"Get away from me you icky, slimy." Buffy never had a chance to finish her little tirade. The demon fell at her feet covered in its own slimy blood; a large chunk missing from it's left shoulder all the way down to its waist. Behind it, a grinning and cocky Spike stood with battle-axe in hand. "Hello love, glad to see me?" he asked jovially. "I was fine." She answered shortly. Spike took of after her as she hurried away through the sewer to the ladder that would lead her to the surface. "Now love, there is no need to be like this." Spike almost sounded like he was begging. "There is EVERY need, I have great need! I'm really really needy!" she screamed at him. When Buffy got upset, she tended to ignore not only the English language, but human logic and reason. Safe to say, she was not only upset, but confused as well on this particular occasion. It had been less than a day since she had cast a spell on her sister, removing the mystical 'key' part of her and transferring it into something small. Something that Buffy could keep on her at all times. However, as with most things in the universe, nothing went the way Buffy thought it would. OK, so not having to sleep with Spike was a plus at least to start with. But then she'd ended up sleeping with him anyway! How did that happen? Willow had explained to them both that it was the spell, no real feelings needed to be involved for it to happen and it was best forgotten. But the more Buffy tried to forget the more it plagued her. She couldn't get the feeling of burning out of her mind, the way her skin felt alive and how he had soothed her with his touch. It also didn't help that he wore his half of the key right out in the open. It sat perfectly in the hollow of his throat just above the line of his shirt so her eyes were drawn to it. She ignored how safe it looked there, how easily he wore the responsibility with never a complaint about it. There had been talk at one point of taking it off him and giving it to Giles for safe keeping, that was forgotten however when it turned out the clasps could not be undone on either chain. Buffy had sworn some and then suggested breaking the chain and simply buying a new one. It was decided however that would be a bad idea, and Spikes half of the key would remain exactly that, his half, to care for as best he could. "Slayer stop. Buffy!" he called after her. Buffy stopped one hand on the ladder to the surface and safety. Something about the way he sad he name stopped her cold. Spike moved up behind her and she could feel his presence. feel him get closer as if her skin could sense it. "Slayer this is ridiculous, we can't keep this up." He almost whispered. Buffy took a deep breath. She would be mature, she could do this. She could work this out with him for the fate of the world was shared evenly between them now. "I know. I'm sorry. I just. we just, you know what we did and. I didn't." Buffy looked up at him helplessly. "Do. Do you regret it pet?" he asked. "We helped Dawn, and it was worth it." She mumbled softly. "Slayer. Buffy, that's not what I meant." Buffy looked up into his clear blue eyes and for just a moment it didn't matter that he was a vampire, that he had been dead for the last 126 years. that on numerous occasions he had tried to kill her. He was a man then, and for as long as Buffy lived that would be the moment when her clear black and white world changed to a dizzying array of grays. Spike was just a man, special circumstances yes but where they any different to Oz's really? Oz locked himself up to keep from hurting people; Spike had long ago stopped trying to get rid of the chip. Spike fought on the side of good, and he loved Dawn as much as she did. In that moment, Buffy truly believed that he loved her to. "Spike. it was a spell, and now its done, and I don't think we should dwell on it anymore. There would just be badness." she smiled at him bravely and looked up through the manhole that lead up into the sunlit street. She suddenly felt guilty about leaving him down here to walk back to the crypt by himself in the dark. She let go of the ladder and looked at him smiling slightly, Spike hardly noticed, he had the look of a broken man about him. "C'mon Spike. I'll walk you back to your crypt." Spike hefted the Battle-axe so the handle rested on his shoulder with the head of the axe behind him. He managed to smile, how he'll never know but he did it, then as brightly as his now broken undead heart could manage, he made conversation with her all the way back to his crypt. They were buddies; at least he could say that. Friends? Partners maybe? In any event, he could do this. He could follow her perfect sent (and perfect ass) around until the end of the world. He could take care of her and watch over her and never touch her skin again. Unbidden came flashes of that night. Smooth, hot, slayer skin and blonde hair, arms as strong as his gripping his shoulders and whimpering for him. He shook his head to clear it away but it lingered as it always did. She had been out of control, under a spell, a spell they started together. She hadn't really wanted it. Spike had always been sure that if he could just make her want him once, just once, for a split second, then he could make her love him. Make her see him as more than a monster that prowled around and occasionally helped her when it served his own ends. His ends were to be near her. To be by her side always. It hadn't worked like that. She had wanted him, she had taken him as surely as he had taken her and now she stood before him, friendlier perhaps but no more in love with him than last week. He couldn't understand why. Soul or no soul, Spike was a romantic being, in the innermost depths of his not soul, he