The remaining two days were…well, they could be better.
First off, the fact that Hikigaya-kun wasn't here meant that I had to sleep all by my lonesome. My adorable dead-fish-eyed hug pillow was thousands of kilometers away while I had to make do with an inanimate, clearly inferior pillow.
The weather didn't get any better either; for my entire remaining two days, all it did was rain, rain, and rain. Nonstop. It was like the sky was reflecting my mood overall.
Said mood was dampened even further by the utterly useless meetings that I was forced to sit in. Despite having teams from multiple regions coming in, we couldn't come to an agreement at all regarding this new campaign that I've kickstarted. One side wanted this, the other wanted that, and all I wanted was to get out of this god forsaken country!
But because of that, I had to miss my nightly calls with Hikigaya-kun, able to only shoot him a LINE message or two on the occasion that I was free – which was very little, mind you. He, of course, understood this and simply told me to not work too hard or stay up too late.
Too bad he wasn't here to stop me.
For the final day's meetings, I was basically operating on autopilot, having spent the previous night preparing the presentation deck with my assistant just so we could get this whole shebang over and done with. I was sure poor little Hokori was exhausted out of her mind, if her occasionally nodding off was any indication, but the little trooper was a genuine helper, dealing with the smaller details while I worked over the big picture.
We had to get across town to the meeting place while it was raining (Obviously, the gods hate me) all while chugging cups upon cups of espresso in a desperate bid to wake ourselves up. Did it work? Who knows. Did our presentation finally put an end to the endless debates being had by each of the regional leads? Yes. Thank god, it did.
And that meant one thing as the meeting was adjourned on a good note and all of us finally got out (Read: Escaped); I finally get to go home.
And you can bet your bottom yen that I did not waste even a single second in doing so as I immediately went back to the hotel and packed my things up before traveling straight to the airport. Even though my body was screaming for me to at least rest another day here then return home tomorrow, I elected to ignore it just because I wanted to get back home so much and most importantly, to the person living in said home.
So, I gritted my teeth, planted my feet, and chugged an even unhealthier amount of espresso in order to catch the next available flight. And once again, thank god for Hokori because without that wonderful girl, I wouldn't have been able to book that flight in the first place. She was still staying in London for a few more days yet she still took the time out of her day to help me out!
Honestly, when I see her again, she'll definitely get a raise.
Of course, the flight being booked on such short notice meant that I couldn't get a business class seat but that didn't matter too much. The amenities were more than enough to keep me occupied while the caffeine coursing through my veins worked overtime to keep me alert. Maybe a little bit too alert because I was feeling just a tad bit lightheaded but it wasn't much to worry about. Just needed some food in my stomach.
The 12 hours that it took to fly back was honestly a bit of a blur and by the time I landed back in Tokyo, nighttime had already greeted the Tokyo skyline. I had half a mind to call my wonderful roommate to pick me up but considering the fact that it was half past 11 PM and that he was visiting his family back in Chiba, it'd be a hassle. Besides, I would be able to surprise him this way.
So, once again, I gritted my teeth and hailed a cab, ignoring the weird, heated sensation in my head.
Said sensation didn't stop at all even as I was able to take the precious minutes to rest up in the cab and just focus on getting back my energy. In fact, I think it got worse. Was it something I ate or perhaps just because of jetlag? Though I was pretty sure jetlag wouldn't have made my eyes blurry and my head this hot.
It was eerily quiet by the time I got back to our apartment. Only a few lights still emanated through the windows of the complex. With a deep breath, I tried to steady myself as much as possible as I dragged my luggage along with me. Though it felt as if with each meter, it was getting harder and harder to do so. Did I buy that much souvenirs? Or maybe the caffeine finally lost its effects on me and I was going to crash at any moment?
Didn't matter.
I got to our apartment's door. And with a swipe, I was back in. Home sweet home.
The lights were already on. Which made me think if Hikigaya-kun forgot to turn it off when he left to visit his family? Could be…I'll just give him an earful when he gets back, complete with a monologue about environmentalism and all those wonderful jargons.
But for now…
My body was screaming me to get to nearest softest surface, which mean the couch. I didn't really care that I was still in my work attire nor the fact that this pencil skirt that I was wearing felt extremely restricting and could tear if I wasn't being careful.
But again, didn't care.
Not at all.
