Kelly and Laetura were having breakfast when Gato returned home. Before he
could say anything, Kelly said, "Where were you all night, young man?"
Gato frowned. "How do you know I'm not coming home from an early morning walk?"
Laetura picked up Kelly's empty dish and walked it to the sink. "Same clothes from the day before. You haven't shaved today either, and you always shave."
"Nothing gets past you." He went over to the milk crates he used as a dresser and started pulling out clean clothes. "Where's my backpack?"
"In the hall closet," Laetura told him.
"How was Nina?" Kelly asked.
Laetura handed Gato his empty backpack. "I sense a man to man talk coming. I'll go to the store for more cereal." She picked up her purse and left.
"So much for waiting for Mrs. Anavel Gato," Kelly told him.
"Duty called."
"Looks like you're going back for more."
Gato nodded. "I said I'd spend the rest of the weekend with her. I'll be back Monday night. I need some clean clothes, a new toothbrush, that kind of thing."
"You feel like James Bond?" Kelly asked with a grin.
Gato didn't smile back. "I feel like a right bastard."
"Sorry."
Gato sat down beside Kelly. "She's grating. She's moody. She's high- maintenance and clingy. She panicked this morning when she found I wasn't still in bed because I was up making her breakfast. On the surface, Nina's not the sort of woman I'd choose as my lover in a million years. There could be other ways to get at her secrets."
"So what changed your mind?"
Gato's expression softened. "She arranged for me to take out a Zaku."
"What? You're kidding."
"No. Last night, we went out for a ride. I couldn't believe it. It almost made me feel human again."
"Like a whole person," Kelly mumbled.
"Exactly. Like a--" Gato cut himself off. "Forgive me, my friend. That was insensitive of me."
"It's all right. I'm doing fine."
"Despite all her shortcomings, Nina's just given me the gift of dignity which I've missed these past few months. Otherwise I'd have just kept stringing her along with dinner and little presents until the time when I could conveniently dope her and get into her briefcase. But now, this is serious. To complete my mission, I'm going to have to be a cad."
"You know, I always looked forward to the day you'd come home with JBF hair and I'd be able to give you hell over it. Gato, your sense of honour has ruined even that. Good thing I never took you to a whorehouse; you'd insist on writing thank you notes and sending flowers the next day."
"Probably. That's how I was raised, and it'd be a better world if we all functioned that way, thank you."
There was one last thing to do. Gato met Tetley in a park a mile or so from Anaheim. Tetley looked up from feeding the ducks and said, "You're late."
"I know, but you won't mind the reason," Gato said. "I have entry to Nina Purpleton's apartment now."
"Really? Excellent. Is this just a one time thing, or likely to go on for a while?"
"I'm on my way back there now."
Tetley took some money out of his pocket. "Take her out to dinner."
Nina met him at the door of her apartment. She was dressed again and flung her arms around his neck. "You're back. I was starting to worry, after what you told me your neighbourhood was like."
"I forgot that I had some laundry to do."
Nina grinned. "Handsome, smart, polite, and tidy too! You are a keeper, aren't you?"
Nina awakened late Sunday night to the sound of Anavel whimpering in his sleep. He was turned on his side away from her, tossing his head against the pillow. Nina sat up and lay a careful hand on his shoulder. "Anavel," she said softly. "Anavel?"
On the third repetition of his name he came to. "Where am I?"
"You're in my apartment. You're safe."
Gato rolled onto his back and brushed his loosened hair from his forehead. He reached for Nina and pulled her against his chest.
"Were you dreaming about the war?" she asked.
"Kind of. It was just a nightmare, you know they never make sense." His arms tightened around her and Nina squeezed back comfortingly. She knew he wasn't telling her the truth, but reasoned that if he wanted to tell her about his dream, he would.
Nina was correct. Gato figured she didn't need to know the details, that he'd been commanding a ship where the crew were all missing body parts. There had been no blood, and the soldiers seemed completely at ease despite going without arms, legs, and in some cases even heads. He was wondering what had brought him to such a macabre command when he'd looked down and noticed that somewhere along the line, he'd lost both his legs.
He lay awake for most of the night, listening to Nina's soft breathing and occasional little snore until he drowsed off again near dawn.
As they were getting ready for work, Nina said, "You know, I don't think we should tell anybody about us."
"Why not?"
"Anaheim's got some really old-fashioned attitudes about their employees' personal lives. I know we don't really work together, but it's probably better if we don't let on that...that..."
"We've become lovers," Gato said, finishing the thought for her.
"Yeah. Exactly."
"I agree. If only because I don't think I could handle all the giggles from your co-workers every time I came in to deliver the mail."
She laughed. "That would be pretty bad, wouldn't it? Okay. It's our secret."
"Our secret." They linked little fingers and kissed to close the deal.
"You look unusually mellow today," Gato's supervisor commented when he came in.
Gato started investigating Nina's personal library the next Saturday while she was in the shower. She kept professional journals and composition books filled with notes on the shelves. In a recent journal he found passages underlined about making armour lightweight but resistant against radiation. Paragraphs were marked with exclamation points and comments such as, "Suggest to Dr. Vane". He tucked two of them into his backpack just as he heard the water stop running and returned them to the shelves the next weekend. If Nina noticed, she never said anything.
"Nuclear resistant armour. Advances on the vernians," Tetley recited to himself as he and Gato walked in the park. "Have you found anything yet on the armaments these Gundams will carry?"
"No. That's a different Research and Development section altogether. If only we knew the reason they needed all this protection against radiation."
"To make them immune against being hit in the reactor?"
