Chapter Five: Entertainment Needed!
"What can we DO?" Goku asked.
"I have NO idea…" Yamcha sighed.
"Hey, we can have a talent show!" Videl exclaimed.
"Cool!" Gohan jumped up. "That'll be awesome! I can- oh, wait! I'd better keep it a surprise!"
"Alright, then, let's do it!" Bulma said, standing up.
*~*~*
Trunks walked out in front of the couch, dressed in a tuxedo. "Greetings to the FHI Talent Show!" (All look very confused. Greetings TO the FHI Talent show…?) I will be your host: Trunks!" Everyone on the couch clapped. "Our first act will be performed by Son Goten!" Everyone clapped as Goten jumped off the couch and ran forward. He started twirling a baton with one hand.
"Duhdidudaduhduhduhduh!!!!!" Goten sang as he twirled the baton around. "Duhdiduhduhduhnduhdu-AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!" The baton was sent flying from Goten's hand, hitting Vegeta in the forehead. Goten covered his mouth as Vegeta was knocked backwards, and out the window. Goku cracked up laughing, followed by everyone else. Goten smiled and bowed. Vegeta crawled back through the window holding his head.
"Owwwww…."
"Right, then…" Goten ran back over to the couch and sat down. Gohan gave him a high five. "Our next act will be performed by our favorite Namek-"
"FAVORITISM!!!!!!!!!!" They all heard Dende yell from SOMEWHERE…
"Um… Piccolo!"
Piccolo came out without a shirt, juggling flaming torches. Everyone rammed themselves up against the back of the couch. "Hey! What's wrong? Don't you guys trust me?"
A torch went flying out the window and Frieza screamed from outside. Everyone jumped up and looked out the window. "SEE!!!?????? THIS IS WHY I HATE NAMEKS!!!!!"
*~*~*
So Frieza joined the audience in watching the "FHI Talent Show", and the show continued. "Our next act will be performed by Videl, Chi-Chi, and Bulma! They will be doing the triple fusion!"
"Do we really have to do this again?" Videl asked. Trunks nodded. "Okay…"
"Fuuuuuuuuusiioooooooon! HA!!!!" The three fused, and once again, Chibel appeared. She smiled and everybody started clapping.
"Ooh!" Goku said.
"Ahhh!" Gohan said. Chibel smiled and split.
"Cool! you go, Mom! Now Yamcha is going to… ATTEMPT to play us a song on his… violin…" Trunks sat down in front of the couch and loosened his bowtie. Yamcha bowed and put the violin into position. He started playing- er…. SQUEAKING. Everyone screamed and covered their ears from the horrid noise. Yamcha finally finished and gave a final bow. He put the violin back in it's case and sat down.
"Oooooookay!" Trunks cleared his throat. "Our upcoming act will be-"
"Ooh! Ooh! Let me go!" Frieza exclaimed, waving his hand around in the air.
"What… can you do?"
"I can REGENERATE!" Vegeta crossed his arms.
"This should be interesting."
"Alright, then," Trunks said. "Frieza will be performing his regenerating act for us!"
"Now I need a volunteer…" Frieza said.
"ME! ME!" Vegeta was waving his hand around in the air.
"Okee, then, Vegiti-chan." Frieza said. "I need you to blow me up!"
"Hee hee hee!" Vegeta popped his knuckles. "HA!"
Vegeta started shooting Frieza constantly, laughing evilly. "YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BLOW UP FRIEZA, NOT THE HOUSE!!!!"
"Oops… sorry!" Frieza regenerated.
"Ta da!!!!" Everyone clapped and Frieza bowed. "Thank you! Thank you!"
"Now our upcoming act will be performed by the five Saiyans," Trunks said. Vegeta, Goku, Goten, and Gohan stood up. "But while we're waiting, we're going to have Eighteen tell us some jokes!"
"IT SAYS KRILLIN!!!!" Eighteen yelled.
"Really?" Trunks picked up the index card. "Oh! I guess it does! Okay, then! Here's KRILLIN!!!!!"
"Doo doo doo DOO! Doo doo doo doo DOO!" That freak-o game show music started up.
"Thank you, thank you!" Krillin bowed. He was wearing a white tuxedo with a white bowtie. "I'm Krillin the comedian and I am here to flatter YOU!" Krillin said, holding out his hand.
