TEN: AND THEY SAY JACKIE CHAN ISN'T A SERIOUS ACTOR
====
Important Dedication:
Ha, you think I've forgotten all you people who wrote reviews? Thanks for everything, I luvvvv you. This one is for:
Vonda, Lady-of-the-flame, Your Worshipfulness, Oregano, ScoobyGal55, Briana, Circlesky, EyEzOnLy, Angeleyez, jewls13, Leigh, melia, Crystal, giggleboxsam, Madison, NYMetsGirl1986, Bull, Len, bina, Jedi Prophetess, maddie, Jedi Slayer Kimmy, Melissa Larkin, GGFAN, Knight Maria, Leigh, Lubysrock, clever-lazy, Madison Faye, blondee, Mayhem, Mysterious Siren, Barb, KT-Beth, Karen Murray, firegoddess1014, otownroxx, crazy-dreams, Lana, ev, likethat, tanub, Nicole
Special Gold Stars for reviewing multiple times! :
ScoobyGal55, Angeleyez, jewls13, Your Worshipfulness, melia, maddie, Leigh, Melissa Larkin, Bull, clever-lazy, firegoddess1014, Knight_Maria, otownroxx, blondee, EyEzOnLy, Jedi Prophetess.
Extra Special Dedication:
To me, because I rock, I'm special, and I love myself. Why can't I dedicate something to myself? Like Whitney Houston said, learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all. So there.
And a special, one time offer :
The next fifty reviewers will receive a very special "Luke Loves Lorelai" straightjacket, available in sea green, shocking pink, and sky blue. Just because you're insane, doesn't mean you can't look stylish.
Now, back to our show.
====
"Done," said Lorelai, wiping the corners of her mouth with a serviette. She hammered her mug on the counter lightly. "Refill."
"I think you've had just about enough for tonight," Luke said, hanging the dishcloth over his shoulder once he was done wiping the tables. "You won't be able to sleep with all that caffeine pumping through your veins."
"Okay, clearly you have just met me," said Lorelai, "My body does not work like conventional human bodies. Refill, please."
"I'm all out of coffee. Sorry."
"There's a big pot right over there."
"That's decaf."
"Liar," Lorelai answered, "Refill. And hurry, my mouth's getting dry."
"When it finally kills you," Luke reached out for the coffee pot and filled her mug, "Don't say I didn't warn you."
"Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I remember you saying something about pie earlier. Where is that?"
"You didn't finish your bagel, you didn't finish your muffin, what on earth makes you think that I'm going to give you pie? If I wanted to waste food I would throw it at Taylor."
"I'm hungry."
"Well, eat the bagel," Luke pushed the plate with Lorelai's uneaten bagel on it, "Or the muffin. If you're really hungry, go crazy, eat both."
"Don't be mean," said Lorelai, "I spent the entire day thinking about your pie, and now you're not going to let me have even a nibble? Oooh, that sounded less naughty in my head."
Luke sighed. "You're only going to waste it."
"You're just going to throw it out anyway," said Lorelai, "Because I don't think you should be serving day old pie."
"Maybe I want to give it to a homeless person."
"There are no homeless people in Stars Hollow."
"Then maybe I want to drive to Hartford and feed some homeless people there."
"You would drive all the way there just so I won't get the pie? How vindictive is that?" Lorelai said. "Well, let me tell you something, vindictiveness is the cornerstone of anger, which in itself is one of the seven deadly sins… so there."
"So is gluttony."
"What exactly is your point?"
"Just take the damn pie," Luke gave in. He cut her a slice and put it on her plate. "And make sure you finish it."
"Ha ha," Lorelai laughed, "You have no backbone whatsoever. You're like Spongebob Squarepants, only without the charming geometrical body shape."
"Do you want the pie or not? Because I could take it away anytime."
"Maybe you are unaware about a little thing I like to call charity," said Lorelai, "Which states, one should give unto those less fortunate, and not threaten to take away the things which one gives away just because the less fortunate happen to make a few comments which one does not like."
"Well, you've summed up the concept of charity well."
"I know. You should go to church more often. I hear they teach you all sorts of fun things like this," said Lorelai.
"I'm sure, somewhere a priest is smiling."
