NIGHT OF THE LIVING PUMPKINS
[Zim looked out his window and shuddered. Tonight was the anniversary of his first Halloween, and that creepy trip into Dib's pathetic and twisted mind. He shuddered again as the sun started to go down. The Halloweenies would be back for sure, they always came. He knew it would be no different than last year's attack, but at least this time he could hope that Dib and his stupid head didn't come to him and take him back to that evil world of him. Zim stepped away from the window and called Gir to him. It was time to prepare to fortify the base so none of them could come in.]
"Gir! Come! It's time to fortify the base so none of the...eeehh...Halloweenies...can come in."
[That's what I just said.]
"Well, stop taking my lines evil narrator person of doom!"
[It's my duty...so shut up and act already...or I'll let the Halloweenies in.]
"NOOOOOO! Fine you win for now, human stink beast...Gir! Let's go!"
[With that, Zim left and went to making preparations upon his house. They boarded up the windows, they locked up the doors and put laser bomb across the front gate so if anyone entered tonight, they'd be blown to bits. He reset his gnomes to attack mode if anyone managed to get past the gate and up to the house. With that done, Zim went inside and hid in his house, peering out the widow and waiting for the Halloweenies to try and come through his defenses.
MEANWHILE.....
Over at Dib's house, Dib was getting ready himself. This time, he decided to go as himself, for he didn't plan to be doing any trick or treating...tonight, he planned to go terrorize Zim. He knew of his weakness for Halloweenies, so maybe if he were able to set Zim up as having a house party, they'd all flock to his house, all of those screaming, evil, candy eating goons he had to share his life with. Then Zim would go crazy as they filled the house and Dib would have a moment's joy watching his face as they all invaded his house to eat his 'Delicious Candy Blood'. Dib bet it wasn't that delicious either. He pulled on his boots and his black backpack filled with everything from a mini computer to toilet paper. Ha! He would show Zim tonight...not only would there be 'Halloweenies', but his house would be a total mess by the time Halloween was over. Dib chuckled to himself as he imagined the mess. He got up and headed outside where he'd lay in wait until they came. The fliers he had set out said that the party would be at 8: 30 pm. It was thirteen minuets until that time.
As Dib reached for the door, his father's voice came at him, stern and with that tone of 'Guess-what-I-have-smething-for-you-t-do-that-you-won't-like- but-who-cares-because-you-have-to-do-it-anyway-because-I-said-so-and-I'm- the-parent!' Dib groaned and turned around. If only he had been a few minuets faster.]
"Now Son! Hold on one second! have you forgotten our little agreement? You were to take your sister out Trick-or-Treating tonight. I'm busy and she really wants to go, but she can't unless she has SUPERVISION! So, go on, take your sister out, and make sure you're home by midnight...there's supposed to be a radioactive spill on the pumpkin patch and I don't want you out breathing that stuff. The last thing I need is RADIOACTIVE CHILDREN!!!! I'm off Son...have a good night!"
"But...Dad! I had plans!"
[But Professor Membrane didn't hear, even though he was still standing right there. He had once again shut off his ears to his children and turned them on to the scientific world of...SCIENCE! Dib slumped as Gaz trudged downstairs in her favorite Halloween outfit. She was again the Vampire Piggy Hunter this year and Dib sighed as she glared at him.]
"I'm only coming with you because Dad said I had to or I could stay home and do the chores. So let's go. "
"Fine..."
"And another thing Dib...If you embarrass me tonight, I'll rip your intestines out with a fork. Got it?"
Dib gulped, "Ok...whatever...but one more thing, Gaz. I won't bother you if you leave me alone while I torture Zim..."
Gaz was thoughtful for a moment. "Torture Zim! What are you going to do to him?" then she realized what she was saying. "No...don't tell me, I bet you're just going to go and poke him in the head with a lamp or something stupid like that..."
"Actually, I was going to wreck his house."
[Dib opened the door and walked out, Gaz behind him, interested now, oddly enough.]
"Ooooooh...how are you gonna do that? Napalm? Chainsaw? Spooky noises under his house?"
"No, actually...wait...WHY DO YOU WANT TO KNOW?"
"You're right...why DO I want to know?"
[Dib was silent as they walked from door to door, collecting candy. Dib looked at a watch and whispered to Gaz.]
"Psst...hey, why don't we agree to ditch this candy hunting and go torment Zim? I'll let you help if you want."
Gaz thought about it for a moment. "Sure...why not...it beats this."
[So they ran to Zim's house which, just as Dib had expected, the Halloweenies had flocked to, each with a flyer in their had. He was a genius! On each flier he had printed....
COME TO ZIM'S HOUSE FOR THE COOLEST PARTY IN AGES!
WEAR YOUR BEST COSTUMES...
THERE WILL BE PUNCH, AND CANDY GALORE!
THERE WILL BE A BIG DANCE AND A CONTEST FOR THE BEST COSTUME FROM CATEGORIES SUCH AS :
MOST SCARIEST
MOST HORRIBLE
AND MOST GOOIEST!
STARTS AT 8:30 PM AND GOES TO 3:00 AM!
COME JOIN THE SCARIEST PARTY ON EARTH, AND DON'T FORGET TO GIVE ZIM A BIG HUG AND HE'LL GIVE YOU EXTRA CANDY!
Dib chuckled to himself as they approached the house where a small mob was waiting. Having seen the red lines across their entry, they had thought it must be a really good party if he had to have ropes to block off the people he didn't want to come in. They were looking for the bouncer when Dib came up. He smiled and slipped out sunglasses and an earphone thing. He stuck a sign to the front of his shirt that said 'BOUNCER' and stepped in front of the crowd and held up his hand for silence. They quieted and he spoke. As he spoke, he slipped out laser mirrors from his pocket and waited.]
"EVERYONE THAT'S GOING TO THIS PARTY, PLEASE LINE UP AND WAIT WHILE I OPEN THE GATE. SHOW ME THE FLIER AND GET IN FREE!"
