Standard Disclaimers: not mine, no money. Has one teeny swear word.
Spoilers for "Sacrifice," of course.
See? I can be nice to Jake! Ha! Bet you all thought I couldn't, didn't you??
Vampires in New York
By Kameka
Jake McCartey shook his head and groaned as he began to investigate the crime scene on his way to talk to the guy who found the body. Great. Just great. Sara Pezzini, his training officer and partner at the NYPD, already thought he was a complete rookie. Now she was going to think he was an imbecilic one at that. He hadn't even been trying to allude to the blood sucking undead that made Bram Stoker, Anne Rice, and Joss Whedon famous.
Why did these things happen to him? Pez loved crossword puzzles. How many semi-filled books of them had he seen at her loft apartment? He'd lost count at twenty. Figuring it was a way to fit in, not to mention gain some respect in her eyes, he'd begin to pore over trivia books. Most of his free time was spent that way; he'd probably read more in the past month than his whole life!
Finally, after days of waiting, it came. The absolute perfect opportunity to show off his newfound knowledge. He could be witty and smart. Not be seen as a rookie that needed his hand held. Gain Pez's respect. He might even make some headway on getting her to see him as an adult. As a guy. A potential date or, better yet, a potential boyfriend. Or so he thought.
Think its vampires, Pez?
What is it about me that makes people assume the worst? By that, I mean assume that I'm stupid. Is it the hair? Blondes' being dumb is a myth. A stereotype. People should know better than to stereotype other people. Cops should definitely know better. It hasn't stopped anyone. At least, not when it comes to me.
Of course I didn't explain what I meant. I'm not totally sure why. Part of it's because she should already know. She should've understood the joke. She never needed Danny's explained; why should she need mine? Another part, one of the bigger ones if I'm honest with myself, is Pez herself. She's the absolute queen of sarcasm and smart-ass remarks.
Pez, I wasn't talking about the undead bloodsuckers. You know, vampires… A malignant and loathsome creature or character, a vile and cruel exactor, a parasite. A person who ruthlessly preys on others.
What'd you do, rookie, eat a dictionary for breakfast?
Yep, I can see it all now. Just what I need to start off my morning. A nice homicide, being treated like a fool, and sarcasm. Breakfast of champions.
This crime scene is actually pretty clean. Well, if you clean up the trash. There's not a lot of blood, no obvious sign of a struggle. She must've known the killer. Pez found something. A symbol drawn into the wall. Yes, into, not onto. It was scratched in with something.
No, Pez, I didn't find it. One more black mark against the rookie. Sometimes I swear I can feel her looking into my soul. It's like her green eyes are really x-rays. Sounds pretty fanciful, I know. It would explain some of the freaky things that go on in her life. In her cases. How did Danny every put up with this level of the absurd and stay sane? Is there some trick to being a partner I haven't learnt yet? Something he didn't pass on before he died? Or is it just being her partner?
I'm leaning towards the last. She's stock full of contradictions. Meet her off the job, you see a beautiful woman. A bit remote, but beautiful. Meet her on the job, you see a no-nonsense cop. She's a complete jock: running, boxing, street fighting, softball, basketball and more. That I know of. I think Danny was teaching her some martial arts moves. Then she turns into a total intellectual. She just breaks the mold.
Half the time I expect her to burst because she has so much energy. So much passion. She's so alive that she makes me feel alive just by being around her. Then she can get so quiet. I feel like touching her just to see if her skin is warm. Had she been turned into a gargoyle by some magic? I don't touch her, of course. I value both my life and my limbs too much.
That's another thing that attracts me to her. She's always so private, so controlled. She knows exactly who's around and what they're doing. That's part of what makes her a great cop. Being that private, though… It can't be healthy for her. I'm her partner. Have been for a while now. I barely now anything about her. Her parents are dead. She told me that much. In a flat, emotionless voice that still worries me. She had a druggie friend who was possibly a prostitute. Was definitely a party girl. I only know that because her obsession with finding Maria's murderer was common knowledge. Make that catching Maria's murderer. She knew whom he was and where to find him. Just needed the evidence.
That whole thing led to how I became her partner. It was while trying to pin Maria's murder on Gallo that Danny was killed. Would the captain have made her my training officer if Danny had lived? I'm really not sure.
Is it awful of me to be glad he's dead?
I liked Danny. I really did. Daniel Woo was one of the precinct's best Homicide detectives. He was well liked, great with the victims' families, and managed to keep Pez in line. A great feat, I can say from experience and failure. I get the feeling that we could've been great friends. He got along with Pez. She's no slouch when it comes to measuring people.
Does that mean I don't measure up?
The problem is that I love being Pez's partner. She's beautiful, smart, and funny. A real spitfire. I come to work to see her. That's not one of my only reasons but it is one. A professional perk. Being her partner is wonderful. Nerve-racking and annoying when she lets me stumble around without a clue. Great police officer, lousy training officer. Even if she is lousy at training me, I still like being her partner.
It feels like I'm trying to take Danny's place. Am I? I want to be her partner and friend. That's what Danny was.
Sometimes I hate myself.
The End
Bram Stoker: author of Dracula
Anne Rice: author of Interview with a Vampire, Queen of the Damned, and many others.
Joss Whedon: producer (I believe) of the TV show Buffy the Vampire Slayer starring Sarah
Michelle Gellar
Definition of a vampire is from Oxford Dictionary.