Chapter 3 - Fishing.
Bill lead the two people down the main corridor of his house. It was a corridor dimly lit with a sense of gloom about it as it was very dimly lit by large fireflies attached to the wall which were on opposite sides every few meters or so on the dark green walls. Alice had been here before to fight the Duchess (and won!) and the fireflies were still here, she was not quite sure if they were an actual decoration or if they were real animals. Servants for a purpose were common in both her world and Wonderland.
As they walked towards the main room, Alice seemed to notice that Bills lizard skin was changing colour into a deep shade of green, she could only assume he was trying to blend in with his surroundings instinctually or he was just more relaxed in his own home. At last they entered the living room.
It was almost the same as Alice's first visit except most of the pepper pots had been removed and no baby clothes were anywhere to be seen. They all sat around the main table in the centre of the room which was its smaller size. The room could widen to a great size in a matter if seconds if it needed to "Great for parties" Alice thought to herself. Bill picked up an assortments of plates and containers and placed them in front of their respective drinkers. Alice was presented with a teacup and teapot, Bill himself had a whisky vial and a small beaker and the Mock turtle had a glass of water. He didn't like it, but Bill didn't know what he liked as he cried so much. Alice poured some of the tea into the cup and sipped it daintily whereas bill downed his Whisky shot after shot.
"So," Bill began, his voice with a hint of a cockney accent. "Mockers tells me your wondering about the bandersnatch, my love?"
"Yes I am," she replied "I have heard of them several times but I've never actually seen one."
"I'm not surprised, they're very hard to catch you know." replied Bill.
"Humpty Dumpty told me this when I was in wonderland many years ago, but I didn't see one then either. Do you know anything else?"
Bill scratched his leather like skin on his head in deep thought until a recollection ran into his lizard brain.
"I know about Banderscotch if that helps?"
Alice sighed, slightly defeated. She remembered a long time ago of her father drinking with friends in the sitting room and getting rather tipsy from his efforts.
"Is Banderscotch the only thing people think of when the word "Bandersnatch" is mentioned?!" she said angrily.
"Probably," answered Bill "It's one of the favourite drinks ere."
"I think it's too warm!" piped up the Mock Turtle.
"I think it's a load o bloody rubbish!" snapped Bill. "It won't replace Brandy in my books, I'll tell ya!"
Alice regained her composure by sipping her tea once again. She caught herself wringing her hands in frustration (all as well, she was trying to keep her temper!). She remembered Turtles' words from earlier.
"Turtle said that some snarks from the ocean might know something about them and they live out to sea somewhere?"
"Maybe," gestured Bill in thought. "But it's no good trying to get there. By the time you got halfway there, you'd have to come back!"
"I certainly couldn't swim out to sea that far!" said the Turtle, slightly worried as if this was what they were going to ask him to do. "I'd be too tired. And there are huge fish out there bigger than the Queen of hearts!"
Alice shuddered slightly. The Queen of Hearts in her true form was at least a hundred feet high and not very pleasant to look at. If there were Snarks in the ocean worse than her, one wouldn't venture too far out to sea for very long.
"Well maybe gryffon could fly me over there?" Alice sounded optimistic.
"Don't be stupid!" said bill, much to her offence. "He'd be exhausted before he got a third of the way!"
"Sounds like the bandersnatch don't want to be found!"
"I'm not surprised given the taste of that banderscotch rubbish!" Bill said, slightly smiling.
"Well I'm going to see those large fish now and see if I can get some answers!" exclaimed Alice.
She drank the last of her tea, stood up and walked out of the room gesturing to her tea-mates who were busy finishing their drinks off. The Mock turtle got up and followed her leaving his water completely untouched and bill shrugged his shoulders, downed the last of his brandy and headed after them up the corridor towards the door.
Outside was it's usual murky self with the mist of the swamps and lakes hovering gently over the surface of the lake, masking the movements of any fish (or other animals) that lie beneath the surface (therein lied the danger!) After ten minutes of intense, eye straining, staring into the lake/pond for any kind of activity, Alice looked at Turtle in impatient expectancy.
"Well?" she said firmly.
"There in here somewhere I promise, I'll have a look for you!" he replied and dived into the pool.
A trail of bubbles appeared on the surface of the water and headed towards the centre rather slowly. Both Alice and Bill kept their eyes fixed on the bubbles knowing that somewhere beneath them was a Mock turtle looking for someone to talk to. The bubbles circled around the middle of the pond for sometime and Alice began to think he must come for air soon or he would drown, albeit slowly being a reptile. She was just about to give up hope when suddenly the stream of bubbles in the centre of the lake stopped abruptly.
