Hey! Because of all those really good reviews, I'm going to post another chapter! Thank you sooo much everyone! I think I forgot to mention this last chapter but this is a response to Kate the Great's challenge! And um, one thing. Rest in peace Richard Harris, you will be missed! I don't own any of the chapters, J. K. Rowling does, what a lucky woman! Please r/r.

Harry was stuck in the hospital wing for the rest of the day. Ron and Hermione sat on either side of him and Harry couldn't move his legs. On Dumbledore's orders Madam Pomfrey had put a spell on Harry's legs so it felt like they were glued to the bed. As much as he struggled and pulled at them they wouldn't come undone. He didn't have his wand either; it was up in his dorm. He didn't talk to Ron or Hermione at all and they didn't speak to him, probably because they didn't know how he would react.

When he was finally let out, not only Ron and Hermione but also Sirius who walked behind them as a dog escorted him back to Gryffindor Tower. He had taken the news very badly and even as a dog Harry could see his eyes full of pity and sadness. Harry hated it.

That night Sirius slept right next to Harry's bed. He was determined not to let anything happen to him again. It annoyed Harry very much.

**

Three weeks later Sirius showed no signs of letting up. He followed Harry around everywhere and was very anxious when he went to take a shower or use the bathroom. He was sure Harry was going to do something to himself in the short amount of time that he wasn't next to him. Having Sirius sleep by his bed and waking at every sudden movement meant that Harry spent the whole night in his bed and woke up from nightmares often. He constantly would dream of Sirius but a new nightmare was to haunt him, it was the same one he had been having for a week straight and it was driving him nuts. He never talked to Sirius about it though he knew when Harry would dream because he would scream and wake up suddenly.

Harry had just fallen asleep much to his dismay. It was about midnight and not being able to stay awake the nightmare started, it was a voice, and he didn't recognize it but he really didn't want to.

"Its all your fault. What do you think of that… murderer at the age of 14? You killed him. Who are you going to kill next? Who else will have to die because of you? You killed him, he would still be alive and living if it wasn't for you. You killed him, you killed him, you killed it."

Harry woke in the usual cold sweat breathing hard. He stepped over Sirius who judging by the snores had fallen asleep. He went over to the window and looked out. The air was cool on his face. He thought about the voice, it was right, he had killed Cedric. He hadn't tried to save him; he just stood there as he died. He shouldn't have even been there, why did he ever suggest for both of them to take it? He looked around him at his 4 sleeping roommates and Snuffles by his bed, how many of them would have to die before the end. And Hermione? He didn't want to put them at danger. They didn't deserve that. As much as he hated them he would never want them to die. They didn't deserve that, no one deserved death. He knew they cared about him and worried about him. If he wasn't around though they wouldn't have to worry about him, they wouldn't have to fuss over him. He didn't want them to worry about him. If he wasn't around they wouldn't have to pity him. He had been thinking about this every since the summer. Well it didn't work once but if I try again… Harry grabbed a cloak and his wand and left. He opened the door carefully and only wide enough so he could slip through.

"Good bye," he whispered and left closing the door softly.

He crossed the common room and opened the portrait. He picked up the speed and ran down the hallway and didn't respond when the Fat Lady asked where he was going. He ran for about 20 minutes up to the Astronomy Tower. He went up to the edge; even with his cloak on it was freezing. He looked down; he was up very far. He sighed, "I'm doing this for you guys. I hope you will be safe now." And he jumped. The air rushed all around him, he smiled, and it felt wonderful. It was like flying, he closed his eyes but opened them quickly. He was slowing down; he looked all around him. It felt like something was holding him up but not doing a very good job. He was stopping; he was near the ground. And then he dropped again, whatever it was had let go of him and he hit the ground painfully.

**

"Ohhhh," he put a hand to his head. Opening his eyes he looked around him, his glasses were on. "Argghh." He was back in the hospital wing.

"Harry?" Harry rolled over and sitting next to him was Sirius. Groaning he rolled back over so his back was the Sirius.

"Why Harry?" Sirius choked back tears. He had woken up just minutes after Harry had gone and in dog form he looked all over. He had been the one to find him on the ground outside.

Harry didn't respond he closed his eyes to try and block Sirius out. He hated the sound of his voice right now; it was so full of pity for him. His eyes were probably staring down at him wondering where he went wrong and he was feeling a lot of guilt.

He heard the door open and footsteps. He didn't want to look, he knew who it was. He tried to pretend to be asleep again but Sirius was talking to him and Sirius had informed him that Harry was awake.

