Tomb Raider: The Scantily Clad Chronicles
Chapter 3: A Rival Emerges!
[After rescuing Lara from the Monkey Bars, Butler and Jeeves make her strong coffee]
Butler: Miss Croft forgive me I never meant to….
Lara: Oh you think you can fool me, Arnold…
Butler: [Looking pissed off] Pimms.
Lara: Right. But I know this was a test of my endurance. To see what I could really do you sly devil!
Butler: Umm…of course.
Lara: While I was up there I remember a book my father used to read me.
[Dramatic music begins to play] It told of the dagger and it's powers and it gave clues of where to find it. Unfortunately he sold it in a car boot sale. If only I could find the owner!
Butler: You didn't think to mention it earlier?
Lara: The opportunity never came up…
[Butler mumbles something that sounds remarkably like 'Daft cow']
Jeeves: Do you mean the Dagger of the Monks of Scantily Cladness? [Lara nods. Jeeves shouts in a shocked fashion] It belongs to my employer Baron Von Mimblewimble!
Lara: Hmmm.
Jeeves: Aren't you in the least bit frightened?
Lara: Nah!
Jeeves: But he sounds so evil and mysterious. How will you ever defeat him?
Lara: I'm planning to shoot him in the head.
Jeeves: Oh...right.
Lara: Quick to the Croft Mobile!
Butler: Are you talking about the Skoda?
Lara: [Still Confident] Yes…yes I am!
[We cut to a darkened room lit only by a fireplace. A man resembling Woody Allen stands in a Smoking Jacket drinking a glass of brandy watching a computer screen. Lara is seen standing there.]
Baron: Oh you think you can beat me Miss Croft you are sorely mistaken., mwhaha, Mwhaha, MWHAHA!
[We hear a bang from above]
Baron's Mother: Keep it down!
Baron: Sorry Momma!
Chapter 3: A Rival Emerges!
[After rescuing Lara from the Monkey Bars, Butler and Jeeves make her strong coffee]
Butler: Miss Croft forgive me I never meant to….
Lara: Oh you think you can fool me, Arnold…
Butler: [Looking pissed off] Pimms.
Lara: Right. But I know this was a test of my endurance. To see what I could really do you sly devil!
Butler: Umm…of course.
Lara: While I was up there I remember a book my father used to read me.
[Dramatic music begins to play] It told of the dagger and it's powers and it gave clues of where to find it. Unfortunately he sold it in a car boot sale. If only I could find the owner!
Butler: You didn't think to mention it earlier?
Lara: The opportunity never came up…
[Butler mumbles something that sounds remarkably like 'Daft cow']
Jeeves: Do you mean the Dagger of the Monks of Scantily Cladness? [Lara nods. Jeeves shouts in a shocked fashion] It belongs to my employer Baron Von Mimblewimble!
Lara: Hmmm.
Jeeves: Aren't you in the least bit frightened?
Lara: Nah!
Jeeves: But he sounds so evil and mysterious. How will you ever defeat him?
Lara: I'm planning to shoot him in the head.
Jeeves: Oh...right.
Lara: Quick to the Croft Mobile!
Butler: Are you talking about the Skoda?
Lara: [Still Confident] Yes…yes I am!
[We cut to a darkened room lit only by a fireplace. A man resembling Woody Allen stands in a Smoking Jacket drinking a glass of brandy watching a computer screen. Lara is seen standing there.]
Baron: Oh you think you can beat me Miss Croft you are sorely mistaken., mwhaha, Mwhaha, MWHAHA!
[We hear a bang from above]
Baron's Mother: Keep it down!
Baron: Sorry Momma!