Hannibal: The truth behind everything.
by weirdDAR
From the writer that brought you 'Super Midget' and 'Micheal Myers has a yard sale', comes....Hannibal: the truth behind everything. Enjoy.
Well, as you probably know, Anthony Hopkins, or anyone in their right mind won't even think about staring in this movie, so here is the new cast!
Hannibal.....Tim Allen
(He stooped this low after he realized what he had done with "Santa Claus2"
Young Hannibal....the 'dude you're getting a dell' guy. (Thank god for bad casting, huh?)
Playboy bunny....boy george....(?)
Psycho man....Jim Carrey
Narrarator: Hello. Welcome to the truth behind everything. Of course, we all know what we think is true about Hannibal. But do we know the true story? Well, do you? ANSWER ME!!!!!
*Hannibal is sitting on the floor of his prison*
Hannibal: (screaming to the guard, that is standing down the hall) WHY CAN'T YOU JUST FIX MY CHAIR SO I CAN SIT DOWN LIKE A NORMAL PERSON??? PLEASE??? FIX MY CHAIR, PLEASE! I WON'T EAT YOUR CHILDREN IF YOU FIX MY CHAIR....*waits*...FINE! I'M GOING TO EAT YOUR CHILDREN.
*pyscho man, that is in the cell next the Hannibal banging on the wall.*
Pyscho man: HEY! keep it down in there, people are trying to read!
*pyscho man continues reading 'A tale of two cities'.*
Narrarator: Pyscho man is also known as Norman Bates, in case you didn't know.
Pyscho man: Ohhh, I hope the ending is as good as the critics made it out to be.
*back to Hannibal*
(a second guard walks up to Hannibal's cell glass wall)
2nd guard: Hannibal, a young woman from the playboy mansion insisted on seeing you. Is that alright?
Hannibal: (smiling) Hell yes!
(A playboy bunny walks in)
bunny: Hello, Mr. Lector.
Hannibal: Hello, ms. centerfold August 2002.
bunny: A fan?
Hannibal: I'm locked up, what do you expect?
bunny: Can I ask you a favor?
Hannibal: sure, my darling.
bunny: Why did you start eating people?
Hannibal: Well, sure enough, people thought it was because of some survival method. But nope...I lied. The real reason is...well, it all started one night...
*Hannibal does the "wayne and garth" flashback method. You know what I'm talking about...*
*Young Hannbal is shown sweeping the floor of a McDonalds...he is wearing their uniforms.*
Manager: Hannible! Clean that blood up a little faster... Jeez, can you believe HE just came in here and started shooting people? The nerve of Dennis Rodman.
Bunny:*interupting* Was Dennis even around at this time? you were only what? 17 years old?
Hannibal: It's my story...not yours.
*back to the flashback*
Manager: Look, Hannibal, I'll clean this up. You need to just tell people that this story will be continued later this week...it's late, and weirdDAR is too tired to write anymore.
*the manager walks in the back*
(Hannibal looks around, no one is there. So he gets on the ground and begins to eat the dead bodies.)
Narrarator: Why the police haven't taken the bodies yet...I don't know.
*the manager walks back in*
Manager: What the hell are you doing, Hannibal?
Hannibal: I wanted to taste the diffrence between our burgers and people.
Manager: And...?
Hannibal: No diffrence, really. *continues eatting*
TO BE CONTINUED....
In the next chapter: We'll discover the secert of what led Hannibal to fall in love with Clarice...it's not what you would think either. I'll only write a second chapter if I get reviews...so start writing!...please.
by weirdDAR
From the writer that brought you 'Super Midget' and 'Micheal Myers has a yard sale', comes....Hannibal: the truth behind everything. Enjoy.
Well, as you probably know, Anthony Hopkins, or anyone in their right mind won't even think about staring in this movie, so here is the new cast!
Hannibal.....Tim Allen
(He stooped this low after he realized what he had done with "Santa Claus2"
Young Hannibal....the 'dude you're getting a dell' guy. (Thank god for bad casting, huh?)
Playboy bunny....boy george....(?)
Psycho man....Jim Carrey
Narrarator: Hello. Welcome to the truth behind everything. Of course, we all know what we think is true about Hannibal. But do we know the true story? Well, do you? ANSWER ME!!!!!
*Hannibal is sitting on the floor of his prison*
Hannibal: (screaming to the guard, that is standing down the hall) WHY CAN'T YOU JUST FIX MY CHAIR SO I CAN SIT DOWN LIKE A NORMAL PERSON??? PLEASE??? FIX MY CHAIR, PLEASE! I WON'T EAT YOUR CHILDREN IF YOU FIX MY CHAIR....*waits*...FINE! I'M GOING TO EAT YOUR CHILDREN.
*pyscho man, that is in the cell next the Hannibal banging on the wall.*
Pyscho man: HEY! keep it down in there, people are trying to read!
*pyscho man continues reading 'A tale of two cities'.*
Narrarator: Pyscho man is also known as Norman Bates, in case you didn't know.
Pyscho man: Ohhh, I hope the ending is as good as the critics made it out to be.
*back to Hannibal*
(a second guard walks up to Hannibal's cell glass wall)
2nd guard: Hannibal, a young woman from the playboy mansion insisted on seeing you. Is that alright?
Hannibal: (smiling) Hell yes!
(A playboy bunny walks in)
bunny: Hello, Mr. Lector.
Hannibal: Hello, ms. centerfold August 2002.
bunny: A fan?
Hannibal: I'm locked up, what do you expect?
bunny: Can I ask you a favor?
Hannibal: sure, my darling.
bunny: Why did you start eating people?
Hannibal: Well, sure enough, people thought it was because of some survival method. But nope...I lied. The real reason is...well, it all started one night...
*Hannibal does the "wayne and garth" flashback method. You know what I'm talking about...*
*Young Hannbal is shown sweeping the floor of a McDonalds...he is wearing their uniforms.*
Manager: Hannible! Clean that blood up a little faster... Jeez, can you believe HE just came in here and started shooting people? The nerve of Dennis Rodman.
Bunny:*interupting* Was Dennis even around at this time? you were only what? 17 years old?
Hannibal: It's my story...not yours.
*back to the flashback*
Manager: Look, Hannibal, I'll clean this up. You need to just tell people that this story will be continued later this week...it's late, and weirdDAR is too tired to write anymore.
*the manager walks in the back*
(Hannibal looks around, no one is there. So he gets on the ground and begins to eat the dead bodies.)
Narrarator: Why the police haven't taken the bodies yet...I don't know.
*the manager walks back in*
Manager: What the hell are you doing, Hannibal?
Hannibal: I wanted to taste the diffrence between our burgers and people.
Manager: And...?
Hannibal: No diffrence, really. *continues eatting*
TO BE CONTINUED....
In the next chapter: We'll discover the secert of what led Hannibal to fall in love with Clarice...it's not what you would think either. I'll only write a second chapter if I get reviews...so start writing!...please.