"Then why have it all on the suit's limbs, and that heavy?" Gato crossed his arms. "If only I had a reason to be alone in her apartment. I must get into her laptop. I'll have to see if I can talk her into giving me a key."
Tetley patted him on the shoulder. "Do your best."
Later that week, another canvas trolley of paper was rolled over to Gato's shredder. Recently the well had run dry as far as anything new came along and it was getting harder and harder to hold his concentration as he shuffled through pounds and pounds of paper before loading it into the shredder. He took a few mouthfuls of coffee to stay alert, fastened his hair back more securely, and turned the machine on.
Junk, junk, junk, junk. Hm, Paula's birthday was coming up. Crap, that meant he'd have to go with Nina to buy her a present. Junk, junk, junk--
"Hello, what's this?" he murmured to himself as he pulled out a computer- generated sketch. Gato glanced around quickly then studied the image. On normal letter-sized paper, it was a line drawing of the Physalis. On it was written the note: "Yes, it's only going to be 83 tons. This is not a joke. NP."
In another hand was an arrow pointing to the arms with a note back saying, "Not with a cooling system like this it's not. Back to the drawing board with you. Dr. Vane."
Gato folded the sheet quickly and slipped it into his pocket. It must have been a mistake that the sketch got as far as the mailroom because nothing else like it materialized.
When Gato came home that night, Laetura and Kelly were waiting for him with a bottle of sparkling non-alcoholic cider. Laetura popped it as soon as he came in.
"Um, what's the occasion?"
Kelly took the bottle from her and poured. "Tetley was over. For the rest of my pension, they went ahead and bought us a scrapyard."
"It's got a house on it!" Laetura exclaimed in delight. "I can have a garden, and there's space for a baby's room and everything."
Gato caught the look of fear that appeared in Kelly's eyes but said nothing. Obviously the two were going to have to discuss a few things. "When are we moving?"
"Laetura and I will move in a couple of weeks, after we close. You move as soon as you can find yourself a place."
"Find myself a place?"
"You've got a job," Kelly reminded him.
"There's a 0.4 vacancy rate, Kelly, and my income is a joke!"
"Look, I wish we could do something else, but Laetura and I have decided to get married, and it'd just be too weird to have you still living with us. Plus it's out of commuting range from Anaheim."
Gato sipped at his cider and winced. It tasted sulphuric. "So when's the wedding?"
"We'll do that before we move in," Laetura said. "Bring along your girlfriend. We want to meet her, and this way she'll see us as we're starting off on a new life together." She took Kelly's hand and smiled up at him.
The next day, Gato wrote a note and slid it into an inter-office envelope. He delivered it to Nina along with the rest of her mail. When he came through that afternoon with the second delivery, she handed it back to him.
Neither of them noticed Lucette, who had caught Gato's handwriting over Nina's shoulder.
Gato appeared at Nina's door that evening. They sat down on the couch and she asked, "Why are your roommates kicking you out?"
"They're getting married and they bought themselves a house."
"That's a good reason."
"What am I going to do?"
"Why don't you live with me?"
Gato looked down at her, seeing Tetley's behind-the-scenes manoevers slide neatly into place. "You mean that?"
"Why not? You spend three nights a week here. You keep your clothes and a spare toothbrush here. It wouldn't be that much of a change." Nina linked arms with him. "Anavel, you shouldn't have worried. I would never let you go back to the street. I couldn't ever do that because I love you."
He gazed down incoherently. "You do?"
"Yes!" She hugged him tightly. "You're the first man ever to really understand why mobile suits are my passion. The guys I've dated before just thought it was a funny thing for a girl to be doing and kept me around for my looks. When they realized I was more than just a cute blonde with a knack for machinery, it was over. I don't have to worry about that with you. Plus, you've trusted me with your secrets. Of course I love you."
"Oh." Gato struggled with what to say next. "Nina. You're so good to me."
"I don't imagine you have much."
"No, I don't."
She smiled and squeezed his arm with both of hers. "Well why don't you go get it? I'll spring for a taxi for you to bring it all back over here. No use staying where you're not wanted!"
It was early evening. Laetura was still at work and Kelly was gone too. Gato hung up his jacket and went into the closet for the dufflebag he'd been carrying when they first moved to Laetura's.
It wasn't quite empty. Since he was alone, he decided to allow himself one private moment with his past.
In the bottom of the bag was a flat plastic box. He brought it out and opened it up. Neatly folded inside was his dark green uniform with the tunic on top. The epaulets were tucked into plastic bags of their own at the corners, the belt at the bottom. He reached in and stroked the crisp gabardine of the tunic, the velvet of the cape and panels with their heavy gold embroidery. He remembered the day he'd first put on one of these uniforms as a green ensign straight out of the Academy. That had been 21 years of ambition and dreams achieved.
He lifted the tunic out of the box and held it folded on his lap. At least he had his. Kelly's uniform was lost. After being pulled mangled and bleeding from his wounded mobile suit he'd never had the chance to retrieve it. Gato's habit was to always carry a spare uniform with him, allowing one to survive the destruction of the Doroa and the taking of A Bao A Qu.
The door opened and Gato jumped. It was Kelly, who looked at the uniform in Gato's hands and said, "Sorry, I didn't realize you needed some privacy. I thought you were just jacking off or something."
"I might as well be." Gato put the tunic back in its box. "I take that back. If I were fapping, it would have the useful side effect of leaving me relaxed." He clicked the lid shut.
Kelly lifted a corner of the rug and picked up a loose floorboard. He pulled out a bottle of bourbon and held it between his knees to uncap it. He held it out to Gato. "You look like you need this. What's going on?"
"Nina's come to my rescue by offering to let me live with her."