"Duh-duh duhn!" The drums said. Everyone stared.
"Ahem!" Krillin cleared his throat. "Yes. Have you guys heard the one about the Panda?" Everyone shook their heads. "Okay! One day, a Panda walked into a restaurant. When the waiter came to give him the bill, he pulled out a shotgun and shot the waiter! Then the panda left. So some people followed the panda and asked: 'Mr. Panda Bear, why did you shoot the waiter? That's just not your nature!'. So then the panda said: 'Oh yes it is! Go look it up at the library!'. So they all went to the library and looked panda up in the encyclopedia. It said: 'Eats: shoots and leaves."
"Duh-duh duhn!" The drums sang.
Everyone started laughing and clapping. Bulma was silent, however. "I don't get it…"
"Well, Bulma," Yamcha said. "It's a category. The panda eats shoots and leaves. Bamboo shoots and leaves!"
"Oh, okay! Now I get it!" Bulma smiled. "Thank you, Yamcha!"
"Sure, Bulma…" Piccolo nudged him and Yamcha blushed.
"Okay," Krillin said. "A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink. Then the bartender looks at him and says: 'Hey, fella, why the long face?'!"
"Duh-duh duhn!" The drums rang.
Frieza cracked up laughing and fell off the couch. Everyone stared at him. (A/n: I don't know about Frieza, but every time I hear that joke, I just laugh at the stupidity of it.) Frieza got back up and wiped a tear from his eye. "Oh my gosh, that's a good one!"
"Um, right!" Krillin smiled. "And after this act, I'll be back with some more jokes! Now here are the "Five Saiyans", with "Bye bye bye"!"
Everyone clapped just to be nice and then the five Saiyans came back out, and stood there for a second. From right to left: Gohan, Goku, and Vegeta stood behind Goten and Trunks.
"Hey hey-ey-ey-ey! Bye bye bye!" Goku sang. All of the others echoed it. Everyone started clapping and hollering. They echoed again. The five Saiyans were dressed like *N Sync(proper placement?) in their music video "Bye Bye Bye". "Oh oh!"
"I!" They all sang.
"I'm doin this tonight!" Goku sang.
"You're!" They all sang.
"Prob'ly gonna start a fight!"
"I!"
"Know this can't be right! Hey, baby, come on!" Goku sang.
"I!"
"Loved you endlessly!"
"And!" They all said.
"You were left for me!"
"So!"
"Now it's time to leave and make it alo-one!" Goku sang.
"I know that I can't take no more! It ain't no lie-ie! I wanna see you out that door!" Now Goten and Trunks were singing.
"Baby, bye bye bye!" They all sang. They all started doing the movements. (A/n: Why did they start just now…?) So they sang through the chorus.
"You just hit me with the truth!" Now Gohan was singing.
"Now!" They all sang.
"Girl you're more than welcome to!" Gohan sang.
"So!"
"Give me one good reason to! Baby, come on!"
"I!"
"Live for you and me!"
"And!"
"Now I really come to see-ee!"
"That!"
"Life would be much better-er- once you're go-one!"
"I know that I can't take no more! It ain't no li-ie!" Goten and Trunks were signing again. "I-I wanna see you out that door!"
"Baby, bye bye bye!" They all sang. They went into the chorus again.
"I'm giving up I know for sure! Don't' wanna be the reason for your love no more!" They all sang. "Bye bye! I'm checkin out, I'm signin off!" Don't wanna be the loser and I've had enough!"
"Don't wanna be your fool in this game for two!" Vegeta sang. They all joined in:
"So I'm leavin- you- behind!"
"Bye bye bye!" Vegeta sang.
"I don't wanna make it tough!" Everyone but Vegeta sang.
"Make it tough!" Vegeta repeated.
"But I had enough!"
"Bye byyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyye!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Vegeta held it as they all sang:
"And it ain't no lie!"
"Babyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Vegeta sang.
"Whoo!" Bulma said. They all started clapping as the five Saiyans went into the chorus. But after they said: "Baby, bye bye bye", Trunks and Goten would sing: "Bye bye!" The repeated the chorus and the song finished off:
"Bye bye!" Goten and Trunks sang.
"YAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!" Marron started clapping along with the others. The five Saiyans bowed and left to go change.
"Doo doo doo DOO! Doo doo doo doo DOO!" The freak-o game show music started up again as Krillin walked out. (A/n: o.O)
"Thank you! Thank you! I'm Krillin the comedian, and I am here to entertain YOU!" Krillin held a hand out at the audience. No applause…AGAIN. Krillin clear his throat and straightened his bowtie. "Okay. A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender looks at him and asks: 'How are you going to pay for this?'. The duck responds: 'Just put it on my bill.'."
"Duh-duh duhn!" Everyone was silent. They all looked at Frieza, expecting him to laugh. "But that's one's not any good…"
"New joke!" Krillin exclaimed. There are five guys in an airplane caught in a jet stream: the pilot, the Smartest Guy in the World, a hippie, and two tourists. The only problem: there were four parachutes."
"So as they're all trying to figure out who should stay, one of the tourists says 'Well, I have a wife and two children. They need me!'. So they let the first tourist take a parachute, leaving three. So then the other tourist says: 'Well, I have a family to look after, too.'. so they let the tourist go." Krillin continued with his joke. "Now there are only two parachutes. So then the Smartest Guy in the World says: 'Well I'm the Smartest Guy in the World! The world needs me!'. So he takes a parachute-"
"NO!" Chi-Chi yelled. "Leave him on the plane!"
"SHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Continuing." Krillin said. "So the Smartest Guy in the World takes a parachute, so now there's only one left. So then the pilot says: 'Well, I'm the one who got us into this mess, so I'll go down with the plane.' The hippie shook his head and said: 'No way, man! The Smartest Guy in the World just jumped out with my backpack!'"
They all cracked up laughing and the five Saiyans returned to their spots on the couch, but in Goten and Trunks' case, the floor. Krillin smiled. "Okay. There are three men in a hot air balloon, trying to figure out how to decide where to build their houses. One had a golden arrow, another had a golden bullet, and the last one had a golden cannonball. So the one with the golden arrow says: 'Well, wherever this golden arrow lands is where I will build my house.'. So he shoots the arrow and goes down to find it. He found a little girl who was crying. He asked: 'Little girl, why are you crying?'. So then she responds: 'A golden arrow came down from out of the sky and popped my balloon'!"
"So then he adopts the little girl and builds his house where he found her." Krillin said. "So then the one with a golden bullet said: 'Wherever this bullet lands I will build my house.'. So he shoots the bullet and goes down to find where it landed. He found a little boy who was crying and he asked: 'Little boy, why are you crying?'."
"The little boy responds: 'This golden bullet came down from out of the sky and popped my balloon!'. So the man adopts the boy and builds his house where he found him. So then the third man said: 'Well, wherever this golden cannonball lands, I will build my house.'. So he shoots the cannonball and goes down to find where it landed. He found a little boy who was laughing and asked: 'Little boy, why are you laughing?'. So then the little boy responds: 'I farted and my house blew up'!"
"AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!" Trunks and Goten cracked up laughing. Everyone else was silent. Krillin shook his head.
"Whatever, I never liked that one much, anyway." Krillin said. Goten finally stopped laughing, but Trunks continued.
"Trunks, honey, breathe." Bulma said. Trunks gasped for air.
"Thanks, Mom."
"Trunks, you want me to tell another?" Krillin asked. "Or do you wanna just come up here and go on to the next act?
"Go ahead and do another if it's as funny as the last one!" Trunks exclaimed.
"Okay, then," Krillin straightened his bowtie again. "A man was once telling another: 'There are three kinds of people in the world. Those who can count, and those who can't."
Everyone but Goten laughed. "What's so funny? I don't get what's so funny about there being three kinds of people in the world…"
"Oh, that's right, he can't count." Krillin said. He smiled. "ANYWAY! You know a woman is going to say something smart when she begins her sentence with 'A man once told me'."
All of the men (except Goten and Trunks) cracked up laughing and the women glared at Krillin. "Hey!"
Krillin smiled nervously. "Right… Anyway, a kindergarten-aged little girl comes home and says to her mother: 'Mommy, we learned how to make babies in school today!'. The mother nearly drops the plate she is drying, put quickly regains her composure. She then asks: 'Oh really? How do you make babies?'."
