You're So Beautiful
By: Psyche
Email: psyche_lakeshore@yahoo.com
Website: http://www.angelfire.com/anime2/paradox/
http://gundamwinghq.trifocus.net/
~~~~
~~~~
Dear Readers,
Thanx for all the reviews of the first two chapters! Well...here's Chapter III....I hope
you like it...it's slightly longer than one and two...which SHOULD make you all happy!
lol..well..ja ne!
Luvz yaz lotz!!
~~Psyche~~
~~~~
~~~~
Chapter III
~~~~
~~~~
Why was I here? I didn't really know...but it was so nice here. Peaceful...I had already
grown used to the feel of power radiating from the people around me as they sparred.
It was a wonderful feeling. A feeling of safety.
Not like when I had been with Mamoru. With the Senshi. When I had been alone...
lost...
When I became sightless.
I felt safe here. They were an amazing group of people...
There was Bulma, who had to be the smartest person in the universe.
There was Trunks, like a brother to me. He treated me like a sister...even though he
could never replace Shingo...no one could replace the ones I had lost.
There was ChiChi...who was more like my father, Kenji, than anyone else. She was
overprotective. It was a comfort to know that she thought of me as her own daughter.
There was Vegeta. Who tried so hard to be arrogant and angry at everyone. He is
probably one of the nicest people I've ever met. He cares for me...like a daughter. I can
tell by the way he speaks to me. All the little things he does to help me.
There is Goku. Seemingly clueless. Seemingly gentle. But one of the strongest people
I know. He treats me like a daughter...not as a blind person. And for that, I am so very
grateful.
And there is Gohan. My best friend. We do everything together...and I care for him so
much. I love him. But he doesn't know. He doesn't realize that whenever he flirts with
me playfully, he makes my heart quicken and my mind go blank...my cheeks flush...and
I'm completely confused...
...but still...It was peaceful here. Serene...
~~~~
I sat alone in my room, by the window...feeling the warm sun on my face. The soft
breezefilled with the scent of cherry blossoms that made its way around my room and
back again.
And it was times like these that I let myself remember what things were like before...
Before I was blind.
I remember Mamoru. The bastard of a boyfriend...using me...abusing me...and I hadn't
even thought of saying a word to the others. I was content to be with him...it was my
destiny. I was his perfect barbie doll...the Moon Princess...Sailor Moon. He didn't love
me, though I told him countless times that I loved him...bastard...
I remember Rei. My so-called best friend. I can't believe it. The irony of it all....It
wasn't until I was blind that I realized the truth had been right in front of my eyes.
Mamoru and Rei had betrayed me...for their own gain. Their own purposes. Cheating.
Breaking my heart...
I remember the Senshi. Ami. Makoto. Minako. I love them so much. Yet...when I
became a burden too big to handle, they deserted me. Ami went off to college without
a single goodbye. Makoto left for a tour of the world, learning the different dishes they
made. And Minako...dear Minako...Just disappeared. I'm not sure...but she most likely
returned to England...Luna and Artemis...with her.
I remember the Outers...I missed them so much. They had been gone for years. Along
with baby Hotaru. Did they even know this had happened to me? Did they? If they did,
why hadn't they come to help me yet...?
And what made it worse, was that the memories faded more and more every day. In my
dreams, I couldn't see anything but blurs of those I had once cared about...
...I couldn't stop the long tear that made its way down my cheek at the thought. And
before I could reach up to wipe it away, another hand appeared, brushing it, and the
tears that began to follow, away.
"Usagi...are you okay?" A voice whispers..Vegeta.
"What? Of course I am..." I whisper trying to pretend like nothing was bothering me...and failing.
He sighed, sitting next to me. "You seem sad, Usagi. What's wrong?"
"Nothing-"
"-stop lying, Usagi!" He sudden hissed, interupting me. "You know that I know the
truth. I know that you are sad...I just don't know why..."
"I'm blind, Vegeta, isn't that reason enough?" I whisper in slight anger. Why did he
to come and bother me now of all times...
I could hear him sigh. "If that was the reason, then you would have been sad long ago.