[Dib turned and positioned the laser mirrors on the fence so they intercepted the lasers and sent them at the gnomes who were blown up on that instance. The crowd cheered, thinking that this was all a show and that those were fireworks. Dib stepped to the side and announced one more thing after pretending to talk into his microphone.]
"CHANGE OF PLANS! ZIM HAS REQUESTED THAT YOU ALL GET TO COME IN FREE! FLIERS OR NO! EVERYONE IN THAT'S GOING IN!!!!!!!!"
[Dib stepped back out of the way as the kids, at least 50 of them ran through his fence towards the house. Inside, Dib heard screams as the kids came running towards him. There were loud explosions as some kids were catapulted out of the way and across the fence into oblivion. Only about 16 made it into the house and they started to dance and hug Zim, demanding candy. Gaz and Dib stood together outside his fence laughing their heads off as they watched Zim run back and forth in the house screaming and pulling his antennas. For once, Dib and Gaz seemed like real brothers and sisters, standing here laughing and having a jolly good time while watching the pain of another. Dib pulled the toilet paper, eggs, and silly string from his pack and handed some to Gaz. She took them eagerly and chucked the eggs at the house as the people inside laughed and had fun driving Zim insane. Gir danced with them in his adorable dog outfit.
Inside, Zim was being cornered by all sorts of....things...a were-pig...a cardboard robot, a vampire with horn rim glasses and a bad cold, and a screaming fat girl in a fairy outfit. Zim flung his arms around wildly, to keep them and their...GERMS! off him. Out side, he caught glimpse of Dib and Gaz laughing as they chucked things at his house. Screaming about the mission ending, he managed to escape under their arms that tried to embrace him for candy. He ran outside and started to scream at Dib and Gaz who stood there and laughed. Gaz hit him on the head with an egg and he screamed again. Dropping to the ground to shrivel in pain and twitch, Zim cursed them even more. Dib and Gaz started to laugh. Once Zim figured out that the egg wasn't poisonous to his skin, or at least in a way that showed at the moment, he leapt up and charged Dib. Gaz stepped back out of the way.
Dib and Zim hit the pavement and wrestled around while Gaz stood watching, the party still going on inside. Zim was on top of Dib, choking him when the kids realized that their ticket to free candy was out the door. They suddenly all came after him screaming for candy. Zim looked over with wide eyes as Gaz stepped out of the way. Dib and Zim both screamed at the trampling Halloweenies. Dib threw Zim off at the crowd and slipped under them to Gaz who had climbed upon a broken Gnome and was watching with interest.]
"Whew! Almost Didn't make it! Let's get outta here before they trample us too!" Dib said.
"But it was getting good!" Gaz said, folding her arms across her.
"Noooooo! You will pay Dib beast! YOU and your little sister too! wow...that sorta sounded like something the witch off of Oz would say...." Zim yelled as he was mauled by trick-or-treaters.
[With that Zim leapt up on top of the heads of the Halloweenies and leapt on Dib, slamming his head to the ground. In a few seconds the Halloweenies had changed direction and had run at Zim again. Zim and Dib rolled over by his stairs, Dib slamming Zim's head into the stairs this time as they wrestled. Zim looked up at the on coming Halloweenies and screamed. Suddenly, they stopped and looked around. When they caught sight of something beyond the house, they all turned around and fled, screaming. Gaz, Zim, and Dib stopped and looked around. Zim screamed and threw Dib off and leapt in the house, slamming the door on Dib's face. Dib pounded on the door. Gaz appeared beside him and kicked the door. Moments later, the door fell open and Gaz entered, dragging Dib behind her to find Zim screaming at a few remaining kids still in his house. He turned around and screamed at them.]
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE? OUT OUT I SAY! OR FEEL MY WRATH!"
"Shut up..." Gaz said, dropping her brother on the floor.
[Zim opened his mouth to say something when a small pumpkin flew into the room and rolled across the floor to land at Zim's feet. Zim screamed and backed away, tripping over Keef who was laying on the ground staring at the ceiling for some reason. The pumpkin rolled around to face the others and laughed evilly before leaping up on Melvin who was standing there looking around all paranoid like, and chewing on his ear. Melvin leapt up and screamed as the pumpkin ripped off chunks of his ear. Zim, Dib, and the remaining five people screamed as Melvin ran out the broken door screaming where tons of other pumpkins were waiting in ambush. They covered him, eating him whole, leaving only a skeleton and a shoe. Zim leapt up and grabbed the door, Dib following suit, despite his wishes to see Zim eaten alive...]
"yeah...that's be funny....I mean...C'mon! help me Gaz, someone..." Dib yelled, lifting up the door with Zim on the other side trying to turn it the other way."
"That's not funny Dib worm!" Zim growled.
"No time! The pumpkins are coming!"
[And it's true, they were coming, all with vicious teeth carved out of their 'flesh' snapping, their candles flickering in their heads. Zim and Dib placed the door in it's proper place while Gaz sat on the couch with Gir who was singing the new 'Acne Blast' song. Keef lay on the floor staring up at the ceiling while Gretchen stood in the corner shaking and gnawing on her nails while the popular girl Jessica stood, arms crossed grumbling about how stupid it was. Brian sat on the ground stuffing himself from his collected goodies, while two others stood shadily in the corner. Dib and Zim secured the door with wood and nails that came from 'Nowhere'. With that accomplished, they slid to the ground with a sigh of relief. The pumpkins growled and pounded on the door. Zim stood up and yelled at the small crowd in his living room.]
"See what you worm babies did! Get out of my house!!!!!!!!"
"We can't Zim, if we leave we get eaten, and then you're without help when they eat you!" Dib said.
"Quiet!"
"No! You shut up!"
"Both of you shut up...your voices are making my stomach turn..." Gaz complained.
"What are we gonna do? What are we gonna do? WHAT ARE WE GONNA...." Gretchen cried over and over again in the corner.