All I cared about was resting. Just sitting down and letting my eyes droop and fall to its natural position. Maybe sleep even. But as I left my luggage by the doorway, I could hear some voice call out to me. Did I miss Hikigaya-kun that much that I began hallucinating his voice or perhaps it was a ghost? Hell, even if a ghost appeared right then and there, I would be too tired to get scared.
Though the couch in front of me felt like it was further and further away with every step…
Ugh, why was I feeling so heated? Did someone turn up the heater?
Not only that but…my arms felt heavier. So did my legs. My vision got blurrier the closer I got to my resting spot. I squinted and tried to shake the dizziness away to no avail. Maybe…I should just…lay on the floor to rest a bit…
Or at least, that was my last thought before all I could see was black.
...
...
...
I always found it annoying to wake up.
Whether it'd be from an alarm clock or the sun hitting my eyes, waking up in general is just annoying.
However, for this one time only, I found that waking up has certain merits to it.
"Sup."
The sunlight behind him served almost as a backdrop to the holy presence that he was giving off, as if Hikigaya-kun was going to provide us salvations.
"…hi…" I barely squeaked out, finding that my throat felt coarse and rough like sandpaper.
"Here," he handed me a bottle of water, helping me up by cradling my head before allowing me to take my time drinking it. Boy was that the greatest drink I've ever had. I felt like a shriveled up, desiccated cactus in the desert that has finally received a welcome dose of rainfall.
But wait…
"…why am I here…?" I looked around myself drearily, seeing the fluffy blankets and pillows surrounding me as I was situated on our bed while Hikigaya-kun was seated on a nearby chair, "I thought I…"
"Passed out? Yeah, yeah, you did. Gave me quite a scare too."
I looked at Hikigaya-kun quizzically, raising my eyebrows as the gears in my head whirred round and round, stuck in a constant loop of asking myself the same question over and over.
"…you were home the whole time?"
In response, he gave me an equally quizzical eyebrow raise, "Should I not be at my own home?"
"T-That's not what I mean…" I pouted, finding a small amount of strength to cross my arms, "…I thought you were in Chiba."
"I was, but it's for my dad's birthday. I wasn't going to stay there for more than an evening."
"You could've told meeeeeeee…"
"I did," he replied with an amused huff, "But I suspected that you were too busy to even read your LINE messages, huh?"
"Oh…"
Again, the whirlwind of questions began pouring in again. Howling incessantly about all the things that I want to know yet couldn't form a coherent thought about.
However, I managed to compose myself enough to ask one more question, "…so I passed out…"
"Yes, you did," my roommate helpfully clarified, bringing something behind him to my face. It was a bowl of porridge, "Here, eat up. Not as good as my pancakes but I got the recipe from my mom so it should still be good."
He even blew on a spoonful of it for me. How husband-material of him.
"Wait wait, don't distract me…" I whined, much to his amusement. Massaging my temple, I laid back on the bed, "So…actually, when did I pass out again..."
"Give or take, 1 am."
"Right…and what time is it now?"
"About 6:45 am. Don't worry, I called your company to let them know that you're taking a sick leave today."
"Uh huh…" I nodded slowly, peering at Hikigaya-kun's state of dress along with the state of our bed. Clearly only one side was used and that was the one I was sitting on. Even the couch didn't seem like it'd seen any use.
Which only meant one thing…
"Hikigayaya-kun."
"You stuttered."
"Did nooooooot," I whined again, playfully hitting his shoulders, "I just…wait let me get this straight again…"
"Go ahead."
"So, I passed out at like midnight…"
"1 am," Hikigaya-kun helpfully corrected me again.
"…and you found me at that time?"
"Indeed, I did."
"And you…took care of me till morning?"
"I thought that much was obvious, but yes."
"…jeez, Hikigayaya-kuuuuun!" I whined and pouted again, hitting his chest as hard as I could in anger.
But all he did was laugh in response as if my blows meant nothing to him at all! How rude!
"What's this all about, Haruno?"
"You didn't sleeeeeep!"
How dare he ruin his sleep schedule over me?!
"Well, I dozed off a few times but someone has to take care of you."
"Haaaaah? But you didn't sleeeeeep…" I cried out again, suddenly feeling guilty that he had to take the time and effort to make sure I didn't get worse, "And after all that time you told me to sleep early…you hypocrite! Hypocrit-ya-kun!"
