Chapter Three: The Molested Goldfish
"How about some coffee?" Yamcha asked. Vegeta nodded.
"Coffee, PLEASE! Now who did you say I was???" Vegeta looked at Bulma. Bulma sighed.
"You're Vegeta, her wife," Goten said, pointing at Bulma.
"Wife? Sorry, don't got one!"
"And I'm your son!" Trunks jumped up.
"Son? I have no son!" Vegeta shook his head.
"WHAT'S WRONG WITH DADDY!!!!!?" Trunks ran off down the hall crying. Everyone stared off after him.
"Poor child." Eighteen said.
"Trunks, wait for me!" Goten ran after Trunks. Chi-Chi turned to Vegeta, hands on her hips.
"You should be ashamed of yourself, Vegeta!"
"Chi-Chi!" Goku whined. "Leave him alone! He's got a serious case of amnesia!"
"Leave me alone, Goku!" Chi-Chi yelled.
"Heheh, yeah, sure!" Goku cowered against the couch.
"Now none of this would of happened if you hadn't fed the boys all of that cake!" Chi-Chi yelled.
"Actually, it's our fault." Piccolo said.
"If we hadn't left VEGETA here with them…" Krillin trailed off.
"He wouldn't of fed them the cake." Eighteen finished.
"Huh???" Chi-Chi blinked.
"I'm gonna go check on Trunks." Gohan said.
"I'm coming with you!" Videl and Gohan left the kitchen.
"Okay, so…" Vegeta took his coffee from Yamcha. "Who are you people?"
"We're your friends- wait, no, more like-" Krillin hit Goku.
"Are you insane!?" Krillin asked.
"Huh?" Goku blinked.
"This is our chance!" Piccolo exclaimed.
"Hello-o!" Vegeta said.
"We're your friends!" Yamcha exclaimed.
"Yep!" Piccolo nodded. "Your bestest friends in the entire world!"
"Oh, okay." Vegeta blinked. "Cool! I have lots of bestest friends, don't I?"
"Yes, you do." Eighteen nodded.
"No, you don't-"
"SSSSHHHHHHH!!!!!!!" Everyone covered Goku's mouth except for Vegeta and Bulma.
"Shut up, stupid!" Krillin yelled.
"Man, how stupid ARE you Saiyans!?" Yamcha demanded.
"PRETTY stupid!" Goku grinned. Goku's grin disappeared and he looked confused. "Wait…"
"Ugh!" Piccolo rolled his eyes. "No wonder my planet lasted longer than yours."
*~*~*
"Hey, we left the game on…" Goku said, looking at the TV. "Hey, Krillin, grab the other controller!"
"Um… okay, Goku…" Krillin picked up the other controller and un paused it. They finished the final level and Goku screamed.
"WE GOT GOGETA!!!!!!!!" Goku yelled.
"HUH!!!!?" Everyone except Vegeta rushed over to the TV. Vegeta blinked.
"Who's Gogeta…?" Vegeta frowned. "Whoever he is, he's stealing all of my attention!"
"*COOL*!" Trunks started jumping up and down. "Now Goten and I can both be unlcokable characters!"
"YAAAAAAAAAAYYYYY!!!!!!!!" Goten grinned.
*~*~*
"Who am I??? Who are you!??? And who are you!!??? WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!?????????" Vegeta ran from the room screaming. Bulma started crying and Chi-Chi and Eighteen tried to comfort her.
"WE'RE DOOMED!!!!" Trunks yelled. "WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!!!"
"Trunks, calm down," Piccolo said. "Your father's only got amnesia!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!" Trunks ran from the room screaming.
*~*~*
"Who are you again???" Vegeta asked. Bulma screamed and broke down in tears.
"VEGETA, I AM *SICK* OF YOU!!!" Bulma yelled. "YOU DON'T REMEMBER *ME*, AND YOU DON'T REMEMBER YOUR SON!! AND FOR GOODNESS SAKE! YOU DON'T EVEN REMEMBER GOKU!!!!"
"Good point." Yamcha said.
"I'VE HAD IT!!!!!!!" Bulma slapped Vegeta and he was knocked unconscious and Bulma gasped.
"Whoa-ho-ho-hoa!" Goku grinned. "You hit him pretty hard, Bulma!"
"What have I done??? I'm so sorry! Vegeta…!" Bulma fainted and fell across Vegeta's stomach.
"Hm…?" Vegeta opened his eyes and spotted Bulma. "AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!! WHAT IS SHE *DOING*!!!!!!!!!!???"
"Um…" Everyone was silent.
