let out a high-pitched gasp--"
Sirius cracked up. "High-pitched gasp? That sunken-faced lummox?"
"Why didn't you ever tell us before?" Lily said as she laughed.
"Well, you never asked. I think it's a bit stupid of him, even Muggles know that witches like black cats and such." Celeste picked on her chipped fingernail polish and gave it a tap of the wand, which immediately filled the white spots up.
"He's always been stupid," Sirius said. "The only thing he's good at is Potions and I bet we would've gotten higher marks than him if Ridgewood didn't favor him too much. I think he purposefully takes points from us so that Snape can be the 'best' at something."
"Enough talk about Slytherin slime, then," Remus interjected. "We were supposed to plan stuff for tomorrow, weren't we?"
"Yeah, we better turn in," Lily told the twins. "See you guys tomorrow. Make Divination more interesting."
Identical evil grins spread on the marauders' faces. "Oh, we will. See, we're going to have a practical quiz tomorrow, maybe it's time we started predicting her day for once…"
*****
The next day, Sirius got thirty-seven detentions for multiple reasons (though all were related to scaring the wits out of superstitious students (and teachers ^_-)). He was sent to the Headmaster's office exactly eight times in three hours, was three times yelled at in the halls by Professor McGonagall, and was continuously given death glares and murderous looks by victims passing him in the corridors. Approximately 400 people smirked as teachers randomly exploded at him, precisely 200 Slytherins (201 if you included Ridgewood) scowled at and attempted to give him a good beating (or jinxing) between classes, four friends and one girlfriend (Chase?) cheered him on, and two of those got loads of punishments and go-to-Dumbledore's-office messages too.
As they were settling into the start of the second to last period (Charms), there was a loud rap on the door just as Flitwick was getting to the finer points of the effects of the Sapience Charm.
Flitwick exhaled loudly and waved his wand at the door. A Ravenclaw prefect was just opening her mouth when--
"Yes, yes, I believe everyone already knows the story. Which one of them will be going to the Headmaster's office now?" he asked in exasperation.
"Er, all three of them, professor," the sixth year replied, looking a bit apprehensive of her Head of House's unusual short fuse.
"Carry on then, boys!" Flitwick said in a somewhat peevish voice. The marauders shrugged and strolled out into the hall, where the prefect handed James the note and hurried away back to whatever class she was taking at the moment.
They reached the gargoyle and said the password (for the eighteenth time that day), "Ice Mice," and the gargoyle jumped aside to reveal the spiraling staircase leading to Dumbledore's office.
"Wonder who complained about us now," Sirius said as they climbed the first turn of steps.
"Probably Aiken Kenrick," James responded as he mentally ran through the people they had set 'bad luck' omens on. "Hufflepuff. You know them, thick when they're friendly, real whiners when they're mad. I bet he'd tattle on his mum and we'll get an earful of moral upbringing and self-disciplinary restraint again…"
"And loads of deducted points," Remus piped up gloomily.
Sirius sighed. "And detentions--I've got fifty-two lined up for the next two weeks."
"A thousand sermons from McGonagall…"
"More homework…"
"Howlers…"
They reached Dumbledore's door and opened it, not bothering to knock. The headmaster wasn't there, but Fawkes the phoenix was perched on his cage, nodding to them. The usual old headmasters and headmistresses in the walls were all visiting their friends.
There were four books on Dumbledore's desk; one extremely thin, the other three extremely thick and roughly estimated as over a thousand pages each. Sirius was just making a grab for one when the door opened and Dumbledore came in.
"Ah, yes, you three. I had just gone to the Owlery; there were several parents complaining their cases through speed mail--frigate sea birds swooping into my office for hours on end. I do believe it was your mother, Sirius, who sent an African Grey parrot? It was going on and on about what she would have said to you if she were here… It was quite a good speaker. I assume that Maeve thought that a Howler would be too extravagant--though I suppose she shall send you one tomorrow?"
"That was mum alright," Sirius agreed grimly, plopping down on an overstuffed armchair facing Dumbledore's desk.
James and Remus sat down on armchairs on each side of him; this arrangement had probably become permanent in Dumbledore's office since his visitors were usually the marauders anyway.
"What're those books for, Professor?" James asked, pointing at the four on the desk.
"Oh, these? As you might guess, these three thick ones here hold your behavioral reports." He picked up the thickest compilation and tapped it. "This one here is Sirius's. It records all the pranks you pulled on students and teachers alike, and the respective detentions you have received as consequences."
"Gee, that much?" Sirius remarked. He peered closely at the book. "I always thought I accomplished more than that."
"Surely?" Dumbledore said. "That was not quite the reaction I hoped to hear from you, but I guess being proud of your credentials does give you some right."
"Whose is that one over there, then?" Remus asked.
