Oct 2002
Disclaimer: Same as before...
WARNING: Traitor Spoilers if you haven't read it!
You did What?!
Chapter 4 : Jacen's Holo Letter
Tenel Ka stepped into her chambers after a long day of working with the politicians of Hapes. She'd overseen the negotiation between two worlds, visited with ambassadors of several others, checked over their defensive grid and finally visited her grandmother and father. Their trip to the Hapan border had taken most of the day. She was exhausted from dodging her grandmother's not so subtle insinuations that the Hapan cluster would need another heir, and soon, if Tenel Ka continued on the course she'd chosen.
A consort. She shook her head as she pulled the tiara free from her hair. She didn't want, nor need, male attention. At least, not from just anyone. She'd been knighted, was an acknowledged Jedi in the galaxy, yet that just wasn't enough for the old matriarch. She wasn't ready to settle down yet, wasn't ready to chain herself to a man in the hopes of producing an heir. And she would not simply chain herself to one for pleasure. It wasn't that she had no interest in men, it was simply that she only had interest in one. One that had been thought dead, yet had returned to her. The barest of smiles crossed her lips for a half second before disappearing. Jacen was back. True, he was different; he'd changed so much she'd hardly recognized him, but his eyes told an amazing story. More than anything, she wanted to hear it.
She shook off the thought as she shed her royal trappings. Being the Queen Mother, she was obligated to look a certain way. She detested it. Give her a good set of lizard hide armor over the gowns and robes of state any day. On your could fight in, the other was simply too ornate. She slipped into a dressing gown and pulled the sash tight before sitting at her desk. This was her quiet time, her time for doing things she liked best. It was also her one chance to get caught up on any personal correspondences.
She checked her messages and felt her heart lurch. There, at the bottom of the list, a name jumped out at her. Jacen. Her eyes lit up as she carefully keyed in the access code. It was encrypted. He didn't want anyone but her reading it, or so it seemed. She checked for tampering first, nodding when she saw nobody else had opened it yet; her slicers either hadn't had the chance to check it, or hadn't cracked the code.
She keyed the message and chewed on her bottom lip as the encryption password came up. Password. What would Jacen put as a password that she would know? Would it be something he'd said to her when they'd last parted?
She typed in the words "May The Force Be With You" with slow strokes.
ACCESS DENIED.
Ok, so that wasn't it. She thought back, resting her chin on her palm as she stared at her screen. One down, two chances left if this encryption followed the same as others. What would only she and Jacen know that could be used as a password? She carefully typed, "This is a Fact", her concentration absolute.
ACCESS DENIED.
She made a face at the screen and simply wrote her name. Her whole name with two of her titles. "Queen Mother and Jedi Knight Tenel Ka Chume Ta' Djo".
ACCESS DENIED.
With dogged determination, she typed in the last phrase she could think of that might be a password. "Want To Hear A Joke" and blinked as the screen flashed a couple times. The holo-projector came to life on the side and a miniature of Jacen appeared on her desk. His smile was easy. Dressed in a pair of loose cut offs, he looked like he'd just gotten back from exercising. She couldn't help the thought that crossed her mind. What had he done that he had to not only encrypt but password protect his message?
"Hello Tenel Ka.
I'm sorry I had to make you guess for a password, but since you're watching this now, I know you've figured it out. I'm sorry I used something from who I was, but it was the only thing I could think of that wouldn't be thought of by anyone. Except maybe you, Jaina or Zekk. But that's neither here nor there. When we parted two months ago it was with a promise to try and get to know each other again. I know you're busy, running the consortium can't be an easy job, so I thought I'd take the first steps."
"I admit I'm nervous about explaining this to you, for to understand how I've changed you have to know what I went through. Part of my story has been told on the holo-net, I'm none too thrilled about that, but it glosses over so much. I want you to understand what happened to me on Yuuzhan'tar. I haven't told many people the whole story, but I'd like you to know."
He shifted his stance, taking a seat in front of the projector that left only his bare chest, from the waist up, and his head in view. "You noted two months ago I'd been wounded. What you didn't know is how. When you felt me die, I'd been cut off from the Force by Vergere. Vergere is a Jedi Knight from the old republic, but I didn't know it at the time. I was placed in what the Yuuzhan Vong call the "Embrace of Pain". It's aptly named I assure you. I don't know how long I spent inside it, all I know is that it was one of the first tests Vergere would put me through."
