Disclaimer: I have no intention of saying that I own everything in this story. My mind's not worthy. Sirius Black, James Potter, Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew, Lily Evans (and everything wizarding and/ or witchcraft in nature), Ms. JK Rowling created them. I'm but a mere fan. As for the other girl characters (Lae Bevin, Gin Plata-Connor, JK R'phael and Professor Kiadara Wildfire) my friends and I own them. I repeat: They are not from any of the HP books. "STIGMATIZED" is by The Calling J
Author's notes: This is a songfic inspired by the song "Could it be any Harder" by The Calling. I've divided the verses and made a story out of the lyrics. Each chapter is titled by lines of other alternative songs (except chapter 6: the line came from Could it be any Harder) The lyrics of the song are enclosed in the ! J anyway… enuf of my introduction… I love SIRIUS BLACK! (Thanks ALEX BAND and AARON KAMIN for writing this heartfelt song. You have eternally changed my life.)
Of Wizards and Faerys: Chapter 4 "if I give up on you… I give up on me… If we fight what's true, Will we ever be…"
Could it be any harder
To say goodbye and without you
Could it be any harder
To watch you go…
To face what's true…
"Sirius, Hi,"
Lily greeted Sirius when she opened the door and saw Sirius standing outside.
"Hey, Lily. Is Lae still in?"
He asked and tried to peek inside the room. Lily opened the door and gave Sirius a slight push.
"Get in there, before somebody sees you here." She said.
Sirius turned around and asked, "Everyone decent?"
A pair of arms enveloped around him.
"Hey, sexy…"
Lae greeted with a kiss on the back of his neck. Sirius moved to turn around.
"No, wait. Not everyone's dressed up quite good enough, yet." Lae said.
"Meaning she's only wearing her skirt and only lingerie on top." Gin said.
Sirius turned around almost instantly and wrapped his arms around her hips. Lae kissed him with much passion.
"Hmm… good morning, Black. Nice of you to drop by," she whispered with a twisted smile and a tighter hug.
"Lae, can we talk?" Sirius stepped back and looked in her eyes.
"What? Can't I give my boyfriend a worthy thank you for the elegant necklace I was given last night?"
Lae pouted. Her blue-green eyes glinted with happiness. Sirius looked at her with a plain look.
"Whoa… alright." Lae let him go.
"Give me 5 minutes to finish up." She said. She held his hand and pulled him to her bed.
"Privacy please", she mouthed to her roommates.
"JK, weren't we supposed to meet Alex for that song this morning at breakfast?"
Gin said as she collected her things.
"Yeah, I know. He must be flaring up by now…" JK hurriedly took her bag and walked out of the room.
"What's up, Sirius? You seem bothered."
Lae took her blouse from her bed and put it on. Sirius pulled her closer and buttoned it for her.
"Are you happy?" he asked without looking at her. Anxiety.
Lae watched him as he slowly fastened each button.
"Right now? Yes." She answered.
"Are you happy with us?" Fear.
She held his hands.
"Sirius Black, didn't we agree that we wouldn't have any of these non-sense arguments?" she asked.
"Yes but…" he couldn't say it.
"I know you're scared. Sirius, look, don't worry about me. I am happy, very much." She comforted.
"I know… it's just that…" he paused and wrapped his arms gradually around her waist.
"I don't wanna say goodbye." He continued.
"You think I do?" Lae pushed him away fraily.
"Tell me what I can do to stop you from going," he begged.
"You can't really do anything." She said as turned the other way and started with her necktie.
"Don't you have some kind of choice?" he asked as he stood from the bed.
"I do," she uttered.
"What are they then? They're probably better than leaving." He almost shouted.
"No." she said plainly.
"Talk to me, Lae!" he whirled her around easily. "What other choices do we have?!" Sirius' strong side took over. Rage.
"You wouldn't want to hear it."
She said firmly, without a hint of whatever feeling in her eyes and voice. Tranquility.
"Oh, well, try me first, ok?" Exasperation.
"There must be a way. I mean, your mum and dad… they're still together now, aren't they?" he asked.
Lae picked up her cloak.
"There's only one way I know of… so I could stay with you," she said as she fixed her hair.
"Well?" Sirius waited. "I wont do it," she said as she transfixed her gaze on him.
"Don't you love me? Why won't you do it? Cant I do it?" Sirius panicked.
"Megan, what the hell is it? Tell me, alright?!" he shook her vigorously.
"You don't understand, Sirius. I do love you. I love you so much that leaving is the only way I could prove it," she bellowed.
The Great Hall was almost empty when Sirius and Lae went down. They only had time to grab some toasts and they rushed off to Defense Against the Dark Arts.
"Well, Mr. Black and Ms. Bevin, nice of you to join us." Professor Kiadara Wildfire greeted them.
"Sorry, Professor." Lae uttered as she brushed off toast crumbs from her mouth.
"Take your seats," she said and went on with the class.
~ * ~ * ~
If I only had one more day…
"How long?"
Sirius asked Lae as they walked to Runes after lunch.
"Till what?" Lae asked.
"How long till you leave?" he asked. Lae sighed.
"Honestly," she stopped and looked at Sirius. "On my birthday." She said. Sirius was aghast.
"March?!" he exclaimed.
"So I was told… but it may be sooner… or later. I'm not sure. But when the time comes, I'll know."
***
"When she turns eighteen!" Sirius bashed the small chest on his bedside table.
Remus, James, Peter and Alex had called Gin to stabilize Sirius.
"It's January for crying out loud! And her birthday's on March!" He kicked his closet and damaged a hole on it.
"Sirius, calm down." Gin said.
"Imagine wasting all this time! Argh!"
Another hole on the closet. He failed to stop himself from breakingdown.
"I don't know what to do anymore…" he cried. Gin ran to him and held him in her arms.
"I just don't want to lose her but it feels like I am… slowly… every single day…" his shoulders shook as he spoke.
"Sirius, you're not," Gin comforted.
"Call Lae," she mouthed to the guys. Alex rushed out of the room.
"Every time I look at her, I can't stop myself from thinking… worrying about tomorrow." He pulled away from Gin and hit the wall forcefully.
"ARGH! Why does this have to be so hard?!" he screamed.
"Sirius, that's the way things are meant to be. This is your reality. And you have to feel it."
Sirius walked to the window and pounded his fist on the ledge.
Lae and Alex had entered the room without Sirius noticing it.
"I've never loved this way before. And I can't imagine why this has to happen. Especially to us," he buried his face in his hands.
"If I only knew all this earlier then I wouldn't have wasted so much time." He uttered.
Lae ran to him and hugged him tightly from the behind.
"Sirius, I'm scared." She cried. He took her in his arms and let her cry on his shoulder.
"I don't wanna see you crying," she whispered. "It makes me more scared than I already am." She uttered.
"I don't wanna leave," she sobbed. "But I really really have to…" she pulled him closer and held him tighter.
"we live our lives… I know we're gonna find a way…"
-more in chapter 5-
AN: ?! reviews? LaEnAn-DeVnEt-BeViN J