Something's happened, Usagi, and it has made you very sad." He trailed off. "...I know
you've been through a lot. But you can talk to me...you can trust me with your secrets.
I have no one to tell..."
I sighed, turning away from him. My sightless eyes staring blankly out the window...into
the sun...
"So. What's really wrong, Usagi?"
I pause. Should I tell him? Would he laugh at me? I wasn't sure...but...I had to trust
someone...
"It's really many things, Vegeta. Memories really. Or the lack thereof. I used to be able
to see their faces so easily. My parents. My friends. Mamo-chan. I could see them all,
even if it was in my dreams. Now...it's all blurred. I can't even remember what I look
like anymore....then there are times I do remember...but..." My voice trailed off. Could
I tell him about the betrayal. I hadn't told anyone about it. No one. Not even Gohan.
Could I tell him?
Vegeta seemed to sense my delema...His hand rested on my shoulder. "Usagi. I
consider you to be the daughter I never have. You may not be a Saiyan, but you have
the heart of one. You can tell me..." (AN: As you can see, I prefer Vegeta to be like a
father figure to Usagi than anything romantic or a mean person...ya know? like in my
other fic, Fatherly Love...lol...well...on w/ the fic! lol)
I thought for a moment. "I never told this to any of you...but...I had a boyfriend named
Mamoru before the fire..."
~~Flashback~~
I stared down at the cookies I had made...they were shaped like bunnies and hearts. I
made them out of love...for him.
Yet...
They were spilled out over the floor. He hated them. He said they were disgusting...and
then...and then...
I reached up slowly and touched my cheek, wincing at the bruise that was forming there.
But...he didn't mean it. He loved me. I knew he did...
~~End Flashback~~
"...but he wasn't what he seemed. I thought he loved me. But the moment I lost my
sight, he left me...with my best friend...Rei. The others...my so-called friends, deserted
me. I was too much of a burden to handle, and they left..."
I could feel his eyes on me as I spoke. The compassion in his voice as he spoke...
"There's more...isn't there, Usagi?" He whispered.
Again I paused, thinking of how to phrase this without giving away the entire truth.
Finally, I decided on what to say. "Are you in love with Bulma, Vegeta?"
"What?" He whispered, shocked.
"Let me rephrase that, have you ever been in love?"
His voice softened at this. "Is that it, Usagi? Are you in love?" He paused, and when I
didn't respond, he continued. "Who is it, Usagi?" His voice a whisper.
I shook my head. I could tell him how I felt, that was easy...but to tell him that I was in
love with my best friend...that was crazy! Especially considering that he didn't like Gohan
or Goku very much.
He sighed. "You should tell him, Usagi. I'm sure that he loves you as much as you love
him..."
There was a long silence between us before I replied, my voice barely audible, even to
his Saiyan ears.
"How could he love me...how could he love a blind person..." And I turned away, I had
just confessed some of my deepest feelings...my deepest secrets. I didn't know if I could
handle telling him any more...
Again, he sighed, and slowly stood up, leaving me to my thoughts...
And that was all I had. The room was silent...the smell of cherry blossoms had long ago
disappeared as the wind faded away into nothing. The sun had already begun to set,
and a slight chill was begining to replace it. And I welcomed the new feeling.
Maybe. Maybe if I let it get cold enough...I could become numb. The rest of my senses
would go away with the warm sun...and I could finally be at peace with myself. But that
wasn't likely to happen.
Reaching up, I found the latch to the window and closed it. Then followed the normal
number of steps to my bed, laying down...
To sleep...to dream...to remember...
To love.
~~~~
It was completely dark...but I was used to it. Like I was used to the knowledge that I
would never see again.
...But the sounds. They were so real. Laughter. And I could feel myself spinning and
spinning...The voices, answering my yells. And I smiled.
The warm sun was on my face as I spun. The feeling of the grass on my bare feet was
something I hadn't experienced in a long time. And I loved it. I could hear a giggle to
my left...and laugh to my right...footsteps running behind me...
"Marco!" I yelled out.