His eyes were serious as they regarded the holo emitter, and in turn, her. "It felt like an eternity of pain, yet I learned how to overcome it, to deal with it. In that respect, I now understand the Yuuzhan Vong. I understand how they're able to embrace pain and bodily suffering. They taught me that through long hours of torture. At least, that's how I viewed it at the time. Vergere insisted I was dead when she cut me off from the Force, and a part of me was dead. I wasn't living in the way that we live, I was existing only to take the next step wherever she directed me. Vergere was my only contact, and one I believed had betrayed me."
Tenel Ka hit the freeze button on the holo, letting Jacen's words sink in. They'd tortured him, teaching him the meaning of pain yet teaching him how to make it work for him. She read what he hadn't said. If she'd been able to feel him through the Force during that point of his imprisonment, she would have experienced such agony that it may have driven her mad. She looked at the frozen image, her heart aching for what he must have felt, and been through during that time. Bracing herself for the worst, she resumed his 'letter'.
"What I didn't know, was that Vergere was in reality training me to be a better Jedi. As Master Luke once had, though with a very different set of drills and techniques. She was preparing me to deal with the Yuuzhan Vong on their own terms, however I wouldn't get the chance for a long time. The Embrace of Pain forced me to deal with myself on a level I hadn't yet managed to see. It forced me to accept my weaknesses, to turn them into strengths. It helped me to accept my pain and to use it to my advantage. In doing that I no longer feel pain as acutely as I did. In fact, pain can no longer cripple me. The most important message I learned was to rely on myself. Trapped as I was, I couldn't count on anyone else coming to my rescue; if I wanted out I'd have to do it myself. "
"When I had learned the lessons the Embrace of Pain had to teach me, Vergere moved me to another chamber. She was my only link to the outside world and at times I believe I hated her. She was very good at getting what she wanted from me; she was very skilled in deception."
He paused a moment as if to collect his thoughts. "I don't know exactly how to describe what happened next. At least not in a way that will make sense to someone who hasn't been through the same experience, but I'll try. Vergere took me from the Embrace once I had freed myself; once I had learned to fight back, and took me to a room she called the Nursery, or more aptly, a playground. I was on board the Yuuzhan Vong seedship, what would become Yuuzhan'tar, and it was here that such a journey began. There were slave gangs of all races, implanted with slave seeds. I too would have one, implanted by Vergere herself."
He touched the large scar on his chest. "That is the wound you saw. These seeds allowed the dhuryams, creatures that were being bread to take the position of the World Brain of Yuuzhan'tar, to control their slave gangs. They link whoever is implanted with one, to one of the creatures. They allow the dhuryams control of motor functions and minds. When I was first implanted with the slave seed, I fought it. I had learned to deal with pain already, but none of the other slaves could. The dhuryams inflicted pain or pressure to get a slave to do its will. I wish to share with you the details of that enlightening time, but I would rather do that in person. Suffice to say I learned to communicate with the salve seed, made a friend of it if you will, and through it the dhuryam that was controlling me. I refused to be controlled."
"Oh, Jacen," she murmured softly as she paused the holo again, closing her eyes and leaning back in her chair. What must he have seen, have felt, being so cut off from everything he'd ever know? His only friend had been a backstabbing, no loyalties Fosh. Had he had friends besides Vergere? She sighed, opening her eyes. She wished he could have told her this before she'd left. She had the urge to hug him, to hold him, yet the way he told his story was calm. It was simply fact, now, the story of what had changed him. He'd accepted the reality of his imprisonment as wasn't bitter. She turned the holo on again, unable to resist. She had to know the rest of his story.
His features were serious, but she saw a calmness in his eyes that had been rare for the old Jacen. He was at peace with who he'd become. "I waged a mental war with the dhuryam that sought to control me, and though it lasted for several days, I refused to be controlled. It was after this that I learned to communicate with it. I had taught the would-be World-brain about the benefits of having allies and partners, not simply slaves. I don't know how long I spent in the nursery, watching the dhuryams slowly learn the finer points of control, but I made my place among the slave gangs. I became a medic of sorts, and even though I couldn't use the Force, there were many things I could use in the ecosystem to help heal wounds."
"I learned in that time how to communicate with the creatures the Yuuzhan Vong used for their every day uses. You might remember how empathetic I was with animals before my capture. Vergere visited me very rarely, but she said one thing I will always remember. She said, 'Which are flowers? Which are weeds? It is not only your right to choose but your responsibility.' It was through those words that I began to understand. I was told to choose and act, and I chose. I chose to see every slave as a flower and the warriors as weeds. With that in mind, I made my decision. I helped the dhuryam who was connected to my slave seed in destroying its siblings. Only one could be a World Brain. Only one could survive. One of thirteen. I made the choice of which one it would be. I don't know if I can ever explain what it was like to kill those creatures, to feel the touch of a conscious mind at my mercy yet having to destroy it all the same. I won't even try. Maybe someday I will, but," he shook his head. "Not this way."