"Argh! I can't believe that I came to this party in the first place...what a waste of my candy colleting time!" Jessica said, straitening her pink princess dress.
"Hey everyone! I know...I could bake us some cookies! That'd help us all cheer up wouldn't it? Right Zim? It always cheers him up! I know because he's my Bestest Friend!" Keef said, leaping up with a glow to his eyes.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I'M trapped in a house with a bunch of Halloweenies and a freak! Zim screamed.
"Shut up....where's the remote?" Gaz asked, irritated.
[Gir opened his head and gave her the remote and she clicked the red power button. The TV was blank and she pressed it again. Nothing still. A guy slipped out of the shadows and tried his light switch...Nothing. He slipped back into the shadows with the other one. Zim screamed again.]
"STOP MESSING WITH MY ELECTRICAL UNITS FOUL BEINGS! FEEL THE WRATH OF THE IRON FIST!" Zim screamed.
[Zim leapt up, tossing something at the guy in the shadows, hitting him on the head and knocking him out. He fell to the ground unconscious. Zim then threw something at Keef, knocking him over too and leapt towards Gaz. He tackled Gaz and rolled off to the floor, taking her with him. The remote broke and Gir leapt off and ate the remote, running away screaming. Gaz opened her eyes to glare at Zim. Zim realized his mistake and leapt up, running off, Gaz chasing after him. They disappeared into the next room. Keef sat up, rubbing his head and looked around stupidly. Dib watched blankly, Jessica frowned, Gretchen shuddered and cried in the corner. One shadowy figure bent over and poked the other one that had fallen. Dib raised an eye brow when all of the sudden there was a loud CRASH! as the window broke to the left of him. Screaming, he grabbed another board and a hammer and started to hammer the board on the window. Gretchen, seeing Dib in danger from outside pumpkins, ran over to help him nail the boards to the windows.
The conscious of the shadowy figure rushed over to help nail the boards to the other windows, nailing furiously to keep out the pumpkins. Keef ran over to help as Jessica sat down and pouted about her position. The unconscious one just lay on the floor...well....unconscious....Gaz came back in, seeing the trouble and shrugged. She sat on the couch.]
[Ahem...I think this is where you get up and help nail boards to the windows...]
"And if I don't?"
[You'll be the first to go!]
"hah....those pumpkins don't scare me..."
[And you won't get to stick around for the end...or play your Gameslave or do other things that come later on...]
"Fine..."
[Gaz leapt up and helped nail boards to the windows. As they were doing this, they all caught a glimpse of the evil that was awaiting beyond the boards and the yard. The pumpkins had taken the half eaten bodies of those that they had slaughtered and now were able to pick things up and chuck them at the house and reach in through the windows all creepy-like. The faster they nailed, the more the pumpkins came. There was a scream from the kitchen and Keef ran in to assist Zim in boarding up all the windows. For every board they put up, another one was knocked out and another dead hand came through, reaching for the closest victim. Just when they had everything boarded up, they started to relax, for the moment. Jessica grumbled from her chair that she had put up.]
"This is so stupid! Why did Stupid Zim have to lock me up with all these morons and freaks...eeehh...what'll this do for my social status? Oh no...If they knew that I was hanging out with these guys then I'd..." Jessica started.
[Suddenly, a board was broken and a hand reached through and grabbed Jessica around the throat, pulling her up to the window. Since the window opening wasn't big enough for her body, she hit her head on the boards and had time to kick and scream and yell for the 'freaks' to save her. They all stared wide-eyed for a few moments before Dib leapt up with Gretchen and the shadowy girl and tugged on her ankles and tried to pull her through back into the house. They didn't succeed though. Jessica was pulled through the newly broken hole that Dib was quick to patch up. From outside came the screams of Jessica being devoured for her body. Dib stumbled backwards and hit the ground. Gretchen screamed hysterically and grabbed Dib, sobbing like crazy like all the crazy blondes do in the movies.]
"ekkkk....arghhh...he...eeghf....Plesh...Gretken...argkkk..." Dib choked.
[The shadowy figure form the corner pulled Gretchen off of him and Dib lay on the ground panting. Zim came in screaming again. He had blood all over him and his eyes were wild. He grabbed the shadowy girl's clothing and shook her screaming over and over again with inaudible words.]
"KEEF! ZOMBIES! WINDOW...I TOLD THEM....EEP!...MAR....SHE...SDOUU...SHADEEEE....EKKK..."
"Get a hold of yourself!" the girl said, slapping him, bringing him to his senses.
"WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE???"
[Zim ran about wildly screaming about the pumpkins. Suddenly, Gaz leapt up and socked him in his gut. He fell down gasping for air, quietly and Gaz sat back down, satisfied. From the corner there was a groan as the shadowy guy sat up, rubbing his head. Dib sat up and looked around at his little party of survivors.]
"Now...wh-what do we...do-ooo?" Gretchen cried.
..........................................................
"I said....Now what do we dooooo?"
"I guess stay here until they go away?" Keef suggested, scaring the hell out of everyone because they all thought he was dead.
"AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!1 wait a minuet...YOUR DEAD!!!!!" They screamed.
"no...no I'm not..." Keef protested.
"I think we all know dead from alive Keef..." Dib said, "besides, where'd all the blood come from?"
"Yes...and where's your guts?" Asked the shadowy girl.
"Uh......" Keef said.
"Well?"
"ARGH! You figured me out!" Keef screamed.
[Keef's head started to turn around on his shoulders as his eyes turned red and drool dropped from his open, screaming mouth. It settled in place and Keef advanced. The shadowy guy came up outta nowhere and whapped him over the head with a frying pan. Keef fell to the ground and Dib and Zim lifted him up and threw him out the window. They turned back to the group as if that had been nothing. The shadowy couple moved into the light and their faces were revealed! They were both way older than Zim or Dib, about 26 or so, and wore black and sunglasses. The girl's hair was pulled back in a bun, they guy's hair slicked back. Dib grinned.]