"You know," said Lorelai, after taking another huge bite of her pie. "When I was younger, I wanted to marry a priest. Do you want to know why?"
"If I said no, would it stop you from telling me anyways?"
"No, it wouldn't," said Lorelai. "You see, back then, I thought marrying a priest was my ticket to heaven. Because, once we were married, I could do whatever I like, and there's no way I'm going to hell, because if I went to hell, my priest husband would be sad, because obviously he would be going to heaven, and we would be separated. It would be like punishing him, and that would be wrong, because he's a priest and you don't punish priests in the afterlife. So I thought, if I married a priest, I would be pretty set for life."
"Do you listen to yourself when you talk?"
"Of course, eventually, someone sat me down and told me that you cannot marry your way into God's kingdom, which left me looking for Plan B," said Lorelai. "Ah, the foibles of youth. I need to be young again."
"I think you need a fast acting sedative," said Luke, "Are you done with your pie? I'm closing up soon."
"Done," said Lorelai, licking the fork and pushing her plate forward to Luke for inspection. "And if you examine it properly, you will see that I did not waste your pie. Once again, you have been proven wrong."
"Good," said Luke, taking the plate from her and washing it in the sink behind. "Although I'm surprised that bottomless pit of a stomach could squeeze in another piece of pie so late at night."
"The wonders of the human body," said Lorelai, getting up. She took out her purse. "How much do I owe you?"
"Forget about it," said Luke, drying his hands on a cloth hanging by the sink. "I don't charge customers for day old pie. Or for uneaten bagels and muffins, for that matter."
"Thank you, sir," said Lorelai, putting back her purse. "So, I'll see you tomorrow? I'll be the one salivating over your coffee."
She turned to go as Luke walked out from behind the counter. "I'll walk you home."
"It's okay, you don't have to," said Lorelai. "You probably have to lock up and everything."
"It's no big deal," Luke answered, as he followed her out of the diner. "I can do that later when I get back."
"Okay."
*
"So, our friend Jackie Chan was in the newspapers again," said Lorelai, as they walked up the porch steps. "Apparently he's frustrated that nobody considers him to be a serious actor."
"Now, that is surprising. Especially after his riveting performance in Rush Hour."
"You don't have to be sarcastic," said Lorelai, "And I happen to think that there are a few things we could learn from Mr. Chan."
"Yeah, like violence is an answer to everything."
"No, but right now I must admit it does look like an appealing course of action," said Lorelai. "Jackie Chan is the champion of the underdog; he teaches us to value action over words, to take a chance and not be afraid of the consequences. That is respectable."
"You haven't been drinking your perfume again, have you?"
"No, you know I only did that the one time," said Lorelai, "And let me tell you, again, that it is still perfectly normal to wonder whether anything that smells good, would also taste equally as good."
The front door opened, and Rory stepped out. "Oh, hi."
"Where are you going?" asked Lorelai, looking at her watch. "It's late."
"Dean called me," said Rory, "We're heading over to the lake to sit and talk and look at the stars. I hear it's a very romantic thing to do."
"It's late," Lorelai said, "I don't want you roaming all over town at night. Who knows what kind of psychopaths are out there?"
"Mom," Rory sighed, "It's Stars Hollow. The closest person we have to a psychopath is Miss Patty, and even she is just mildly threatening."
"To you, maybe," muttered Luke under his breath.
"We're just going to the lake," said Rory, "We won't be long. It's not like we're going to do anything illegal or something morally frowned upon."
"Well, you can do that here, can't you?" Lorelai said.
"We want to look at the lake."
"You want to look at the lake," Lorelai repeated.
"Yes."
"Just the lake."
"Just the lake," Rory confirmed.
"So, since you just want to look at the lake," said Lorelai, "You wouldn't mind if you and Dean stayed here, while I go out and take a Polaroid of the lake, and then give it to the two of you to look at in my living room."
"You can't go to the lake alone," Rory challenged. "It's late, and there are psychopaths. You said so yourself."
"I won't go alone," said Lorelai. "I'll take Luke."
"Excuse me?" Luke spoke. Lorelai and Rory decided it was best to ignore him.
"You're doing the exact same thing you don't want me to do," said Rory.
"Well, hello, that is a parent's job. Didn't you see 'Road to Perdition'?" Lorelai said.