Again, all he did was laugh at my incredibly serious and angry reprimands, which just made me even angrier as a result.
"Come on, it was only for one night."
"Still…you didn't have to do it, y'know…" My energy finally ran out as I sank back into the bed, staring at the ceiling while trying to understand why he didn't just sleep through the night after tucking me in. Ugh, what an annoying man, instilling this sensation of guilt into my beautiful brain.
"If your immune system was stronger then perhaps, I wouldn't have."
"…ugggggh…" I grumbled and groaned in pain and guilt, sinking deeper into the mattress as Hikigaya-kun tried to feed me another spoonful of porridge, "…being back home even though your family is celebrating a birthday…taking care of me through the night…and even thinking about my work for me…"
Turning to him, I almost couldn't bear to look Hikigaya-kun in the eyes because of all the troubles I caused for him.
"…you didn't have to do that, y'know…" I added, feeling more guilt-stricken than ever.
Hikigaya-kun simply chuckled before bringing a comforting hand to the top of my head, patting it softly before replying.
"I know, but hey, that's what being a boyfriend is about, right?"
"…."
…
…
I was staring at the ceiling.
Eyes glazed over while seeming like only one brain cell was active in my head.
As if there were nothing going on up there at all.
But it couldn't be further from the truth. My brain was going into overdrive as my ears captured his voice and fed it directly into my central nervous system. It analyzed the words he said…and again…and again and again; over and over till I got sick of it.
Which I never did.
Because Hikigaya-kun just…
He just said…
"Mmmph!"
With a quick snap, I pulled the blanket up to my face, covering it from the man who was supposed to feed me porridge and keep my temperature from going up. But now, he was doing the exact opposite, making me even more feverish than ever before!
The nerve!
"Haruno, I can't feed you with a blanket covering you."
As a response, I pulled it back down while using my forearms to cover the upper parts of my face.
"Aaaaaaaaah."
I opened my mouth.
He laughed again.
"You're so childish."
I pouted. Which might've proved him right but I didn't care.
"Don't care. I'm cute."
"Yes, yes you are."
See?! Even he agreed with me.
"Cutest in the world," I added.
"You might have to contend with Komachi on that one."
"Cutest in the world," I repeated with much needed emphasis this time while pouting even harder, which I knew he could see because my heated cheeks were out in the open – no thanks to him!
"Yes, yes, Yukinoshita Haruno is indeed the cutest in the world," Hikigaya-kun agreed with an amused tone, "Now will this cutest in the world eat her porridge?"
"Aaaaaaaaaaah."
And being the gentleman that he is, Hikigaya-kun blew on my spoonful of porridge again before gently feeding it to me.
I, being the cutest in the world, greedily consumed anything that he fed me.
It was the best bowl of porridge I ever had in my life.
After that sort of flag-raising event, you would've expected us to finally come clean with our feelings about each other, which would then open the gateways for even more emotional catharsis, right?
Bzzzzt! Wrong.
Well, if Hikigaya-kun and I were any normal couple, then sure. We would definitely do that. Most likely be on the floor, holding each other's hands and looking into each other's eyes then confessing our long-suppressed feeling.
Probably followed by a marriage proposal.
But again, I'm not that kind of woman.
Hikigaya-kun is not that kind of man.
Our love language was different. A lot more subtle and a lot less verbally affectionate. We didn't say anything about the things that Hikigaya-kun told me, precisely because we didn't need to. I was comfortable with the silence and so was he. Because we both know where we stand in regards to each other.
It has been about a month ever since that horrible (Yet fruitful) fever, and we never so much as brought up about the incident. Complete and utter silence from both of us.
And boy, what a comforting silence it was.
"Hey, Haruno."
My boyfriend – yes, I could finally say it without shame now – spoke up one day as I laid on his chest while he laid on the couch. He was playing some random game on his Switch while I mindlessly browsed through my phone. It was a lazy Thursday night after all; we both deserved the rest.
"Yes, my lovey dovey darling?"
"I swear, you're just getting more obnoxious by the day."
"Yet you still love lil old me."
"That I do," Hikigaya-kun admitted, even giving me a small hug as he did so.
"Ehe~"
"So anyways, I was just wondering if you were free tomorrow; that's all."
