A/N: Sorry for the grammar. Please understand I learn English in a public school as a second language while it's actually my third. So please, humor me. Oh, and it's Remus' PoV.

Prologue

I am sitting on the fire steps of his apartment, waiting. I don't know what for, but it seemed the right thing to do. I look again at the parchment in my hands. It makes me sad, like an 'F' I've received for the last fifteen years of my life. Another thing I did wrong, but instead of making something right I am sitting here. Waiting… I don't even know for what, for whom. Maybe for him, though I know he can't come here.

For the last half year everything swirled so fast around me. I didn't even notice the force of it until now. When powerless and tired I came here. Here, of all places.

And I don't know what to do. That parchment in my hands tells me I've reached a dead end in my path, and I have no where to turn, that I should've turned when I had a chance, when there was another path to walk on. And now I can only sit and wonder. Because my path has ended.

Maybe that's why I got married, the clear pattern, the straight path of life that seemed so right and obvious. The wolf took so much of my self-control in the full moon, I felt I had to control every little detail in the rest of the month. Eventually it swallowed me, like a great tidal wave, and before I've noticed I was carried away by the stream. Following that path of school-crier-marriage that I though I've chosen.

It could have carried on for the rest of my life hadn't Amanda decided she wasn't happy with me. She felt I wasn't in love with her, and she was right, I just hadn't noticed. We tried counseling and a bunch of other things, but it didn't work. And we got divorced.

The divorce seemed so right, so fitting. Everything I needed. An opportunity to go back down the path and take the turn I've missed. To go against that stream which carried me more far than I've wanted to go. Only in sleepless nights I've remembered the one time I've swam against the stream.

It was my bachelor party. It was supposed to be a quiet evening out, just us, the Marauders. We drank a lot, and laughed even more, and above the whole evening floated a tragic feeling that meant only one thing. We finally grew up, the Marauders weren't marauders anymore. Just a bunch of twenty-one years old men, who were soldiers in a terrible war and tried to have a descent, quiet life from fight to fight.

Peter was the first to leave, saying he had other business to attend, he seldom stayed with us for long those days. James was the next to say his goodbyes, Lily was waiting for him and he didn't like to leave her alone for long, even if she was only in the third month of her pregnancy. That left Sirius and me.

We apparated to his apartment, because Amanda and her friends were in ours. It started as a talk, a different talk than any of the talks I've ever had with him. It was a deep conversation about life and love and attraction and anything we could think about. And for the first time in my life I felt a connection to someone, which meant more than friendship or pure attraction. It was a true bond, a one I've never thought I was capable to have. Something no run in the forbidden forest and no plan to trick Snape could produce.

And then he kissed me, long and hard. And I responded to him. We spent the night making love to each other. Not fucking, not even shagging, but making love. And it was bloody amazing, exploring his body and feeling his hands and mouth study mine. In the morning, when I woke up on tangled sheets, in the arms of one of my best friends, he asked me if I'm still going to merry Amanda. And I nodded.

After that night I saw him only twice. The next day at my wedding, when he stood in the crowd and looked at Amanda and I as we said our vows. He didn't even stay for the reception. The second time was six months later, when Harry was born. We talked, like two old classmates talk, and I still remember the last words he told me. "Yeah, we should keep in touch." As if he knew I was glad we seldom met, because the less I saw him the more I could believe the path I've taken is the right one.

After what happened I wanted to move away, leave England for good. Amanda insisted we move to her birth town in Ireland and we did. It was an easy life, even for a werewolf; I taught in the local school and Amanda worked in an herb shop. We were happy, or at least I liked to believe we were.

After the divorce I fled from Ireland. Not knowing where to go, I went here, to London and to these bloody fire steps. Looking for the turn I saw here the time I was lying on a bed just a few feet from these fire steps.

An owl reaches me and I open the letter, putting the parchment aside. A job offer, from Dumbledore. I smile sadly. The turn I looked for isn't here anymore, and it will never appear again, just like Sirius, it is locked in cell in Azkaban. But there are different turns to take, maybe just as good.