"This is a bad idea, Pete. I can't tell Chloe my secret. My parents would murder me. You should have seen the flak I caught over telling you," Clark said. "It's not that I don't trust her and want to be honest with her."
"Whoa, just breathe man. I didn't say anything about blabbing secrets. I understand why you're keeping folks out of the loop. I just think Chloe might know about any new Meteor-Mutant activity in the area. Maybe there's a mutant turning guys into girls and vice versa?" Pete said. "Get in. We're going to school. While you talk with Chloe, I'll wander down to World History and present our research paper. This way I'll save both our GPA's and maybe you'll find a clue about your transformation."
How could Pete be worried about something as unimportant as a history paper at a time like this? Clark needed him! "It all makes sense now. Sorry I took you away from your important day. Go to school. I can handle this myself. It isn't like I haven't had to deal with being an alien without your help before." Clark crossed his arms and glared at Pete.
"The estrogen is taking over," Pete mumbled under his breath. "Just take a breath man. This is a good idea. Think about it. Chloe is the God of all things weird in Smallville. If something strange is going on, she probably knows something about it. If it hadn't been for her helpful insight, I'd never have figured out what red Kryptonite does to you. Admit it, Chloe could help."
"I'll give you that. Chloe knows her meteors. So you send me down there to grill her alone? She doesn't know Clara," Clark said. "How am I supposed to approach her?"
"Unless you want to present the paper, I suggest you figure it out. Come on. This is a good plan. Stop sulking and get in the car," Pete said.
Clark wandered over to the passenger side and glared at Pete. "I am not sulking." But maybe I'm being a little unreasonable? "Let's go before you miss history. I guess I can handle Chloe."
Lana scanned the quad for a familiar face to spend her lunch break with. She spotted Chloe, alone and scribbling in a notebook. It was unusual to catch her without Clark or Pete or both of them when she was at school. "Chloe, hey. Have you had lunch?"
Chloe looked up and smiled. "Lunch? I'm trying to get the last of this algebra homework done, but I can be company. It isn't like algebra requires my full attention."
"You're better at math than me then." Lana joined Chloe at her picnic table and unwrapped her egg salad. "I was surprised to see you out here solo. What happened to your usual posse?"
"You noticed that I'm missing a couple of appendages? Clark and Pete didn't show up for class this morning. Should be sad when they try to get a make-up on their history paper presentation. Mrs. Miller does not take BS." Chloe snapped her text shut. "Sometimes I think those boys are keeping me out of the loop. Has anyone asked me to skip school? I can only assume it's guy stuff."
"So the boys are skipping? That's not good." Hopefully Clark hadn't decided to have another personality swing. Lana cringed at the thought of those couple of days when Clark had gone dark and wild. Just when you thought you knew someone, they'd go and surprise you. Well Clark had returned to normal, but Lana didn't completely trust the good-boy facade anymore.
"Um... excuse me."
Chloe looked up and smiled. An awkward girl with short dark hair had approached their picnic table. She had that look, like she wasn't comfortable in her own skin. "Hi, do I know you? You look familiar," Chloe said. "No name's coming to mind."
Lana turned and waved. "Have a seat, I'm Lana." The girl look scared, like she thought Chloe or Lana might bite. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine, wonderful, never better. I'm Clara, Pete's friend. But I'm from out of town, far away, not Metropolis, Kansas City." Clark couldn't seem to stop talking. This was not how lies worked. You weren't supposed to talk. You kept quiet unless pressed. What was wrong with him? He'd been lying as long as he'd been talking. Did testosterone help with lying? They were going to be able to tell. Chloe said he looked familiar. Did she see? "Can I talk to you, Chloe?"
Chloe frowned and arched an eyebrow. This girl was about to have a panic attack, and she'd called Chloe by name. How did this girl know her name? "Okay. In private? Excuse us, Lana."
Clark relaxed a small degree after they were out of Lana's earshot. At least he didn't have to babble in front of her any more. "I know you don't know me, and this probably seems a little strange."
"I've seen strange, this hardly qualifies as eccentric, yet. Where do I know you from 'Clara'? You obviously know me," Chloe said. She crossed her arms and waited for an explanation.
Clark had no idea where he'd slipped, but somehow Chloe knew that he knew her. "Why would you say that? I don't know you. Pete told me to talk to you." Clark knew all the blood had to have drained out of his face.
"You might as well just tell me what's going on, Clara. You're obviously not much of a liar." Chloe couldn't keep herself from smiling. Maybe a front page had wandered up and plopped down into her lap? You never knew.
Clark winced. He knew that look. That was cutthroat journalist, Chloe. "I just need to know if any new meteor freaks have cropped up lately. I know you don't know me, but I am a friend of Pete's, and I really need to know."
Chloe blinked, stared, and lost her breath. I know that puppy-dog look. I know those eyes. Clara? Clark? "Oh my God. That's not possible." Chloe leaned in closer and fingered Clara's hair. She'd seen that shirt before. It was just like the one Martha Kent wore to parent teacher day. Was she insane? Another look at those eyes decided her. "Clark? It's you isn't it?"
"I... what are you talking about? My name..." Clark stepped back and contemplated running away. She was just too sharp. Chloe might hold the key to figuring this all out though. Maybe a little truth would be enough? Clark stared at his feet and shrugged. "You got me. It's Clark. I was attacked, meteor mutant. I need leads Chloe. I can't go home like this, and I thought you might be able to help."
Chloe had been half angry with Clark since the Spring Formal. Seeing him like this, desperate and neutered. Holding on to that bit of anger was impossible. "I don't have any information for you, but you are going to be okay, Clark. I know it."
"Right, I just may have to be Clara," Clark said. "That's not such a big deal." He reached out a hand and touched Chloe's cheek. You should have kissed her more while you were still a guy. "Tell Pete if you see him that I went home. I have to stop being a chicken and touch base with my parents."
Chloe nodded and let him... her... walk away. Dazedly she made her way back to the picnic table and started piling her books up. Clark was a woman? It was just insane. There had to be something she could do. A man that beautiful, it just wasn't fair. They had to fix him.
"Is everything okay? That girl seemed pretty upset," Lana said. Whatever had the twitchy girl upset, seemed to have upset Chloe too. She looked awfully pale and confused.
Chloe stared at Lana, too shell-shocked to fake a smile. "She has good reason. I have to get some research done. I'll see you."
Pete made his way into the Torch's office and scanned for Clark. He was supposed to have met Pete at the car, but he hadn't shown. He must have gotten some good information from Chloe. Well, there was Chloe, bent over her laptop scrolling seriously, but no Clark. "Hey, did my friend Clara stop by? I told her you could hook her up with some good meteor rock information."
Chloe stared at Pete and batted her eyes dramatically. "Clark told me everything."
Clark had told Chloe everything? "You're kidding? The estrogen is screwing with that boy's head. He'll probably be telling Lex Luthor he's an alien next. His parents are not going to be happy."
Chloe frowned and came to her feet. "Pete, Clark isn't an alien. He was attacked by a meteor mutant..." Where had that come from? Clark was an alien...
Stupid, stupid, stupid, Pete grinned and nodded. "You're right, absolutely. I was just kidding. Watched a Roswell marathon last night and I was going for the laugh. You're not laughing." The Kents were going to murder him. I've known Clark's secret for what, two weeks? I'm slipping it to everybody I talk to.
"An alien?" Chloe whispered. "You said Clark was an alien. As a joke?"
Author's Note:
I almost lost the silly inspiration after watching Red. Am I the only person who spent the entire episode with their head covered by a pillow telling themselves that it was just a TV show?