The way Hikigaya-kun said that so casually would make someone think that he was simply asking me out on a date. Which would be weird, considering how long we are together. But then again, tomorrow wasn't just any normal day. Far from it in fact.
What day was it, you might ask?
Well, simply put, it was the day that god himself decided to grace this wonderful world with a creation that far surpasses any of his other creations.
July 7th.
In other words, my birthday~
"Oh, I don't know," I feigned innocence, scrolling on my phone to seem more authentic, "Depends on what you want to do tomorrow. It is a Friday after all."
Of course, that was a tiny white lie. I'd already filed for a leave tomorrow afternoon so it didn't matter what Hikigaya-kun wanted to do because I'd be down for it.
Speaking of which, I wonder what he got in store for me. In contrast to his aloof demeanor, Hikigaya-kun is an extremely thoughtful person. Throughout the years that we were together, he has never forgotten my birthday – not even once – which was a bit annoying considering that one time I forgot his but details, details, details.
He would ask me out just like this, then either pick me up from my work or we go straight to a fancy restaurant that he booked, have a wonderful meal (Financed by Hikigaya-kun, obviously), drive around in the Tokyo nighttime then return home where he would proceed to completely and utterly mess me up.
Three years and counting, and that last part is always my favorite.
"Are you for real?"
"For real."
I could hear a sigh from behind me. He was probably rubbing his forehead or something, muttering something about how wonderful of a woman I am.
"You know that I know already, Haruno," he clarified, putting his phone down before hugging me tightly, "So when do you want me to pick you up?"
"I mean, if you put it like that then," I leaned back into his embrace even more, enjoying the warmth his chest had against my head, "I suppose you can pick me up after lunch at my workplace. 1 PM sounds good?"
"Sounds great then."
"I want steak for tomorrow by the way. And lobster," I put a finger on my chin after saying that, trying to think up of any cravings that I still had, "Oh and vanilla gelato for dessert."
"Way ahead of you," Hikigaya-kun chuckled, "Seriously, you're too predictable."
"How rude," I pouted, "I'm just trying to be nice and predictable for my wonderful boyfriend and this is how I get repaid."
"Alright, alright, my bad."
He smooched the top of my head.
Frustratingly enough, it always calms me down.
"There; better?"
"Marginally," I huffed in faux-annoyance.
"Great. Now what should we do for dinner?"
"I'm not getting up. Too comfy sitting on my Hiki-chair-ya-kun."
"That was a horrible pun."
"Point still stands," I retorted, throwing my head back into him.
"I ain't getting up either because of you so…takeout?"
"Takeout it is then."
Our casual and calm conversations might seem to indicate that tomorrow's birthday date would just be another one of our hangouts but that couldn't be further from the truth. In fact, that night, I could barely sleep at all. Tossing and turning, I couldn't help but imagine what sorts of cute ways Hikigaya-kun would present me my cake or pamper me.
Hell, even the morning after, when I was at work, I could barely concentrate, humming a merry tune to myself as I mindlessly signed papers and attended meetings with my subordinates. Thankfully, the meetings were short and since we'd just finished that big international campaign, things have settled down just enough that I didn't have to pay too much attention to my work.
Which meant that I could spend the morning daydreaming about all the wonderful things that Hikigaya-kun had planned.
The clock finally hit 1 PM and right on schedule, Hikigaya-kun was already waiting in front of my office building with his car. He greeted me with that stoic yet handsome smile of his and I returned an equally beautiful one in kind.
"You look extra beautiful today, by the way," he remarked offhandedly, making my ego swell even further.
Well, he said that the past years too but still!
We talked, we laughed, and we definitely flirted all the way to the restaurant – a high class French one, which we were appropriately dressed for (Hikigaya-kun looked super sharp in a suit by the way). As promised, he ordered steak and lobster for my main course, followed by vanilla gelato.
Great food, great atmosphere, and great company.
And hopefully, by the end, I'd get some great pounding too.
Hikigaya-kun groaned when I whispered that to him, but I think underneath that cool exterior was an equally hungry beast.
Win-win, am I right?
As we left the restaurant and began driving again, I wondered where the cake was. That was definitely something that I looked forward too but hey, the steak and lobster dinner was more than enough satisfy me. However, a few minutes passed by and I realized that we weren't heading home yet.
"Do you have one more place in mind?"