She nodded, agreeing with him absently. She would much rather have him tell that particular story in person where she could watch him with her own eyes, rather than through a holographic projector.
He continued, shifting in his chair and she had the distinct impression he'd rather have been pacing while talking about this. That, or he wished he'd never brought it up. "I was so consumed with seeing all of the creatures dead I almost killed the one I had agreed to help. Vergere stopped me. She reminded me that though it might not know what a friend was, I did. If I had killed it, I would have killed a fundamental part of who I was and who I am today. She used her tears to make me unconscious." He smiled wryly, "Don't ask how, it's complicated and I'll explain that later too. For now, all you need to know is that her tears can be used for many things. When I woke again I was on what was Coruscant, now Yuuzhan'tar. Vergere was with me. I don't know how long I was there, but I made several discoveries, those I will explain when I see you next if you so wish."
His grin was impish, reminiscent of the boy he'd been. "I'm saying that alot, but I intend to keep those promises. It was here I faced some of my greatest challenges. I had to convince the Yuuzhan Vong I was completely converted to their philosophies, to their beliefs. It was here that they hatched their plans for me to capture Jaina and have me kill her. I'm not sure if Vergere knew that I knew that, but I know the way they think. I learned to think like they did. In doing so I learned to outsmart them. Ganner, you remember Ganner Rhysode right? Anyway, to make a long story short, Ganner fell into a trap we had set for Jaina. He was brought back to Yuuzhan'tar with the intention of offering him as a sacrifice. Once the World Brain had been chosen and installed on Coruscant, I was no longer allowed contact with it. I'd tried to kill it, why would it want to talk to me anyway."
Her heart went out to him. His tone when he spoke those words spoke volumes. Guilt about trying to kill a creature he'd come to admire, even if it was a Yuuzhan Vong creation. Admiration for the World Brain, and something else she couldn't identify. She could see why he'd never spoken to anyone else about his captivity, at least not all of it. Jacen might have accepted what had happened whole-heartedly, but the changes in him were still so new and different, beaten into him by circumstance, he was still adapting. Even months after being free, of being stronger than before, he was privately going over some of the events. She paid close attention as his story began to come to a close.
"I managed to convince the Yuuzhan Vong that I was a loyal defector and promised to sacrifice Ganner. He wasn't too thrilled about the prospect as you can imagine, but it was a ruse to get me down into the World Brain cavern. Ganner... Ganner died on his feet, blocking the way to me... and the World Brain. Vergere tells me he's going to go down as a Yuuzhan Vong legend. I think he'd like that, don't you?" he sighed. "Vergere and I managed to escape and we made our way to Calamari. Ask me what happened with the World Brain sometime. It's a tale that takes some explaining, and one I don't think I can do right now."
She watched his face as he stood, his tale at an end. "And now you know what happened to me, most of it anyway. I hope that it will give you a better of understanding of who and what I've become. I had to become self sufficient in order to survive. I didn't just survive; I thrived. Of all the Jedi in the galaxy, you're the one I think who will understand the hardship of being forced into circumstances beyond your control. I hope I haven't scared you off, Tenel Ka, if anything, I hope I've brought you closer."
She allowed a small smile to cross her lips as he reached up to shut off the holo emitter and paused the holo, taking in his strong features and stance. He was truly remarkable. How had he not only survived by thrived in an environment set on destroying him? Somehow he'd managed. He'd come back a changed person, a better person. She gently let her fingers rest on the holo image, feeling nothing but still feeling closer to him. She pushed the resume button to let the message finish and shut off automatically.
"Oh, and Tenel Ka." His lips quirked in the trademark Solo grin, bringing her attention back to his face. "When this run I'm on is all over, hopefully before the end of the war, and I see you again, I have every intention of picking up where we left off... that is, if you have no objection. Good day, Queen Mother of Hapes, I miss you and think of you. Until we meet again."
She laughed. She couldn't help it. There was still a part of the old Jacen in him yet, and that was more reassuring than anything. With their old ties they could build new ones. New ones that would sustain their future. And that was worth everything they'd both been through. Shutting off the holo projector she rose and headed for her bed. It had been a long day and she had much to think about.
