Severus Snape Bumps Off Remus Lupin to Become the Most Beloved Harry Potter
Character
It was a particularly warm day in May, as Remus Lupin crossed the courtyard of Hogwarts, rounded the corner and was flattened by an anvil.
"Whoo HOOO!!" Snape yelled triumphantly, springing out from behind a corner. "Now I'M the most popular character! Chicks DIG ME! I'm not sure why." "Actually," Dumbledore said calmly as he approached from an outer corridor, "you're not even close. Next in line would be Ron."
"Damn, really?" Snape asked in amazement. "I suppose I'll have to kill him too, then."
"And then you'd have to kill Harry and Hermione."
"Fine, whatever," Snape acquiesced grudgingly.
"Followed by Fred and George, followed by Oliver Wood, and then followed by Sirius Black."
"Dammit, how many people do I have to whack around here to get some respect?!" Snape shouted.
Dumbledore gazed at him for some time, then cleared his throat. "You're fired, Snape," he said.
It was a particularly warm day in May, as Remus Lupin crossed the courtyard of Hogwarts, rounded the corner and was flattened by an anvil.
"Whoo HOOO!!" Snape yelled triumphantly, springing out from behind a corner. "Now I'M the most popular character! Chicks DIG ME! I'm not sure why." "Actually," Dumbledore said calmly as he approached from an outer corridor, "you're not even close. Next in line would be Ron."
"Damn, really?" Snape asked in amazement. "I suppose I'll have to kill him too, then."
"And then you'd have to kill Harry and Hermione."
"Fine, whatever," Snape acquiesced grudgingly.
"Followed by Fred and George, followed by Oliver Wood, and then followed by Sirius Black."
"Dammit, how many people do I have to whack around here to get some respect?!" Snape shouted.
Dumbledore gazed at him for some time, then cleared his throat. "You're fired, Snape," he said.