I turned to my adorably handsome boyfriend and asked innocently.
"Something like that," he simply smirked as I was left to wonder what he got left in store for us. Well, maybe it was to buy a cake but that was unlikely. He'd already prepared if that was the case.
But I just shrugged and went along with it. Anything that he planned was bound to be enjoyable after all.
And surely enough, when we arrived at our destination, I had to give props to his creativity.
"A planetarium…huh?" I muttered as we got out of the car and I stared at the dome of the Shibuya Cultural Center Owada, or rather, more specifically at the giant silver dome at the top of the building.
"And your guess would be correct," Hikigaya-kun came up behind me, adorning me with his jacket so I wouldn't be cold, "Well, come on now."
I was trying to wrap my head around how Hikigaya-kun even got access to such a place. If I remembered correctly, shouldn't the place be closed by now?
"I'm just calling in a favor from a friend," he told me as I asked that, almost too casually, "What? I have some connections."
"Well, no, I'm just surprised that you would go to such length for a birthday date."
In response, he merely smiled, "I can be sweet sometimes."
Before offering up his arm for me to grab onto, which I gleefully obliged, intertwining my fingers with Hikigaya-kun's.
"Why a planetarium by the way?" I brought up as we ascended the stairs.
"I just thought it'd be neat," his answer didn't sound too convincing, "Besides, you seem like the kind of person to enjoy this more than, let's say, an aquarium, no?"
"Fair point," I concurred with him before realizing that he might be doing this because if I remembered correctly, the last conversation we had that involved stars, he ended up comparing my eyes to them. How sly and cheeky of you, Hikigaya-kun.
"Fufu, you're so adorable, y'know that?"
"Where did that come from?"
"Nath, it's nothing," I hugged his arm tighter, "Just thinking that aquarium's neat and all, but you're right. I do enjoy seeing the stars more."
"Mhm."
It didn't take long for us to finally get into Cosmo Planetarium Shibuya. As expected, it was indeed closing time but the door was still open for us. Hikigaya-kun led the way with me still holding onto his arm. Most of the exhibitions were already retired for the night but there was ample amount of light for us to make our way to the main hall.
As expected, it was dark and spacious with no one else in it besides us. Honestly, it felt surreal. The last time I went to a planetarium, I was but a wee little girl, staring wide-eyed at the heavens and now here I was, hand in hand with the man that makes my everyday feel like heaven.
Even if I sometimes make his everyday feel like hell.
A fun hell though.
"Ara, Hikigaya-kun," I turned to him and snickered, a teasing hand in front of my mouth, "A dark, spacious place with just the two of us. Don't tell me…we're gonna do something lewd?"
Bonk!
"Ow!"
"Get your head out of the gutter," Hikigaya-kun rudely cut me off with a love tap to my head, while I could only pout as a rebuttal, "Besides, my friend's the one operating the projector here."
"Ah, I see," I quickly recovered, bring my hands together in realization, "So if he wasn't around, we would definitely do it."
"Get your head of the gutter."
Hikigaya-kun repeated with a scowl.
"No way," I replied with a wide smile – which I know he loves.
A deep sigh escaped his lips before he squeezed my hand and dragged me to the center of the hall, where an extremely comfortable looking viewing chair was situated. Honestly, though I expected flowers and balloons to adorn it, complete with an LED screen of my name behind it but hey, this was certainly more than enough.
As we sat down, I instinctively leaned into Hikigaya-kun's shoulders, who didn't budge at all as he squeezed my hand even tighter as the lights finally dimmed and the projections started showing. It was honestly surreal to see this again, especially as since the projections seemed vastly improved compared to my last viewing of it.
Planets, Stars, Galaxies, and other ethereal celestial bodies zoomed past and rotated around us. And even though I was still holding onto Hikigaya-kun, I still felt lost in the cosmos. A strange sense of smallness overcame me as I observed all those sparkling, twinkling objects in the night sky and wondered how it would feel like to float through the dark empty void of space and just…exist out there.
Well, that would physically be impossible, but maybe one day, I could become a totally omnipotent being and I'd finally be able to see those heavenly bodies with my own two eyes.
Though doing so would mean leaving Hikigaya-kun alone. And if I have to leave my favorite personal assistant in order to be one with the stars, then that wouldn't be a good deal at all, would it? So, even if I did become god, I'd still choose Hikigaya-kun. He's way more fun after all. Also takes great care of me too.
