Lactaphobia 10
Disclaimer: The other chapters all belonged to USA, but I'm sick of it,
you hear me, sick of it. This chapter is MINE, all mine! Muahahahaha!!!!!
A/N: Sorry about that - The villain got a hold of the disclaimer. Also
sorry about the misspellings in the last chapter. (Big fat 'duh' on my
part!). And again, I'm really sorry about the format. I recommend
transferring it to a word document. That should restore it to the way it
looks on my computer, which is fine, honest!
Try to read it anyway. Love you~ LMR
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Monk did not think twice. He remembered from a conversation they'd
had a few months ago that Sharona couldn't swim. The vat was about twenty
feet deep. He jumped in. (EEEEEWWWWW!)
By the time he had gotten to her, she'd fallen below the surface. He
reached for her, but she was far below his grasp. With a groan, he dived
down into the water, and floundered around, almost reaching the bottom.
Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, he felt an arm. It seemed
lifeless, deadweight. He pulled, and after several failed attempts,
managed to reach the surface. His lungs were burning, and he didn't know
how much longer he could remain conscious. Muscles he didn't know he had
were aching. He knew Sharona wasn't very heavy, but she felt like a lead
weight trying to drag her to the top of the tank. They broke the white
surface, Adrian gasping for air, and Sharona. . .
Sharona not breathing.
The realization hit Adrian in an instant, and his heart stopped with
fear. He pulled her to the edge of the tank and laid her on the floor of
Milkman's lair.
Monk, with his all but infinite knowledge, knew how to give
artificial respiration. The thought of it, however, made him want to be
sick. All those germs. Fortunately, he had never had to. But there was
no one here. He was the only one who could save Sharona.
But the milk! So strong was Adrian's phobia that the milk actually
felt like fire as he sealed his lips around hers tentatively and started
rescue breathing. He had given her three breaths when she started
coughing. He took Sharona's cell phone from her side and called
Stottlemyer, telling him which way the Milkman had gone. He took a wet -
nap out of Sharon's purse, and started to wipe his face, covered with
disgusting milk. Fortunately, he had his toothpaste and toothbrush (and
backup toothbrushes, and backup bristles for the backup toothbrushes) with
him. He brushed furiously, keeping an eye on Sharona. She was conscious,
but not really "all there." When he was finished (exactly three minutes
later), he went to her with another wet - nap and cleaned off her face and
lips.
"Mmmmmffff." She said Her eyes were still closed. "I was going to
ask what hero saved my life, but seeing as I smell antiseptic, I don't
think I need to." She smiled. "What happened, anyway? It's a little
blurry." She paused. "Hey, do you have one of your backup toothbrushes."
She took it gratefully, the taste of bad milk nearly making her sick.
Adrian shrugged. "He tried to drown you." He brushed it off as if
it were no big deal. "I pulled you up."
Sharona was fully awake now. "Out of the milk? That milk?" She
could barely believe it.
"I had to. You might have. . ." He drifted off, not wanting to say
it.
"I don't remember that."
Adrian twitched. "You were blacked out. You weren't breathing."
Sharona was dumbfounded. "I was. . . you mean YOU. . ." A broad
grin spread across her face. "I'm so proud of you, Boss!" Before she
could stop herself, she grabbed his face and kissed him lightly on the
lips. (A/N: Take that, Monica!) "Oh, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done
that!" She fumbled for a wet - nap.
He made a dismissive motion with his hand. "It's alright. I have
come to the conclusion that you are cootie - free.
Big, bad sarcasm came out to play. "Gee, thanks, Boss."
Adrian spread his arms wide. "That was a compliment!"
"For a five - year - old, maybe!" She retorted. "Benjy is past the
cooties phase!"
Monk held his chin up. "Well, I'm not."
Sharona rolled her eyes. "Whatever." She looped her hand in his
arm, delicately, so as not to actually touch him. "Let's go tell
Stottlemyer about the heroic deeds of Monk."
Adrian laughed. "I wouldn't say heroic."
Sharona turned to face him, a look of utter solemnity on her face.
"I would."
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So there it is! Please R&R! I love you guys!
By the way, in the unbelievably wonderful film The Silence of the Lambs
(Skip the sequel), Ted Levine plays Jame Gumb, the serial killer Buffalo
Bill. He is amazing in such a challenging and just plain disturbing role.
He is almost unrecognizable. I highly reccomend that all Monk fnas go see
this movie!