"Polo!" Came the reply, and I smiled. I rushed towards the closest voice, narrowly
missing. I could feel the fabric as it brushed past my fingers.
"Marco!" I called out again, and again I heard the reply.
"Polo!"
I smiled to myself. They wouldn't get away this time...And I felt the fabric on my fingers
again as I jumped towards the clostest voice...I pulled myself towards them, as we all
laughed. "I caught you." I whispered, brushing my hands across his face...
His face. I traced it...feeling the contures. I felt his soft, short hair. His chin. His nose.
His eyes. His lips. He was smiling, holding in his laughter as I explored his face with my
hands.
"I caught you, Gohan." I whispered, slowly removing the blindfold that held my sight at
bay...And stared into his eyes...his beautiful eyes. "I love you." And I kissed him-
~~~~
I gasped awake. "Gohan..." I whispered softly. It had been so real. And he had been
so beautiful. The colors had been so vivid. The sounds so real. The light so bright and
warm. The feeling of his lips on mine...
And for the first time since the fire...
I found myself sobbing on my pillow...crying at the knowledge that I could never see
him.That I could never tell him that I loved him...that he could never be mine like I was
already his...
~~~~
Eight in the morning. It was pure torture...pure joy. A paradox. It was the nervousness.
What would I say? What would I do?
I wasn't sure. For almost a year now, every morning at eight, Gohan would come over
and tutor me...
I hadn't had much human contact since the fire. Almost none at all since the betrayal.
Bulma, Vegeta, Trunks, Gohan, Goku, ChiChi, and the rest of the Zfighters were the only
ones I had ever really talked to. I hadn't gone out shopping but only a few times...it had
been too much for me to handle. The people. I could feel them staring at me...judging
me. Blind.
They were more blind to the truth than I was. They were blind to the fact that I could
take care of myself. Blind to the fact that I was still a person.
After the experience, I refused to go out with them. I didn't want pity.
The bell rang right on schedule, and I opened the door, letting Gohan in. I could feel his
ki...barely. I wasn't as strong as they were, so I couldn't feel the energy as easily as
they could, but oddly enough, I could sense high power levels...such as Gohan's, Goku's,
Trunk's and Vegeta's.
"Ohayo, Gohan-chan." I smile at him.
"Ohayo, Usa-chan." He replied. "Come on, Usa-chan! I want you to meet some of my
friends!" And before I could react, he was pulling me out the door, I almost stumbled
as he dragged me along.
I began to panic.
"UM...Gohan...stop...please..." I gasped out. "I...You know that I don't like to meet new
people!"
"Come on! You'll LOVE them!" He was laughing...and I was *really* beginning to panic.
"Gohan! Please let go of me! I..I wanna go back home!!" I hissed.
Suddenly, we both stopped. The smell of roses filled the air...and I heard a slight gasp
in front of me.
"Usagi...these are my friends-"
A familiar voice interupted him. "Hello, Koneko...it's been a long time."
"We missed you..." A softer more feminine voice whispered.
"We were worried about you..." Another whispered...
"Haruka-papa...who's that?" A little voice asked.
And I gasped. "Haruka...Michiru...Setsuna...Hotaru..." I whispered.
"You know them, Usa-chan?" Gohan asked.
My eyes narrowed, "Yes...let's go, Gohan." And I turned to leave. They were back. And
I didn't want to know...had they known all along that I was blind?
A hand caught mine. "Wait, Koneko...what's wrong?" Haruka whispered. I stopped,
but didn't answer. "Look at me..." She continued.
I turned towards her voice slightly. "I can't, Haruka." I whispered.
I couldn't see her...but I knew what she was doing long before she removed the
sunglasses I had long ago begun to wear...and I knew she was staring into my sightless
eyes.
"What happened to you, Koneko." She whispered, her voice broken.
I almost cried right then...they hadn't known. The Outers hadn't known.
"I-I'm blind, Haruka."
~~~~
~~~~
Well...REVIEW! smiles innocently...k? ja ne!
Email me!!!
psyche_lakeshore@yahoo.com
Thanx!