"Y'know, most guys would be happy about that." Kelly raised a hand before Gato could say a word. "I know, I know. You feel like you're taking advantage of her so you can get mobile suit secrets. Well, you're not. Here's what you do. You move in, you bring her flowers every week, you do your share of the housework-very important-and you bang her every night. What more could she ask for?"
"Honesty," Gato said.
Kelly grinned. "She really has gotten to you, hasn't she? Think of it this way, pal. Don't you want Nina to live in a world ruled by Jion? Wouldn't she be better off? You said she lives in a crappy one-room apartment. Back home she'd be given a house, paid more, treated like the genius she is. You're not betraying her, Gato, you're getting her recognition."
Gato considered this for a moment, then smiled. "Of course, Kelly. I hadn't thought of it that way. She is treated shabbily by Anaheim."
"Damn straight she is. So go back in there, tiger, and find out what's going on in that woman's scary little brain."
"Why do you say her brain is scary?"
"Cause she's a woman."
"Then, what are our brains?"
Kelly smiled. "Too slow to be afraid."
Gato opened the door to find Nina standing by a table set for two. She was lighting some candles. "I called for delivery food," she explained. "I wanted your first night home to be special. You can go put away your clothes in the meantime."
He went over to the sleeping area. They had long ago moved the bed so that they could both get out of it easily. He sat on his side of the bed to unzip his duffle and looked up.
On the wall facing him, she'd hung a Jion flag. Gato blinked at it as a tangled mire of emotion filled his heart. Nina sat down on the bed beside him.
"I didn't know how you'd feel about that. If you're offended, you can take it down."
"No. I'm feeling many things on seeing my country's flag, but offended is most definitely not one of them. It's a very welcoming gesture indeed." He put his arms around Nina and kissed her.
###
Kelly's and Laetura's wedding was a quiet affair in a registry office with only Gato and Nina as witnesses. Gato and Kelly had spent Kelly's last night as a free man camping in the empty apartment as Laetura put the finishing touches on the house. The party for a few friends was thus both a housewarming and a wedding party.
Nina admired Laetura's creativity. "Wow," she said, "You've done a lot in here with..."
"Go ahead and say it," Laetura said. "With next to nothing. And I'm real proud of that. Just over a year ago, I was a junkie on welfare. Now I own a house and do the books for my husband's business. And not just any old joe, I landed me a dang Jion officer! Whoohoo!" She held up her soft drink in a toast to herself.
"You've got a lot to be proud of," Miriam said. To Nina she explained, "Laetura waitressed for pay at the Kitchen, but between meals, she was learning book-keeping. She's very good at it, too."
"I think we'll do fine," Laetura said. "Maybe not rich, but that's okay. Kelly's already been fiddling with some stuff this creepy woman brought by for him to fix."
"Creepy how?" Nina asked.
Laetura frowned. "Hard to say. Real tall, long black hair, Jion accent. There was something wrong about her though. Like I said, creepy. But she gave him money up front. Still," Laetura shook her head, "I hope nothing happens about that. It felt like trouble."
Nina laughed. "Jions are always trouble. They show up in our lives and next thing we know, they're sleeping beside us."
Laetura snorted. "I don't want this one sleeping beside me! All I want is Kelly, and he just swore to want me, and only me. So there."
"Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god," swore Kelly into his one remaining hand. He pulled it away from his face and stared in terror at his wedding ring. "Gato, what did I just do?"
Gato was leaning against the wall of the warehouse, arms crossed, glowering at his friend. "Looked to me like you got married."
"Aargh. Why did I do that?"
Gato glared. "I was under the impression that you loved the woman."
"I do. This is just so...final."
"You're being stupid. I know I didn't approve of Laetura at first. I've changed my opinion of her because I've seen how devoted she is to you. When she looks at you, she doesn't see a crippled Jion soldier. She sees what I see, a proud officer who was honourably wounded while courageously fighting for our freedom. There's nothing wrong with being retired and starting a new life with a good woman."
"No, there isn't. Except another possibility just came up." Kelly walked over to a cloth-draped object the size of two large cars and pulled the cloth away. Gato gasped.
"That's a cockpit!"
"Yes. It's for a mobile armour. I've been given the money to start repairing it, for the war effort."
"For the Delaz fleet?"
Kelly nodded.
"Tetley brought this by?"
"No, I didn't," Tetley's voice said from the doorway. Gato and Kelly both jumped. Tetley was dressed in civilian clothes and carrying a shopping bag. "Cima Garahau did. I'm not Delaz's only subordinate, you know."
"Cima Garahau?" Gato said. "The Butcher of Iffish?"
"Yes, well Delaz doesn't see it that way," said Tetley. "I've worked with her myself and I will confess that I don't either. Lt. Layzner, congratulations on your marriage. I brought by some gifts for the new house. I hope your bride doesn't already have a food processor?"
"She doesn't, and she'll be thrilled," Kelly said. "We should all go inside."
"Not yet," Tetley said, closing the door of the warehouse. "Lt. Gato, now that you're living with Nina Purpleton, do you think you can convince her to go somewhere without you? To visit family, friends, a trip with girlfriends?"
"I don't know. Probably."
"When you do, let me know. This is my pager number." He handed Gato a card with it. "Don't call me for any other reason. I'll send a computer cracker over and you, he, and Layzner can make a day of getting to the bottom of this Physalis mystery."
Gato nodded. "It'll be my pleasure."
"Now let's get inside or your ladies will get suspicious." Tetley slid the door back open and they returned to the house.
###
"Whenever I go to a wedding, I always wish I had a magic crystal ball to see how it all ends," Nina said when she and Gato had returned home. "Kelly and Laetura are kind of a weird couple, but I like them. They're both really strong people. They've come through a lot. I admire that."
