Notes: I wrote Oliver's speech in Scots just to make him more realistic (don't we all love when he says 'Bloodger'?). It's not that hard to read it, really. If Irvine Welsh could write in it and get so many of us to read his books, so there we have it. The key to understanding it is to read it either loud or inside, and when read, everything seems more comprehendable.
Disclaimer: the characters I am screwing up with are not mine. Don't sue!
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"Maybe this wasn't such a good idea, Minerva," sighed Oliver. He was ushered into the chambers that will be called his personal during his stay at Hogwarts.
"Rubbish, lad," she snarled at him.
He looked around the simple room with four-poster bed and big closet. View was on the Quidditch Pitch. Oliver went closer to view outside.
"Remember your third year when you got sick and wanted to watch the Gryffindor-Slytherin game, but I would not let you. You said how you wish Gryffindor common room had view on the Quidditch Pitch..."
"Yeah... Gryffindor won, though..." Oliver sighed happily, reminding himself of the merry days when he would plan out his glorious Quidditch future with Fred and George.
"Ach, you were always a weird sort... got it from your mother's side of Campbells. Your father may go on and on about Scottish pride of Woods, but you're a true Campbell," said Minerva.
"Well, I better be off. I'll send Severus here to give you the teaching timetable. Please unpack and don't just throw clothes around as you always do. You know, when they made a closet, they made it with a purpose," she said, tapping his shoulder.
Before she left he added: "Bye, Auntie."
Oliver, ignoring completely what Minerva said, opened his trunk and begun to take things out of it. Clothing was falling everywhere around. Pants, shirts, robes, ties, shawls, kilts, socks, cloaks, boxers, and every other clothing item was covering the furniture.
A rhythmic knock was heard from his door.
"Come in," Oliver said automatically. Profession Snape walked in, his long robes and cloak dragging after him.
"Severus... Glad tae see ya... I can call ya Severus, of coorse ... Or ya wish tae be called Professor Snape," said Oliver merrily, closing the door after his former Professor.
Snape said nothing, just grunted gloomily, and handed him his teaching timetable.
"Thanks," responded Oliver, taking it in his hands. Severus was standing there, saying nothing, as Oliver went over the timetable.
"It's not really too busy... not too much to teach..." commented Oliver as he noticed Severus scrutinising his clothes.
"You Scots still wear these skirts," muttered Severus derisively.
"We call 'em kilts in Scootlund," laughed Oliver, throwing the piece of parchment on the night table.
"The feast is starting at eight o'clock tonight. We ought to see you there on time."
That was all he said, and before he exited he added: "Don't wear the skirt."
Oliver rolled his eyes, jumping down on the bed, over his clothes, and studying his timetable for some time.
Tomorrow, he would have only two classes - with Hufflepuffs and Slytherins in their first year and Gryffindors and Slytherins in their sixth year. 'Hmm...' he thought, 'Harry Potter will be there.'
He descended to the Great Hall fifteen minutes before seven. Minerva showed him to his seat and hurried off to meet the first years.
Oliver sat down and looked around him. He noticed a familiar face abreast of him.
"See, I'm wearin' keks (translation: keks - pants)," Oliver said to Severus who sat beside him.
"Good for you," replied Severus darkly.
"Hey, we can be mates now... there is nae rivalry between us. Even thought you are the head of the Slytherin, I am nae longer in Gryffindor. I am a teacher now, too."
"Well in that case I really wish you a nice staying at Hogwarts," said Severus exposing row of sharp teeth.
Next moment the great doors opened and the students walked in. Oliver saw many familiar faces taking seats at their tables.
Sorting went smoothly but eventlessly.
"Yet another year at Hogwarts..." said the old man, Dumbledore, getting up to give his annual speech.
"As many of us know, Madam Hooch resigned from her position. We got another teacher to take her position. Mr Wood, whom many of you already know, would you please get up..."
Oliver got up and smiled, as he listened for the long applause. The entire Gryffindor table was cheering.
"That is not our only change amongst the teachers. We have the new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher this year, too..."
Many people groaned.
"...Fleur Delacoeur!"
Mainly boys cheered at her. Number of girls, who either knew Fleur from few years ago and who did not, scoffed at her prettiness.
Dumbledore said few other things, which included bunch of unimportant things.
Throughout the dinner, Oliver tried to engage Severus in conversation with clever and discourteous lines like: "Ah think I'll wear mae kilt tomorrow. Weather'll be nice, accept for the breeze... what do ye thin, Severus?" and "'At meatloaf looks like it's looking at me." Then he noticed Fleur smiling at him from the other end of the table.
After the dinner she approached him.
"'Allo," she said to him, as they were walking towards the teachers' quarters, putting her brittle hand on his broad shoulder.
"Hello," he replied.
"Nice day, today," she continued.
"Very nice..." replied Oliver. Somehow he did not enjoy her company. She was pretty, hot, all that, but somehow she seemed too shallow to him. He could probably fuck her and then call it quits.
"Would you like to come over to my room for a drink?" she asked making that thrilling smile.
"Uhm... I'd loove tae... but erm... I've got tae talk tae Professor Dumbledore," he said apologetically, making a one-second smile, and running away from her in opposite direction.