Alice looked at Bill!
Bill looked at Alice!
They both looked out into the lake again and saw a large bubble forming on the surface on the water. It suddenly burst into the air and popped and a hideous (but cowardly scream) burst out of the bubble as many more of them furiously appeared on the surface. Seconds later, The Mock Turtle leapt out of the centre of the lake flying at least 20 miniature feet in the air, and landed on the far bank screaming and crying. He landed perfectly and began to run as fast as his feet and flippers would carry him back towards Alice's statue. He was running so fast that he ran up the waterfall as if the ground took a sudden angle upwards and disappeared in to the distance screaming in total terror!
"I think he's found summet, Don't you?" said Bill, calmly but open mouthed.
Alice couldn't speak. She was backing away from the lake slowly almost as wide mouthed as bill in total surprise. Turtle was a coward all right but she'd never seen him act like that before! Something really huge must be in there somewhere! She reached for the vorpal blade and threw it into the lake in the direction of the turtles screaming bubble, not knowing if she'd hit anything but her mind was still recovering from the shock.
Another large bubble rose from the surface, popped, and a husky, deep voice spoke very loudly.
"OW!" it said. Bill jumped at least a foot in the air.
"Well, we know it's in there!" said Bill in alarm "But it's not gonna talk to us after you chucked ya knife at it!"
Alice thought quickly
"Maybe if we apologise by giving it something to eat?" said Alice looking hopeful, and bill at the same time.
"Oh no you don't!" said bill defiantly. "I'm not going in there! And no amount o brandy's gonna change my mind about that!"
His cockney accent was grating on Alice, especially when he was angry but she wasn't listening. She felt the knife reappear in the palm of her hand and in one swift stroke sliced bills tail off! He was more shocked than hurt as the picked up the ail and placed it half in the water and half on the shore.
"What did you that for? What did I ever do to you!" he yelled but Alice again, wasn't listening.
She had begun to walk back towards his house and stopped in the doorway, apparently waiting for something.
""I'd recommend you get away from the shoreline Bill and you'll grow another tail!" Alice yelled from the house.
Bill stood straight in defiance and turned his back towards her.
Just in time to see an enormous snark burst onto the shoreline, fall flat in front of him and gobble his tail up, it's lifeless eyes glaring him in the face as its teeth tore through the meat of the tail.
Bill acted immediately but not unexpectedly.
He screamed as loud as his vocal chords would allow and darted towards his house faster than a white rabbit and leapt through the window. His head slightly re-appeared trembling as he peered over the window-frame at the large fish, eating his tail.
Alice nervously emerged from behind the front porch of Bills house and approached the giant snark cautiously (with knife at the ready behind her back just in case!) and for now he hadn't seen her.
She curtseyed in front of the giant fish and spoke in a somewhat demanding voice.
"Hello. I was wondering if you could help us?"
The fish ignored her.
"A change of attention is needed" thought Alice and pulled out the knife and took a defensive posture.
The giant fish looked up at the knife, it's black eyes wide open revealing large pools of emptiness as if it were death itself.
Suddenly and without warning, the fish opened its mouth and a long, slippery tongue darted across the shore towards Alice. She ducked and rolled to the left as the tongue whipped near her head and cracked into the ground, tearing up a nearby bush. Alice had rolled next to a nearby rock in preparation for it's next swish. The tongue cracked near to her arm (obviously trying to disarm her) but Alice was to agile for it and drove the knife through the tongue and imbedding it into the rock.
The fish let out a screeching cry of pain as it was now stuck to the ground via it's tongue and completely unable to re-enter the water. It crashed about trying to shake it's tongue loose from under the blade which Alice firmly held in place much to the fish's discomfort until she began to speak.
"I'll release you if you promise not to do that again!" Alice ordered in her sweet but stern voice.
The fish bounced once on the ground in pain and Alice assumed this to be a fishy version of "yes" so she sharply pulled out the knife and it's tongue snapped back into the fish's mouth like a piece of tightly strung elastic. It began to speak as if just returning from the dentists with a numb mouth.
"All right then, What do you want of me?" he asked in a whispery voice.
"That's better!" said Alice and sat down on the shore, fingers tightly clenched around her knife.
Bill in the meanwhile let out a pathetic sigh and a dull thud was heard as he fainted!