"Hmmm...I knew it Agent %....." the girl said.
"Yes...they were right Agent *....the pumpkins ARE radioactive..." Agent % said.
"you guys are government people?" Dib asked.
"Yes....yes we are...and we are investigating the source of the RADIOACTIVE PUMPKINS....and being trapped in here with a bunch of freaks..." Agent * said.
"Wow! What branch are you guys from?"
"The Z-Files...." Agent % said.
"That's like the X-Files....right?" Dib asked.
"That's confidential..." Agent % said.
"Oh please? C'mon! You're gonna die anyway!"
"WHAT? WE ARE? WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?" Agent * screamed, "YOU'RE ON THEIR SIDE!"
"No...it said so in the script...anyway...you're not important characters and I am, so that's how I know it'll be you...not me..."
"I see...Fine..." Agent * said.
"Yes...the Z-Files are next to the X-Files...we work on the more important cases, like that of the elusive PIG FOOT!" Agent % said in a mysterious tone.
"Uh....Pig foot? That's ridiculous!"
"That's what you say...but wait until you meet the guy! then you'll have more respect for him! oooh...he's elusive!" Agent % said.
"Why are you here then? Aren't Mulder and Scully supposed to be here, I mean, this is a pretty big case..."
"Uh...yes....Mulder and Scully...they were uh...." Agent % stumbled.
"Gone! On another case [the closet door some miles away back at headquarters jiggles and you can hear Mulder's voice scream 'LEMME OUTTA HERE!']...Uh...CONFIDENTIAL! Look! A moose!" Agent * screamed pointing.
[They all looked and the two slipped back into the shadows. From outside, groans came and the evil pumpkins scratched on the door and windows to get in. And this story is really going nowhere...SOOOOOOOOOO.....uh....Brian was eaten because he ran outta the house screaming about not having enough candy.]
HOURS PASSED, THE CLOCK STRUCK 1:28AM....
[Dib slumped over on the couch, Gaz sat at the end, frowning and crossing her arms, Gretchen cried in the corner, the agents, Agent * and Agent % stood around creepily, and Zim ran about the house screaming about the Halloweenies. Blah blah blah blah....]
"Man! I'm going to go Insane if we don't get out of here soon!" Dib said.
"Not to worry young man! We're working on a way out as we speak!" Agent * said confidently.
"Yeah...what is it this time? Throw one of us at them and then try to make a break for it?"
"YES! THAT'S IT!" Agent % screamed.
"you can't be serious..." Dib said flatly.
"Who volunteers?" Agent * asked.
[Everyone looked around. It was quiet, outside and inside. Zim stopped ranting to shake his head no violently. Gaz glared at them and Dib stared with his mouth open. Suddenly, the agents leapt up and grabbed Gretchen, they flung open the door and tossed her out and Agent * ran out first, screaming as she was taken down by the pumpkins who had hideously mutated to include bodies with muscles now. Agent % screamed and ran back in, a small pumpkin without a body gnawing on his leg. That's when the Evil pumpkins started on their final attack. They swarmed the house, body parts slithering through the cracks in the boards, grabbing whoever they could. Agent % was pulled down, eaten by the pumpkins as they started shambling up to the house, horrible grinning faces, flickering with evil and death. Dib and Zim screamed as Gaz grumbled. Gir looked around and started to scream too before running out into the Zombie Pumpkins and disappearing. Dib and Zim grabbed sticks that magically appeared out of nowhere and started to fight them off.
They kept coming and coming and Gaz was soon forced to fight back as well. She kicked them and tore them apart ruthlessly while Dib and Zim battled them off with their measly little sticks.]
"Hold on a second...why does Gaz get to destroy these things and we have to hit them with 'measly little sticks'? that's not fair..."
[Because I said so...that's why...now get to whapping those pumpkins or be pumpkin meat!]
"Eeeeeee! I KNEW THIS WOULD HAPPEN! SEE WHAT YOU DID DIB?"
[They fought them off tooth and claw as they were pushed back into the kitchen where they had no choice but to go down into Zim's lair. They dragged Gaz down there and boarded that entrance shut while the Zombie Pumpkins roamed around upstairs. Suddenly, they heard a voice from above. It was terrible and raspy and...well...evil...]
"Give us the large headed one and we will go away....we need his brain meats for our leader! Give him up or suffer!" It screamed.
"WHAT! You can't be serious..." Dib said with his mouth ajar.
[Zim and Gaz looked at each other and then back at Dib. Dib turned around to see their looks and frowned, shaking his head and backing away.]
"No! No! You can't! C'mon! I'm the hero! Guys! you don't really believe them do you? Guys please! Gaz! I'm your own brother for heaven's sakes! Please! You can't do this to me! You..." Dib said as they grabbed him and lifted him above their heads. Dib kicked and struggled as they hauled him over to the exit thing.
"Well Dib...It's been nice knowing you..." Gaz said.
"All I can say is that it'll be a lot easier to take over this pathetic planet without you around Dib...See Ya!" Zim said pushing him into the elevator thingy.
[Dib screamed as he rolled over to the farthest edge of the elevator, hog tied and unmoving. Zim laughed a diabolical laugh and Gaz looked at him out of the corner of her eye, glaring at him. They sent the elevator up. Dib watched it as it closed, screaming vengeance.]
*****
[A few minuets later....]
"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....HAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAAHAH....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH...* cough cough* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...."
"Will you shut up already? You've been doing that forever..."
"Why? This is my lab...my base...my life...what are YOU gonna do about it? Little Gaz...?"
"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAeerrk!"
[Zim was cut off in the middle of his laugh by Gaz's had on his throat. She glared and threw him into the elevator and sent it up to the reaming Zombie Pumpkins that were up there looking for a good meal or a body. Zim screamed as Gaz wandered over to his computer, tapping into it and bringing up a few video games. She settled down for a long night of killing Vampire Piggies...]
DUN DUN DUN! the end....