Later, he could not explain himself this decision. And he could've fucked her, it was all in her eyes. But yet, he have chosen to flee away from her.
He decided that when he is already back downstairs to seek after Dumbledore to ask him about the next week's teachers' meeting. He could have asked that Fleur, too, but he preferred the old man Dumbly, as Fred and George would call him.
Dumbledore was not in his office. Oliver made sure in that after he opened it with the password. Next he went to seek for Minerva, but she was nowhere to be found. He did not dare to look for her at her chambers because Fleur may be around there.
Then an idea came to him - he could ask Severus. Sure, he found it rather interesting to irritate the poor bat-like guy. Oliver had to admit to himself, he would love to wash Severus' hair personally.
"Come in," came a chilling voice through the rough door. Oliver opened them, stepping out of the dungeons, and into Severus' office.
"Anything bothering you?" said Severus rather awelessly upon seeing Oliver.
"Guid day Sev, I thought that you kent what time is the teachers' meeting next week?" said Oliver, sitting down opposite of Severus.
"When did you start calling me 'Sev'?" Snarled Severus in acid voice.
"Okay, don't fuss. Sir Snape, I thought you might possibly know at what time shall the teachers' meeting, next week, be held?" said Oliver, even fixing his accent to sound pure Oxford.
"Five o'clock," Severus replied stiffly, quill in his hand dangling over the blank sheet of parchment.
"Ah thought that that was better than the Claymore..."
"Is that all you wanted?"
"Pretty much..."
"So why did you come to me? Couldn't you have gone to your Aunt Minerva?" Severus sneered.
"Ah couldn't fin' her. I ran away from Miss Delacoeur... I ran away from her because she was tryin' tae rape me," answered Oliver earnestly.
"So you're not interested in girls?" Severus sneered even wider.
"Guid day, don't be sae quick tae make decisions!" Jumped Oliver, somewhat alarmed.
They stared at each other for a minute. Oliver spoke then: "Whay about you?"
"IWhat/I about me?"
"Whit side do you swing on?" asked Oliver holding one of his eyebrows up.
Severus gave a relaxed, derisive laugh. Then he snarled: "Get out of my office!"
Oliver, not knowing why, stayed there. He guessed it must be curiosity.
"Don't be sae harsh, Sev."
Severus stared at the younger man for several minutes.
"Why are you interested to know?" he smirked suddenly, getting his evil face on. Oliver felt alarmed again. He didn't know what to answer.
"I don't know, maybe I'm interested in you?"
He exited mystically, going to his chambers and getting to sleep. Just as he laid down he realised that what he just have said sounded really gay.
"Oh man..." he sighed, lying on the bed full of clothes, and falling asleep.
Disclaimer: the characters I am screwing up with are not mine. Don't sue!
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"Maybe this wasn't such a good idea, Minerva," sighed Oliver. He was ushered into the chambers that will be called his personal during his stay at Hogwarts.
"Rubbish, lad," she snarled at him.
He looked around the simple room with four-poster bed and big closet. View was on the Quidditch Pitch. Oliver went closer to view outside.
"Remember your third year when you got sick and wanted to watch the Gryffindor-Slytherin game, but I would not let you. You said how you wish Gryffindor common room had view on the Quidditch Pitch..."
"Yeah... Gryffindor won, though..." Oliver sighed happily, reminding himself of the merry days when he would plan out his glorious Quidditch future with Fred and George.
"Ach, you were always a weird sort... got it from your mother's side of Campbells. Your father may go on and on about Scottish pride of Woods, but you're a true Campbell," said Minerva.
"Well, I better be off. I'll send Severus here to give you the teaching timetable. Please unpack and don't just throw clothes around as you always do. You know, when they made a closet, they made it with a purpose," she said, tapping his shoulder.
Before she left he added: "Bye, Auntie."
Oliver, ignoring completely what Minerva said, opened his trunk and begun to take things out of it. Clothing was falling everywhere around. Pants, shirts, robes, ties, shawls, kilts, socks, cloaks, boxers, and every other clothing item was covering the furniture.
A rhythmic knock was heard from his door.
"Come in," Oliver said automatically. Profession Snape walked in, his long robes and cloak dragging after him.
"Severus... Glad tae see ya... I can call ya Severus, of coorse ... Or ya wish tae be called Professor Snape," said Oliver merrily, closing the door after his former Professor.
Snape said nothing, just grunted gloomily, and handed him his teaching timetable.
"Thanks," responded Oliver, taking it in his hands. Severus was standing there, saying nothing, as Oliver went over the timetable.
"It's not really too busy... not too much to teach..." commented Oliver as he noticed Severus scrutinising his clothes.
"You Scots still wear these skirts," muttered Severus derisively.
"We call 'em kilts in Scootlund," laughed Oliver, throwing the piece of parchment on the night table.
"The feast is starting at eight o'clock tonight. We ought to see you there on time."
That was all he said, and before he exited he added: "Don't wear the skirt."
Oliver rolled his eyes, jumping down on the bed, over his clothes, and studying his timetable for some time.