knew, he just KNEW that if you loved someone, if you were good for them, then the fairytale ending was possible, indeed unavoidable. Why hadn't it been like that for him? Why didn't the ending he knew he was heading towards happen? Hadn't he been patient? Hadn't he done everything in his power? Short of becoming a man again what more could he do? Spike stopped and Buffy who'd been jabbering on about something was some ways ahead before she realized it. "Spike? Are you OK?" she asked worriedly Worried? She was worried about him! Spike shook his head a little and looked down at an expectant little face with bright hazel eyes. Her hair had been pulled back perfectly when she left the house but not a few blonde locks had escaped and hung around her face. God she was beautiful. "Nothing Slayer. just havin' a thought." He smiled softly and fought the urge to reach out and touch her face with the back of one undead finger. Undead. he was undead all over and she would never have him that way. All right, his romanticism never considered that it would be impossible, that Angel had wanted this longer than him and had never found a way. Failure was not an option. He would become a man again, and Buffy would love him. "You thinking is dangerous, what'ya thinkin'?" she smiled softly. It was a friendly kind of dig. He liked that. "Nothin' pet, it's OK. I think I wanna talk to the witches though. Need a little help with something," Buffy looked at him hard and put her delicate little hands on her hips in annoyance. "OK, back to not trusting Spike mode, what are you up to?" she demanded. "Birthday present for you Pet," he only half lied right? Buffy blinked, "I'm not sure how to go about it though so I need to talk to the Witches, Red knows you better than anyone right?" Buffy was lost for words. Spike was going to do something for her birthday? She knew he was a party animal and really once you got past his annoying habit of being right all the time, he was actually kinda fun, and funny. "You. you want to do something for my birthday?" she just looked at him. "Sure pet. we have the friends thing down now right?" he smiled his best smile for her and looked down at her with his ice blue eyes, "Friends do this kinda stuff for each other." Buffy laughed softly and gave him a quick cuddle around his middle. Or at least that had been the plan. When Spikes arm's wrapped themselves around her shoulders the plan was altered, just a little. She was going to look up and smile at him, then pull away. That plan went out the window when the locket around Buffy's neck began to tingle and glow, Spikes did the same and the two blonde's looked at each other seemingly unable to move. Plan number three was more or less asking what the hell was going on, but as Buffy couldn't seem to make her brain work, that plan was forgotten too. Spike's arms tightened around her slightly and, as fast as it had come, it was gone. The glowing the tingling the whole bit. "That was. neat," Spike mumbled. "That.it tingled." Spike's arms were showing no sign of loosening around her shoulders and Buffy wasn't really sure how to say anything. It wasn't Uncomfortable, nor at all unpleasant. It didn't seem like Spike was going to try anything, content to hold her to him and breath in her hair. "Spike.?" she looked up at him. "Hmm? Oh, sorry love it was just," he let her go and took a step back, "Sorry," he looked down at his feet. "It's OK, it was. nice. The holding, not the tingling, well the tingling wasn't bad in a bad way either but the holding was nice. And. I'm going to shut up now." Spike raised his eyes to look at her as gently as he could manage with his blood boiling the way it was. He had dropped his battle-axe at some point and it lay forgotten in the slime on the floor. He looked at her for a long moment and then opened his arms, begging a God he hadn't spoken with for years to let her come to him. He needed to feel her right then. One hesitating step after another, Buffy moved into the comfort of his chest and rested her cheek over his non-beating heart. His arms folded around her more gently than before and he held her as if she were breakable, as if she were so precious. Buffy took a deep breath and let it out slowly, slipping her slender arms around his waist slowly. "Spike." she said softly. "Yes pet?" "You can hold me tighter. I'm the slayer, wont break." Spike smiled a little and tightened his arms around her as tightly as he could, she was right. He couldn't break her, couldn't really hurt her, not with his body. He realized that the best damage he'd ever caused her he'd done with his mouth, his biting remarks and ability to read her. He didn't want to hurt her now however so he kept his mouth shut. Buffy had never felt so held before, so truly wrapped up. She didn't for a moment think she loved him but this was safety, and for just a moment, she thought that maybe she could love him. One day. Spike sighed and threw his human idea out the window. If he were a man, he couldn't hold her like this. If he were a man she could break him, hurt him. He wanted to be her equal, her partner, and not another clinger on who needed her to protect him. He sighed to himself and rested his cheek on her head. So he'd stay a vampire, and she'd never love him, he'd live his entire unlife under her well-manicured little thumb and never get her to love him. But he could hold her, and he could protect her. maybe like Angel he'd earn his heaven in the end. He was starting to think like the poof! Ahhhhh! "Hey Slayer?" he said quietly. "Hmm?" "Almost sunset. wanna kill stuff?" he asked. She raised her eyes to look at him and smiled her impish little smile pulling a stake from her belt and twirling it John Wayne style.