"DOGPILE!!!!!!" Goten screamed and jumped on top of Vegeta.
"NO!!! GET OFF OF ME!!!!" Trunks grinned and jumped on top of Goten. Vegeta screamed. "ALL OF YOU PEOPLE STAY AWAY FROM MEEEEEE!!!!!!!"
*~*~*
"Hm? What's this?" Videl leaned over and picked up the solid, orange object on the floor. It was a goldfish (cracker) without a tail! "AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"
Once again, Gohan appeared instantly. "WHAT!? WHAT IS IT!??? AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!! THAT POOR GOLDFISH!!!!!!!!!"
Everyone started appearing and examining the goldfish. Eighteen covered Marron's eyes, and shook her head. "That poor thing…"
"It didn't deserve it." Piccolo said, shaking his head. He sniffed. "IT DIDN'T DESERVE IT!!!!!!!!!"
Piccolo ran off down the hall crying. "Um…"
*~*~*
"HA! Beat you!" Goten yelled.
"Oh, man…!" Trunks sighed, and looked at Goten. He froze and went pale.
"What is it, Trunks?" Goten asked.
"L-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-"
"Spit it out already!"
"I-in your hair!" Trunks pointed at Goten's hair, trembling.
"My hai-er…?" Goten reached up and pulled a solid object from his hair. He screamed at what he saw. It was a goldfish (cracker) with a hole through its stomach. Goku and Chi-Chi appeared before anyone else.
"What is it!!!!!?" Goku asked.
"What's the mat- AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" Chi-Chi screamed.
"SAVE THE CHILDREN!!!!!!!!!" Krillin yelled and grabbed Trunks. He made a beeline over the couch and out of the house. Goku grabbed his frozen son, causing him to drop the goldfish, then rushed out of the house after Krillin.
"It's only a molested goldfish…" Eighteen said.
*~*~*
"Any clues on who's been scrutinizing the goldfish?" Gohan asked.
"Nope." Goku shook his head.
"That doesn't seem too good." Videl said.
"Nope." Goku shook his head.
"Is it time for lunch yet?" Gohan asked.
"Nope-"
"DAD, SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!"
"Well you wanted to know…" Goku frowned.
*~*~*
"Hey, Daddy, the goldfish wanted to go for a swim!" Goten exclaimed. There were goldfish (crackers) in the hot tub.
"Oh my *GOSH*, LOOK AT THAT ONE!!!!!!!" Trunks yelled, pointing at a goldfish who had a hole for an eye. They started realizing that all of the goldfish had been messed up. They all screamed and ran from the bathroom butt naked.
*~*~*
"What's all that RACKET?" Bulma cracked the door open and immediately shut the sliding door. "They're doing it again."
"I-is Gohan out there?" Chi-Chi asked. Bulma nodded.
"Yeah." Chi-Chi grinned, grabbed Videl's arm, opened the door, and threw her out into the hall.
"CHI-CHI!!!!!!!!!!" Luckily, Videl grabbed a towel before the door closed. (A/n: sure, Lyndsi would of preferred it WITHOUT the towel, but this is for my fans, not my best friends. And I must remember not to make the ratings go up too much…^^;;;) Videl mumbled something and wrapped the towel around her body. She heard a scream and looked up to see the men running around the corner. She snickered, and started walking off in the opposite direction. Something tugged on her towel. "Huh?"
"Hey, Videl, you wanna see all of the molested goldfish in our bathroom?" Goten asked. Videl smiled.
"Is that what all of this is about?" Videl asked. Goten and Trunks nodded. "Well, you two go dry off and put on some clothes."
"Okay!" Trunks and Goten ran off after the men. The door to the women's restroom started shaking and screams came from inside.
"CHI-CHI, OPEN THE DOOR!!!" Bulma screamed.
"NEVERRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!! THE GRANDCHILDREN MUST COME!!!!!!!!"
"Oh, SHUT *UP*!!!" Eighteen jerked open the door and the two non-grandchildren obsessed women gasped.
"Videl, are you alright!?"
"Uh, yeah, I'm FINE…"
*~*~*
"NOT *ANOTHER*!" Eighteen rolled her eyes and picked up the goldfish (cracker) without a head. "Hey, look, there's a whole line of them…"
"These goldfish met with foul play." Goku said, frowning.
"Yeah," Gohan nodded. "Something like that."
"Let's follow them!" Chi-Chi exclaimed. "Then we can find out is who is the culprit!" Everyone stared. "Whatever!"
