TITLE: Playing for Keeps (2/5)
AUTHOR: Kansas J. Miller
PAIRING: CJ/Charlie
RATING: PG-13
SPOILERS: "20 Hours in America"
DISCLAIMER: CJ, Charlie and all of the "West Wing" character belong to Aaron Sorkin. Clearly, 'cause I doubt he'd be having them do this.
AUTHOR NOTE: This is chapter two out of five, picking up a couple of weeks after the last part. Thank you again to Rhonda for your ideas and solutions. Thank you, as well, to those who have reviewed my story ! It's greatly appreciated.
~Kansas
~*~
"I can probably fit the last of it into this one," CJ decided, crouching to the floor in order to rearrange the contents of the large cardboard box. When the task was complete, CJ looked up triumphantly. "Didn't I tell you?"
"Yes, CJ," Deanna laughed dramatically, "you are a master packer."
Taking her hand, Deanna pulled CJ off of the floor. With nothing but suitcases and boxes remaining in the younger woman's room, the two headed to the kitchen for a drink after hours of work.
The apartment was small and modest, but now that Deanna was leaving for the University of Virginia, CJ saw that Charlie would have more space to himself. It had been a pleasure helping Deanna put her things together; when Charlie had mentioned the upcoming task, CJ had readily volunteered.
"You nervous about tomorrow?" CJ asked, sipping the Pepsi that Deanna had offered.
Deanna leaned against the counter next to where CJ stood. Their heights were comparable, and Deanna easily looked CJ in the eye as she shrugged. "I already know the basketball team, and I'll be too busy to worry."
"The transition from high school to college was tough for me," CJ commented, instantly realizing just how long ago that was.
Deanna shrugged again, her face still calm. "I've done harder things than this."
CJ nodded, understanding the reference. For a few weeks now, CJ had been slowly opening up to Charlie. He'd told her stories about how he and Deanna had dealt with their mother's death and in turn, CJ had vented some of her emotion towards Simon. It had surprised CJ just how much lay beneath Charlie's surface, and she had to grudgingly admit that talking out her feelings with him was helpful.
"You know, CJ, my brother told me what you've been going through," Deanna said cocking her head towards the older woman.
CJ cleared her throat and put the soda down. "Yeah, Charlie's been a really great friend lately."
"Charlie understands. I understand, too, and trust me it eventually gets a little easier," Deanna continued, her smile soft.
"Well, it's not like Simon was as close to me as your mother was to you.it's a little different, but-"
Deanna interrupted with a snort. "Even if you barely knew the guy, it's an impossible thing to deal with."
"Yeah," CJ agreed quietly, pursing her lips as she stared down at the countertop.
They finished the drinks together in silence. After the glasses were in the sink, Deanna pointed towards a hallway. "I was cleaning out the closets last week. I want to show you what I found."
They entered a small bedroom, one that appeared to be used for miscellaneous deposit. A junk room, CJ smiled, she had one of her own. Deanna kneeled down and pulled a box out from under the bed, rooted through it for a moment and held up a photograph.
Sitting down on the floor beside Deanna, CJ took a look. "Oh, Deanna, that's so sweet!"
Deanna smiled. "It's Charlie and my mom. He was about five when this was taken. Look at my mother, wasn't she beautiful?"
Yes," CJ agreed, taking the photo out of Deanna's hand. Not only was the late policewoman beautiful, but the smiling, happy expression on Charlie's cute face made a twinge in CJ's heart. He was such an adorable little boy.
"Can I take this?" she asked suddenly. "I'd like to put it in a frame for Charlie. He's been so.so great lately."
Deanna nodded, still smiling. "Charlie really likes you."
CJ stood up, smiled at Deanna for a moment and then nodded. Charlie really liked her? How so? What did that mean? CJ quickly decided it was nothing at all, and she held onto the photo. "I have to get going. But good luck tomorrow. Send me some e-mail; let me know how it is."
The women quickly embraced. Deanna was grateful for the help and the company. "Thanks so much, CJ."
~*~
Charlie slammed shut the door of the limo just as the wheels began to roll. Clutching folders filled with paper that threatened to fall loose, Charlie attempted to neaten his work but the rough bumping of the car along the gravel road made the job impossible. As the folder fell to the padded limo floor, Charlie sighed, bent down, and found himself head to head with CJ.