Bill lead the two people down the main corridor of his house. It was a corridor dimly lit with a sense of gloom about it as it was very dimly lit by large fireflies attached to the wall which were on opposite sides every few meters or so on the dark green walls. Alice had been here before to fight the Duchess (and won!) and the fireflies were still here, she was not quite sure if they were an actual decoration or if they were real animals. Servants for a purpose were common in both her world and Wonderland.
As they walked towards the main room, Alice seemed to notice that Bills lizard skin was changing colour into a deep shade of green, she could only assume he was trying to blend in with his surroundings instinctually or he was just more relaxed in his own home. At last they entered the living room.
It was almost the same as Alice's first visit except most of the pepper pots had been removed and no baby clothes were anywhere to be seen. They all sat around the main table in the centre of the room which was its smaller size. The room could widen to a great size in a matter if seconds if it needed to "Great for parties" Alice thought to herself. Bill picked up an assortments of plates and containers and placed them in front of their respective drinkers. Alice was presented with a teacup and teapot, Bill himself had a whisky vial and a small beaker and the Mock turtle had a glass of water. He didn't like it, but Bill didn't know what he liked as he cried so much. Alice poured some of the tea into the cup and sipped it daintily whereas bill downed his Whisky shot after shot.
"So," Bill began, his voice with a hint of a cockney accent. "Mockers tells me your wondering about the bandersnatch, my love?"
"Yes I am," she replied "I have heard of them several times but I've never actually seen one."
"I'm not surprised, they're very hard to catch you know." replied Bill.
"Humpty Dumpty told me this when I was in wonderland many years ago, but I didn't see one then either. Do you know anything else?"
Bill scratched his leather like skin on his head in deep thought until a recollection ran into his lizard brain.
"I know about Banderscotch if that helps?"
Alice sighed, slightly defeated. She remembered a long time ago of her father drinking with friends in the sitting room and getting rather tipsy from his efforts.
"Is Banderscotch the only thing people think of when the word "Bandersnatch" is mentioned?!" she said angrily.
"Probably," answered Bill "It's one of the favourite drinks ere."
"I think it's too warm!" piped up the Mock Turtle.
"I think it's a load o bloody rubbish!" snapped Bill. "It won't replace Brandy in my books, I'll tell ya!"
Alice regained her composure by sipping her tea once again. She caught herself wringing her hands in frustration (all as well, she was trying to keep her temper!). She remembered Turtles' words from earlier.
"Turtle said that some snarks from the ocean might know something about them and they live out to sea somewhere?"
"Maybe," gestured Bill in thought. "But it's no good trying to get there. By the time you got halfway there, you'd have to come back!"
"I certainly couldn't swim out to sea that far!" said the Turtle, slightly worried as if this was what they were going to ask him to do. "I'd be too tired. And there are huge fish out there bigger than the Queen of hearts!"
Alice shuddered slightly. The Queen of Hearts in her true form was at least a hundred feet high and not very pleasant to look at. If there were Snarks in the ocean worse than her, one wouldn't venture too far out to sea for very long.
"Well maybe gryffon could fly me over there?" Alice sounded optimistic.
"Don't be stupid!" said bill, much to her offence. "He'd be exhausted before he got a third of the way!"
"Sounds like the bandersnatch don't want to be found!"
"I'm not surprised given the taste of that banderscotch rubbish!" Bill said, slightly smiling.
"Well I'm going to see those large fish now and see if I can get some answers!" exclaimed Alice.
She drank the last of her tea, stood up and walked out of the room gesturing to her tea-mates who were busy finishing their drinks off. The Mock turtle got up and followed her leaving his water completely untouched and bill shrugged his shoulders, downed the last of his brandy and headed after them up the corridor towards the door.
Outside was it's usual murky self with the mist of the swamps and lakes hovering gently over the surface of the lake, masking the movements of any fish (or other animals) that lie beneath the surface (therein lied the danger!) After ten minutes of intense, eye straining, staring into the lake/pond for any kind of activity, Alice looked at Turtle in impatient expectancy.
"Well?" she said firmly.
"There in here somewhere I promise, I'll have a look for you!" he replied and dived into the pool.
A trail of bubbles appeared on the surface of the water and headed towards the centre rather slowly. Both Alice and Bill kept their eyes fixed on the bubbles knowing that somewhere beneath them was a Mock turtle looking for someone to talk to. The bubbles circled around the middle of the pond for sometime and Alice began to think he must come for air soon or he would drown, albeit slowly being a reptile. She was just about to give up hope when suddenly the stream of bubbles in the centre of the lake stopped abruptly.