Dumbledore flipped open the thinnest book--if you could call it that. "This? This is Peter Pettigrew's. I daresay you have been rather unattached to him this year; he hasn't been committing to any of your jokes lately. It has given a miraculous increase in his grade point average, I'll give you that…"
"To business matters, however," Dumbledore continued in a serious tone. "The teachers have been coming up to complain to me too, I'm afraid. Professor Trelawney, in particular," he added with a twinkle in his eye, "threatened to resign if your pranks did not cease. It was unavoidable to ask you--all three of you--to come here again, so here we are."
"She said she was going to resign?" Sirius asked, leaning forward eagerly. Though he was very good in Divination, he was sick of Trelawney always asking him what maladies and adversities he could see through crystal balls.
"By no means," Dumbledore answered. "And I am sure you will understand if you cannot pursue your monkeyshines any further, lest you desire to be suspended or expelled. Though comments were quite common this day that they would try to eject me from my position if I did not stop you… How very queer indeed…"
"They're going to impeach you?" Remus said in amazement.
"Not quite, but I do think they shall attempt it. It would be nice to have a little break though, do you not think so?" Dumbledore's eyes twinkled merrily, as if the prospect of being removed from his prestigious position would be quite fascinating.
"But, you can't let them do that, Professor," James objected. "I mean, they'd have to go against the Ministry and all the people who voted for you to be Headmaster--"
"Oh, but they can, James. I do not have the kind of power that can control others' decisions. No, if I did, I would not turn up as I am today. The flaw we humans have is in our craving for riches and power, two of the things that if removed from this world would create a very peaceful outcome among us." Dumbledore picked up a silver instrument on his desk that had stopped spinning and wound a little key underneath it. He set it back on the desk.
"Well, I'm sure they'll lose. Nobody would dare take over your position, sir," Sirius confided.
"Thank you, Sirius. But we are getting far from the real reason I have called you here at this time. I would very much like to say that you could carry on with your…amusing plans, but I fear that it is no longer permitted. I would just like to point out that you have set a new record for the number of detentions in one week, that is, thirty-nine."
"We did?" Sirius asked. "Which one of us?"
"You, of course," James said wearily. "We never could keep up with you."
"Correct. The point is, you are not to play any more tricks on unaware students for the rest of the day, otherwise your parents will disapprove of seeing you on their doorstep so early before the end of the school year. Now, I do hope you three will behave yourselves?"
The three nodded, not daring to cross their fingers behind their backs. It was a mystery how Dumbledore could read all their movements even if he couldn't see them.
"That is all. You may go back to your classes. Oh yes, and I have assigned a student to watch over you for the remaining hours of this day. You will find that particular person sticking close to you all the way to your common room. Until then, I trust that you three shall follow the rules?"
"Yes, sir," the three of them chorused automatically. They made their way down the stairs and back to Charms.
"Can you believe it? I haven't even finished half of my list yet," Sirius complained, taking out his six-foot long roll of parchment and letting it spread out before him.
"Only you would find that a cause for alarm, Sirius," James laughed as they descended a set of stairs.
"Whatever. Never mind then, I'll just finish all these on my birthday, but that's still ages away. Let's see them try to stop me then…" Sirius trailed off. They reached their classroom and slipped through the door, noticing that some of their classmates had a dazed look on their faces. Flitwick was just saying, "The spell will take effect any moment now…"
Remus jumped as Peter, who was on the chair nearest the door, started to speak. "The relative atomic mass of cobalt is 58.9332! Sn=a/1-r! E=mc2! Venus is approximately 108, 000, 000 kilometers away from the sun! The melting point of aluminum is 660º Celsius with a boiling point of 2,467º! 'I' before 'E' except after 'C'! The largest asteroid ever discovered is Ceres! White is the absence of all colors!"
The rest of the class started to laugh as Peter went on, then suddenly they themselves became glass-eyed.
"Noun is a name of a person, place or thing!"
"The first goblin rebellion happened in 463 BC!"
"Invertebrates are animals without backbones!"
"The innermost layer of the skin is the subcutis!"
"But soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun!"
"Dr. Gerhardus Mercator was the most famous cartographer of the 16th century!"
"Dream Potions are composed of powdered fantasy stones, asphodel, crushed phyrlixiate herbs and water from the Forbidden Spring of Eternal Slumber!"
"Peristalsis is the muscle action that causes the contraction and relaxation of the muscles when food is pushed down the esophagus!"
"Beethoven composed the Für Elise!"
"If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you poison us, do we not die? And if you wrong us, shall we not revenge?"
"There are 4 canines, 8 incisors, 16 molars and 4 wisdom teeth in a mature adult's mouth!"
Sirius, Remus and James were practically rolling on the floor, overcome by fits of laughter as their classmates quoted Shakespeare, recited equations and proclaimed the distances of heavenly bodies from one another. Professor Flitwick and Chase were the only other ones not subjected under the Sapient Charm. Sirius supposed that Flitwick had set her aside to help him do the counter-charm.