Disclaimer: Same as before...
WARNING: Traitor Spoilers if you haven't read it!
You did What?!
Chapter 4 : Jacen's Holo Letter
Tenel Ka stepped into her chambers after a long day of working with the politicians of Hapes. She'd overseen the negotiation between two worlds, visited with ambassadors of several others, checked over their defensive grid and finally visited her grandmother and father. Their trip to the Hapan border had taken most of the day. She was exhausted from dodging her grandmother's not so subtle insinuations that the Hapan cluster would need another heir, and soon, if Tenel Ka continued on the course she'd chosen.
A consort. She shook her head as she pulled the tiara free from her hair. She didn't want, nor need, male attention. At least, not from just anyone. She'd been knighted, was an acknowledged Jedi in the galaxy, yet that just wasn't enough for the old matriarch. She wasn't ready to settle down yet, wasn't ready to chain herself to a man in the hopes of producing an heir. And she would not simply chain herself to one for pleasure. It wasn't that she had no interest in men, it was simply that she only had interest in one. One that had been thought dead, yet had returned to her. The barest of smiles crossed her lips for a half second before disappearing. Jacen was back. True, he was different; he'd changed so much she'd hardly recognized him, but his eyes told an amazing story. More than anything, she wanted to hear it.
She shook off the thought as she shed her royal trappings. Being the Queen Mother, she was obligated to look a certain way. She detested it. Give her a good set of lizard hide armor over the gowns and robes of state any day. On your could fight in, the other was simply too ornate. She slipped into a dressing gown and pulled the sash tight before sitting at her desk. This was her quiet time, her time for doing things she liked best. It was also her one chance to get caught up on any personal correspondences.
She checked her messages and felt her heart lurch. There, at the bottom of the list, a name jumped out at her. Jacen. Her eyes lit up as she carefully keyed in the access code. It was encrypted. He didn't want anyone but her reading it, or so it seemed. She checked for tampering first, nodding when she saw nobody else had opened it yet; her slicers either hadn't had the chance to check it, or hadn't cracked the code.
She keyed the message and chewed on her bottom lip as the encryption password came up. Password. What would Jacen put as a password that she would know? Would it be something he'd said to her when they'd last parted?
She typed in the words "May The Force Be With You" with slow strokes.
ACCESS DENIED.
Ok, so that wasn't it. She thought back, resting her chin on her palm as she stared at her screen. One down, two chances left if this encryption followed the same as others. What would only she and Jacen know that could be used as a password? She carefully typed, "This is a Fact", her concentration absolute.
ACCESS DENIED.
She made a face at the screen and simply wrote her name. Her whole name with two of her titles. "Queen Mother and Jedi Knight Tenel Ka Chume Ta' Djo".
ACCESS DENIED.
With dogged determination, she typed in the last phrase she could think of that might be a password. "Want To Hear A Joke" and blinked as the screen flashed a couple times. The holo-projector came to life on the side and a miniature of Jacen appeared on her desk. His smile was easy. Dressed in a pair of loose cut offs, he looked like he'd just gotten back from exercising. She couldn't help the thought that crossed her mind. What had he done that he had to not only encrypt but password protect his message?
"Hello Tenel Ka.
I'm sorry I had to make you guess for a password, but since you're watching this now, I know you've figured it out. I'm sorry I used something from who I was, but it was the only thing I could think of that wouldn't be thought of by anyone. Except maybe you, Jaina or Zekk. But that's neither here nor there. When we parted two months ago it was with a promise to try and get to know each other again. I know you're busy, running the consortium can't be an easy job, so I thought I'd take the first steps."
"I admit I'm nervous about explaining this to you, for to understand how I've changed you have to know what I went through. Part of my story has been told on the holo-net, I'm none too thrilled about that, but it glosses over so much. I want you to understand what happened to me on Yuuzhan'tar. I haven't told many people the whole story, but I'd like you to know."
He shifted his stance, taking a seat in front of the projector that left only his bare chest, from the waist up, and his head in view. "You noted two months ago I'd been wounded. What you didn't know is how. When you felt me die, I'd been cut off from the Force by Vergere. Vergere is a Jedi Knight from the old republic, but I didn't know it at the time. I was placed in what the Yuuzhan Vong call the "Embrace of Pain". It's aptly named I assure you. I don't know how long I spent inside it, all I know is that it was one of the first tests Vergere would put me through."