Alice looked at Bill!
Bill looked at Alice!
They both looked out into the lake again and saw a large bubble forming on the surface on the water. It suddenly burst into the air and popped and a hideous (but cowardly scream) burst out of the bubble as many more of them furiously appeared on the surface. Seconds later, The Mock Turtle leapt out of the centre of the lake flying at least 20 miniature feet in the air, and landed on the far bank screaming and crying. He landed perfectly and began to run as fast as his feet and flippers would carry him back towards Alice's statue. He was running so fast that he ran up the waterfall as if the ground took a sudden angle upwards and disappeared in to the distance screaming in total terror!
"I think he's found summet, Don't you?" said Bill, calmly but open mouthed.
Alice couldn't speak. She was backing away from the lake slowly almost as wide mouthed as bill in total surprise. Turtle was a coward all right but she'd never seen him act like that before! Something really huge must be in there somewhere! She reached for the vorpal blade and threw it into the lake in the direction of the turtles screaming bubble, not knowing if she'd hit anything but her mind was still recovering from the shock.
Another large bubble rose from the surface, popped, and a husky, deep voice spoke very loudly.
"OW!" it said. Bill jumped at least a foot in the air.
"Well, we know it's in there!" said Bill in alarm "But it's not gonna talk to us after you chucked ya knife at it!"
Alice thought quickly
"Maybe if we apologise by giving it something to eat?" said Alice looking hopeful, and bill at the same time.
"Oh no you don't!" said bill defiantly. "I'm not going in there! And no amount o brandy's gonna change my mind about that!"
His cockney accent was grating on Alice, especially when he was angry but she wasn't listening. She felt the knife reappear in the palm of her hand and in one swift stroke sliced bills tail off! He was more shocked than hurt as the picked up the ail and placed it half in the water and half on the shore.
"What did you that for? What did I ever do to you!" he yelled but Alice again, wasn't listening.
She had begun to walk back towards his house and stopped in the doorway, apparently waiting for something.
""I'd recommend you get away from the shoreline Bill and you'll grow another tail!" Alice yelled from the house.
Bill stood straight in defiance and turned his back towards her.
Just in time to see an enormous snark burst onto the shoreline, fall flat in front of him and gobble his tail up, it's lifeless eyes glaring him in the face as its teeth tore through the meat of the tail.
Bill acted immediately but not unexpectedly.
He screamed as loud as his vocal chords would allow and darted towards his house faster than a white rabbit and leapt through the window. His head slightly re-appeared trembling as he peered over the window-frame at the large fish, eating his tail.
Alice nervously emerged from behind the front porch of Bills house and approached the giant snark cautiously (with knife at the ready behind her back just in case!) and for now he hadn't seen her.
She curtseyed in front of the giant fish and spoke in a somewhat demanding voice.
"Hello. I was wondering if you could help us?"
The fish ignored her.
"A change of attention is needed" thought Alice and pulled out the knife and took a defensive posture.
The giant fish looked up at the knife, it's black eyes wide open revealing large pools of emptiness as if it were death itself.
Suddenly and without warning, the fish opened its mouth and a long, slippery tongue darted across the shore towards Alice. She ducked and rolled to the left as the tongue whipped near her head and cracked into the ground, tearing up a nearby bush. Alice had rolled next to a nearby rock in preparation for it's next swish. The tongue cracked near to her arm (obviously trying to disarm her) but Alice was to agile for it and drove the knife through the tongue and imbedding it into the rock.
The fish let out a screeching cry of pain as it was now stuck to the ground via it's tongue and completely unable to re-enter the water. It crashed about trying to shake it's tongue loose from under the blade which Alice firmly held in place much to the fish's discomfort until she began to speak.
"I'll release you if you promise not to do that again!" Alice ordered in her sweet but stern voice.
The fish bounced once on the ground in pain and Alice assumed this to be a fishy version of "yes" so she sharply pulled out the knife and it's tongue snapped back into the fish's mouth like a piece of tightly strung elastic. It began to speak as if just returning from the dentists with a numb mouth.
"All right then, What do you want of me?" he asked in a whispery voice.
"That's better!" said Alice and sat down on the shore, fingers tightly clenched around her knife.
Bill in the meanwhile let out a pathetic sigh and a dull thud was heard as he fainted!