The Final Day
Inu-Yasha's Day
(If you think that we're actually going to change our hearts and write Kagome's chapter THIS TIME then you are HORRIBLY mistaken and need to reconsider your whole thinking process.)
Someone, I don't know when and I don't know how but someone, with a very loud horn who likes to wake people up early every day is going to die. I don't know how much more of this I can take. This whole camp experience is not growing on me and I have half a mind to just go up to Kagome and tell her that I need to go home right away. I don't care how sick she is or how much she wants to stay but I can't stand another day of this!
I lugged myself out of bed only to be greeted by a group fully dressed eight-year-old human females. It wasn't everyone but it was MOST of them.
"What are you so enthusiastic about?" I asked.
"Today is the last day of camp!" Explained Sarah. "And since you are the best counselor in the world, we want to make it extra special for you!"
They all cheered and hugged me and did all kinds of things. The only thing I really heard, however was 'today is the last day of camp'. I couldn't be more thrilled. I haven't been this excited since I learned how to use the Kaze no Kizu at will! NO! I'm MORE excited now! The only thing that could make me happier is learning that Naraku is dead!
"Let's go to our LAST breakfast!" said Julia. I guess I couldn't help but be ecstatic but I didn't want to ruin my status so I tried to act the way I usually do. We walked down to the main building area that we usually eat in and everything was all decorated fancily and Mr. Shawn was wearing a suit. I seriously need to smite this guy.
Eventually, the groups filed in and Mr. Shawn stood up on some little podium that he had dragged in.
"We'll just wait until all the groups get here before we start." Explained Mr. Shawn into his little microphone thingy.
"I want to eat NOW!!" whined Sarah even though I knew she didn't really care. The only groups I noticed that were missing were Miroku's and Sango's. There could have been others missing as well but I don't know the counselors well enough to pick them from a crowd let alone notice that they aren't here.
Sango's group came in a few minutes later and she apologized for being late. Mr. Shawn said a few things to her and she went to sit down. Now all we had to do was wait for Miroku. This pissed me off because Miroku was keeping me from eating! I hope he gets severely punished for his tardiness! If he isn't, then I'll punish him myself!
So we waited…
And waited…
And waited for what seemed like hours. All the girls in my group complained and whined and did all other kinds of annoying things that little girls do when they either want something or crave attention.
"Perhaps we'll start without the Bunnies…" said Mr. Shawn as he cleared his throat. "There's only one camper and one counselor so two people won't make THAT much of a difference."
Then Mr. Shawn did some stupid hand gesture and a guy in the back ran out the door. I decided not to plague myself too much with the significance of this. Then he started in the longest, most boring speech of sappiness in the entire world. I didn't listen to word of it. Oh well. I'm sure it wasn't important anyway. Then Mr. Shawn passed out some schedules that were all decorated nicely and all that kind of stuff that meant SOMEONE obviously spent WAY too much time on making schedules that would be crumbled up and thrown away at the end of the day.
I thought I would nearly burst into an uncontrollable rage when I saw what we had first for the day. SINGING! What the HELL?!
But the girls were excited and I regretted the fact that I had yelled 'SINGING?!' in my blind rage because now I couldn't fool them and tell them that we actually had something else that wasn't QUITE as retarded as singing next on our schedule.
So I cleared my throat. "Did I say singing?" I said. "It must have just sounded like singing just because I had some food in my mouth at the time. I actually said tubing."
The girls stared at me for a minute with their mouths hanging open. "Oh." Said Julia. "Tubing's better anyway."
"YEAH!!!" cheered all the girls as they jumped up and started dancing around like fools. I told them to sit down and shut up or I'd make them go to singing so they all sat down and waited for the bell to ring. When it did ring, I took them all to tubing before Mr. Shawn could come along and tell us to go to singing since he probably memorized all of the schedules.
On the way, I spotted Miroku and Russell boarding a boat. I decided to go over there and give him a piece of my mind. "Hey, Miroku, where were you during breakfast?!" I demanded.
He only looked up vaguely in my general direction and didn't really answer.
"HELLO?!" I yelled. "I'm TALKING to you!!"
"Yeah!!" said Sarah as she jumped forward. "Mr. I is talking to you!!"