His eyes were serious as they regarded the holo emitter, and in turn, her. "It felt like an eternity of pain, yet I learned how to overcome it, to deal with it. In that respect, I now understand the Yuuzhan Vong. I understand how they're able to embrace pain and bodily suffering. They taught me that through long hours of torture. At least, that's how I viewed it at the time. Vergere insisted I was dead when she cut me off from the Force, and a part of me was dead. I wasn't living in the way that we live, I was existing only to take the next step wherever she directed me. Vergere was my only contact, and one I believed had betrayed me."
Tenel Ka hit the freeze button on the holo, letting Jacen's words sink in. They'd tortured him, teaching him the meaning of pain yet teaching him how to make it work for him. She read what he hadn't said. If she'd been able to feel him through the Force during that point of his imprisonment, she would have experienced such agony that it may have driven her mad. She looked at the frozen image, her heart aching for what he must have felt, and been through during that time. Bracing herself for the worst, she resumed his 'letter'.
"What I didn't know, was that Vergere was in reality training me to be a better Jedi. As Master Luke once had, though with a very different set of drills and techniques. She was preparing me to deal with the Yuuzhan Vong on their own terms, however I wouldn't get the chance for a long time. The Embrace of Pain forced me to deal with myself on a level I hadn't yet managed to see. It forced me to accept my weaknesses, to turn them into strengths. It helped me to accept my pain and to use it to my advantage. In doing that I no longer feel pain as acutely as I did. In fact, pain can no longer cripple me. The most important message I learned was to rely on myself. Trapped as I was, I couldn't count on anyone else coming to my rescue; if I wanted out I'd have to do it myself. "
"When I had learned the lessons the Embrace of Pain had to teach me, Vergere moved me to another chamber. She was my only link to the outside world and at times I believe I hated her. She was very good at getting what she wanted from me; she was very skilled in deception."
He paused a moment as if to collect his thoughts. "I don't know exactly how to describe what happened next. At least not in a way that will make sense to someone who hasn't been through the same experience, but I'll try. Vergere took me from the Embrace once I had freed myself; once I had learned to fight back, and took me to a room she called the Nursery, or more aptly, a playground. I was on board the Yuuzhan Vong seedship, what would become Yuuzhan'tar, and it was here that such a journey began. There were slave gangs of all races, implanted with slave seeds. I too would have one, implanted by Vergere herself."
He touched the large scar on his chest. "That is the wound you saw. These seeds allowed the dhuryams, creatures that were being bread to take the position of the World Brain of Yuuzhan'tar, to control their slave gangs. They link whoever is implanted with one, to one of the creatures. They allow the dhuryams control of motor functions and minds. When I was first implanted with the slave seed, I fought it. I had learned to deal with pain already, but none of the other slaves could. The dhuryams inflicted pain or pressure to get a slave to do its will. I wish to share with you the details of that enlightening time, but I would rather do that in person. Suffice to say I learned to communicate with the salve seed, made a friend of it if you will, and through it the dhuryam that was controlling me. I refused to be controlled."
"Oh, Jacen," she murmured softly as she paused the holo again, closing her eyes and leaning back in her chair. What must he have seen, have felt, being so cut off from everything he'd ever know? His only friend had been a backstabbing, no loyalties Fosh. Had he had friends besides Vergere? She sighed, opening her eyes. She wished he could have told her this before she'd left. She had the urge to hug him, to hold him, yet the way he told his story was calm. It was simply fact, now, the story of what had changed him. He'd accepted the reality of his imprisonment as wasn't bitter. She turned the holo on again, unable to resist. She had to know the rest of his story.
His features were serious, but she saw a calmness in his eyes that had been rare for the old Jacen. He was at peace with who he'd become. "I waged a mental war with the dhuryam that sought to control me, and though it lasted for several days, I refused to be controlled. It was after this that I learned to communicate with it. I had taught the would-be World-brain about the benefits of having allies and partners, not simply slaves. I don't know how long I spent in the nursery, watching the dhuryams slowly learn the finer points of control, but I made my place among the slave gangs. I became a medic of sorts, and even though I couldn't use the Force, there were many things I could use in the ecosystem to help heal wounds."
"I learned in that time how to communicate with the creatures the Yuuzhan Vong used for their every day uses. You might remember how empathetic I was with animals before my capture. Vergere visited me very rarely, but she said one thing I will always remember. She said, 'Which are flowers? Which are weeds? It is not only your right to choose but your responsibility.' It was through those words that I began to understand. I was told to choose and act, and I chose. I chose to see every slave as a flower and the warriors as weeds. With that in mind, I made my decision. I helped the dhuryam who was connected to my slave seed in destroying its siblings. Only one could be a World Brain. Only one could survive. One of thirteen. I made the choice of which one it would be. I don't know if I can ever explain what it was like to kill those creatures, to feel the touch of a conscious mind at my mercy yet having to destroy it all the same. I won't even try. Maybe someday I will, but," he shook his head. "Not this way."