So all of them walked off down the hall, slowly Goten appeared, who was picking up the goldfish (cracker) pieces and eating them. He ran over to the next piece, picked it up, popped it in his mouth, then ran off screen to get the next piece.
"They lead to Piccolo's room!" They all looked at Piccolo.
"I DIDN'T DO IT!" Piccolo yelled. "HOW CAN YOU ACCUSE ME??? THEY DON'T DESERVE IT!!!!!!!" Piccolo ran off, but stopped in front of Goten. Gotten looked up at Piccolo and popped a goldfish (cracker) in his mouth. Piccolo gasped. "GOTEN!!! HOW *COULD* YOU!!!???? FIRST THEY WERE MURDERED! AND NOW YOU ARE EATING WHAT IS LEFT OF THEIR POOR LITTLE BODIES!!!!! THEY DESERVE A PROPER BARIAL, AND NOT THE CRUEL FATE THAT YOU HAVE DEALT THEM!!!!! IT'S NOT FAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Piccolo ran off to the other end of the house. "They're just goldfish…" Goten sniffed. "I was hungry…" Goten sniffed. "WHY IS EVERYONE YELLING AT ME-EEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!?"
Goten ran off after Piccolo crying. "Oh…." Everyone frowned.
"Hang on, there's movement…" Krillin said.
"Huh?" They all peered into Piccolo's room, to see a certain Saiyan Prince biting the heads or tails or fin off the goldfish (crackers). They all gasped. "VEGETA!!!!!!!"
"HAHAHA!!!" Vegeta grinned evilly. "THEY WILL ALL SUFFER BECAUSE THEY DID NOT BOW DOWN TO THE GREAT VEGETA!!!!!!!!!!"
"HE'S GOT HIS MEMORY BACK!!!" Everyone screamed.
"What do you mean? Of COURSE I have my memory back! What is WRONG with you people?" Vegeta paused. "Wait a minute, when did I LOSE my memory?" They all walked off whistling. "GUY-UYS!!!!"
Well THAT was an awfully short chapter! So now that he has been caught red-handed, will Vegeta stop his reign of terror to the goldfish (crackers)? In the nxt chapter, DBZ Fan girls (and boys) of all ages fight to free our heroes from Frieza's Island! Will they succeed? Will they really get them off Frieza's island??? Or will they just drive our heroes insane? Find out next time, on FHI: The Fan Girls… and Boys!
"How about some coffee?" Yamcha asked. Vegeta nodded.
"Coffee, PLEASE! Now who did you say I was???" Vegeta looked at Bulma. Bulma sighed.
"You're Vegeta, her wife," Goten said, pointing at Bulma.
"Wife? Sorry, don't got one!"
"And I'm your son!" Trunks jumped up.
"Son? I have no son!" Vegeta shook his head.
"WHAT'S WRONG WITH DADDY!!!!!?" Trunks ran off down the hall crying. Everyone stared off after him.
"Poor child." Eighteen said.
"Trunks, wait for me!" Goten ran after Trunks. Chi-Chi turned to Vegeta, hands on her hips.
"You should be ashamed of yourself, Vegeta!"
"Chi-Chi!" Goku whined. "Leave him alone! He's got a serious case of amnesia!"
"Leave me alone, Goku!" Chi-Chi yelled.
"Heheh, yeah, sure!" Goku cowered against the couch.
"Now none of this would of happened if you hadn't fed the boys all of that cake!" Chi-Chi yelled.
"Actually, it's our fault." Piccolo said.
"If we hadn't left VEGETA here with them…" Krillin trailed off.
"He wouldn't of fed them the cake." Eighteen finished.
"Huh???" Chi-Chi blinked.
"I'm gonna go check on Trunks." Gohan said.
"I'm coming with you!" Videl and Gohan left the kitchen.
"Okay, so…" Vegeta took his coffee from Yamcha. "Who are you people?"
"We're your friends- wait, no, more like-" Krillin hit Goku.
"Are you insane!?" Krillin asked.
"Huh?" Goku blinked.
"This is our chance!" Piccolo exclaimed.
"Hello-o!" Vegeta said.
"We're your friends!" Yamcha exclaimed.
"Yep!" Piccolo nodded. "Your bestest friends in the entire world!"
"Oh, okay." Vegeta blinked. "Cool! I have lots of bestest friends, don't I?"
"Yes, you do." Eighteen nodded.
"No, you don't-"
"SSSSHHHHHHH!!!!!!!" Everyone covered Goku's mouth except for Vegeta and Bulma.
"Shut up, stupid!" Krillin yelled.
"Man, how stupid ARE you Saiyans!?" Yamcha demanded.