"Sarah, I don't need an echo." I told her.
"Sarah, I don't need an echo." Sarah repeated for the soul purpose of getting on my nerves but it didn't work since I didn't really care all that much in the first place.
"Hi Mr. I, you're my swimming counselor!!!" Russell yelled as he waved both his arms. "Remember me?!"
I decided to ignore him and demand and answer from Miroku but he only waved his hand at me as if telling me to run along and I took that as an offensive gesture but before I could do anything about it, the boat suddenly sped off so that meant that I would also have to smite the counselor who was driving the boat since he/she/it had suddenly sped off while I was speaking.
We were just about to continue on our way to tubing when I suddenly noticed Mr. Darrin walk right by us so I reached out and grabbed his arm and pulled him back over.
"Excuse you!" said Mr. Darrin incredibly rudely.
"Where do you think you're going?" I demanded.
"Canoeing." He answered.
"But you're the tubing counselor." I reminded him.
"I do water skiing too."
"What business do you have over at canoeing when you belong over at tubing and water skiing?"
"And since when did I have to report to you where I'm going at all times?"
"Since NOW."
"Why do you want to know?"
"Because my group has tubing right now and if you're canoeing, who will drive the boat for us?"
"It says on my schedule that I have a free period."
Man that Mr. Darrin thought he was one smart guy. Well, he's not. I'm much smarter than he is. "Mr. Shawn told me that your schedule is wrong."
"Why wouldn't Mr. Shawn just come and tell ME that my schedule is wrong?"
"Because he likes me more! Now drive the boat for us!"
"Make me!"
"I don't want to have to! I'd much rather keep a good reputation and keep on my role of not killing anyone!"
"Like you've killed anyone."
"I've killed more people than times you've gotten in your little boat and driven around that lake."
"Well it's nice to know that you're a camp counselor."
…
I hate Mr. Darrin.
"They were mostly demons." I corrected myself. "But I HAVE killed a lot of humans too."
"I don't believe you as far as I can throw you."
What the hell was that supposed to mean? "I can throw you further."
"I never said that…" started Mr. Darrin but then he let out a loud groan and started attempting to wrench his arm from my grip but I can tell you now that he wasn't going succeed. "Let go of me before I'm forced to get physical!!"
"You wish you could get physical because you know I'd win."
"No, I don't want to have to especially in front of pure little girls!"
I turned around and looked at the clan of girls behind me who first looked oblivious but then simultaneously started chanting, "Kill him! Kill him! Kill him!" I looked back at Mr. Darrin who was giving me a skeptical glare.
"I heard rumors that you uprooted a tree and threw it at Mr. Miroku." Said Mr. Darrin randomly.
"Yeah. That was me. What of it?"
"I just want to tell you that I don't believe it for a second."
"Then why'd you bring it up?"
"I wanted clarification."
"Well you didn't get clarification because you are still obviously confused." And I thought for a minute. "Hey…we're wasting time! Go and drive the boat for us!" Then I gave him a good shove in the direction of tubing but then I noticed Mr. Shawn come strolling up the way.
"Mr. I!" he said immediately. But before he could say anything, he looked over at the girls who were still chanting and they stopped. "You're supposed to be in singing right now! Ms Brianna is wondering where you are!"
"I'm right here." I said.
"And you're SUPPOSED to be in singing!" said Mr. Shawn as he playfully pushed my shoulder. I frowned and pushed him back only I pushed him harder so he fell over.
"Oh Mr. I, you're so silly!" said Mr. Shawn as he stood back up and brushed himself off. So does this mean that he didn't want to engage in mortal combat with me? It's a shame because I knew I would win. Mr. Shawn frolicked off and I was just about to continue my senseless argument with Mr. Darrin when I realized that he had left without telling me. The NERVE!!
"Can we go to singing now?" asked Juliana.
"Never!" I answered.
"BUT I WANT TO!!!" screamed Abigail.
"Too bad!!" I said.
We stood there for a few seconds.
"Wouldn't it be better to go to singing instead of just standing here?" asked Julie. But then the bell rang. Oh well! No more singing!
I pulled out my schedule to see that we had horseback riding next. Now let's see…why do the words 'horseback riding' make my spidey senses kick and tell me that it's bad and I should not be going?