He heard the footsteps again and they were coming his way. He shifted a little and stuffed his head under the pillow. He felt hands trying to the pillow; he fought back by grabbing even more of it. He wasn't strong though and the pillow was ripped from his hands.

"This has to stop Harry," Dumbledore said throwing the pillow on the bed next to his.

"Screw you," Harry spat.

"Mr. Potter this will stop," Dumbledore told him. "I will personally make sure you are in your bed every night and unable to move unless this stops right now."

"Go away!" Harry yelled. "I hate you, I hate both of you!"

"Sirius please escort Mr. Potter up to his dorm and make sure he doesn't leave," Dumbledore said and turned and left.

"I'm not going with you," Harry crossed his arms over his chest.

"You want to stay in the hospital wing?" Sirius asked.

"No, I'd rather just not stay anywhere," said Harry.

For the second time Sirius bent over Harry and picked him up. "Its late Harry, you need some sleep."

"No, I just need to die." Harry whispered but Sirius heard him.

**

When he finished with Harry, Dumbledore went back up to his office. He went to the fireplace and not caring about the time threw some powder in and called, "Remus Lupin, Black Mansion."

Dumbledore waited a few minutes and then Remus Lupin appeared yawning. "What is it another attack?"

"I wish it was," Dumbledore replied grimly. "No, I need your help with Harry."

"Potter?" Remus yawned again.


"The very same," Dumbledore nodded. "I'm running out of options Remus, I need your help, you have to talk to him. You are the only one who knows anything about what he is going through."

"Dumbledore I can't," Remus shook his head. "What would I say?"


"Tell him what James told you!" Dumbledore insisted.

"I'll be around soon," Remus's face disappeared from the fireplace.

Dumbledore leaned back in his chair, if this didn't work, no it had to work, it had to, it was the only plan left.

**

The next morning just as the sun came up; Harry grabbed his broom, and walked carefully out of the dorm as to not wake Sirius. He shook his head thinking it was too easy. When he reached the common room he opened the door and flew out. He sped down the hall, down the stairs, down another hall and down a few more flights of stairs. He found himself in the Entrance Hall in record time and patting his broom he dismounted so he could open the doors. Outside he jumped back on his broom and sped off towards the Pitch. He turned this way and that way, he circled the stands and the goal posts, and he flew as high as he could and went into a major dive. The wind was all around him, it went up his robes and they were lifted up, his hair was pushed back by the wind, it felt wonderful. He pulled out of the dive inches from the ground. He flew casually catching his breath. He was about to go into another dive when he noticed he was not alone and being watched and someone was clapping. The person was sitting in the stands with a broom next to him. It was the last person Harry ever expected to see with a broom, Remus. Harry flew over to him.

"I didn't know you flew," Harry said nodding to the broom next to him.

"A talent lost in the years," Remus replied.

"When did you get in?"

"This morning, I heard the party was here," Remus commented.

"Right well I'm going to keep flying," Harry turned to go.

"Do you mind if I join you?" Remus asked picking up his broom.

Harry did mind but he shrugged and Remus mounted. They flew for a few minutes without talking. Harry wished he would leave but Remus didn't seem to take the hints that Harry wanted to be left alone. "How about a race?" He asked breaking the silence.

"A race? I'm on a Firebolt," Harry pointed out.

"I know," Remus smiled as he looked at it, "Scared of losing?"

"You are on!" Harry said.

Sirius ran down the hall as a dog, he had woken up to find Harry gone, he needed to find Dumbledore. He had searched his office, the Great Hall and now was sprinting up a 4th floor corridor when he saw the aged man standing by the window looking out.

"Dumbledore!" Sirius changed back into a man and had to stop to catch his breath.

"Harry's-gone."

Dumbledore turned to look at Sirius, "Look." He pointed out the window where Remus was catching up to Harry as they rounded the polls for the first time.

"Come on Remus," Sirius shook his head and cheered on Remus. He wasn't thinking about the race though.
**

Harry couldn't believe it when he looked back and Remus was catching up. Was something wrong with the Firebolt? He didn't think so he was going very fast now. Remus grinned as he came up level with the end of the Firebolt. Come on Firebolt…come on. Harry gained more speed and lapped the polls for the second and final lap. He looked to see Remus catching up again, what was going on? Was Remus cheating? And if he was how? Harry looped the polls opposite the finishing line and tried to gain more speed. He did but still Remus was close behind. Harry crossed the line as Remus crossed a second later.

Harry slowed down and turned to face Remus, "How did you do that? How could a Nimbus keep up with a Firebolt?"