*or so we think*
[Zim looked out his window and shuddered. Tonight was the anniversary of his first Halloween, and that creepy trip into Dib's pathetic and twisted mind. He shuddered again as the sun started to go down. The Halloweenies would be back for sure, they always came. He knew it would be no different than last year's attack, but at least this time he could hope that Dib and his stupid head didn't come to him and take him back to that evil world of him. Zim stepped away from the window and called Gir to him. It was time to prepare to fortify the base so none of them could come in.]
"Gir! Come! It's time to fortify the base so none of the...eeehh...Halloweenies...can come in."
[That's what I just said.]
"Well, stop taking my lines evil narrator person of doom!"
[It's my duty...so shut up and act already...or I'll let the Halloweenies in.]
"NOOOOOO! Fine you win for now, human stink beast...Gir! Let's go!"
[With that, Zim left and went to making preparations upon his house. They boarded up the windows, they locked up the doors and put laser bomb across the front gate so if anyone entered tonight, they'd be blown to bits. He reset his gnomes to attack mode if anyone managed to get past the gate and up to the house. With that done, Zim went inside and hid in his house, peering out the widow and waiting for the Halloweenies to try and come through his defenses.
MEANWHILE.....
Over at Dib's house, Dib was getting ready himself. This time, he decided to go as himself, for he didn't plan to be doing any trick or treating...tonight, he planned to go terrorize Zim. He knew of his weakness for Halloweenies, so maybe if he were able to set Zim up as having a house party, they'd all flock to his house, all of those screaming, evil, candy eating goons he had to share his life with. Then Zim would go crazy as they filled the house and Dib would have a moment's joy watching his face as they all invaded his house to eat his 'Delicious Candy Blood'. Dib bet it wasn't that delicious either. He pulled on his boots and his black backpack filled with everything from a mini computer to toilet paper. Ha! He would show Zim tonight...not only would there be 'Halloweenies', but his house would be a total mess by the time Halloween was over. Dib chuckled to himself as he imagined the mess. He got up and headed outside where he'd lay in wait until they came. The fliers he had set out said that the party would be at 8: 30 pm. It was thirteen minuets until that time.
As Dib reached for the door, his father's voice came at him, stern and with that tone of 'Guess-what-I-have-smething-for-you-t-do-that-you-won't-like- but-who-cares-because-you-have-to-do-it-anyway-because-I-said-so-and-I'm- the-parent!' Dib groaned and turned around. If only he had been a few minuets faster.]
"Now Son! Hold on one second! have you forgotten our little agreement? You were to take your sister out Trick-or-Treating tonight. I'm busy and she really wants to go, but she can't unless she has SUPERVISION! So, go on, take your sister out, and make sure you're home by midnight...there's supposed to be a radioactive spill on the pumpkin patch and I don't want you out breathing that stuff. The last thing I need is RADIOACTIVE CHILDREN!!!! I'm off Son...have a good night!"
"But...Dad! I had plans!"
[But Professor Membrane didn't hear, even though he was still standing right there. He had once again shut off his ears to his children and turned them on to the scientific world of...SCIENCE! Dib slumped as Gaz trudged downstairs in her favorite Halloween outfit. She was again the Vampire Piggy Hunter this year and Dib sighed as she glared at him.]
"I'm only coming with you because Dad said I had to or I could stay home and do the chores. So let's go. "
"Fine..."
"And another thing Dib...If you embarrass me tonight, I'll rip your intestines out with a fork. Got it?"
Dib gulped, "Ok...whatever...but one more thing, Gaz. I won't bother you if you leave me alone while I torture Zim..."
Gaz was thoughtful for a moment. "Torture Zim! What are you going to do to him?" then she realized what she was saying. "No...don't tell me, I bet you're just going to go and poke him in the head with a lamp or something stupid like that..."
"Actually, I was going to wreck his house."
[Dib opened the door and walked out, Gaz behind him, interested now, oddly enough.]
"Ooooooh...how are you gonna do that? Napalm? Chainsaw? Spooky noises under his house?"
"No, actually...wait...WHY DO YOU WANT TO KNOW?"
"You're right...why DO I want to know?"
[Dib was silent as they walked from door to door, collecting candy. Dib looked at a watch and whispered to Gaz.]
"Psst...hey, why don't we agree to ditch this candy hunting and go torment Zim? I'll let you help if you want."
Gaz thought about it for a moment. "Sure...why not...it beats this."
[So they ran to Zim's house which, just as Dib had expected, the Halloweenies had flocked to, each with a flyer in their had. He was a genius! On each flier he had printed....
COME TO ZIM'S HOUSE FOR THE COOLEST PARTY IN AGES!
WEAR YOUR BEST COSTUMES...
THERE WILL BE PUNCH, AND CANDY GALORE!
THERE WILL BE A BIG DANCE AND A CONTEST FOR THE BEST COSTUME FROM CATEGORIES SUCH AS :
MOST SCARIEST
MOST HORRIBLE
AND MOST GOOIEST!
STARTS AT 8:30 PM AND GOES TO 3:00 AM!
COME JOIN THE SCARIEST PARTY ON EARTH, AND DON'T FORGET TO GIVE ZIM A BIG HUG AND HE'LL GIVE YOU EXTRA CANDY!
Dib chuckled to himself as they approached the house where a small mob was waiting. Having seen the red lines across their entry, they had thought it must be a really good party if he had to have ropes to block off the people he didn't want to come in. They were looking for the bouncer when Dib came up. He smiled and slipped out sunglasses and an earphone thing. He stuck a sign to the front of his shirt that said 'BOUNCER' and stepped in front of the crowd and held up his hand for silence. They quieted and he spoke. As he spoke, he slipped out laser mirrors from his pocket and waited.]
"EVERYONE THAT'S GOING TO THIS PARTY, PLEASE LINE UP AND WAIT WHILE I OPEN THE GATE. SHOW ME THE FLIER AND GET IN FREE!"