But I decided to ignore it entirely as we went up the hill and as soon as we reached the top, I remembered why horseback riding was BAD when I got a whiff of the air up there. I told the girls that I would be staying right here and not venturing further and that if they were going to try and persuade me otherwise then I would do something SO horrible that it would be…bad. I didn't need another accident happening like LAST time I had gone to horseback riding.
The girls didn't seem to care as they ran to horseback riding as if it was their favorite activity while also screaming about how they hadn't gotten to do it yet.
Suddenly, I looked up to see that there was some random male counselor coming up over the hill with Russell by his side. I was wondering why this random male counselor was with Russell and Miroku was NOT. Was it really that hard to watch ONE kid? But anyway, Russell was crying and screaming and being REALLY loud to the extent that I couldn't stand it anymore.
The counselor said that he was the fishing counselor and there had been a calamity with Miroku during fishing. I decided not to give it a second thought until the counselor said that I would now be in charge of watching Russell since he knew me the most next to Miroku. That was really uncool but I didn't get a chance to argue because the fishing counselor seemed to run off as fast as he possibly could which wasn't really all that fast and I could certainly catch up with him but I didn't really feel like it.
I looked at Russell who was still crying. "Shut up." I said but I doubt he heard me since I didn't even hear me. "SHUT UP!!!" I yelled more loudly and he abruptly quieted down but continued to whimper pathetically. "What could make you cry this much and this loudly?"
"MR. MIROKU DIED!!!!" he finally screamed. I guess it took a minute to process because I figured that was way too unrealistic because there's no way they would continue camp and drop Russell on me if someone had died but then again, Mr. Shawn is a little psychopathic at times. However, we all know that Russell tends to exaggerate.
"All right then, Russell." I said. "HOW did he die?"
Russell didn't answer, he only continued to whimper and whine.
I sighed. "Was he engulfed by a giant swirling vortex of wind?" I tried.
Russell paused for a minute, looked up at me and then nodded.
…
I am in shock.
"Miroku died?" I said.
"YES!!!" Russell screamed as he started crying again. On normal circumstances, I would not have believed Russell but since he was so specific about the giant swirling vortex of wind that I don't think that he could have possibly randomly guessed something like that.
Miroku is…dead?
Miroku can't die…yet…
I guess I should probably go and tell…some people…like Sango…and Kagome…
Since I knew exactly where Kagome was, I decided to go to her first. Russell followed after me and it didn't occur to me at the time that at the end of horseback riding, the girls in my group would wonder where I was but that didn't really matter since Miroku is dead…
On my way to the nurse's office, I spotted Sango at tubing. I approached her and just kind of stood there until she eventually turned around and noticed me.
"What are you doing here?" she asked me. Poor Sango. So oblivious. So unknowing. I suppose I should share my knowledge. But how to put it as not to upset her? After all, she's had a lot of losses.
"Miroku's dead." I said. Yeah. Straight forward.
Sango didn't say anything for a minute. "What?"
"Miroku was sucked into his air void and now he is dead." I said more specifically.
"ALL RIGHT!!!" cheered some random demons.
"SHUT UP!!!" I yelled at them and they cowered in fear. When I turned back to Sango she had this expression that was pretty horrific but I can't really describe it in words the right way. We'll just say that she looked BEYOND upset.
She then suddenly burst into tears, ran over to me and buried her face in my shoulder. We stood there for a second and all the boys ran over and all joined in a big group hug but I punted them all into the lake because I could tell that they didn't REALLY care, they probably just wanted to fondle Sango like Miroku would have done.
If he wasn't dead.
I felt a little sorry that the last thing that I had said to him was something rude and mean. I wondered if Kagome knew about this yet? So I slowly led Sango in the direction of the nurse's office and opened the door.
"What are you two doing here?" Kagome said immediately, standing up. "Sango, what is WRONG?!"
"HOSH-SAMA IS DEAD!!!" she wailed as she burst into tears but then I tapped Sango on the shoulder and pointed out the fact that Miroku was lying there on the couch, very much so alive and well. I gave him a hard look and he stared right back at me and we both looked at each other for a few seconds before Miroku suddenly cleared his throat and asked where we had gotten the impression that he was deceased.