"'You replace the 'y' with an 'i' and add 'es'!'" They all started laughing.
"Mom would freak out if I told her that…" Gohan said, looking at Chi-Chi. Chi-Chi laughed nervously.
"Okay, then, that's it for Krillin's act!" Trunks exclaimed, jumping up. Trunks straightened his bowtie and pulled an index card from his vest pocket. He read it over and quickly put it back. "Next up is Videl and her juggling act! After that we will have a… DIFFERENT kind of performance by Goku and Vegeta!"
Goku and Vegeta ran off to change and Videl stood up. She bowed and Gohan clapped. "Yayyyyyy!"
"Okay!" Videl started juggling the five green bean bags around. She lost one of them and it hit the wall. She continued juggling, determined on juggling at least four. Another one went flying and almost hit Chi-Chi.
"Better be careful, Videl, or she won't let you marry Gohan…!" Eighteen teased. Videl and Gohan blushed and Videl continued juggling. She was sure she could juggle three!
"Oh, shi-" Another one went flying and it hit Gohan in the forehead. Gohan was knocked unconscious, making Videl and Chi-Chi scream. The two rushed over to him and Trunks cleared his throat. Everyone but Chi-Chi and Videl looked back at Trunks. Trunks noticed that he needed to straighten his bowtie again and blushed.
"How come I have to wear this stupid tux, anyway…?" Trunks thought. Trunks straightened his bowtie and scratched the back of his head as he looked at the index card. "Goku and Vegeta will be doing- Huh…? What's the word…?" Bulma rushed over to him and whispered something in his ear. "Oh! Thanks, Mom!" Bulma sat back down and Trunks cleared his throat. "Now for our ninth act-"
"Actually, it's the tenth," Frieza said. "I'm not the list, remember? I was just a last minute sign-up."
"Oh, right." Trunks nodded. "Now, our tenth act, ladies and gentlemen: DISCOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
The lights faded, Krillin plugged in the disco ball, and Goku and Vegeta came out in their normal outfits, only their normal outfits were pure white. Goku started doing the pointy thingy, (A/n: WHAT DO YOU CALL IT!!!!!!!?????) and Vegeta just stood there, glaring at them all, arms crossed. The music struck a note and Vegeta did the splits.
"WHOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!" Everyone clapped. Vegeta used his hands to push off the ground, coming back up and looking like he was in pain. Frieza looked disgusted.
"NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" The two stopped. "YOU'RE DOING IT *ALL* WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Frieza stood up and stood in-between Goku and Vegeta. "Restart the music!" The music started and Frieza grinned.
Frieza pointed to his left with both hands, looking like they were a gun, and winked with his left eye. He then threw his hands over to point to the right, and he winked with his right eye. He did this a few times, then did a back flip and landed, doing the splits. Everyone started clapping, even Goku and Vegeta.
Frieza jumped back up, without using his hands like Vegeta did, and pointed up at the ceiling with the index finger on both hands. He pointed at the ground with his left hand at his hip, and took his right hand and started going from his hip (pointing at the ground), and then extended it (pointing at the ceiling)(A/n: in other words, the same thing Goku was doing). He did this a few more times, pointed outwards in both ways, and then he started sliding backwards, bobbing his head forward, then realigning it with his spine (A/n: my ex's bro could do that REALLY well).
Frieza turned and slid backwards in the other direction. He did a back flip and landed, pointing at the ceiling. The music cut off and everyone clapped. Frieza bowed as roses were thrown at him from out of nowhere. "Thank you! Thank you!"
"Hey, guys!" Krillin exclaimed. "Frieza's the King of Disco!"
"Whoo-hoo!"
"Alright!"
"O' King of Disco, please teacheth me to Disco as you do!" Yamcha recited.
"TOUCH MY HAND!!!!!!!!!! TOUCH MY HAND!!!!!!!!!!" Videl screamed. She cracked up laughing. "It's too funny!!!!!!"
"No it's NOT…" Gohan said, crossing his arms.
Well, I think that the FHI Talent Show was a success, don't you? In the next chapter, everyone goes to the beach! Will everyone have a good time? Will Gohan surf a pipewave? Find out next time, on FHI: To the Beach!