[Dib turned and positioned the laser mirrors on the fence so they intercepted the lasers and sent them at the gnomes who were blown up on that instance. The crowd cheered, thinking that this was all a show and that those were fireworks. Dib stepped to the side and announced one more thing after pretending to talk into his microphone.]
"CHANGE OF PLANS! ZIM HAS REQUESTED THAT YOU ALL GET TO COME IN FREE! FLIERS OR NO! EVERYONE IN THAT'S GOING IN!!!!!!!!"
[Dib stepped back out of the way as the kids, at least 50 of them ran through his fence towards the house. Inside, Dib heard screams as the kids came running towards him. There were loud explosions as some kids were catapulted out of the way and across the fence into oblivion. Only about 16 made it into the house and they started to dance and hug Zim, demanding candy. Gaz and Dib stood together outside his fence laughing their heads off as they watched Zim run back and forth in the house screaming and pulling his antennas. For once, Dib and Gaz seemed like real brothers and sisters, standing here laughing and having a jolly good time while watching the pain of another. Dib pulled the toilet paper, eggs, and silly string from his pack and handed some to Gaz. She took them eagerly and chucked the eggs at the house as the people inside laughed and had fun driving Zim insane. Gir danced with them in his adorable dog outfit.
Inside, Zim was being cornered by all sorts of....things...a were-pig...a cardboard robot, a vampire with horn rim glasses and a bad cold, and a screaming fat girl in a fairy outfit. Zim flung his arms around wildly, to keep them and their...GERMS! off him. Out side, he caught glimpse of Dib and Gaz laughing as they chucked things at his house. Screaming about the mission ending, he managed to escape under their arms that tried to embrace him for candy. He ran outside and started to scream at Dib and Gaz who stood there and laughed. Gaz hit him on the head with an egg and he screamed again. Dropping to the ground to shrivel in pain and twitch, Zim cursed them even more. Dib and Gaz started to laugh. Once Zim figured out that the egg wasn't poisonous to his skin, or at least in a way that showed at the moment, he leapt up and charged Dib. Gaz stepped back out of the way.
Dib and Zim hit the pavement and wrestled around while Gaz stood watching, the party still going on inside. Zim was on top of Dib, choking him when the kids realized that their ticket to free candy was out the door. They suddenly all came after him screaming for candy. Zim looked over with wide eyes as Gaz stepped out of the way. Dib and Zim both screamed at the trampling Halloweenies. Dib threw Zim off at the crowd and slipped under them to Gaz who had climbed upon a broken Gnome and was watching with interest.]
"Whew! Almost Didn't make it! Let's get outta here before they trample us too!" Dib said.
"But it was getting good!" Gaz said, folding her arms across her.
"Noooooo! You will pay Dib beast! YOU and your little sister too! wow...that sorta sounded like something the witch off of Oz would say...." Zim yelled as he was mauled by trick-or-treaters.
[With that Zim leapt up on top of the heads of the Halloweenies and leapt on Dib, slamming his head to the ground. In a few seconds the Halloweenies had changed direction and had run at Zim again. Zim and Dib rolled over by his stairs, Dib slamming Zim's head into the stairs this time as they wrestled. Zim looked up at the on coming Halloweenies and screamed. Suddenly, they stopped and looked around. When they caught sight of something beyond the house, they all turned around and fled, screaming. Gaz, Zim, and Dib stopped and looked around. Zim screamed and threw Dib off and leapt in the house, slamming the door on Dib's face. Dib pounded on the door. Gaz appeared beside him and kicked the door. Moments later, the door fell open and Gaz entered, dragging Dib behind her to find Zim screaming at a few remaining kids still in his house. He turned around and screamed at them.]
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE? OUT OUT I SAY! OR FEEL MY WRATH!"
"Shut up..." Gaz said, dropping her brother on the floor.
[Zim opened his mouth to say something when a small pumpkin flew into the room and rolled across the floor to land at Zim's feet. Zim screamed and backed away, tripping over Keef who was laying on the ground staring at the ceiling for some reason. The pumpkin rolled around to face the others and laughed evilly before leaping up on Melvin who was standing there looking around all paranoid like, and chewing on his ear. Melvin leapt up and screamed as the pumpkin ripped off chunks of his ear. Zim, Dib, and the remaining five people screamed as Melvin ran out the broken door screaming where tons of other pumpkins were waiting in ambush. They covered him, eating him whole, leaving only a skeleton and a shoe. Zim leapt up and grabbed the door, Dib following suit, despite his wishes to see Zim eaten alive...]
"yeah...that's be funny....I mean...C'mon! help me Gaz, someone..." Dib yelled, lifting up the door with Zim on the other side trying to turn it the other way."
"That's not funny Dib worm!" Zim growled.
"No time! The pumpkins are coming!"
[And it's true, they were coming, all with vicious teeth carved out of their 'flesh' snapping, their candles flickering in their heads. Zim and Dib placed the door in it's proper place while Gaz sat on the couch with Gir who was singing the new 'Acne Blast' song. Keef lay on the floor staring up at the ceiling while Gretchen stood in the corner shaking and gnawing on her nails while the popular girl Jessica stood, arms crossed grumbling about how stupid it was. Brian sat on the ground stuffing himself from his collected goodies, while two others stood shadily in the corner. Dib and Zim secured the door with wood and nails that came from 'Nowhere'. With that accomplished, they slid to the ground with a sigh of relief. The pumpkins growled and pounded on the door. Zim stood up and yelled at the small crowd in his living room.]
"See what you worm babies did! Get out of my house!!!!!!!!"
"We can't Zim, if we leave we get eaten, and then you're without help when they eat you!" Dib said.
"Quiet!"
"No! You shut up!"
"Both of you shut up...your voices are making my stomach turn..." Gaz complained.
"What are we gonna do? What are we gonna do? WHAT ARE WE GONNA...." Gretchen cried over and over again in the corner.