Gato pulled off his tie and hung it up neatly. He heard Nina turn on the radio and go into the bathroom. He changed from his dress clothes into a t- shirt and jeans and sat down on the bed, waiting for her to emerge. Nina came out wearing a worn cotton dress she liked. She sat down across Gato's lap and hugged him.
"Do you think we could be that happy together someday?" she asked.
Not wanting to lie, Gato told her, "We can hope, can't we?"
"I know I do," Nina said.
The song changed and Gato helped Nina off his lap. She started to protest, but stopped when he took her into his arms and started slow-dancing with her.
"You mean you like this kind of song?" she asked.
"Hush," Gato told her.
Don't come to me, just cause you're lonely tonight/Lonely's only part of your game/Long as you live, you must remember one thing/Give and take are one and the same
So tell me are you ready, really, really ready/Cause I don't want your love for one night.
Nina raised her eyes to Gato's. He was smiling at her gently.
Cause I'm not looking for a love affair/I need the magic when I hold you near/It's more important than a one night stand/I need the magic when I touch your hand.*
Nina reached up and undid his hair. It fell forward and covered both their faces as they kissed. Gato followed that with little nibbles on her cheek and ear which made Nina giggle softly until he lifted her in his arms and carried her to the bed.
One very pleasant hour later, Nina was cuddling Gato's head against her chest as he lay in a comfortable half-doze. "I think my parents would like you," she commented.
Gato was about to tell her not to mention parents in bed, but then thought better of it. He propped himself on one elbow and asked, "How long has it been since you saw them? They don't live around here, do they?"
Nina grunted. "Have you been talking to my mother when I'm not around? They live in New Amsterdam. I haven't seen them since Christmas of 0078. I'd have have gone home for Christmas in 0079 except for the war."
"You should visit them."
"Will you come with me?"
He was quiet. "Do they know about me yet?"
"I've said I've started dating, but I haven't told them you live with me. They're very protective."
Gato blinked at her, alarmed. "You haven't told them my name, have you?"
"No. I know you're not hiding exactly, but that you want to keep a low profile. But Anavel, I'm going to have to tell some of the girls at work soon. Before you came along, we used to get together for drinks and movies at each others' apartments. They're commenting on what a hermit I've become."
"You should go out, then. I've got Kelly and some of the other guys as company."
"And telling my friends?"
Gato thought about it. "Tell the truth, that it's someone at Anaheim and you can't let them know because we're both afraid for our jobs."
She nodded. "All right." When Gato nestled into the curve of her arm again, Nina continued. "You really miss your folks, don't you?"
"I do, terribly. I want to send them a letter, but I can't imagine how to do it. I'm sure their mail is read. The only thing I can think of is seeing if anyone is going to Side 3 who could hand-carry it. They live in Zum City."
"You want me to go see my parents because you can't see yours, don't you?"
"That's part of it, yes. The other is that I just put a very high value on family and don't like watching them grow apart."
"Then I'll go visit. I'll see if I can have next Friday off and leave Thursday night. Will you be all right without me?"
"I think I'll manage."
Tetley sent the computer cracker by once Gato had confirmed that Nina had left. Nina's briefcase was locked, but Tetley made short work of that with a set of picks. Gato and Kelly sorted through the notes as the cracker worked through the passwords to see the files on her laptop.
"I'm still not getting what this Physalis is for," Kelly said, leafing through the blueprints he was looking at.
"These are still all the plans as they stand," Gato said. "Nice machines."
"Look who's working on them," Kelly said.
"I'm in," said the cracker. Kelly, Gato, and Tetley all gathered around the desk as he began to open files. "Here's the files sent to Nina from Anaheim's Irvine plant. They're the weapons R&D."
There was a collective gasp as the blueprint for the weapon the Physalis carried came on screen.
"I think I'm going to be sick," Gato whispered.
"Those sons of bitches," Kelly added.
"Nuclear arms," Tetley said. "So that's why the Physalis has that radiation proofing. They're planning on using a nuclear warhead against us."
"I'll start printing," said the cracker.
For the next hour, the printer whirred and Tetley snapped digital photos of the plans. Gato sat silently in the living room, drinking beer. Kelly sat by him, equally quiet.
At last, Tetley was done. He and his companion packed up and said, "Excellent work, gentlemen. Lt. Layzner, payment will be wired to your bank account. Lt. Gato, you'll be contacted in the future about re-joining the Delaz fleet."
"When?" he asked.
"I don't know. You'll be contacted." He saluted. "Sieg Jion."
Gato and Kelly returned the salute and Tetley left. Once he was gone, Kelly said, "Gato, you're one lucky bastard. You'll be back in a mobile suit in no time!"
"I certainly hope so. Nuclear weapons. The Federation has gone too far this time." He sat down on the floor and began replacing the blueprints into Nina's briefcase according to notes they had taken on where they had been. "The Feddies must be stopped, and Jion needs me to help stop them. Every fibre of my being is crying out against this outrage. And yet..." his voice trailed off and his eyes settled on the bed he shared with Nina.
"I know, man. I know." Kelly patted him on the shoulder. "I gotta get home to the little woman. I'll call you tomorrow."
Alone again, Gato readied for bed and lay down. It was strange to not have Nina lying beside him. He lay a hand on her side of the bed, then drew her pillow into his arms. He inhaled her scent from it, then replaced it firmly. No. Sleeping alone was something he was going to have to once again be accustomed. No gentle hands on his skin, setting his nerves on fire. No sweet soft body beneath his as they made love. No comforting arms around him when he awakened from bad dreams.
Gato took a sheet and blanket and fell asleep on the couch.