"PRETTY stupid!" Goku grinned. Goku's grin disappeared and he looked confused. "Wait…"
"Ugh!" Piccolo rolled his eyes. "No wonder my planet lasted longer than yours."
*~*~*
"Hey, we left the game on…" Goku said, looking at the TV. "Hey, Krillin, grab the other controller!"
"Um… okay, Goku…" Krillin picked up the other controller and un paused it. They finished the final level and Goku screamed.
"WE GOT GOGETA!!!!!!!!" Goku yelled.
"HUH!!!!?" Everyone except Vegeta rushed over to the TV. Vegeta blinked.
"Who's Gogeta…?" Vegeta frowned. "Whoever he is, he's stealing all of my attention!"
"*COOL*!" Trunks started jumping up and down. "Now Goten and I can both be unlcokable characters!"
"YAAAAAAAAAAYYYYY!!!!!!!!" Goten grinned.
*~*~*
"Who am I??? Who are you!??? And who are you!!??? WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!?????????" Vegeta ran from the room screaming. Bulma started crying and Chi-Chi and Eighteen tried to comfort her.
"WE'RE DOOMED!!!!" Trunks yelled. "WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!!!"
"Trunks, calm down," Piccolo said. "Your father's only got amnesia!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!" Trunks ran from the room screaming.
*~*~*
"Who are you again???" Vegeta asked. Bulma screamed and broke down in tears.
"VEGETA, I AM *SICK* OF YOU!!!" Bulma yelled. "YOU DON'T REMEMBER *ME*, AND YOU DON'T REMEMBER YOUR SON!! AND FOR GOODNESS SAKE! YOU DON'T EVEN REMEMBER GOKU!!!!"
"Good point." Yamcha said.
"I'VE HAD IT!!!!!!!" Bulma slapped Vegeta and he was knocked unconscious and Bulma gasped.
"Whoa-ho-ho-hoa!" Goku grinned. "You hit him pretty hard, Bulma!"
"What have I done??? I'm so sorry! Vegeta…!" Bulma fainted and fell across Vegeta's stomach.
"Hm…?" Vegeta opened his eyes and spotted Bulma. "AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!! WHAT IS SHE *DOING*!!!!!!!!!!???"
"Um…" Everyone was silent.
"DOGPILE!!!!!!" Goten screamed and jumped on top of Vegeta.
"NO!!! GET OFF OF ME!!!!" Trunks grinned and jumped on top of Goten. Vegeta screamed. "ALL OF YOU PEOPLE STAY AWAY FROM MEEEEEE!!!!!!!"
*~*~*
"Hm? What's this?" Videl leaned over and picked up the solid, orange object on the floor. It was a goldfish (cracker) without a tail! "AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"
Once again, Gohan appeared instantly. "WHAT!? WHAT IS IT!??? AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!! THAT POOR GOLDFISH!!!!!!!!!"
Everyone started appearing and examining the goldfish. Eighteen covered Marron's eyes, and shook her head. "That poor thing…"
"It didn't deserve it." Piccolo said, shaking his head. He sniffed. "IT DIDN'T DESERVE IT!!!!!!!!!"
Piccolo ran off down the hall crying. "Um…"
*~*~*
"HA! Beat you!" Goten yelled.
"Oh, man…!" Trunks sighed, and looked at Goten. He froze and went pale.
"What is it, Trunks?" Goten asked.
"L-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-"
"Spit it out already!"
"I-in your hair!" Trunks pointed at Goten's hair, trembling.
"My hai-er…?" Goten reached up and pulled a solid object from his hair. He screamed at what he saw. It was a goldfish (cracker) with a hole through its stomach. Goku and Chi-Chi appeared before anyone else.
"What is it!!!!!?" Goku asked.
"What's the mat- AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" Chi-Chi screamed.
"SAVE THE CHILDREN!!!!!!!!!" Krillin yelled and grabbed Trunks. He made a beeline over the couch and out of the house. Goku grabbed his frozen son, causing him to drop the goldfish, then rushed out of the house after Krillin.
"It's only a molested goldfish…" Eighteen said.
*~*~*
"Any clues on who's been scrutinizing the goldfish?" Gohan asked.
"Nope." Goku shook his head.
"That doesn't seem too good." Videl said.
"Nope." Goku shook his head.
"Is it time for lunch yet?" Gohan asked.
"Nope-"
"DAD, SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!"
"Well you wanted to know…" Goku frowned.
*~*~*
"Hey, Daddy, the goldfish wanted to go for a swim!" Goten exclaimed. There were goldfish (crackers) in the hot tub.