"Argh! I can't believe that I came to this party in the first place...what a waste of my candy colleting time!" Jessica said, straitening her pink princess dress.
"Hey everyone! I know...I could bake us some cookies! That'd help us all cheer up wouldn't it? Right Zim? It always cheers him up! I know because he's my Bestest Friend!" Keef said, leaping up with a glow to his eyes.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I'M trapped in a house with a bunch of Halloweenies and a freak! Zim screamed.
"Shut up....where's the remote?" Gaz asked, irritated.
[Gir opened his head and gave her the remote and she clicked the red power button. The TV was blank and she pressed it again. Nothing still. A guy slipped out of the shadows and tried his light switch...Nothing. He slipped back into the shadows with the other one. Zim screamed again.]
"STOP MESSING WITH MY ELECTRICAL UNITS FOUL BEINGS! FEEL THE WRATH OF THE IRON FIST!" Zim screamed.
[Zim leapt up, tossing something at the guy in the shadows, hitting him on the head and knocking him out. He fell to the ground unconscious. Zim then threw something at Keef, knocking him over too and leapt towards Gaz. He tackled Gaz and rolled off to the floor, taking her with him. The remote broke and Gir leapt off and ate the remote, running away screaming. Gaz opened her eyes to glare at Zim. Zim realized his mistake and leapt up, running off, Gaz chasing after him. They disappeared into the next room. Keef sat up, rubbing his head and looked around stupidly. Dib watched blankly, Jessica frowned, Gretchen shuddered and cried in the corner. One shadowy figure bent over and poked the other one that had fallen. Dib raised an eye brow when all of the sudden there was a loud CRASH! as the window broke to the left of him. Screaming, he grabbed another board and a hammer and started to hammer the board on the window. Gretchen, seeing Dib in danger from outside pumpkins, ran over to help him nail the boards to the windows.
The conscious of the shadowy figure rushed over to help nail the boards to the other windows, nailing furiously to keep out the pumpkins. Keef ran over to help as Jessica sat down and pouted about her position. The unconscious one just lay on the floor...well....unconscious....Gaz came back in, seeing the trouble and shrugged. She sat on the couch.]
[Ahem...I think this is where you get up and help nail boards to the windows...]
"And if I don't?"
[You'll be the first to go!]
"hah....those pumpkins don't scare me..."
[And you won't get to stick around for the end...or play your Gameslave or do other things that come later on...]
"Fine..."
[Gaz leapt up and helped nail boards to the windows. As they were doing this, they all caught a glimpse of the evil that was awaiting beyond the boards and the yard. The pumpkins had taken the half eaten bodies of those that they had slaughtered and now were able to pick things up and chuck them at the house and reach in through the windows all creepy-like. The faster they nailed, the more the pumpkins came. There was a scream from the kitchen and Keef ran in to assist Zim in boarding up all the windows. For every board they put up, another one was knocked out and another dead hand came through, reaching for the closest victim. Just when they had everything boarded up, they started to relax, for the moment. Jessica grumbled from her chair that she had put up.]
"This is so stupid! Why did Stupid Zim have to lock me up with all these morons and freaks...eeehh...what'll this do for my social status? Oh no...If they knew that I was hanging out with these guys then I'd..." Jessica started.
[Suddenly, a board was broken and a hand reached through and grabbed Jessica around the throat, pulling her up to the window. Since the window opening wasn't big enough for her body, she hit her head on the boards and had time to kick and scream and yell for the 'freaks' to save her. They all stared wide-eyed for a few moments before Dib leapt up with Gretchen and the shadowy girl and tugged on her ankles and tried to pull her through back into the house. They didn't succeed though. Jessica was pulled through the newly broken hole that Dib was quick to patch up. From outside came the screams of Jessica being devoured for her body. Dib stumbled backwards and hit the ground. Gretchen screamed hysterically and grabbed Dib, sobbing like crazy like all the crazy blondes do in the movies.]
"ekkkk....arghhh...he...eeghf....Plesh...Gretken...argkkk..." Dib choked.
[The shadowy figure form the corner pulled Gretchen off of him and Dib lay on the ground panting. Zim came in screaming again. He had blood all over him and his eyes were wild. He grabbed the shadowy girl's clothing and shook her screaming over and over again with inaudible words.]
"KEEF! ZOMBIES! WINDOW...I TOLD THEM....EEP!...MAR....SHE...SDOUU...SHADEEEE....EKKK..."
"Get a hold of yourself!" the girl said, slapping him, bringing him to his senses.
"WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE???"
[Zim ran about wildly screaming about the pumpkins. Suddenly, Gaz leapt up and socked him in his gut. He fell down gasping for air, quietly and Gaz sat back down, satisfied. From the corner there was a groan as the shadowy guy sat up, rubbing his head. Dib sat up and looked around at his little party of survivors.]
"Now...wh-what do we...do-ooo?" Gretchen cried.
..........................................................
"I said....Now what do we dooooo?"
"I guess stay here until they go away?" Keef suggested, scaring the hell out of everyone because they all thought he was dead.
"AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!1 wait a minuet...YOUR DEAD!!!!!" They screamed.
"no...no I'm not..." Keef protested.
"I think we all know dead from alive Keef..." Dib said, "besides, where'd all the blood come from?"
"Yes...and where's your guts?" Asked the shadowy girl.
"Uh......" Keef said.
"Well?"
"ARGH! You figured me out!" Keef screamed.
[Keef's head started to turn around on his shoulders as his eyes turned red and drool dropped from his open, screaming mouth. It settled in place and Keef advanced. The shadowy guy came up outta nowhere and whapped him over the head with a frying pan. Keef fell to the ground and Dib and Zim lifted him up and threw him out the window. They turned back to the group as if that had been nothing. The shadowy couple moved into the light and their faces were revealed! They were both way older than Zim or Dib, about 26 or so, and wore black and sunglasses. The girl's hair was pulled back in a bun, they guy's hair slicked back. Dib grinned.]