"Thanks," he smiled, taking the unruly stack from her hands.
"You're welcome," she grinned, slowly leaning back against the seat. Charlie himself settled into the leather and let his eyes rest on CJ. The line of her jaw was angular as she sat with her head turned, staring out the window, watching as Indiana rolled by. They were the only two in the car, and briefly Josh and Toby's whereabouts crossed Charlie's mind. Figuring that they had hopped into another car in the long motorcade, Charlie went back to watching CJ.
She looked more pensive than she had in days, but it might also have been exhaustion; the plane had left Andrews at an ungodly hour, and though it was already past eleven o'clock, Charlie knew it wouldn't take much for either of them to fall asleep.
CJ was looking at the flat fields of corn as the motorcade flew by, but she wasn't really seeing much of the landscape. Her mind was wandering over so many things; the President, the campaign, what she was going to do about Anthony Marcus.
It had been Charlie's influence that had taken CJ back to Simon's little brother. Charlie had given good advice-instead of wallowing in the sadness or the pain, he told CJ to put her energy into something positive. It had worked for Charlie when his mother had died, and it could work for CJ now.
CJ hadn't mentioned it to Charlie, but in the past few weeks, spending time with Anthony had been her attempt at staving off the negativity. But just like her fledgling relationship with Simon, this endeavor too had backfired in CJ's face. Anthony couldn't stand her, and now he needed a Big Brother in order to stay out of juvenile detention. Determined not to let discouragement get in the way of helping the boy, CJ was intent on finding someone to spend some time with Anthony in her place.
She really didn't take Anthony's actions personally-he was young and going through some hard things. He wasn't a bad kid, he just needed someone who could reach him, someone like Simon.
Sighing, CJ turned her head away from the window. There were dozens of men working in the West Wing that CJ could ask for help, and though Charlie was the first on her list, CJ found herself reluctant to try. This was the kind of time-consuming thing that no one really had the time for, no matter their good heart. And Charlie had already spent so much time being kind to CJ in recent days.
"CJ?" Charlie was asking, his hand reaching across the car to touch her arm. "Your cell is ringing."
Snapping out of her thoughts, CJ shook her head and sighed. "CJ Cregg."
As CJ spoke on the phone, Charlie inconspicuously continued to watch her features. It was almost getting on his nerves, the way that CJ seemed to attract his eyes. It was annoying and more than a little bit out of line, Charlie smirked to himself; CJ wasn't supposed to be at all attractive. But when she had begun to open up to him and talk about her feelings, it had made CJ seem all the more real, all the more interesting and magnetic. Inside, Charlie knew there was a thin line developing between the feelings of friendship and the surely one-sided attraction he had for CJ.
With a deep breath, Charlie leaned his head back against the seat, closed his eyes, and let both the sound of CJ's voice and the rhythm of the car lull him into a doze.
~*~
It had not been a good night. Pipe bombings and the President's speech had set off a gamut of emotions in all of the Senior Staff, and as Charlie headed through the West Wing, he wished he had said yes to CJ.
She had approached him on the plane about helping out Anthony, and instinctively he had said no, greedy with his free time. CJ had seemed almost desperate to find someone for the boy; her wide eyes and shy, softer than usual smile had given it away. It was the same expression CJ often took on when she would talk about something personal; it was an expression Charlie had never seen on this woman until just last month.
Charlie thought he might make a good Big Brother, but there was always a fear of failure in taking on a new challenge. And more likely than not, CJ would find someone better and more qualified than he. The thought did nothing to lessen the slight guilt he felt, and as Charlie walked into the bullpen, he was a bit surprised to see CJ standing there with Anthony.
It happened so quickly, and when she heard the words come angrily out of Anthony's mouth, CJ forced herself not to be hurt by it. Thoughts whirled through her head as her hand flew to her chest in apology; Anthony was just a kid, he didn't really mean it-he was just angry, and everyone had a right to be angry-
Shocked, as suddenly Charlie was slamming Anthony into the wall, CJ froze feeling naked in the white gown she wore. With a ball of nerves tight in her stomach, she barely heard the words of first defense and then of tough criticism that came out of Charlie's mouth. She hadn't even noticed him walk into the area, and now he was smacking down Anthony with a force that CJ had never figured could reach the boy.