"Russell told me!!" I yelled at him. I was mad at him. Yeah, I was real mad at him. He made me go through all that only to find out that he was actually not REALLY dead! I was so mad that I could have very well gone and killed him right then and there!
"And you BELIEVED him?" Miroku said.
"He said that you were engulfed with a swirling vortex of wind and I figured that even Russell couldn't come up with something as creatively random as that!" I yelled at him.
"Well it's certainly not my fault that you are gullible enough to believe something Russell says." Miroku said even though this clearly WAS his fault and he knew it too. I heard the door slam behind me and turned around only to see Sango stomping away and I assumed that she was infuriated with either me, Miroku, Russell or someone completely random but there was no way that she was happy. And I couldn't blame her their because I was angry too.
"What exactly happened?" Kagome asked.
"Russell told me that Miroku was engulfed in a swirling vortex of wind!" I explained.
Kagome sighed. "I'm well enough to come out of the nurse's office." She said even though that literally had absolutely nothing to do with anything we were talking about. "So I can go to field day. Can I hang with your group?"
"That has absolutely nothing to do with anything we're talking about!!" I yelled at her. "Don't you realize that we all thought that Miroku was DEAD?!"
"But he's not." Kagome said, pointing to Miroku.
"I know." I said. "But the fact that we THOUGHT he was so it's not like the only thing going through my head was…" But the bell ringing interrupted me. I decided that this would be a good time to get out of here as fast as I could before Kagome ran after me since I would accidentally stumble upon Ms Keri and then Kikyo would come out of nowhere like she always does and then that would be one big HUGE mess that I would prefer to avoid right now since the fact that Miroku is not dead hasn't really processed quite yet.
It would be pointless to walk all the way back up to the smelly barn and then come all the way back to the water for swimming so I figured that since I was already here that I would just stay here.
I waited for about ten minutes and wasn't bombarded with four small children and when I was JUST about to start wondering where they all were, Russell came out of nowhere, still whining and crying. This would be a good time to explain to him the difference between a good lie and a bad lie. The lie he had told was a bad lie.
"Mr. I, you can never replace Mr. Miroku!" he cried.
"Miroku isn't dead!" I yelled at him.
"Really?" said Russell, suddenly stopping from his crying. "YAY!!"
"You can't just go around telling people that he's dead when you know very well that he ISN'T!!"
"I thought he was dead!"
"He's not!"
"YAY!!"
"Stop cheering!! I'm MAD at you!!"
"Mr. I, you're ALWAYS mad at me! I'm not sad! So are you gonna teach me how to swim?"
"No Russell. No I'm not. Today is today when I will tell you whether you have passed level one or not and frankly, Russell, you haven't. You only went in the water occasionally and when you did, all you did was splash other people and jump around like a fool. We got absolutely nothing accomplished in the past week so I'm afraid that you will have to repeat level one next year."
"Okay." Said Russell. "We can work on it next year when I'm six!"
"Don't get your hopes up." I said. "I am NOT returning next year."
"But I'm going to miss you!!" Russell yelled as he started crying again.
"Fine, I AM coming back." I said just to shut him up even though I had zero intention whatsoever of even walking in the general direction of the camp ever again.
"YAY!!" Russell cheered again.
Swimming passed without much event. Only about half way through did it start to nag me that okay, Miroku is NOT dead so why was he in the nurse's office? Probably because he didn't want to be with Russell anymore so he was pretending to be sick…or poisoned…
When swimming ended, I left Russell there and started my way back to my cabin. Amidst all the chaos and conversations around me, my super hearing picked up Russell's footsteps following me. I turned around to see that my ears had not failed me and that Russell was, in fact, walking right behind me, acting as though he was in my group and this way was even REMOTELY in the direction of the nurse's office, Miroku or his cabin.
I demanded to know why he was following me and told me that he was in my group now. Now, by this time I had learned never to trust a word Russell said so I told him to run along and go back over to Miroku but Russell reminded me that Miroku was in the nurse's office. I told him to go to Miroku anyway so Russell shrugged and ran off.
So I continued on my merry way back to my cabin. Actually, it wasn't too merry considering this day was going by extra slow since I was anticipating the ending of it.