"Hmmm...I knew it Agent %....." the girl said.
"Yes...they were right Agent *....the pumpkins ARE radioactive..." Agent % said.
"you guys are government people?" Dib asked.
"Yes....yes we are...and we are investigating the source of the RADIOACTIVE PUMPKINS....and being trapped in here with a bunch of freaks..." Agent * said.
"Wow! What branch are you guys from?"
"The Z-Files...." Agent % said.
"That's like the X-Files....right?" Dib asked.
"That's confidential..." Agent % said.
"Oh please? C'mon! You're gonna die anyway!"
"WHAT? WE ARE? WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?" Agent * screamed, "YOU'RE ON THEIR SIDE!"
"No...it said so in the script...anyway...you're not important characters and I am, so that's how I know it'll be you...not me..."
"I see...Fine..." Agent * said.
"Yes...the Z-Files are next to the X-Files...we work on the more important cases, like that of the elusive PIG FOOT!" Agent % said in a mysterious tone.
"Uh....Pig foot? That's ridiculous!"
"That's what you say...but wait until you meet the guy! then you'll have more respect for him! oooh...he's elusive!" Agent % said.
"Why are you here then? Aren't Mulder and Scully supposed to be here, I mean, this is a pretty big case..."
"Uh...yes....Mulder and Scully...they were uh...." Agent % stumbled.
"Gone! On another case [the closet door some miles away back at headquarters jiggles and you can hear Mulder's voice scream 'LEMME OUTTA HERE!']...Uh...CONFIDENTIAL! Look! A moose!" Agent * screamed pointing.
[They all looked and the two slipped back into the shadows. From outside, groans came and the evil pumpkins scratched on the door and windows to get in. And this story is really going nowhere...SOOOOOOOOOO.....uh....Brian was eaten because he ran outta the house screaming about not having enough candy.]
HOURS PASSED, THE CLOCK STRUCK 1:28AM....
[Dib slumped over on the couch, Gaz sat at the end, frowning and crossing her arms, Gretchen cried in the corner, the agents, Agent * and Agent % stood around creepily, and Zim ran about the house screaming about the Halloweenies. Blah blah blah blah....]
"Man! I'm going to go Insane if we don't get out of here soon!" Dib said.
"Not to worry young man! We're working on a way out as we speak!" Agent * said confidently.
"Yeah...what is it this time? Throw one of us at them and then try to make a break for it?"
"YES! THAT'S IT!" Agent % screamed.
"you can't be serious..." Dib said flatly.
"Who volunteers?" Agent * asked.
[Everyone looked around. It was quiet, outside and inside. Zim stopped ranting to shake his head no violently. Gaz glared at them and Dib stared with his mouth open. Suddenly, the agents leapt up and grabbed Gretchen, they flung open the door and tossed her out and Agent * ran out first, screaming as she was taken down by the pumpkins who had hideously mutated to include bodies with muscles now. Agent % screamed and ran back in, a small pumpkin without a body gnawing on his leg. That's when the Evil pumpkins started on their final attack. They swarmed the house, body parts slithering through the cracks in the boards, grabbing whoever they could. Agent % was pulled down, eaten by the pumpkins as they started shambling up to the house, horrible grinning faces, flickering with evil and death. Dib and Zim screamed as Gaz grumbled. Gir looked around and started to scream too before running out into the Zombie Pumpkins and disappearing. Dib and Zim grabbed sticks that magically appeared out of nowhere and started to fight them off.
They kept coming and coming and Gaz was soon forced to fight back as well. She kicked them and tore them apart ruthlessly while Dib and Zim battled them off with their measly little sticks.]
"Hold on a second...why does Gaz get to destroy these things and we have to hit them with 'measly little sticks'? that's not fair..."
[Because I said so...that's why...now get to whapping those pumpkins or be pumpkin meat!]
"Eeeeeee! I KNEW THIS WOULD HAPPEN! SEE WHAT YOU DID DIB?"
[They fought them off tooth and claw as they were pushed back into the kitchen where they had no choice but to go down into Zim's lair. They dragged Gaz down there and boarded that entrance shut while the Zombie Pumpkins roamed around upstairs. Suddenly, they heard a voice from above. It was terrible and raspy and...well...evil...]
"Give us the large headed one and we will go away....we need his brain meats for our leader! Give him up or suffer!" It screamed.
"WHAT! You can't be serious..." Dib said with his mouth ajar.
[Zim and Gaz looked at each other and then back at Dib. Dib turned around to see their looks and frowned, shaking his head and backing away.]
"No! No! You can't! C'mon! I'm the hero! Guys! you don't really believe them do you? Guys please! Gaz! I'm your own brother for heaven's sakes! Please! You can't do this to me! You..." Dib said as they grabbed him and lifted him above their heads. Dib kicked and struggled as they hauled him over to the exit thing.
"Well Dib...It's been nice knowing you..." Gaz said.
"All I can say is that it'll be a lot easier to take over this pathetic planet without you around Dib...See Ya!" Zim said pushing him into the elevator thingy.
[Dib screamed as he rolled over to the farthest edge of the elevator, hog tied and unmoving. Zim laughed a diabolical laugh and Gaz looked at him out of the corner of her eye, glaring at him. They sent the elevator up. Dib watched it as it closed, screaming vengeance.]
*****
[A few minuets later....]
"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....HAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAAHAH....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH...* cough cough* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...."
"Will you shut up already? You've been doing that forever..."
"Why? This is my lab...my base...my life...what are YOU gonna do about it? Little Gaz...?"
"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAeerrk!"
[Zim was cut off in the middle of his laugh by Gaz's had on his throat. She glared and threw him into the elevator and sent it up to the reaming Zombie Pumpkins that were up there looking for a good meal or a body. Zim screamed as Gaz wandered over to his computer, tapping into it and bringing up a few video games. She settled down for a long night of killing Vampire Piggies...]
DUN DUN DUN! the end....
*or so we think*