Tomorrow, he would have only two classes - with Hufflepuffs and Slytherins in their first year and Gryffindors and Slytherins in their sixth year. 'Hmm...' he thought, 'Harry Potter will be there.'
He descended to the Great Hall fifteen minutes before seven. Minerva showed him to his seat and hurried off to meet the first years.
Oliver sat down and looked around him. He noticed a familiar face abreast of him.
"See, I'm wearin' keks (translation: keks - pants)," Oliver said to Severus who sat beside him.
"Good for you," replied Severus darkly.
"Hey, we can be mates now... there is nae rivalry between us. Even thought you are the head of the Slytherin, I am nae longer in Gryffindor. I am a teacher now, too."
"Well in that case I really wish you a nice staying at Hogwarts," said Severus exposing row of sharp teeth.
Next moment the great doors opened and the students walked in. Oliver saw many familiar faces taking seats at their tables.
Sorting went smoothly but eventlessly.
"Yet another year at Hogwarts..." said the old man, Dumbledore, getting up to give his annual speech.
"As many of us know, Madam Hooch resigned from her position. We got another teacher to take her position. Mr Wood, whom many of you already know, would you please get up..."
Oliver got up and smiled, as he listened for the long applause. The entire Gryffindor table was cheering.
"That is not our only change amongst the teachers. We have the new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher this year, too..."
Many people groaned.
"...Fleur Delacoeur!"
Mainly boys cheered at her. Number of girls, who either knew Fleur from few years ago and who did not, scoffed at her prettiness.
Dumbledore said few other things, which included bunch of unimportant things.
Throughout the dinner, Oliver tried to engage Severus in conversation with clever and discourteous lines like: "Ah think I'll wear mae kilt tomorrow. Weather'll be nice, accept for the breeze... what do ye thin, Severus?" and "'At meatloaf looks like it's looking at me." Then he noticed Fleur smiling at him from the other end of the table.
After the dinner she approached him.
"'Allo," she said to him, as they were walking towards the teachers' quarters, putting her brittle hand on his broad shoulder.
"Hello," he replied.
"Nice day, today," she continued.
"Very nice..." replied Oliver. Somehow he did not enjoy her company. She was pretty, hot, all that, but somehow she seemed too shallow to him. He could probably fuck her and then call it quits.
"Would you like to come over to my room for a drink?" she asked making that thrilling smile.
"Uhm... I'd loove tae... but erm... I've got tae talk tae Professor Dumbledore," he said apologetically, making a one-second smile, and running away from her in opposite direction.
Later, he could not explain himself this decision. And he could've fucked her, it was all in her eyes. But yet, he have chosen to flee away from her.
He decided that when he is already back downstairs to seek after Dumbledore to ask him about the next week's teachers' meeting. He could have asked that Fleur, too, but he preferred the old man Dumbly, as Fred and George would call him.
Dumbledore was not in his office. Oliver made sure in that after he opened it with the password. Next he went to seek for Minerva, but she was nowhere to be found. He did not dare to look for her at her chambers because Fleur may be around there.
Then an idea came to him - he could ask Severus. Sure, he found it rather interesting to irritate the poor bat-like guy. Oliver had to admit to himself, he would love to wash Severus' hair personally.
"Come in," came a chilling voice through the rough door. Oliver opened them, stepping out of the dungeons, and into Severus' office.
"Anything bothering you?" said Severus rather awelessly upon seeing Oliver.
"Guid day Sev, I thought that you kent what time is the teachers' meeting next week?" said Oliver, sitting down opposite of Severus.
"When did you start calling me 'Sev'?" Snarled Severus in acid voice.
"Okay, don't fuss. Sir Snape, I thought you might possibly know at what time shall the teachers' meeting, next week, be held?" said Oliver, even fixing his accent to sound pure Oxford.
"Five o'clock," Severus replied stiffly, quill in his hand dangling over the blank sheet of parchment.
"Ah thought that that was better than the Claymore..."
"Is that all you wanted?"
"Pretty much..."
"So why did you come to me? Couldn't you have gone to your Aunt Minerva?" Severus sneered.
"Ah couldn't fin' her. I ran away from Miss Delacoeur... I ran away from her because she was tryin' tae rape me," answered Oliver earnestly.
"So you're not interested in girls?" Severus sneered even wider.
"Guid day, don't be sae quick tae make decisions!" Jumped Oliver, somewhat alarmed.
They stared at each other for a minute. Oliver spoke then: "Whay about you?"
"IWhat/I about me?"
"Whit side do you swing on?" asked Oliver holding one of his eyebrows up.
Severus gave a relaxed, derisive laugh. Then he snarled: "Get out of my office!"
Oliver, not knowing why, stayed there. He guessed it must be curiosity.
"Don't be sae harsh, Sev."
Severus stared at the younger man for several minutes.
"Why are you interested to know?" he smirked suddenly, getting his evil face on. Oliver felt alarmed again. He didn't know what to answer.
"I don't know, maybe I'm interested in you?"
He exited mystically, going to his chambers and getting to sleep. Just as he laid down he realised that what he just have said sounded really gay.
"Oh man..." he sighed, lying on the bed full of clothes, and falling asleep.