Stunned as Charlie made his offer to Anthony and then coolly stalked out of the room, CJ felt her mouth fall open. Charlie had just fixed her dilemma, if only Anthony would accept.
~*~
Charlie found his way back to his desk a good twenty minutes after his encounter with CJ and Anthony. After splashing cold water on his face, it had taken Charlie exactly three seconds to understand why he'd done what he'd done.
Sure, there was merit to guiding a troubled kid and in the heat of the moment, Charlie knew that offering so was the only way to punctuate his point: disrespecting someone in a position of power just wouldn't do.
But it was more personal than that; when Charlie had heard the ugly, malicious tone with which Anthony mixed his foul language, there had been no thoughts in his head except of CJ. No one was allowed to talk to her like that, especially not a punk like Anthony. Charlie's defensive action had been born out of his growing feelings for CJ, and as he continued to mull it over, Charlie tried to tell himself it wasn't so.
The box on his desk wrapped with a blue ribbon caught Charlie's attention, and as he unwrapped it, he saw CJ out of the corner of his eye. She was back from taking Anthony home, now leaning against his doorframe in her glittering white gown.
"The picture's from Deanna. I just put it in a frame-I've had it in my office for about a week, I just keep forgetting to give it to you."
"Thanks. It's nice," Charlie smiled, his eyes lingering on hers for a moment. CJ was feeling grateful for what he'd just done, for what he'd been doing for her. And he was feeling.something else.
"Have a good night," she offered with another soft smile, turning and walking down the hall before Charlie could say another word.
He was touched by the gesture; it was a picture of his mother that he hadn't seen in a long time, if ever. CJ had heard Charlie's stories and clearly his advice had prompted her to try move out of her slump, but Charlie couldn't help but wish something deeper was underneath the surface.
CJ walked slowly back to her office for a last minute message check. There had been no reason to come back to the White House, but she'd wanted to see if Charlie had found her gift.
The timing had been perfect, and the way he had smiled at her did not go unnoticed. What it meant, however, was lost on CJ as she headed out through the lobby. She and Charlie had grown closer in their friendship, but something slight and unprofessional kept tugging at her proverbial sleeve; it was something CJ knew she'd have to ignore before it could have the chance grow. *
AUTHOR: Kansas J. Miller
PAIRING: CJ/Charlie
RATING: PG-13
SPOILERS: "20 Hours in America"
DISCLAIMER: CJ, Charlie and all of the "West Wing" character belong to Aaron Sorkin. Clearly, 'cause I doubt he'd be having them do this.
AUTHOR NOTE: This is chapter two out of five, picking up a couple of weeks after the last part. Thank you again to Rhonda for your ideas and solutions. Thank you, as well, to those who have reviewed my story ! It's greatly appreciated.
~Kansas
~*~
"I can probably fit the last of it into this one," CJ decided, crouching to the floor in order to rearrange the contents of the large cardboard box. When the task was complete, CJ looked up triumphantly. "Didn't I tell you?"
"Yes, CJ," Deanna laughed dramatically, "you are a master packer."
Taking her hand, Deanna pulled CJ off of the floor. With nothing but suitcases and boxes remaining in the younger woman's room, the two headed to the kitchen for a drink after hours of work.
The apartment was small and modest, but now that Deanna was leaving for the University of Virginia, CJ saw that Charlie would have more space to himself. It had been a pleasure helping Deanna put her things together; when Charlie had mentioned the upcoming task, CJ had readily volunteered.
"You nervous about tomorrow?" CJ asked, sipping the Pepsi that Deanna had offered.
Deanna leaned against the counter next to where CJ stood. Their heights were comparable, and Deanna easily looked CJ in the eye as she shrugged. "I already know the basketball team, and I'll be too busy to worry."
"The transition from high school to college was tough for me," CJ commented, instantly realizing just how long ago that was.
Deanna shrugged again, her face still calm. "I've done harder things than this."
CJ nodded, understanding the reference. For a few weeks now, CJ had been slowly opening up to Charlie. He'd told her stories about how he and Deanna had dealt with their mother's death and in turn, CJ had vented some of her emotion towards Simon. It had surprised CJ just how much lay beneath Charlie's surface, and she had to grudgingly admit that talking out her feelings with him was helpful.
"You know, CJ, my brother told me what you've been going through," Deanna said cocking her head towards the older woman.