"Oh my *GOSH*, LOOK AT THAT ONE!!!!!!!" Trunks yelled, pointing at a goldfish who had a hole for an eye. They started realizing that all of the goldfish had been messed up. They all screamed and ran from the bathroom butt naked.
*~*~*
"What's all that RACKET?" Bulma cracked the door open and immediately shut the sliding door. "They're doing it again."
"I-is Gohan out there?" Chi-Chi asked. Bulma nodded.
"Yeah." Chi-Chi grinned, grabbed Videl's arm, opened the door, and threw her out into the hall.
"CHI-CHI!!!!!!!!!!" Luckily, Videl grabbed a towel before the door closed. (A/n: sure, Lyndsi would of preferred it WITHOUT the towel, but this is for my fans, not my best friends. And I must remember not to make the ratings go up too much…^^;;;) Videl mumbled something and wrapped the towel around her body. She heard a scream and looked up to see the men running around the corner. She snickered, and started walking off in the opposite direction. Something tugged on her towel. "Huh?"
"Hey, Videl, you wanna see all of the molested goldfish in our bathroom?" Goten asked. Videl smiled.
"Is that what all of this is about?" Videl asked. Goten and Trunks nodded. "Well, you two go dry off and put on some clothes."
"Okay!" Trunks and Goten ran off after the men. The door to the women's restroom started shaking and screams came from inside.
"CHI-CHI, OPEN THE DOOR!!!" Bulma screamed.
"NEVERRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!! THE GRANDCHILDREN MUST COME!!!!!!!!"
"Oh, SHUT *UP*!!!" Eighteen jerked open the door and the two non-grandchildren obsessed women gasped.
"Videl, are you alright!?"
"Uh, yeah, I'm FINE…"
*~*~*
"NOT *ANOTHER*!" Eighteen rolled her eyes and picked up the goldfish (cracker) without a head. "Hey, look, there's a whole line of them…"
"These goldfish met with foul play." Goku said, frowning.
"Yeah," Gohan nodded. "Something like that."
"Let's follow them!" Chi-Chi exclaimed. "Then we can find out is who is the culprit!" Everyone stared. "Whatever!"
So all of them walked off down the hall, slowly Goten appeared, who was picking up the goldfish (cracker) pieces and eating them. He ran over to the next piece, picked it up, popped it in his mouth, then ran off screen to get the next piece.
"They lead to Piccolo's room!" They all looked at Piccolo.
"I DIDN'T DO IT!" Piccolo yelled. "HOW CAN YOU ACCUSE ME??? THEY DON'T DESERVE IT!!!!!!!" Piccolo ran off, but stopped in front of Goten. Gotten looked up at Piccolo and popped a goldfish (cracker) in his mouth. Piccolo gasped. "GOTEN!!! HOW *COULD* YOU!!!???? FIRST THEY WERE MURDERED! AND NOW YOU ARE EATING WHAT IS LEFT OF THEIR POOR LITTLE BODIES!!!!! THEY DESERVE A PROPER BARIAL, AND NOT THE CRUEL FATE THAT YOU HAVE DEALT THEM!!!!! IT'S NOT FAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Piccolo ran off to the other end of the house. "They're just goldfish…" Goten sniffed. "I was hungry…" Goten sniffed. "WHY IS EVERYONE YELLING AT ME-EEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!?"
Goten ran off after Piccolo crying. "Oh…." Everyone frowned.
"Hang on, there's movement…" Krillin said.
"Huh?" They all peered into Piccolo's room, to see a certain Saiyan Prince biting the heads or tails or fin off the goldfish (crackers). They all gasped. "VEGETA!!!!!!!"
"HAHAHA!!!" Vegeta grinned evilly. "THEY WILL ALL SUFFER BECAUSE THEY DID NOT BOW DOWN TO THE GREAT VEGETA!!!!!!!!!!"
"HE'S GOT HIS MEMORY BACK!!!" Everyone screamed.
"What do you mean? Of COURSE I have my memory back! What is WRONG with you people?" Vegeta paused. "Wait a minute, when did I LOSE my memory?" They all walked off whistling. "GUY-UYS!!!!"
Well THAT was an awfully short chapter! So now that he has been caught red-handed, will Vegeta stop his reign of terror to the goldfish (crackers)? In the nxt chapter, DBZ Fan girls (and boys) of all ages fight to free our heroes from Frieza's Island! Will they succeed? Will they really get them off Frieza's island??? Or will they just drive our heroes insane? Find out next time, on FHI: The Fan Girls… and Boys!