"What can we DO?" Goku asked.
"I have NO idea…" Yamcha sighed.
"Hey, we can have a talent show!" Videl exclaimed.
"Cool!" Gohan jumped up. "That'll be awesome! I can- oh, wait! I'd better keep it a surprise!"
"Alright, then, let's do it!" Bulma said, standing up.
*~*~*
Trunks walked out in front of the couch, dressed in a tuxedo. "Greetings to the FHI Talent Show!" (All look very confused. Greetings TO the FHI Talent show…?) I will be your host: Trunks!" Everyone on the couch clapped. "Our first act will be performed by Son Goten!" Everyone clapped as Goten jumped off the couch and ran forward. He started twirling a baton with one hand.
"Duhdidudaduhduhduhduh!!!!!" Goten sang as he twirled the baton around. "Duhdiduhduhduhnduhdu-AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!" The baton was sent flying from Goten's hand, hitting Vegeta in the forehead. Goten covered his mouth as Vegeta was knocked backwards, and out the window. Goku cracked up laughing, followed by everyone else. Goten smiled and bowed. Vegeta crawled back through the window holding his head.
"Owwwww…."
"Right, then…" Goten ran back over to the couch and sat down. Gohan gave him a high five. "Our next act will be performed by our favorite Namek-"
"FAVORITISM!!!!!!!!!!" They all heard Dende yell from SOMEWHERE…
"Um… Piccolo!"
Piccolo came out without a shirt, juggling flaming torches. Everyone rammed themselves up against the back of the couch. "Hey! What's wrong? Don't you guys trust me?"
A torch went flying out the window and Frieza screamed from outside. Everyone jumped up and looked out the window. "SEE!!!?????? THIS IS WHY I HATE NAMEKS!!!!!"
*~*~*
So Frieza joined the audience in watching the "FHI Talent Show", and the show continued. "Our next act will be performed by Videl, Chi-Chi, and Bulma! They will be doing the triple fusion!"
"Do we really have to do this again?" Videl asked. Trunks nodded. "Okay…"
"Fuuuuuuuuusiioooooooon! HA!!!!" The three fused, and once again, Chibel appeared. She smiled and everybody started clapping.
"Ooh!" Goku said.
"Ahhh!" Gohan said. Chibel smiled and split.
"Cool! you go, Mom! Now Yamcha is going to… ATTEMPT to play us a song on his… violin…" Trunks sat down in front of the couch and loosened his bowtie. Yamcha bowed and put the violin into position. He started playing- er…. SQUEAKING. Everyone screamed and covered their ears from the horrid noise. Yamcha finally finished and gave a final bow. He put the violin back in it's case and sat down.
"Oooooookay!" Trunks cleared his throat. "Our upcoming act will be-"
"Ooh! Ooh! Let me go!" Frieza exclaimed, waving his hand around in the air.
"What… can you do?"
"I can REGENERATE!" Vegeta crossed his arms.
"This should be interesting."
"Alright, then," Trunks said. "Frieza will be performing his regenerating act for us!"
"Now I need a volunteer…" Frieza said.
"ME! ME!" Vegeta was waving his hand around in the air.
"Okee, then, Vegiti-chan." Frieza said. "I need you to blow me up!"
"Hee hee hee!" Vegeta popped his knuckles. "HA!"
Vegeta started shooting Frieza constantly, laughing evilly. "YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BLOW UP FRIEZA, NOT THE HOUSE!!!!"
"Oops… sorry!" Frieza regenerated.
"Ta da!!!!" Everyone clapped and Frieza bowed. "Thank you! Thank you!"
"Now our upcoming act will be performed by the five Saiyans," Trunks said. Vegeta, Goku, Goten, and Gohan stood up. "But while we're waiting, we're going to have Eighteen tell us some jokes!"
"IT SAYS KRILLIN!!!!" Eighteen yelled.
"Really?" Trunks picked up the index card. "Oh! I guess it does! Okay, then! Here's KRILLIN!!!!!"
"Doo doo doo DOO! Doo doo doo doo DOO!" That freak-o game show music started up.
"Thank you, thank you!" Krillin bowed. He was wearing a white tuxedo with a white bowtie. "I'm Krillin the comedian and I am here to flatter YOU!" Krillin said, holding out his hand.