However, something rather unexpected occurred.
One second, I was being amazed and entranced by the stars in the dark void of space.
The next, I was in said dark voice of space.
"Uhh, what?" I said out loud – a bit too loudly in fact as I was caught off guard by the sudden darkness. In my panic, I accidentally let go of Hikigaya-kun's arm and thus, was stranded alone in this giant hall. How bothersome.
"Hikigaya-kun?" I called out to him, only to receive nothing as a response, which was really strange in and of itself, "Is this like an actual blackout or…?"
But as I trailed off, a thought suddenly popped into my head.
There was no way that someone as prepared and thoughtful as Hikigaya-kun would let me go when a blackout like this happens. In fact, he would clutch me oh so tightly to his rugged chest while making sure that I know he's there.
The fact that he wasn't told me one simple thing; this was merely a prank.
A small, harmless practical joke that would simply annoy me as Hikigaya-kun would then appear from the dark, chuckling in that smug, self-satisfied tone of his. It would then be accompanied by the projection screen showing my name and a big bold text wishing me a happy birthday, most likely with cake appearing right in front of me.
How predictable, boyfriend of mine.
"Okay, real funny, Hikigaya-kun," I chastised him once noticing that the lights still hadn't turned back on, "Y'know, I have half a mind to use my phone's flashlight, find you, then beat the crap out of you for scaring me half to death but I'm giving you a chance here."
More silence followed my question as I began to get really annoyed. Seriously, being in the dark all alone isn't that funny. Moreover, I was wearing heels so if I was to suddenly slip, I'd seriously injure myself. How dare Hikigaya-kun let his wonderful girlfriend be in such a vulnerable state all alone?
Hmph, once he shows his face, I'll make sure he regrets this.
Just as I said that, an audible click was sounded and before long, more clicks followed as the lights of the planetarium were turned back on one after the other, revealing not a screen with my name and 'Happy Birthday' written on it, but a blank white one.
I was taken aback. Surely, there'd be cake and confetti, right? But even that was nowhere to be seen. Hikigaya-kun, why were you downgrading my birthday celebrations all of the sudden? Sure, I was getting old but that didn't warrant this sort of unfair treatment.
However, I heard a shuffling noise behind me, causing me to breathe out an exasperated sigh, as I placed my hands on my hips, "Real funny, mister. Leaving your own girlfriend in the dark. Now what do you have to say-!"
But as I turned around, I suddenly found that something got stuck in my throat.
I found that all the comedically harsh words that I'd prepared to berate him with just weren't able to escape my lips.
Swallowing down that invisible lump, I tried again but nothing happened.
My lips quivered as I was awestruck by what was in front of me.
It was Hikigaya-kun, for sure, but he wasn't at my eye level.
I was looking down at him.
He was on one knee, staring straight into my eyes.
A smirk was plastered on his handsome face but my attention wasn't focused on that.
It was on something else.
A tiny, seemingly inconsequential object that glimmered just like the stars we saw earlier.
And it was in an equally tiny red velvet box.
It was-
"E-Eh? Eeeeh?"
Random noises escaped my lips, as no matter what I do, no coherent words came out. No matter what perfect response my brain came up with, my mouth just spouted gibberish.
"Eeeh?! Y-You're…" my eyes moved to and fro between Hikigaya-kun's face to his hand. From his hand to his face. Back and forth. Left to right. Over and over and over till I almost overloaded from trying to digest what he was presenting to me.
And as a result, I couldn't help but give an involuntary chuckle. Could you blame me? Wait, was I dreaming? I must be dreaming at this rate because there was no way that Hikigaya-kun could've set this entire thing up in order to just p-p-propose to me!
Impossible!
No way!
No chance in hell!
Yet here he was, right in front of me. On one knee. A beautiful diamond ring in a box, perfectly fitting the palm of his hand. Presented to me.
ME!
And yet…
"T-This is…you're joking, right?" I chuckled again, an even more rapid pace, unable to control myself while the man in front of me looked as cool as a cucumber, "You…this is…I…"
"Nope, you're not dreaming," Hikigaya-kun smiled while also making fun of me at the same time, "And nope, not a prank either."