When I opened the door, all the girls were standing there as if they had been waiting my return and then demanded to know where I had been and why I wasn't there to pick them up after horseback riding and why I had been walking so slowly right now because I was making them late for the special cook-out lunch party.
I cleverly decided to simply ignore all their questions and demands and pushed right by them, changed into something dry and then made my way down to the building for lunch with the girls following behind me still asking about where I had been but I still ignored them.
We were one of the last groups to come in and when we reached the table, Russell was sitting there. I reminded him that he was not supposed to be here but suddenly, Mr. Shawn came over.
"Mr. I, he asked specifically for you to be his replacement counselor!" he told me.
"But he already has a counselor." I pointed out.
"His counselor has the chicken pox." Mr. Shawn said, putting his hands on his hips. That didn't really mean anything to me so I repeated that he already had a counselor. "Well, YOU'RE his new counselor then."
"Can't he go with the little boys who are I don't know…six?" I tried.
"No, Russell requested you for his counselor." Mr. Shawn answered.
"So?!" I almost yelled. "Who cares what Russell wants?! He told me that Miroku died so…"
"Mr. Miroku's DEAD?!" Mr. Shawn demanded.
"No…we came to the conclusion that he wasn't." I answered trying ever so hard to hide all anger in my voice for reasons unknown.
"Don't scare me like that!" said Mr. Shawn as he put his hand on my shoulder. I stared at him momentarily and then pushed it off. "So anyway, Russell's in your group until Mr. Miroku feels better. But that really won't be for another week or so…"
"A week?!" I demanded. "You mean I have to take care of him for a week?!"
There's no way THAT'S going to happen.
"Mr. I, camp ends at the end of the day. All you have to do is leave and your problems with Mr. Miroku are over forever!"
Feh.
Mr. Shawn then laughed for about a minute straight while I just glared at him. I hoped that maybe he would see me, see my anger, see my annoyance and just leave. I also hoped that he would take Russell with him. But he didn't. He just left without Russell.
"YAY MR. I!!" cheered Russell.
I ignored Russell for the time being and finally got to my lunch table. There wasn't much time left for lunch but there was plenty of food considering all of the campers under seven got sick and went home. So I ate lunch quickly because I didn't want to end up with anyone telling me that I couldn't finish my lunch because time ran out.
The bell rang a second later and we were sent to our little areas for group time. This is the last group time ever!!
I gathered my group together and told them that we would have to incorporate Russell into our skit since he was added to our group.
"But Mr. I!" whined Emily. "We have the whole thing planned out!"
"No kidding." I said. "Don't you think I've tried to get him out?"
"Can't we just leave him somewhere by himself? Who cares what happens to him! If he gets hurt, we can blame it on Mr. Miroku since he's Russell's REAL counselor!" said Julia. No wonder Julia's my favorite camper.
"I've considered it." I said. Pretty soon, Sarah announced that she had the most PERFECT idea in the world in order to put Russell in the skit and I said whatever and let them all do their little thing. I sat down on the ground and decided not to participate in any way, shape or form.
I heard screaming, shouting, yelling, crying and all kinds of things that shouldn't go unchecked but they did. Then the bell rang. It wasn't the normal bell, however. It was some sort of possessed sounding freak bell. I looked down at my decorated schedule to see that we had something called 'Field Day' and we were all to meet in the soccer field.
What kind of stupid holiday is in honor of a stupid FIELD?! Whatever it was, I was not going to like but I was going to stick through it because this is almost over and then I will be leaving and never coming back. Ever.
Sarah led the way to the soccer field and we all noticed (except for maybe Russell) that the field was decorated and had all kinds of various activities and booths set up all over it.
Mr. Shawn was standing in the middle of a huge group of kids and counselors. He pulled out a cone shaped thing and started yelling into it. The cone shaped thing only seemed to make his voice louder than it already was and if my ears weren't on the top of my head, I would have blocked them because he was so loud.
He explained rules, regulations and told us to just follow what was on my schedule. Glancing at my schedule, I read in big, bold letter, 'DUNKING BOOTH'.
I didn't like the sound of that.
Sarah screamed that ear-piercing scream thing that she does and ran off in some direction. Everyone else (including me, I don't know why) followed her and we eventually were brought to a big bowl-like thing filled with water that had a chair in it.