CJ cleared her throat and put the soda down. "Yeah, Charlie's been a really great friend lately."
"Charlie understands. I understand, too, and trust me it eventually gets a little easier," Deanna continued, her smile soft.
"Well, it's not like Simon was as close to me as your mother was to you.it's a little different, but-"
Deanna interrupted with a snort. "Even if you barely knew the guy, it's an impossible thing to deal with."
"Yeah," CJ agreed quietly, pursing her lips as she stared down at the countertop.
They finished the drinks together in silence. After the glasses were in the sink, Deanna pointed towards a hallway. "I was cleaning out the closets last week. I want to show you what I found."
They entered a small bedroom, one that appeared to be used for miscellaneous deposit. A junk room, CJ smiled, she had one of her own. Deanna kneeled down and pulled a box out from under the bed, rooted through it for a moment and held up a photograph.
Sitting down on the floor beside Deanna, CJ took a look. "Oh, Deanna, that's so sweet!"
Deanna smiled. "It's Charlie and my mom. He was about five when this was taken. Look at my mother, wasn't she beautiful?"
Yes," CJ agreed, taking the photo out of Deanna's hand. Not only was the late policewoman beautiful, but the smiling, happy expression on Charlie's cute face made a twinge in CJ's heart. He was such an adorable little boy.
"Can I take this?" she asked suddenly. "I'd like to put it in a frame for Charlie. He's been so.so great lately."
Deanna nodded, still smiling. "Charlie really likes you."
CJ stood up, smiled at Deanna for a moment and then nodded. Charlie really liked her? How so? What did that mean? CJ quickly decided it was nothing at all, and she held onto the photo. "I have to get going. But good luck tomorrow. Send me some e-mail; let me know how it is."
The women quickly embraced. Deanna was grateful for the help and the company. "Thanks so much, CJ."
~*~
Charlie slammed shut the door of the limo just as the wheels began to roll. Clutching folders filled with paper that threatened to fall loose, Charlie attempted to neaten his work but the rough bumping of the car along the gravel road made the job impossible. As the folder fell to the padded limo floor, Charlie sighed, bent down, and found himself head to head with CJ.
"Thanks," he smiled, taking the unruly stack from her hands.
"You're welcome," she grinned, slowly leaning back against the seat. Charlie himself settled into the leather and let his eyes rest on CJ. The line of her jaw was angular as she sat with her head turned, staring out the window, watching as Indiana rolled by. They were the only two in the car, and briefly Josh and Toby's whereabouts crossed Charlie's mind. Figuring that they had hopped into another car in the long motorcade, Charlie went back to watching CJ.
She looked more pensive than she had in days, but it might also have been exhaustion; the plane had left Andrews at an ungodly hour, and though it was already past eleven o'clock, Charlie knew it wouldn't take much for either of them to fall asleep.
CJ was looking at the flat fields of corn as the motorcade flew by, but she wasn't really seeing much of the landscape. Her mind was wandering over so many things; the President, the campaign, what she was going to do about Anthony Marcus.
It had been Charlie's influence that had taken CJ back to Simon's little brother. Charlie had given good advice-instead of wallowing in the sadness or the pain, he told CJ to put her energy into something positive. It had worked for Charlie when his mother had died, and it could work for CJ now.
CJ hadn't mentioned it to Charlie, but in the past few weeks, spending time with Anthony had been her attempt at staving off the negativity. But just like her fledgling relationship with Simon, this endeavor too had backfired in CJ's face. Anthony couldn't stand her, and now he needed a Big Brother in order to stay out of juvenile detention. Determined not to let discouragement get in the way of helping the boy, CJ was intent on finding someone to spend some time with Anthony in her place.
She really didn't take Anthony's actions personally-he was young and going through some hard things. He wasn't a bad kid, he just needed someone who could reach him, someone like Simon.
Sighing, CJ turned her head away from the window. There were dozens of men working in the West Wing that CJ could ask for help, and though Charlie was the first on her list, CJ found herself reluctant to try. This was the kind of time-consuming thing that no one really had the time for, no matter their good heart. And Charlie had already spent so much time being kind to CJ in recent days.
"CJ?" Charlie was asking, his hand reaching across the car to touch her arm. "Your cell is ringing."
Snapping out of her thoughts, CJ shook her head and sighed. "CJ Cregg."