"Duh-duh duhn!" The drums said. Everyone stared.
"Ahem!" Krillin cleared his throat. "Yes. Have you guys heard the one about the Panda?" Everyone shook their heads. "Okay! One day, a Panda walked into a restaurant. When the waiter came to give him the bill, he pulled out a shotgun and shot the waiter! Then the panda left. So some people followed the panda and asked: 'Mr. Panda Bear, why did you shoot the waiter? That's just not your nature!'. So then the panda said: 'Oh yes it is! Go look it up at the library!'. So they all went to the library and looked panda up in the encyclopedia. It said: 'Eats: shoots and leaves."
"Duh-duh duhn!" The drums sang.
Everyone started laughing and clapping. Bulma was silent, however. "I don't get it…"
"Well, Bulma," Yamcha said. "It's a category. The panda eats shoots and leaves. Bamboo shoots and leaves!"
"Oh, okay! Now I get it!" Bulma smiled. "Thank you, Yamcha!"
"Sure, Bulma…" Piccolo nudged him and Yamcha blushed.
"Okay," Krillin said. "A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink. Then the bartender looks at him and says: 'Hey, fella, why the long face?'!"
"Duh-duh duhn!" The drums rang.
Frieza cracked up laughing and fell off the couch. Everyone stared at him. (A/n: I don't know about Frieza, but every time I hear that joke, I just laugh at the stupidity of it.) Frieza got back up and wiped a tear from his eye. "Oh my gosh, that's a good one!"
"Um, right!" Krillin smiled. "And after this act, I'll be back with some more jokes! Now here are the "Five Saiyans", with "Bye bye bye"!"
Everyone clapped just to be nice and then the five Saiyans came back out, and stood there for a second. From right to left: Gohan, Goku, and Vegeta stood behind Goten and Trunks.
"Hey hey-ey-ey-ey! Bye bye bye!" Goku sang. All of the others echoed it. Everyone started clapping and hollering. They echoed again. The five Saiyans were dressed like *N Sync(proper placement?) in their music video "Bye Bye Bye". "Oh oh!"
"I!" They all sang.
"I'm doin this tonight!" Goku sang.
"You're!" They all sang.
"Prob'ly gonna start a fight!"
"I!"
"Know this can't be right! Hey, baby, come on!" Goku sang.
"I!"
"Loved you endlessly!"
"And!" They all said.
"You were left for me!"
"So!"
"Now it's time to leave and make it alo-one!" Goku sang.
"I know that I can't take no more! It ain't no lie-ie! I wanna see you out that door!" Now Goten and Trunks were singing.
"Baby, bye bye bye!" They all sang. They all started doing the movements. (A/n: Why did they start just now…?) So they sang through the chorus.
"You just hit me with the truth!" Now Gohan was singing.
"Now!" They all sang.
"Girl you're more than welcome to!" Gohan sang.
"So!"
"Give me one good reason to! Baby, come on!"
"I!"
"Live for you and me!"
"And!"
"Now I really come to see-ee!"
"That!"
"Life would be much better-er- once you're go-one!"
"I know that I can't take no more! It ain't no li-ie!" Goten and Trunks were signing again. "I-I wanna see you out that door!"
"Baby, bye bye bye!" They all sang. They went into the chorus again.
"I'm giving up I know for sure! Don't' wanna be the reason for your love no more!" They all sang. "Bye bye! I'm checkin out, I'm signin off!" Don't wanna be the loser and I've had enough!"
"Don't wanna be your fool in this game for two!" Vegeta sang. They all joined in:
"So I'm leavin- you- behind!"
"Bye bye bye!" Vegeta sang.
"I don't wanna make it tough!" Everyone but Vegeta sang.
"Make it tough!" Vegeta repeated.
"But I had enough!"
"Bye byyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyye!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Vegeta held it as they all sang:
"And it ain't no lie!"
"Babyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Vegeta sang.
"Whoo!" Bulma said. They all started clapping as the five Saiyans went into the chorus. But after they said: "Baby, bye bye bye", Trunks and Goten would sing: "Bye bye!" The repeated the chorus and the song finished off:
"Bye bye!" Goten and Trunks sang.
"YAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!" Marron started clapping along with the others. The five Saiyans bowed and left to go change.
"Doo doo doo DOO! Doo doo doo doo DOO!" The freak-o game show music started up again as Krillin walked out. (A/n: o.O)
"Thank you! Thank you! I'm Krillin the comedian, and I am here to entertain YOU!" Krillin held a hand out at the audience. No applause…AGAIN. Krillin clear his throat and straightened his bowtie. "Okay. A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender looks at him and asks: 'How are you going to pay for this?'. The duck responds: 'Just put it on my bill.'."
"Duh-duh duhn!" Everyone was silent. They all looked at Frieza, expecting him to laugh. "But that's one's not any good…"
"New joke!" Krillin exclaimed. There are five guys in an airplane caught in a jet stream: the pilot, the Smartest Guy in the World, a hippie, and two tourists. The only problem: there were four parachutes."
"So as they're all trying to figure out who should stay, one of the tourists says 'Well, I have a wife and two children. They need me!'. So they let the first tourist take a parachute, leaving three. So then the other tourist says: 'Well, I have a family to look after, too.'. so they let the tourist go." Krillin continued with his joke. "Now there are only two parachutes. So then the Smartest Guy in the World says: 'Well I'm the Smartest Guy in the World! The world needs me!'. So he takes a parachute-"
"NO!" Chi-Chi yelled. "Leave him on the plane!"
"SHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Continuing." Krillin said. "So the Smartest Guy in the World takes a parachute, so now there's only one left. So then the pilot says: 'Well, I'm the one who got us into this mess, so I'll go down with the plane.' The hippie shook his head and said: 'No way, man! The Smartest Guy in the World just jumped out with my backpack!'"
They all cracked up laughing and the five Saiyans returned to their spots on the couch, but in Goten and Trunks' case, the floor. Krillin smiled. "Okay. There are three men in a hot air balloon, trying to figure out how to decide where to build their houses. One had a golden arrow, another had a golden bullet, and the last one had a golden cannonball. So the one with the golden arrow says: 'Well, wherever this golden arrow lands is where I will build my house.'. So he shoots the arrow and goes down to find it. He found a little girl who was crying. He asked: 'Little girl, why are you crying?'. So then she responds: 'A golden arrow came down from out of the sky and popped my balloon'!"
"So then he adopts the little girl and builds his house where he found her." Krillin said. "So then the one with a golden bullet said: 'Wherever this bullet lands I will build my house.'. So he shoots the bullet and goes down to find where it landed. He found a little boy who was crying and he asked: 'Little boy, why are you crying?'."
"The little boy responds: 'This golden bullet came down from out of the sky and popped my balloon!'. So the man adopts the boy and builds his house where he found him. So then the third man said: 'Well, wherever this golden cannonball lands, I will build my house.'. So he shoots the cannonball and goes down to find where it landed. He found a little boy who was laughing and asked: 'Little boy, why are you laughing?'. So then the little boy responds: 'I farted and my house blew up'!"
"AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!" Trunks and Goten cracked up laughing. Everyone else was silent. Krillin shook his head.
"Whatever, I never liked that one much, anyway." Krillin said. Goten finally stopped laughing, but Trunks continued.
"Trunks, honey, breathe." Bulma said. Trunks gasped for air.
"Thanks, Mom."
"Trunks, you want me to tell another?" Krillin asked. "Or do you wanna just come up here and go on to the next act?
"Go ahead and do another if it's as funny as the last one!" Trunks exclaimed.
"Okay, then," Krillin straightened his bowtie again. "A man was once telling another: 'There are three kinds of people in the world. Those who can count, and those who can't."
Everyone but Goten laughed. "What's so funny? I don't get what's so funny about there being three kinds of people in the world…"
"Oh, that's right, he can't count." Krillin said. He smiled. "ANYWAY! You know a woman is going to say something smart when she begins her sentence with 'A man once told me'."
All of the men (except Goten and Trunks) cracked up laughing and the women glared at Krillin. "Hey!"
Krillin smiled nervously. "Right… Anyway, a kindergarten-aged little girl comes home and says to her mother: 'Mommy, we learned how to make babies in school today!'. The mother nearly drops the plate she is drying, put quickly regains her composure. She then asks: 'Oh really? How do you make babies?'."