*"Magic" by Jacob Wheeler, the first closing theme song from "Stardust Memory"
Gato frowned. "How do you know I'm not coming home from an early morning walk?"
Laetura picked up Kelly's empty dish and walked it to the sink. "Same clothes from the day before. You haven't shaved today either, and you always shave."
"Nothing gets past you." He went over to the milk crates he used as a dresser and started pulling out clean clothes. "Where's my backpack?"
"In the hall closet," Laetura told him.
"How was Nina?" Kelly asked.
Laetura handed Gato his empty backpack. "I sense a man to man talk coming. I'll go to the store for more cereal." She picked up her purse and left.
"So much for waiting for Mrs. Anavel Gato," Kelly told him.
"Duty called."
"Looks like you're going back for more."
Gato nodded. "I said I'd spend the rest of the weekend with her. I'll be back Monday night. I need some clean clothes, a new toothbrush, that kind of thing."
"You feel like James Bond?" Kelly asked with a grin.
Gato didn't smile back. "I feel like a right bastard."
"Sorry."
Gato sat down beside Kelly. "She's grating. She's moody. She's high- maintenance and clingy. She panicked this morning when she found I wasn't still in bed because I was up making her breakfast. On the surface, Nina's not the sort of woman I'd choose as my lover in a million years. There could be other ways to get at her secrets."
"So what changed your mind?"
Gato's expression softened. "She arranged for me to take out a Zaku."
"What? You're kidding."
"No. Last night, we went out for a ride. I couldn't believe it. It almost made me feel human again."
"Like a whole person," Kelly mumbled.
"Exactly. Like a--" Gato cut himself off. "Forgive me, my friend. That was insensitive of me."
"It's all right. I'm doing fine."
"Despite all her shortcomings, Nina's just given me the gift of dignity which I've missed these past few months. Otherwise I'd have just kept stringing her along with dinner and little presents until the time when I could conveniently dope her and get into her briefcase. But now, this is serious. To complete my mission, I'm going to have to be a cad."
"You know, I always looked forward to the day you'd come home with JBF hair and I'd be able to give you hell over it. Gato, your sense of honour has ruined even that. Good thing I never took you to a whorehouse; you'd insist on writing thank you notes and sending flowers the next day."
"Probably. That's how I was raised, and it'd be a better world if we all functioned that way, thank you."
There was one last thing to do. Gato met Tetley in a park a mile or so from Anaheim. Tetley looked up from feeding the ducks and said, "You're late."
"I know, but you won't mind the reason," Gato said. "I have entry to Nina Purpleton's apartment now."
"Really? Excellent. Is this just a one time thing, or likely to go on for a while?"
"I'm on my way back there now."
Tetley took some money out of his pocket. "Take her out to dinner."
Nina met him at the door of her apartment. She was dressed again and flung her arms around his neck. "You're back. I was starting to worry, after what you told me your neighbourhood was like."
"I forgot that I had some laundry to do."
Nina grinned. "Handsome, smart, polite, and tidy too! You are a keeper, aren't you?"
Nina awakened late Sunday night to the sound of Anavel whimpering in his sleep. He was turned on his side away from her, tossing his head against the pillow. Nina sat up and lay a careful hand on his shoulder. "Anavel," she said softly. "Anavel?"
On the third repetition of his name he came to. "Where am I?"
"You're in my apartment. You're safe."
Gato rolled onto his back and brushed his loosened hair from his forehead. He reached for Nina and pulled her against his chest.
"Were you dreaming about the war?" she asked.
"Kind of. It was just a nightmare, you know they never make sense." His arms tightened around her and Nina squeezed back comfortingly. She knew he wasn't telling her the truth, but reasoned that if he wanted to tell her about his dream, he would.
Nina was correct. Gato figured she didn't need to know the details, that he'd been commanding a ship where the crew were all missing body parts. There had been no blood, and the soldiers seemed completely at ease despite going without arms, legs, and in some cases even heads. He was wondering what had brought him to such a macabre command when he'd looked down and noticed that somewhere along the line, he'd lost both his legs.
He lay awake for most of the night, listening to Nina's soft breathing and occasional little snore until he drowsed off again near dawn.
As they were getting ready for work, Nina said, "You know, I don't think we should tell anybody about us."
"Why not?"
"Anaheim's got some really old-fashioned attitudes about their employees' personal lives. I know we don't really work together, but it's probably better if we don't let on that...that..."
"We've become lovers," Gato said, finishing the thought for her.
"Yeah. Exactly."
"I agree. If only because I don't think I could handle all the giggles from your co-workers every time I came in to deliver the mail."
She laughed. "That would be pretty bad, wouldn't it? Okay. It's our secret."
"Our secret." They linked little fingers and kissed to close the deal.
"You look unusually mellow today," Gato's supervisor commented when he came in.
Gato started investigating Nina's personal library the next Saturday while she was in the shower. She kept professional journals and composition books filled with notes on the shelves. In a recent journal he found passages underlined about making armour lightweight but resistant against radiation. Paragraphs were marked with exclamation points and comments such as, "Suggest to Dr. Vane". He tucked two of them into his backpack just as he heard the water stop running and returned them to the shelves the next weekend. If Nina noticed, she never said anything.
"Nuclear resistant armour. Advances on the vernians," Tetley recited to himself as he and Gato walked in the park. "Have you found anything yet on the armaments these Gundams will carry?"
"No. That's a different Research and Development section altogether. If only we knew the reason they needed all this protection against radiation."
"To make them immune against being hit in the reactor?"
"Then why have it all on the suit's limbs, and that heavy?" Gato crossed his arms. "If only I had a reason to be alone in her apartment. I must get into her laptop. I'll have to see if I can talk her into giving me a key."