"Mom…"
"Heh, okay," said Lorelai, "I'm done messing with you now. You can go. Just don't come back too late, and try not to drown. Our community tends to disapprove of parents who send their children to a watery grave."
"I'll try my best," said Rory, as she ran down the steps. "I'll see you later. Bye, Luke."
"That conversation could have been much shorter," said Luke.
"I know," said Lorelai, "But where's the fun in that? Hey, you want to come in for a while? I have an assorted array of water available. Tap water, bottled water, ice water – that's both cubed and crushed , by the way - warm water, hot water, the list goes on. I'm like a freaking bar."
"Thanks, but it's kind of late," said Luke, "And besides, I don't want your neighbors to get the wrong idea. I can see Babette staring out through her blinds over there."
"Well, I don't really blame her. Ever since Cinammon passed on, her social life has really gone downhill," said Lorelai. "Want to show her something worth seeing?"
She walked up close to him until their bodies were just inches apart. She looked up at Luke; from the right angle it could easily be misconstrued that the both of them were sharing an intimate moment.
'What are you doing?', the rational part of her mind screamed, but Lorelai couldn't hear it. She didn't know what she was doing , or why she did it, but she just felt that it was something she wanted to do. She couldn't understand it herself, but she guessed Rory would figure out an explanation for her later.
Luke looked at her, into her eyes. He was getting nervous, his heart was beating and his palms were beginning to sweat. He had been close to her before, physically, but this time it seemed different. There was something else there. He swallowed and fidgeted, putting his hands in his pockets and then taking them out. His usually gruff voice was somewhat strained: "You know, the whole town's going to go crazy if she tells them."
"So?"
"Lorelai?"
"Yeah?"
"What you said earlier … about action over words, and taking chances. Do you really believe in that?"
"I guess so," she said, "If it's the right action. And the right chance. Why?"
"Nothing, I just …" He stopped himself short, and leaned down.
He pressed his lips gently against hers, and kissed her.
Lorelai didn't object to that.
* *
to be continued
* *
I'm thinking of posting the next part in March 2004. What do you think? Haha… no, I'm not that wicked . . . or am I?
====
Important Dedication:
Ha, you think I've forgotten all you people who wrote reviews? Thanks for everything, I luvvvv you. This one is for:
Vonda, Lady-of-the-flame, Your Worshipfulness, Oregano, ScoobyGal55, Briana, Circlesky, EyEzOnLy, Angeleyez, jewls13, Leigh, melia, Crystal, giggleboxsam, Madison, NYMetsGirl1986, Bull, Len, bina, Jedi Prophetess, maddie, Jedi Slayer Kimmy, Melissa Larkin, GGFAN, Knight Maria, Leigh, Lubysrock, clever-lazy, Madison Faye, blondee, Mayhem, Mysterious Siren, Barb, KT-Beth, Karen Murray, firegoddess1014, otownroxx, crazy-dreams, Lana, ev, likethat, tanub, Nicole
Special Gold Stars for reviewing multiple times! :
ScoobyGal55, Angeleyez, jewls13, Your Worshipfulness, melia, maddie, Leigh, Melissa Larkin, Bull, clever-lazy, firegoddess1014, Knight_Maria, otownroxx, blondee, EyEzOnLy, Jedi Prophetess.
Extra Special Dedication:
To me, because I rock, I'm special, and I love myself. Why can't I dedicate something to myself? Like Whitney Houston said, learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all. So there.
And a special, one time offer :
The next fifty reviewers will receive a very special "Luke Loves Lorelai" straightjacket, available in sea green, shocking pink, and sky blue. Just because you're insane, doesn't mean you can't look stylish.
Now, back to our show.
====
"Done," said Lorelai, wiping the corners of her mouth with a serviette. She hammered her mug on the counter lightly. "Refill."
"I think you've had just about enough for tonight," Luke said, hanging the dishcloth over his shoulder once he was done wiping the tables. "You won't be able to sleep with all that caffeine pumping through your veins."
"Okay, clearly you have just met me," said Lorelai, "My body does not work like conventional human bodies. Refill, please."
"I'm all out of coffee. Sorry."
"There's a big pot right over there."
"That's decaf."