"'You replace the 'y' with an 'i' and add 'es'!'" They all started laughing.
"Mom would freak out if I told her that…" Gohan said, looking at Chi-Chi. Chi-Chi laughed nervously.
"Okay, then, that's it for Krillin's act!" Trunks exclaimed, jumping up. Trunks straightened his bowtie and pulled an index card from his vest pocket. He read it over and quickly put it back. "Next up is Videl and her juggling act! After that we will have a… DIFFERENT kind of performance by Goku and Vegeta!"
Goku and Vegeta ran off to change and Videl stood up. She bowed and Gohan clapped. "Yayyyyyy!"
"Okay!" Videl started juggling the five green bean bags around. She lost one of them and it hit the wall. She continued juggling, determined on juggling at least four. Another one went flying and almost hit Chi-Chi.
"Better be careful, Videl, or she won't let you marry Gohan…!" Eighteen teased. Videl and Gohan blushed and Videl continued juggling. She was sure she could juggle three!
"Oh, shi-" Another one went flying and it hit Gohan in the forehead. Gohan was knocked unconscious, making Videl and Chi-Chi scream. The two rushed over to him and Trunks cleared his throat. Everyone but Chi-Chi and Videl looked back at Trunks. Trunks noticed that he needed to straighten his bowtie again and blushed.
"How come I have to wear this stupid tux, anyway…?" Trunks thought. Trunks straightened his bowtie and scratched the back of his head as he looked at the index card. "Goku and Vegeta will be doing- Huh…? What's the word…?" Bulma rushed over to him and whispered something in his ear. "Oh! Thanks, Mom!" Bulma sat back down and Trunks cleared his throat. "Now for our ninth act-"
"Actually, it's the tenth," Frieza said. "I'm not the list, remember? I was just a last minute sign-up."
"Oh, right." Trunks nodded. "Now, our tenth act, ladies and gentlemen: DISCOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
The lights faded, Krillin plugged in the disco ball, and Goku and Vegeta came out in their normal outfits, only their normal outfits were pure white. Goku started doing the pointy thingy, (A/n: WHAT DO YOU CALL IT!!!!!!!?????) and Vegeta just stood there, glaring at them all, arms crossed. The music struck a note and Vegeta did the splits.
"WHOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!" Everyone clapped. Vegeta used his hands to push off the ground, coming back up and looking like he was in pain. Frieza looked disgusted.
"NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" The two stopped. "YOU'RE DOING IT *ALL* WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Frieza stood up and stood in-between Goku and Vegeta. "Restart the music!" The music started and Frieza grinned.
Frieza pointed to his left with both hands, looking like they were a gun, and winked with his left eye. He then threw his hands over to point to the right, and he winked with his right eye. He did this a few times, then did a back flip and landed, doing the splits. Everyone started clapping, even Goku and Vegeta.
Frieza jumped back up, without using his hands like Vegeta did, and pointed up at the ceiling with the index finger on both hands. He pointed at the ground with his left hand at his hip, and took his right hand and started going from his hip (pointing at the ground), and then extended it (pointing at the ceiling)(A/n: in other words, the same thing Goku was doing). He did this a few more times, pointed outwards in both ways, and then he started sliding backwards, bobbing his head forward, then realigning it with his spine (A/n: my ex's bro could do that REALLY well).
Frieza turned and slid backwards in the other direction. He did a back flip and landed, pointing at the ceiling. The music cut off and everyone clapped. Frieza bowed as roses were thrown at him from out of nowhere. "Thank you! Thank you!"
"Hey, guys!" Krillin exclaimed. "Frieza's the King of Disco!"
"Whoo-hoo!"
"Alright!"
"O' King of Disco, please teacheth me to Disco as you do!" Yamcha recited.
"TOUCH MY HAND!!!!!!!!!! TOUCH MY HAND!!!!!!!!!!" Videl screamed. She cracked up laughing. "It's too funny!!!!!!"
"No it's NOT…" Gohan said, crossing his arms.
Well, I think that the FHI Talent Show was a success, don't you? In the next chapter, everyone goes to the beach! Will everyone have a good time? Will Gohan surf a pipewave? Find out next time, on FHI: To the Beach!