"But…but-!" I could feel my face heat up as my mouth contorted into an involuntary smile. It was unbelievable. HE was unbelievable. So much so that I couldn't help but bring my forearms up to my face in a pitiful attempt to hide my ever-reddening face.
And I know I was blushing, okay?! I was burning up more than a Tokyo summer and I didn't want Hikigaya-kun to see how uncool I was!
I am the one that flusters the other party in this relationship, not him!
Somehow, I was able to calm down just enough (Not entirely though) to peek through my fingers and see that calm, handsome face still waiting for me.
"You do know I can still see your cheeks, right?"
"I-I-"
"Because they are super red right now. Like crimson," he added with a small chuckle after, clearly enjoying see the fact that his girlfriend was turning into a ripe tomato.
"I know that, jeez!" I exclaimed, uselessly bring my arms to also hide the lower portion of my face, "It's just…god…Hikigaya-kun…I…"
"Yes? Take your time, Haruno."
Breathing in and out slowly, I followed his words. Counting the seconds in between breaths, my heartrate seemed to have finally calm down at a reasonable pace, though I had no doubts that my face was still burning up.
"I just…" I gulped again, feeling that familiar lump trying to stop what I wanted to say to him again, but this time, I forced through it, "…why now? Was there…something stopping you before...?"
Was it a mistake to ask such a somber question during such a wonderful occasion? Perhaps. Could I just have accepted what he was going to ask me without prying into it? Of course. But I wouldn't feel satisfied this way.
I wanted to know.
I had to know.
"Aha…I suppose I expected that question," he shrugged, "Well…you've always asked me when we're going to get hitched, and each time, I always try to dodge that question."
I nodded and he shook his head, almost in disappointment, "Bad habit, I know but I wasn't lying when I said that I was still trying to understand myself."
Hikigaya-kun paused, taking a deep breath as if trying to compose himself, "And even though we basically act like a married couple, I was still hesitant on totally committing to it. I guess on some level, I was okay with the status quo and just…staying the way we are. Forever."
He looked at my face and chuckled, both of us realizing how absurd that train of thought was.
"Yeah, kind of ridiculous, I know," he admitted, "I…was scared. We both got with each other under rather…rough circumstances and I think because of that, I was reluctant to fully dedicating myself to another relationship."
"You're a wonderful person and I knew that I want to spend my life with you but I didn't want you to feel like just a rebound. I didn't want you to feel like this is just a relationship of convenience," Hikigaya-kun further explained as he got up slowly, picking the ring out from its tiny container before cradling my left hand in such a tender fashion.
"I don't want you to feel like you're just a Yukinoshita or as someone's sister."
Oh god, this was bad. I could feel my eyes and cheeks getting wetter. Even my vision was bubbly and blurry as my hand shook, only kept steady by Hikigaya-kun's own firm one.
"I want to see you as Haruno. Beautiful, smart, and slightly annoying Haruno."
I nodded rapidly at his apt descriptions, chuckles escaping my covered lips.
"And well, I know this isn't not the smoothest of speeches and you've always loved those romance confessions from those J-dramas we watch, but…" Still shaking, I made a pitiful attempt at steadying my hand for Hikigaya-kun to adorn it with the ring. In all honestly, I thought that I would knock the ring out of his hand from how shaky mine was.
But just like in our everyday life, Hikigaya-kun firmly yet softly kept a grip on me. His dead-fish yet softened eyes watched with attention as he carefully inserted that beautiful diamond ring onto my dainty little finger.
"Will you allow me the privilege of making you pancakes every morning?"
He gave such a handsome smile that words couldn't even escape my lips.
Either that or the tears blocking my view were also clogging up my throat.
So, I nodded.
I nodded hard and fast. Over and over. Humming in agreement at the man who was about to become my fiancé.
"Mm hm!"
But being the annoying tease that he was, he tightened his hold on my hand and raised an eyebrow.
"Is that a yes? Or should I-"
I, of course, wasn't about to let him get another one over me again.
Even though I was wearing heels.
Even though my dress could basically snap with any rapid movement.
And even though I was crying so much that it became impossible to form a coherent sentence.
I simply lunged forward, uncaring of where I ended up because I knew that Hikigaya-kun would always be there for me – and I would always be there for him too. Now, then, and forever.
Only one thought occupied my mind as my lips clashed with his sweet, tender ones.
Best birthday ever.