"Liar," Lorelai answered, "Refill. And hurry, my mouth's getting dry."
"When it finally kills you," Luke reached out for the coffee pot and filled her mug, "Don't say I didn't warn you."
"Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I remember you saying something about pie earlier. Where is that?"
"You didn't finish your bagel, you didn't finish your muffin, what on earth makes you think that I'm going to give you pie? If I wanted to waste food I would throw it at Taylor."
"I'm hungry."
"Well, eat the bagel," Luke pushed the plate with Lorelai's uneaten bagel on it, "Or the muffin. If you're really hungry, go crazy, eat both."
"Don't be mean," said Lorelai, "I spent the entire day thinking about your pie, and now you're not going to let me have even a nibble? Oooh, that sounded less naughty in my head."
Luke sighed. "You're only going to waste it."
"You're just going to throw it out anyway," said Lorelai, "Because I don't think you should be serving day old pie."
"Maybe I want to give it to a homeless person."
"There are no homeless people in Stars Hollow."
"Then maybe I want to drive to Hartford and feed some homeless people there."
"You would drive all the way there just so I won't get the pie? How vindictive is that?" Lorelai said. "Well, let me tell you something, vindictiveness is the cornerstone of anger, which in itself is one of the seven deadly sins… so there."
"So is gluttony."
"What exactly is your point?"
"Just take the damn pie," Luke gave in. He cut her a slice and put it on her plate. "And make sure you finish it."
"Ha ha," Lorelai laughed, "You have no backbone whatsoever. You're like Spongebob Squarepants, only without the charming geometrical body shape."
"Do you want the pie or not? Because I could take it away anytime."
"Maybe you are unaware about a little thing I like to call charity," said Lorelai, "Which states, one should give unto those less fortunate, and not threaten to take away the things which one gives away just because the less fortunate happen to make a few comments which one does not like."
"Well, you've summed up the concept of charity well."
"I know. You should go to church more often. I hear they teach you all sorts of fun things like this," said Lorelai.
"I'm sure, somewhere a priest is smiling."
"You know," said Lorelai, after taking another huge bite of her pie. "When I was younger, I wanted to marry a priest. Do you want to know why?"
"If I said no, would it stop you from telling me anyways?"
"No, it wouldn't," said Lorelai. "You see, back then, I thought marrying a priest was my ticket to heaven. Because, once we were married, I could do whatever I like, and there's no way I'm going to hell, because if I went to hell, my priest husband would be sad, because obviously he would be going to heaven, and we would be separated. It would be like punishing him, and that would be wrong, because he's a priest and you don't punish priests in the afterlife. So I thought, if I married a priest, I would be pretty set for life."
"Do you listen to yourself when you talk?"
"Of course, eventually, someone sat me down and told me that you cannot marry your way into God's kingdom, which left me looking for Plan B," said Lorelai. "Ah, the foibles of youth. I need to be young again."
"I think you need a fast acting sedative," said Luke, "Are you done with your pie? I'm closing up soon."
"Done," said Lorelai, licking the fork and pushing her plate forward to Luke for inspection. "And if you examine it properly, you will see that I did not waste your pie. Once again, you have been proven wrong."
"Good," said Luke, taking the plate from her and washing it in the sink behind. "Although I'm surprised that bottomless pit of a stomach could squeeze in another piece of pie so late at night."
"The wonders of the human body," said Lorelai, getting up. She took out her purse. "How much do I owe you?"
"Forget about it," said Luke, drying his hands on a cloth hanging by the sink. "I don't charge customers for day old pie. Or for uneaten bagels and muffins, for that matter."
"Thank you, sir," said Lorelai, putting back her purse. "So, I'll see you tomorrow? I'll be the one salivating over your coffee."
She turned to go as Luke walked out from behind the counter. "I'll walk you home."
"It's okay, you don't have to," said Lorelai. "You probably have to lock up and everything."
"It's no big deal," Luke answered, as he followed her out of the diner. "I can do that later when I get back."
"Okay."
*
"So, our friend Jackie Chan was in the newspapers again," said Lorelai, as they walked up the porch steps. "Apparently he's frustrated that nobody considers him to be a serious actor."
"Now, that is surprising. Especially after his riveting performance in Rush Hour."