She nodded, agreeing with him absently. She would much rather have him tell that particular story in person where she could watch him with her own eyes, rather than through a holographic projector.
He continued, shifting in his chair and she had the distinct impression he'd rather have been pacing while talking about this. That, or he wished he'd never brought it up. "I was so consumed with seeing all of the creatures dead I almost killed the one I had agreed to help. Vergere stopped me. She reminded me that though it might not know what a friend was, I did. If I had killed it, I would have killed a fundamental part of who I was and who I am today. She used her tears to make me unconscious." He smiled wryly, "Don't ask how, it's complicated and I'll explain that later too. For now, all you need to know is that her tears can be used for many things. When I woke again I was on what was Coruscant, now Yuuzhan'tar. Vergere was with me. I don't know how long I was there, but I made several discoveries, those I will explain when I see you next if you so wish."
His grin was impish, reminiscent of the boy he'd been. "I'm saying that alot, but I intend to keep those promises. It was here I faced some of my greatest challenges. I had to convince the Yuuzhan Vong I was completely converted to their philosophies, to their beliefs. It was here that they hatched their plans for me to capture Jaina and have me kill her. I'm not sure if Vergere knew that I knew that, but I know the way they think. I learned to think like they did. In doing so I learned to outsmart them. Ganner, you remember Ganner Rhysode right? Anyway, to make a long story short, Ganner fell into a trap we had set for Jaina. He was brought back to Yuuzhan'tar with the intention of offering him as a sacrifice. Once the World Brain had been chosen and installed on Coruscant, I was no longer allowed contact with it. I'd tried to kill it, why would it want to talk to me anyway."
Her heart went out to him. His tone when he spoke those words spoke volumes. Guilt about trying to kill a creature he'd come to admire, even if it was a Yuuzhan Vong creation. Admiration for the World Brain, and something else she couldn't identify. She could see why he'd never spoken to anyone else about his captivity, at least not all of it. Jacen might have accepted what had happened whole-heartedly, but the changes in him were still so new and different, beaten into him by circumstance, he was still adapting. Even months after being free, of being stronger than before, he was privately going over some of the events. She paid close attention as his story began to come to a close.
"I managed to convince the Yuuzhan Vong that I was a loyal defector and promised to sacrifice Ganner. He wasn't too thrilled about the prospect as you can imagine, but it was a ruse to get me down into the World Brain cavern. Ganner... Ganner died on his feet, blocking the way to me... and the World Brain. Vergere tells me he's going to go down as a Yuuzhan Vong legend. I think he'd like that, don't you?" he sighed. "Vergere and I managed to escape and we made our way to Calamari. Ask me what happened with the World Brain sometime. It's a tale that takes some explaining, and one I don't think I can do right now."
She watched his face as he stood, his tale at an end. "And now you know what happened to me, most of it anyway. I hope that it will give you a better of understanding of who and what I've become. I had to become self sufficient in order to survive. I didn't just survive; I thrived. Of all the Jedi in the galaxy, you're the one I think who will understand the hardship of being forced into circumstances beyond your control. I hope I haven't scared you off, Tenel Ka, if anything, I hope I've brought you closer."
She allowed a small smile to cross her lips as he reached up to shut off the holo emitter and paused the holo, taking in his strong features and stance. He was truly remarkable. How had he not only survived by thrived in an environment set on destroying him? Somehow he'd managed. He'd come back a changed person, a better person. She gently let her fingers rest on the holo image, feeling nothing but still feeling closer to him. She pushed the resume button to let the message finish and shut off automatically.
"Oh, and Tenel Ka." His lips quirked in the trademark Solo grin, bringing her attention back to his face. "When this run I'm on is all over, hopefully before the end of the war, and I see you again, I have every intention of picking up where we left off... that is, if you have no objection. Good day, Queen Mother of Hapes, I miss you and think of you. Until we meet again."
She laughed. She couldn't help it. There was still a part of the old Jacen in him yet, and that was more reassuring than anything. With their old ties they could build new ones. New ones that would sustain their future. And that was worth everything they'd both been through. Shutting off the holo projector she rose and headed for her bed. It had been a long day and she had much to think about.