~~Psyche~~
By: Psyche
Email: psyche_lakeshore@yahoo.com
Website: http://www.angelfire.com/anime2/paradox/
http://gundamwinghq.trifocus.net/
~~~~
~~~~
Dear Readers,
Thanx for all the reviews of the first two chapters! Well...here's Chapter III....I hope
you like it...it's slightly longer than one and two...which SHOULD make you all happy!
lol..well..ja ne!
Luvz yaz lotz!!
~~Psyche~~
~~~~
~~~~
Chapter III
~~~~
~~~~
Why was I here? I didn't really know...but it was so nice here. Peaceful...I had already
grown used to the feel of power radiating from the people around me as they sparred.
It was a wonderful feeling. A feeling of safety.
Not like when I had been with Mamoru. With the Senshi. When I had been alone...
lost...
When I became sightless.
I felt safe here. They were an amazing group of people...
There was Bulma, who had to be the smartest person in the universe.
There was Trunks, like a brother to me. He treated me like a sister...even though he
could never replace Shingo...no one could replace the ones I had lost.
There was ChiChi...who was more like my father, Kenji, than anyone else. She was
overprotective. It was a comfort to know that she thought of me as her own daughter.
There was Vegeta. Who tried so hard to be arrogant and angry at everyone. He is
probably one of the nicest people I've ever met. He cares for me...like a daughter. I can
tell by the way he speaks to me. All the little things he does to help me.
There is Goku. Seemingly clueless. Seemingly gentle. But one of the strongest people
I know. He treats me like a daughter...not as a blind person. And for that, I am so very
grateful.
And there is Gohan. My best friend. We do everything together...and I care for him so
much. I love him. But he doesn't know. He doesn't realize that whenever he flirts with
me playfully, he makes my heart quicken and my mind go blank...my cheeks flush...and
I'm completely confused...
...but still...It was peaceful here. Serene...
~~~~
I sat alone in my room, by the window...feeling the warm sun on my face. The soft
breezefilled with the scent of cherry blossoms that made its way around my room and
back again.
And it was times like these that I let myself remember what things were like before...
Before I was blind.
I remember Mamoru. The bastard of a boyfriend...using me...abusing me...and I hadn't
even thought of saying a word to the others. I was content to be with him...it was my
destiny. I was his perfect barbie doll...the Moon Princess...Sailor Moon. He didn't love
me, though I told him countless times that I loved him...bastard...
I remember Rei. My so-called best friend. I can't believe it. The irony of it all....It
wasn't until I was blind that I realized the truth had been right in front of my eyes.
Mamoru and Rei had betrayed me...for their own gain. Their own purposes. Cheating.
Breaking my heart...
I remember the Senshi. Ami. Makoto. Minako. I love them so much. Yet...when I
became a burden too big to handle, they deserted me. Ami went off to college without
a single goodbye. Makoto left for a tour of the world, learning the different dishes they
made. And Minako...dear Minako...Just disappeared. I'm not sure...but she most likely
returned to England...Luna and Artemis...with her.
I remember the Outers...I missed them so much. They had been gone for years. Along
with baby Hotaru. Did they even know this had happened to me? Did they? If they did,
why hadn't they come to help me yet...?
And what made it worse, was that the memories faded more and more every day. In my
dreams, I couldn't see anything but blurs of those I had once cared about...
...I couldn't stop the long tear that made its way down my cheek at the thought. And
before I could reach up to wipe it away, another hand appeared, brushing it, and the
tears that began to follow, away.
"Usagi...are you okay?" A voice whispers..Vegeta.
"What? Of course I am..." I whisper trying to pretend like nothing was bothering me...and failing.
He sighed, sitting next to me. "You seem sad, Usagi. What's wrong?"
"Nothing-"
"-stop lying, Usagi!" He sudden hissed, interupting me. "You know that I know the
truth. I know that you are sad...I just don't know why..."
"I'm blind, Vegeta, isn't that reason enough?" I whisper in slight anger. Why did he
to come and bother me now of all times...
I could hear him sigh. "If that was the reason, then you would have been sad long ago.