It took the whole of the last class (Potions) before the spells totally wore off, and Ridgewood, on top of being extremely vindictive to the marauders, had to deal with temporarily super-intellectual students interrupting his lessons with one scientifically accepted fact or another. Flitwick had to apologize to him since he had miscalculated the time that the counter-charms would take effect. The marauders and Chase could hardly get their Dream Potions right (even if they had all the help they could get from Martin, who continuously voiced the steps and ingredients), what with their laughing so hard.
Ridgewood, unable to control his class and would have probably spontaneously combusted if he had to put up with them any longer, finally dismissed them thirty minutes early.
They headed straight to the common room (some passing free period students were thoroughly surprised by the Gryffindors' sudden exertion of mental capacity.). Finally, twenty minutes later in the common room, the counter-charms started to work, and Sirius had a nice time teasing everybody about their two-hour and a half trances. He was just tormenting a beet-red Martin of his Romeo ramblings when Chase tapped him on the shoulder.
Martin looked relieved and escaped quietly toward the boys' staircase.
"What? I was just getting to the good part when he was play-acting Romeo's drinking the poison--"
"McGonagall's here to see you," she said, jabbing a hitchhiker thumb toward the portrait hole. "Later then," she said, patting him on the back and striding towards Lily and Celeste, who were hanging out by the ever-present fire.
Remus and James were already heading out the portrait hole. Sirius caught up to them where McGonagall was waiting.
She was carrying three new parchment compilations, each one a little bit thicker than the other. "Here are your detentions for the next few weeks. I would like to warn you, Black, that your grade in Transfiguration is heading for a long nose-dive if you do not act like a well-hackneyed student for the rest of the month--"
"You mean, I can start playing pranks again after four weeks?" Sirius said slyly.
"Don't push it, Black," McGonagall warned. (Sorry, I'm getting tired of writing 'Professor' before every name.) "As for you two," she added, turning to James and Remus, "You could only be so thankful that your grades are high enough to combat your poor conduct. And if you reach the point of Black's new record then I shall not hesitate to flunk you too." She handed them their respective detention booklets and walked off.
"Well, that was fun," Remus said dryly. "I don't know about you guys, but I'm gonna back down a little bit from now on. It was only luck that Dumbledore accepted me to Hogwarts and I'm not going to blow it over."
"Yeah, that's why you've been leading us to turn into Animagi," James scoffed.
Sirius clapped a hand to his forehead. "Animagus transformation!" he exclaimed.
"That's what I said," James answered, startled.
"No, no, what I meant is…" Sirius shook his head. "I forgot all about it."
"You forgot! But you promised that you'd practice it! We were all supposed to do it individually this year, since we're having pre-O.W.L. examinations! I've been busy half the school year helping Peter--"
"You've been teaching him?" Sirius asked.
"He's my friend too, Sirius. And Remus's," James added, glancing at the werewolf. "You can't change that."
Sirius sighed. "Oh, fine. But don't blame me when we're all running around Hogsmeade in animal form and he starts squeaking that we're doing something illegal--"
"I'll make sure of it! Now, shut up, someone might be listening in from the other side of the portrait! Let's go to the dormitory, maybe Pete's there."
They went up to their room. Peter was indeed there, doing his Potions homework and looking at it with extreme difficulty.
"Things going smoothly, Pete?" Remus asked kindly.
Peter looked up. "Remus! No, this essay about Dream Potions is horrible… I don't know if they're supposed to boil the phyrlixiate leaves in the spring water before we crush it."
"Wanna copy mine?" James offered, tossing Peter his essay.
"Oh, I can't, you've worked so hard over it, and that wouldn't be fair--"
James laughed. "That? I wrote it in barely five minutes! Don't worry about it Pete, you can just change some of the words, then Ridgewood wouldn't suspect a thing. He is that dumb anyway."
"Thanks, James," Peter said as he hurriedly scribbled. "Er--what's another word for narcolepsy?"
James and Remus were just about to answer when Sirius spoke behind him.
"Cataplexy," he responded, the usual slight cold in his eyes whenever he was looking at Peter gone.
Remus and James exchanged looks of delighted amazement, and Peter's face was relieved.
It looked like Sirius Black had waved the white flag at last.
AN - My mind's all muddled now… I don't know whether to change the category to General/Romance or let it stay as is. The humor is starting to fade anyway. Maybe it's because of all my homework. (Yeah, blame it one school ^_^) I wrote the first few chapters during the summer (April-May?), summer here at my place, anyway. I hate, hate school!!! And I've still got a stupid speech to memorize, a reflection to recopy, seven quizzes to study for…and FOUR SATURDAY CLASSES! Those damned school governors!!! Oh, sorry. Wasn't supposed to say that… Ahem, anyway, I'm not going to change the title either, even if Sirius called a truce with Peter already. Review, okay? I need all I can get if you want me to continue the next chapter through all my assignments… That is, if you're still interested in reading. (I hope you are.)