"You don't have to be sarcastic," said Lorelai, "And I happen to think that there are a few things we could learn from Mr. Chan."
"Yeah, like violence is an answer to everything."
"No, but right now I must admit it does look like an appealing course of action," said Lorelai. "Jackie Chan is the champion of the underdog; he teaches us to value action over words, to take a chance and not be afraid of the consequences. That is respectable."
"You haven't been drinking your perfume again, have you?"
"No, you know I only did that the one time," said Lorelai, "And let me tell you, again, that it is still perfectly normal to wonder whether anything that smells good, would also taste equally as good."
The front door opened, and Rory stepped out. "Oh, hi."
"Where are you going?" asked Lorelai, looking at her watch. "It's late."
"Dean called me," said Rory, "We're heading over to the lake to sit and talk and look at the stars. I hear it's a very romantic thing to do."
"It's late," Lorelai said, "I don't want you roaming all over town at night. Who knows what kind of psychopaths are out there?"
"Mom," Rory sighed, "It's Stars Hollow. The closest person we have to a psychopath is Miss Patty, and even she is just mildly threatening."
"To you, maybe," muttered Luke under his breath.
"We're just going to the lake," said Rory, "We won't be long. It's not like we're going to do anything illegal or something morally frowned upon."
"Well, you can do that here, can't you?" Lorelai said.
"We want to look at the lake."
"You want to look at the lake," Lorelai repeated.
"Yes."
"Just the lake."
"Just the lake," Rory confirmed.
"So, since you just want to look at the lake," said Lorelai, "You wouldn't mind if you and Dean stayed here, while I go out and take a Polaroid of the lake, and then give it to the two of you to look at in my living room."
"You can't go to the lake alone," Rory challenged. "It's late, and there are psychopaths. You said so yourself."
"I won't go alone," said Lorelai. "I'll take Luke."
"Excuse me?" Luke spoke. Lorelai and Rory decided it was best to ignore him.
"You're doing the exact same thing you don't want me to do," said Rory.
"Well, hello, that is a parent's job. Didn't you see 'Road to Perdition'?" Lorelai said.
"Mom…"
"Heh, okay," said Lorelai, "I'm done messing with you now. You can go. Just don't come back too late, and try not to drown. Our community tends to disapprove of parents who send their children to a watery grave."
"I'll try my best," said Rory, as she ran down the steps. "I'll see you later. Bye, Luke."
"That conversation could have been much shorter," said Luke.
"I know," said Lorelai, "But where's the fun in that? Hey, you want to come in for a while? I have an assorted array of water available. Tap water, bottled water, ice water – that's both cubed and crushed , by the way - warm water, hot water, the list goes on. I'm like a freaking bar."
"Thanks, but it's kind of late," said Luke, "And besides, I don't want your neighbors to get the wrong idea. I can see Babette staring out through her blinds over there."
"Well, I don't really blame her. Ever since Cinammon passed on, her social life has really gone downhill," said Lorelai. "Want to show her something worth seeing?"
She walked up close to him until their bodies were just inches apart. She looked up at Luke; from the right angle it could easily be misconstrued that the both of them were sharing an intimate moment.
'What are you doing?', the rational part of her mind screamed, but Lorelai couldn't hear it. She didn't know what she was doing , or why she did it, but she just felt that it was something she wanted to do. She couldn't understand it herself, but she guessed Rory would figure out an explanation for her later.
Luke looked at her, into her eyes. He was getting nervous, his heart was beating and his palms were beginning to sweat. He had been close to her before, physically, but this time it seemed different. There was something else there. He swallowed and fidgeted, putting his hands in his pockets and then taking them out. His usually gruff voice was somewhat strained: "You know, the whole town's going to go crazy if she tells them."
"So?"
"Lorelai?"
"Yeah?"
"What you said earlier … about action over words, and taking chances. Do you really believe in that?"
"I guess so," she said, "If it's the right action. And the right chance. Why?"
"Nothing, I just …" He stopped himself short, and leaned down.
He pressed his lips gently against hers, and kissed her.
Lorelai didn't object to that.
* *
to be continued
* *
I'm thinking of posting the next part in March 2004. What do you think? Haha… no, I'm not that wicked . . . or am I?