Tetley patted him on the shoulder. "Do your best."
Later that week, another canvas trolley of paper was rolled over to Gato's shredder. Recently the well had run dry as far as anything new came along and it was getting harder and harder to hold his concentration as he shuffled through pounds and pounds of paper before loading it into the shredder. He took a few mouthfuls of coffee to stay alert, fastened his hair back more securely, and turned the machine on.
Junk, junk, junk, junk. Hm, Paula's birthday was coming up. Crap, that meant he'd have to go with Nina to buy her a present. Junk, junk, junk--
"Hello, what's this?" he murmured to himself as he pulled out a computer- generated sketch. Gato glanced around quickly then studied the image. On normal letter-sized paper, it was a line drawing of the Physalis. On it was written the note: "Yes, it's only going to be 83 tons. This is not a joke. NP."
In another hand was an arrow pointing to the arms with a note back saying, "Not with a cooling system like this it's not. Back to the drawing board with you. Dr. Vane."
Gato folded the sheet quickly and slipped it into his pocket. It must have been a mistake that the sketch got as far as the mailroom because nothing else like it materialized.
When Gato came home that night, Laetura and Kelly were waiting for him with a bottle of sparkling non-alcoholic cider. Laetura popped it as soon as he came in.
"Um, what's the occasion?"
Kelly took the bottle from her and poured. "Tetley was over. For the rest of my pension, they went ahead and bought us a scrapyard."
"It's got a house on it!" Laetura exclaimed in delight. "I can have a garden, and there's space for a baby's room and everything."
Gato caught the look of fear that appeared in Kelly's eyes but said nothing. Obviously the two were going to have to discuss a few things. "When are we moving?"
"Laetura and I will move in a couple of weeks, after we close. You move as soon as you can find yourself a place."
"Find myself a place?"
"You've got a job," Kelly reminded him.
"There's a 0.4 vacancy rate, Kelly, and my income is a joke!"
"Look, I wish we could do something else, but Laetura and I have decided to get married, and it'd just be too weird to have you still living with us. Plus it's out of commuting range from Anaheim."
Gato sipped at his cider and winced. It tasted sulphuric. "So when's the wedding?"
"We'll do that before we move in," Laetura said. "Bring along your girlfriend. We want to meet her, and this way she'll see us as we're starting off on a new life together." She took Kelly's hand and smiled up at him.
The next day, Gato wrote a note and slid it into an inter-office envelope. He delivered it to Nina along with the rest of her mail. When he came through that afternoon with the second delivery, she handed it back to him.
Neither of them noticed Lucette, who had caught Gato's handwriting over Nina's shoulder.
Gato appeared at Nina's door that evening. They sat down on the couch and she asked, "Why are your roommates kicking you out?"
"They're getting married and they bought themselves a house."
"That's a good reason."
"What am I going to do?"
"Why don't you live with me?"
Gato looked down at her, seeing Tetley's behind-the-scenes manoevers slide neatly into place. "You mean that?"
"Why not? You spend three nights a week here. You keep your clothes and a spare toothbrush here. It wouldn't be that much of a change." Nina linked arms with him. "Anavel, you shouldn't have worried. I would never let you go back to the street. I couldn't ever do that because I love you."
He gazed down incoherently. "You do?"
"Yes!" She hugged him tightly. "You're the first man ever to really understand why mobile suits are my passion. The guys I've dated before just thought it was a funny thing for a girl to be doing and kept me around for my looks. When they realized I was more than just a cute blonde with a knack for machinery, it was over. I don't have to worry about that with you. Plus, you've trusted me with your secrets. Of course I love you."
"Oh." Gato struggled with what to say next. "Nina. You're so good to me."
"I don't imagine you have much."
"No, I don't."
She smiled and squeezed his arm with both of hers. "Well why don't you go get it? I'll spring for a taxi for you to bring it all back over here. No use staying where you're not wanted!"
It was early evening. Laetura was still at work and Kelly was gone too. Gato hung up his jacket and went into the closet for the dufflebag he'd been carrying when they first moved to Laetura's.
It wasn't quite empty. Since he was alone, he decided to allow himself one private moment with his past.
In the bottom of the bag was a flat plastic box. He brought it out and opened it up. Neatly folded inside was his dark green uniform with the tunic on top. The epaulets were tucked into plastic bags of their own at the corners, the belt at the bottom. He reached in and stroked the crisp gabardine of the tunic, the velvet of the cape and panels with their heavy gold embroidery. He remembered the day he'd first put on one of these uniforms as a green ensign straight out of the Academy. That had been 21 years of ambition and dreams achieved.
He lifted the tunic out of the box and held it folded on his lap. At least he had his. Kelly's uniform was lost. After being pulled mangled and bleeding from his wounded mobile suit he'd never had the chance to retrieve it. Gato's habit was to always carry a spare uniform with him, allowing one to survive the destruction of the Doroa and the taking of A Bao A Qu.
The door opened and Gato jumped. It was Kelly, who looked at the uniform in Gato's hands and said, "Sorry, I didn't realize you needed some privacy. I thought you were just jacking off or something."
"I might as well be." Gato put the tunic back in its box. "I take that back. If I were fapping, it would have the useful side effect of leaving me relaxed." He clicked the lid shut.
Kelly lifted a corner of the rug and picked up a loose floorboard. He pulled out a bottle of bourbon and held it between his knees to uncap it. He held it out to Gato. "You look like you need this. What's going on?"
"Nina's come to my rescue by offering to let me live with her."