Something's happened, Usagi, and it has made you very sad." He trailed off. "...I know
you've been through a lot. But you can talk to me...you can trust me with your secrets.
I have no one to tell..."
I sighed, turning away from him. My sightless eyes staring blankly out the window...into
the sun...
"So. What's really wrong, Usagi?"
I pause. Should I tell him? Would he laugh at me? I wasn't sure...but...I had to trust
someone...
"It's really many things, Vegeta. Memories really. Or the lack thereof. I used to be able
to see their faces so easily. My parents. My friends. Mamo-chan. I could see them all,
even if it was in my dreams. Now...it's all blurred. I can't even remember what I look
like anymore....then there are times I do remember...but..." My voice trailed off. Could
I tell him about the betrayal. I hadn't told anyone about it. No one. Not even Gohan.
Could I tell him?
Vegeta seemed to sense my delema...His hand rested on my shoulder. "Usagi. I
consider you to be the daughter I never have. You may not be a Saiyan, but you have
the heart of one. You can tell me..." (AN: As you can see, I prefer Vegeta to be like a
father figure to Usagi than anything romantic or a mean person...ya know? like in my
other fic, Fatherly Love...lol...well...on w/ the fic! lol)
I thought for a moment. "I never told this to any of you...but...I had a boyfriend named
Mamoru before the fire..."
~~Flashback~~
I stared down at the cookies I had made...they were shaped like bunnies and hearts. I
made them out of love...for him.
Yet...
They were spilled out over the floor. He hated them. He said they were disgusting...and
then...and then...
I reached up slowly and touched my cheek, wincing at the bruise that was forming there.
But...he didn't mean it. He loved me. I knew he did...
~~End Flashback~~
"...but he wasn't what he seemed. I thought he loved me. But the moment I lost my
sight, he left me...with my best friend...Rei. The others...my so-called friends, deserted
me. I was too much of a burden to handle, and they left..."
I could feel his eyes on me as I spoke. The compassion in his voice as he spoke...
"There's more...isn't there, Usagi?" He whispered.
Again I paused, thinking of how to phrase this without giving away the entire truth.
Finally, I decided on what to say. "Are you in love with Bulma, Vegeta?"
"What?" He whispered, shocked.
"Let me rephrase that, have you ever been in love?"
His voice softened at this. "Is that it, Usagi? Are you in love?" He paused, and when I
didn't respond, he continued. "Who is it, Usagi?" His voice a whisper.
I shook my head. I could tell him how I felt, that was easy...but to tell him that I was in
love with my best friend...that was crazy! Especially considering that he didn't like Gohan
or Goku very much.
He sighed. "You should tell him, Usagi. I'm sure that he loves you as much as you love
him..."
There was a long silence between us before I replied, my voice barely audible, even to
his Saiyan ears.
"How could he love me...how could he love a blind person..." And I turned away, I had
just confessed some of my deepest feelings...my deepest secrets. I didn't know if I could
handle telling him any more...
Again, he sighed, and slowly stood up, leaving me to my thoughts...
And that was all I had. The room was silent...the smell of cherry blossoms had long ago
disappeared as the wind faded away into nothing. The sun had already begun to set,
and a slight chill was begining to replace it. And I welcomed the new feeling.
Maybe. Maybe if I let it get cold enough...I could become numb. The rest of my senses
would go away with the warm sun...and I could finally be at peace with myself. But that
wasn't likely to happen.
Reaching up, I found the latch to the window and closed it. Then followed the normal
number of steps to my bed, laying down...
To sleep...to dream...to remember...
To love.
~~~~
It was completely dark...but I was used to it. Like I was used to the knowledge that I
would never see again.
...But the sounds. They were so real. Laughter. And I could feel myself spinning and
spinning...The voices, answering my yells. And I smiled.
The warm sun was on my face as I spun. The feeling of the grass on my bare feet was
something I hadn't experienced in a long time. And I loved it. I could hear a giggle to
my left...and laugh to my right...footsteps running behind me...
"Marco!" I yelled out.