"A few speed charms," Remus admitted shrugging his shoulders, "but mostly me asking my broom to go faster."

"You asked it to go faster?"

"If you ask nicely it works," Remus smiled, "What? It always worked for me. Anyway I'm hungry lets go get something to eat." He got back on his broom and made for Hogsmeade. He had only gone a little bit when he turned back to Harry, "Are you coming?"

"It's not a Hogsmeade weekend," Harry told him.

"Dumbledore will understand. Come on, break a rule or two," Remus laughed and went off. Harry shook his head and got on his broom and followed him. Harry caught up with him and Remus smiled when he saw him, "Good boy, you are too much like your mother. Its not a Hogsmeade weekend, it doesn't matter."

They flew to the Three Broomsticks and getting off their brooms they went inside. It was mostly empty expect for a few people sitting around the counter talking to the workers and exchanging stories while eating breakfast. Harry had not known they served more than just drinks but he now knew they did. He followed Remus to the back of the room and they took a seat in the corner.

"Snuffles, James and I use to do this all the time," Remus told him as a menu appeared in front of him. "They would bewitch the food in the Great Hall so if you ate it you would turn into different birds and animals, or your tongue would feel like it was on fire and then we would treat ourselves to Three Broomsticks."

"Did you ever get caught?" Harry asked looking at his menu.

"Once they figured out where we went yes," Remus laughed. "They knew it was us, and they knew we weren't in the Great Hall and they searched the place a few times looking for us. Dumbledore came in here once to meet with a spy and what a surprise it was for him to see us. That was two weeks of detention right there."

Harry smiled weakly, as funny as it was it had been awhile since he had really been able to laugh or smile broadly, it just couldn't seem to do it. "The number 1 looks good." He said after a few minutes of silence.

"It is, that's what we always got," Remus smiled at him. Madam Rostema came a few minutes later and they ordered two number 1s.

They sat in silence for awhile; Remus looked out the window and played with his thumbs wondering if it could work. He wanted to talk to Harry, he wanted to help him but he knew that Harry would probably blow up at him. Getting up his courage he leaned forward on the table, "Harry," Remus stopped and looked around but there was no one close by, "I heard what has been going on and I just wanted to say I'm sorry."

Harry looked away quickly.

"Hear me out," Remus protested, as Harry wouldn't look at him. "I'm not sorry because what happened but how it was dealt with."

Harry continued to look away but spoke quietly, "What?"

"Um. You see Harry I understand what you are going through," Remus said even more quietly though no one was around. "When we were 6th years and Snape saw me, it was too close for my comfort. I easily could have caught up with him and bitten if I hadn't been so surprised to see him. I probably would have gotten over my surprise and bitten him if it wasn't for your father. I felt very guilty after that, I was very afraid of putting my friends into danger and I realized how much at risk I was putting them into. What if the transformation had gone wrong, what if they had been expelled because someone found out and if we were even caught. It was about a month or two afterwards that I did it. I jumped through the Astronomy tower."

Harry turned his head and looked right into Remus's eyes.

"Well before I got to the ground safely Dumbledore was there. He wanted explanations but I couldn't seem to give them. He wanted to talk but I couldn't seem to find my voice. It was very confusing and he made me very mad. He was always pressuring me to talk about it. Sirius was not helpful, he would ask me why with pity in his eyes and then of course he thought a joke would help me feel better."

"That is what I feel," Harry said. "Pressuring me and pitying me, I don't want their pity I want their help."

"Answer this for me Harry," Remus thought for a moment before continuing. "If you had a dream, a problem or a question about Voldemort who would you turn to for answers?"

"Dumbledore," Harry said and sighed hoping he wouldn't have to confront him for awhile.

Their food came at that moment and Remus did not continue until Madam Rostema was gone. He watched her retreating back and then started to eat. He considerate on eating for a few minutes but then asked Harry another question.


"If you had a problem with a girl or wanted to play a joke on someone who would you and go see?" Remus asked eating a piece of toast.

"Sirius of course," said Harry

"And if you wanted to talk about something that has been making you confused and afraid would you talk to someone who hasn't been through a similar experience or someone who knows what you are talking about?" Remus asked carefully.

"I'd go to you I guess," Harry nodded knowing where this was going.

"And if you did you would have my full attention and I would not pity you," said Remus.

"Thank you for breakfast Remus," Harry got up, picked up his Firebolt and left.

Remus got up too; he paid the bill and headed back up to school. He was deep in thought about Harry will he trust me? Will he talk to me? Can I break through that barrier?