"Y'know, most guys would be happy about that." Kelly raised a hand before Gato could say a word. "I know, I know. You feel like you're taking advantage of her so you can get mobile suit secrets. Well, you're not. Here's what you do. You move in, you bring her flowers every week, you do your share of the housework-very important-and you bang her every night. What more could she ask for?"
"Honesty," Gato said.
Kelly grinned. "She really has gotten to you, hasn't she? Think of it this way, pal. Don't you want Nina to live in a world ruled by Jion? Wouldn't she be better off? You said she lives in a crappy one-room apartment. Back home she'd be given a house, paid more, treated like the genius she is. You're not betraying her, Gato, you're getting her recognition."
Gato considered this for a moment, then smiled. "Of course, Kelly. I hadn't thought of it that way. She is treated shabbily by Anaheim."
"Damn straight she is. So go back in there, tiger, and find out what's going on in that woman's scary little brain."
"Why do you say her brain is scary?"
"Cause she's a woman."
"Then, what are our brains?"
Kelly smiled. "Too slow to be afraid."
Gato opened the door to find Nina standing by a table set for two. She was lighting some candles. "I called for delivery food," she explained. "I wanted your first night home to be special. You can go put away your clothes in the meantime."
He went over to the sleeping area. They had long ago moved the bed so that they could both get out of it easily. He sat on his side of the bed to unzip his duffle and looked up.
On the wall facing him, she'd hung a Jion flag. Gato blinked at it as a tangled mire of emotion filled his heart. Nina sat down on the bed beside him.
"I didn't know how you'd feel about that. If you're offended, you can take it down."
"No. I'm feeling many things on seeing my country's flag, but offended is most definitely not one of them. It's a very welcoming gesture indeed." He put his arms around Nina and kissed her.
###
Kelly's and Laetura's wedding was a quiet affair in a registry office with only Gato and Nina as witnesses. Gato and Kelly had spent Kelly's last night as a free man camping in the empty apartment as Laetura put the finishing touches on the house. The party for a few friends was thus both a housewarming and a wedding party.
Nina admired Laetura's creativity. "Wow," she said, "You've done a lot in here with..."
"Go ahead and say it," Laetura said. "With next to nothing. And I'm real proud of that. Just over a year ago, I was a junkie on welfare. Now I own a house and do the books for my husband's business. And not just any old joe, I landed me a dang Jion officer! Whoohoo!" She held up her soft drink in a toast to herself.
"You've got a lot to be proud of," Miriam said. To Nina she explained, "Laetura waitressed for pay at the Kitchen, but between meals, she was learning book-keeping. She's very good at it, too."
"I think we'll do fine," Laetura said. "Maybe not rich, but that's okay. Kelly's already been fiddling with some stuff this creepy woman brought by for him to fix."
"Creepy how?" Nina asked.
Laetura frowned. "Hard to say. Real tall, long black hair, Jion accent. There was something wrong about her though. Like I said, creepy. But she gave him money up front. Still," Laetura shook her head, "I hope nothing happens about that. It felt like trouble."
Nina laughed. "Jions are always trouble. They show up in our lives and next thing we know, they're sleeping beside us."
Laetura snorted. "I don't want this one sleeping beside me! All I want is Kelly, and he just swore to want me, and only me. So there."
"Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god," swore Kelly into his one remaining hand. He pulled it away from his face and stared in terror at his wedding ring. "Gato, what did I just do?"
Gato was leaning against the wall of the warehouse, arms crossed, glowering at his friend. "Looked to me like you got married."
"Aargh. Why did I do that?"
Gato glared. "I was under the impression that you loved the woman."
"I do. This is just so...final."
"You're being stupid. I know I didn't approve of Laetura at first. I've changed my opinion of her because I've seen how devoted she is to you. When she looks at you, she doesn't see a crippled Jion soldier. She sees what I see, a proud officer who was honourably wounded while courageously fighting for our freedom. There's nothing wrong with being retired and starting a new life with a good woman."
"No, there isn't. Except another possibility just came up." Kelly walked over to a cloth-draped object the size of two large cars and pulled the cloth away. Gato gasped.
"That's a cockpit!"
"Yes. It's for a mobile armour. I've been given the money to start repairing it, for the war effort."
"For the Delaz fleet?"
Kelly nodded.
"Tetley brought this by?"
"No, I didn't," Tetley's voice said from the doorway. Gato and Kelly both jumped. Tetley was dressed in civilian clothes and carrying a shopping bag. "Cima Garahau did. I'm not Delaz's only subordinate, you know."
"Cima Garahau?" Gato said. "The Butcher of Iffish?"
"Yes, well Delaz doesn't see it that way," said Tetley. "I've worked with her myself and I will confess that I don't either. Lt. Layzner, congratulations on your marriage. I brought by some gifts for the new house. I hope your bride doesn't already have a food processor?"
"She doesn't, and she'll be thrilled," Kelly said. "We should all go inside."
"Not yet," Tetley said, closing the door of the warehouse. "Lt. Gato, now that you're living with Nina Purpleton, do you think you can convince her to go somewhere without you? To visit family, friends, a trip with girlfriends?"
"I don't know. Probably."
"When you do, let me know. This is my pager number." He handed Gato a card with it. "Don't call me for any other reason. I'll send a computer cracker over and you, he, and Layzner can make a day of getting to the bottom of this Physalis mystery."
Gato nodded. "It'll be my pleasure."
"Now let's get inside or your ladies will get suspicious." Tetley slid the door back open and they returned to the house.
###
"Whenever I go to a wedding, I always wish I had a magic crystal ball to see how it all ends," Nina said when she and Gato had returned home. "Kelly and Laetura are kind of a weird couple, but I like them. They're both really strong people. They've come through a lot. I admire that."