"Polo!" Came the reply, and I smiled. I rushed towards the closest voice, narrowly
missing. I could feel the fabric as it brushed past my fingers.
"Marco!" I called out again, and again I heard the reply.
"Polo!"
I smiled to myself. They wouldn't get away this time...And I felt the fabric on my fingers
again as I jumped towards the clostest voice...I pulled myself towards them, as we all
laughed. "I caught you." I whispered, brushing my hands across his face...
His face. I traced it...feeling the contures. I felt his soft, short hair. His chin. His nose.
His eyes. His lips. He was smiling, holding in his laughter as I explored his face with my
hands.
"I caught you, Gohan." I whispered, slowly removing the blindfold that held my sight at
bay...And stared into his eyes...his beautiful eyes. "I love you." And I kissed him-
~~~~
I gasped awake. "Gohan..." I whispered softly. It had been so real. And he had been
so beautiful. The colors had been so vivid. The sounds so real. The light so bright and
warm. The feeling of his lips on mine...
And for the first time since the fire...
I found myself sobbing on my pillow...crying at the knowledge that I could never see
him.That I could never tell him that I loved him...that he could never be mine like I was
already his...
~~~~
Eight in the morning. It was pure torture...pure joy. A paradox. It was the nervousness.
What would I say? What would I do?
I wasn't sure. For almost a year now, every morning at eight, Gohan would come over
and tutor me...
I hadn't had much human contact since the fire. Almost none at all since the betrayal.
Bulma, Vegeta, Trunks, Gohan, Goku, ChiChi, and the rest of the Zfighters were the only
ones I had ever really talked to. I hadn't gone out shopping but only a few times...it had
been too much for me to handle. The people. I could feel them staring at me...judging
me. Blind.
They were more blind to the truth than I was. They were blind to the fact that I could
take care of myself. Blind to the fact that I was still a person.
After the experience, I refused to go out with them. I didn't want pity.
The bell rang right on schedule, and I opened the door, letting Gohan in. I could feel his
ki...barely. I wasn't as strong as they were, so I couldn't feel the energy as easily as
they could, but oddly enough, I could sense high power levels...such as Gohan's, Goku's,
Trunk's and Vegeta's.
"Ohayo, Gohan-chan." I smile at him.
"Ohayo, Usa-chan." He replied. "Come on, Usa-chan! I want you to meet some of my
friends!" And before I could react, he was pulling me out the door, I almost stumbled
as he dragged me along.
I began to panic.
"UM...Gohan...stop...please..." I gasped out. "I...You know that I don't like to meet new
people!"
"Come on! You'll LOVE them!" He was laughing...and I was *really* beginning to panic.
"Gohan! Please let go of me! I..I wanna go back home!!" I hissed.
Suddenly, we both stopped. The smell of roses filled the air...and I heard a slight gasp
in front of me.
"Usagi...these are my friends-"
A familiar voice interupted him. "Hello, Koneko...it's been a long time."
"We missed you..." A softer more feminine voice whispered.
"We were worried about you..." Another whispered...
"Haruka-papa...who's that?" A little voice asked.
And I gasped. "Haruka...Michiru...Setsuna...Hotaru..." I whispered.
"You know them, Usa-chan?" Gohan asked.
My eyes narrowed, "Yes...let's go, Gohan." And I turned to leave. They were back. And
I didn't want to know...had they known all along that I was blind?
A hand caught mine. "Wait, Koneko...what's wrong?" Haruka whispered. I stopped,
but didn't answer. "Look at me..." She continued.
I turned towards her voice slightly. "I can't, Haruka." I whispered.
I couldn't see her...but I knew what she was doing long before she removed the
sunglasses I had long ago begun to wear...and I knew she was staring into my sightless
eyes.
"What happened to you, Koneko." She whispered, her voice broken.
I almost cried right then...they hadn't known. The Outers hadn't known.
"I-I'm blind, Haruka."
~~~~
~~~~
Well...REVIEW! smiles innocently...k? ja ne!
Email me!!!
psyche_lakeshore@yahoo.com
Thanx!
~~Psyche~~