As CJ spoke on the phone, Charlie inconspicuously continued to watch her features. It was almost getting on his nerves, the way that CJ seemed to attract his eyes. It was annoying and more than a little bit out of line, Charlie smirked to himself; CJ wasn't supposed to be at all attractive. But when she had begun to open up to him and talk about her feelings, it had made CJ seem all the more real, all the more interesting and magnetic. Inside, Charlie knew there was a thin line developing between the feelings of friendship and the surely one-sided attraction he had for CJ.
With a deep breath, Charlie leaned his head back against the seat, closed his eyes, and let both the sound of CJ's voice and the rhythm of the car lull him into a doze.
~*~
It had not been a good night. Pipe bombings and the President's speech had set off a gamut of emotions in all of the Senior Staff, and as Charlie headed through the West Wing, he wished he had said yes to CJ.
She had approached him on the plane about helping out Anthony, and instinctively he had said no, greedy with his free time. CJ had seemed almost desperate to find someone for the boy; her wide eyes and shy, softer than usual smile had given it away. It was the same expression CJ often took on when she would talk about something personal; it was an expression Charlie had never seen on this woman until just last month.
Charlie thought he might make a good Big Brother, but there was always a fear of failure in taking on a new challenge. And more likely than not, CJ would find someone better and more qualified than he. The thought did nothing to lessen the slight guilt he felt, and as Charlie walked into the bullpen, he was a bit surprised to see CJ standing there with Anthony.
It happened so quickly, and when she heard the words come angrily out of Anthony's mouth, CJ forced herself not to be hurt by it. Thoughts whirled through her head as her hand flew to her chest in apology; Anthony was just a kid, he didn't really mean it-he was just angry, and everyone had a right to be angry-
Shocked, as suddenly Charlie was slamming Anthony into the wall, CJ froze feeling naked in the white gown she wore. With a ball of nerves tight in her stomach, she barely heard the words of first defense and then of tough criticism that came out of Charlie's mouth. She hadn't even noticed him walk into the area, and now he was smacking down Anthony with a force that CJ had never figured could reach the boy.
Stunned as Charlie made his offer to Anthony and then coolly stalked out of the room, CJ felt her mouth fall open. Charlie had just fixed her dilemma, if only Anthony would accept.
~*~
Charlie found his way back to his desk a good twenty minutes after his encounter with CJ and Anthony. After splashing cold water on his face, it had taken Charlie exactly three seconds to understand why he'd done what he'd done.
Sure, there was merit to guiding a troubled kid and in the heat of the moment, Charlie knew that offering so was the only way to punctuate his point: disrespecting someone in a position of power just wouldn't do.
But it was more personal than that; when Charlie had heard the ugly, malicious tone with which Anthony mixed his foul language, there had been no thoughts in his head except of CJ. No one was allowed to talk to her like that, especially not a punk like Anthony. Charlie's defensive action had been born out of his growing feelings for CJ, and as he continued to mull it over, Charlie tried to tell himself it wasn't so.
The box on his desk wrapped with a blue ribbon caught Charlie's attention, and as he unwrapped it, he saw CJ out of the corner of his eye. She was back from taking Anthony home, now leaning against his doorframe in her glittering white gown.
"The picture's from Deanna. I just put it in a frame-I've had it in my office for about a week, I just keep forgetting to give it to you."
"Thanks. It's nice," Charlie smiled, his eyes lingering on hers for a moment. CJ was feeling grateful for what he'd just done, for what he'd been doing for her. And he was feeling.something else.
"Have a good night," she offered with another soft smile, turning and walking down the hall before Charlie could say another word.
He was touched by the gesture; it was a picture of his mother that he hadn't seen in a long time, if ever. CJ had heard Charlie's stories and clearly his advice had prompted her to try move out of her slump, but Charlie couldn't help but wish something deeper was underneath the surface.
CJ walked slowly back to her office for a last minute message check. There had been no reason to come back to the White House, but she'd wanted to see if Charlie had found her gift.
The timing had been perfect, and the way he had smiled at her did not go unnoticed. What it meant, however, was lost on CJ as she headed out through the lobby. She and Charlie had grown closer in their friendship, but something slight and unprofessional kept tugging at her proverbial sleeve; it was something CJ knew she'd have to ignore before it could have the chance grow. *