Gato pulled off his tie and hung it up neatly. He heard Nina turn on the radio and go into the bathroom. He changed from his dress clothes into a t- shirt and jeans and sat down on the bed, waiting for her to emerge. Nina came out wearing a worn cotton dress she liked. She sat down across Gato's lap and hugged him.
"Do you think we could be that happy together someday?" she asked.
Not wanting to lie, Gato told her, "We can hope, can't we?"
"I know I do," Nina said.
The song changed and Gato helped Nina off his lap. She started to protest, but stopped when he took her into his arms and started slow-dancing with her.
"You mean you like this kind of song?" she asked.
"Hush," Gato told her.
Don't come to me, just cause you're lonely tonight/Lonely's only part of your game/Long as you live, you must remember one thing/Give and take are one and the same
So tell me are you ready, really, really ready/Cause I don't want your love for one night.
Nina raised her eyes to Gato's. He was smiling at her gently.
Cause I'm not looking for a love affair/I need the magic when I hold you near/It's more important than a one night stand/I need the magic when I touch your hand.*
Nina reached up and undid his hair. It fell forward and covered both their faces as they kissed. Gato followed that with little nibbles on her cheek and ear which made Nina giggle softly until he lifted her in his arms and carried her to the bed.
One very pleasant hour later, Nina was cuddling Gato's head against her chest as he lay in a comfortable half-doze. "I think my parents would like you," she commented.
Gato was about to tell her not to mention parents in bed, but then thought better of it. He propped himself on one elbow and asked, "How long has it been since you saw them? They don't live around here, do they?"
Nina grunted. "Have you been talking to my mother when I'm not around? They live in New Amsterdam. I haven't seen them since Christmas of 0078. I'd have have gone home for Christmas in 0079 except for the war."
"You should visit them."
"Will you come with me?"
He was quiet. "Do they know about me yet?"
"I've said I've started dating, but I haven't told them you live with me. They're very protective."
Gato blinked at her, alarmed. "You haven't told them my name, have you?"
"No. I know you're not hiding exactly, but that you want to keep a low profile. But Anavel, I'm going to have to tell some of the girls at work soon. Before you came along, we used to get together for drinks and movies at each others' apartments. They're commenting on what a hermit I've become."
"You should go out, then. I've got Kelly and some of the other guys as company."
"And telling my friends?"
Gato thought about it. "Tell the truth, that it's someone at Anaheim and you can't let them know because we're both afraid for our jobs."
She nodded. "All right." When Gato nestled into the curve of her arm again, Nina continued. "You really miss your folks, don't you?"
"I do, terribly. I want to send them a letter, but I can't imagine how to do it. I'm sure their mail is read. The only thing I can think of is seeing if anyone is going to Side 3 who could hand-carry it. They live in Zum City."
"You want me to go see my parents because you can't see yours, don't you?"
"That's part of it, yes. The other is that I just put a very high value on family and don't like watching them grow apart."
"Then I'll go visit. I'll see if I can have next Friday off and leave Thursday night. Will you be all right without me?"
"I think I'll manage."
Tetley sent the computer cracker by once Gato had confirmed that Nina had left. Nina's briefcase was locked, but Tetley made short work of that with a set of picks. Gato and Kelly sorted through the notes as the cracker worked through the passwords to see the files on her laptop.
"I'm still not getting what this Physalis is for," Kelly said, leafing through the blueprints he was looking at.
"These are still all the plans as they stand," Gato said. "Nice machines."
"Look who's working on them," Kelly said.
"I'm in," said the cracker. Kelly, Gato, and Tetley all gathered around the desk as he began to open files. "Here's the files sent to Nina from Anaheim's Irvine plant. They're the weapons R&D."
There was a collective gasp as the blueprint for the weapon the Physalis carried came on screen.
"I think I'm going to be sick," Gato whispered.
"Those sons of bitches," Kelly added.
"Nuclear arms," Tetley said. "So that's why the Physalis has that radiation proofing. They're planning on using a nuclear warhead against us."
"I'll start printing," said the cracker.
For the next hour, the printer whirred and Tetley snapped digital photos of the plans. Gato sat silently in the living room, drinking beer. Kelly sat by him, equally quiet.
At last, Tetley was done. He and his companion packed up and said, "Excellent work, gentlemen. Lt. Layzner, payment will be wired to your bank account. Lt. Gato, you'll be contacted in the future about re-joining the Delaz fleet."
"When?" he asked.
"I don't know. You'll be contacted." He saluted. "Sieg Jion."
Gato and Kelly returned the salute and Tetley left. Once he was gone, Kelly said, "Gato, you're one lucky bastard. You'll be back in a mobile suit in no time!"
"I certainly hope so. Nuclear weapons. The Federation has gone too far this time." He sat down on the floor and began replacing the blueprints into Nina's briefcase according to notes they had taken on where they had been. "The Feddies must be stopped, and Jion needs me to help stop them. Every fibre of my being is crying out against this outrage. And yet..." his voice trailed off and his eyes settled on the bed he shared with Nina.
"I know, man. I know." Kelly patted him on the shoulder. "I gotta get home to the little woman. I'll call you tomorrow."
Alone again, Gato readied for bed and lay down. It was strange to not have Nina lying beside him. He lay a hand on her side of the bed, then drew her pillow into his arms. He inhaled her scent from it, then replaced it firmly. No. Sleeping alone was something he was going to have to once again be accustomed. No gentle hands on his skin, setting his nerves on fire. No sweet soft body beneath his as they made love. No comforting arms around him when he awakened from bad dreams.
Gato took a sheet and blanket and fell asleep on the couch.
*"Magic" by Jacob Wheeler, the first closing theme song from "Stardust Memory"