"Mr. I, hop on in!" said some random female counselor in a cheery voice. What the hell is that thing?!
So I shrugged and jumped up and into it. A few people gasped but I ignored them. I sat down on the chair and watched.
"Now what?" I asked as the counselor lowered the cover to the bowl thing down.
The counselor handed each girl in my group a ball and told them to throw them at a target. I failed to see the purpose to this because they all missed and I had no idea why I was forced to sit in this box thing.
Then, from out of nowhere, I heard my name called.
"INU-YASHA!!!" came a familiar voice. I turned my head around to be greeted with Kagome from outside the plastic. "You're in the dunking booth!"
"Yeah…so?"
"Let me try, Ms Kim!" Kagome exclaimed as Ms Kim handed her a ball. Kagome wound up and threw it at the target. I followed the ball with my eyes all the way until it hit the target. I don't know what happened then because the next moment I knew, I was submerged in cold water.
I came out of the water and I must have looked REALLY angry (because I was, out of all truth, REALLY angry) because all the girls in my group screamed and pointed to Kagome.
"I KNOW WHO DID IT!!" I yelled but my voice echoed throughout the container. The counselor that ran this particular event opened the top and I jumped out in front of Kagome. "YOU…YOU!! YOU…ARE…"
I didn't even know what to say. I was so mad and SO wet and SO surprised that I was just in shock.
"Calm down Inu-Yasha." Said Kagome. "It's no big deal."
"YOU'RE not the one who's wet!"
Then Kagome gave a long, hard sigh. What's that supposed to mean?!
"Geez…I try to have a little fun…" she said.
FUN?! This was fun?!
"FUN?!" I demanded. "This was fun?!"
"Never mind." Said Kagome. "I'll never ask you to do it again."
"I'll forgive you if I can dunk you." I said even though it wasn't true. I just wanted to dunk her for dunking me. Kagome suddenly looked happy as she climbed into the dunking booth at the speed of light as if that was what she was waiting for. I walked up to the target and punched it. Instantly, Kagome dropped into the water.
It WAS a lot more fun from the other side of the cage. I laughed at her as she emerged from the water and climbed out, looking angry.
She stomped up to me looking like she was going to kill me. "Inu-Yasha!!"
By now, Kagome was using her scary, angry voice, which I don't like. I was about to cower in fear and apologize when she started laughing. I don't even know WHAT to think with Kagome. I sat down on the ground and she sat down next to me.
And that was followed by a long awkward silence except for the noise of my stupid group behind me dunking each other.
"So…are you feeling better?" I asked. (It was kind of obvious that she DID feel better but I hate silences when I'm with someone.)
"Yeah…" said Kagome. "I felt better yesterday morning but they wouldn't let me leave."
"Why not?" I asked. They let the kids go home when they were sick, why can't they let the counselors go home? "If they HAD let you leave, you would have taken us, right?" Kagome started laughing as if there was anything funny to even laugh at.
"No!" Kagome said as she leaned over on top of me. "They wouldn't let me leave the nurse's office! I wouldn't want to leave Camp Walawalabingbang!"
"Why not?!"
"Because it's fun!"
Kagome must have a really warped definition of fun because if THIS was fun then…um…it must be opposite day or something.
"Yeah…fun…" I said. I had wanted to tell her that this was stupid but I didn't for some reason and now I regret it because she might have taken over my group and let me go home.
I suddenly heard that really deranged, not normal sounding bell and we had to move on to the next activity, which was face painting. I don't see how we can spend an entire hour painting each other's faces and there was NO way ANY of them were getting a paintbrush near my face.
"Mr. I!" screamed Sarah. She is getting more and more annoying each day. "Draw YOU on my face!"
"No." I answered.
"Why not?" she asked.
"Because."
That was all the reasons she needed.
"Then draw…um…Ms Keri cause you love her!"
"Who's Ms Keri?!" Kagome demanded. What an idiot. I can't believe she's actually listening to some stupid little girl.
"My stalker." I answered. Kagome nodded her head and looked as though she didn't believe me. I could tell but I chose not to care.
"Then draw you with BLACK hair on my face!" Sarah said.
"No!" I yelled. "You can't have ME on your face!"
"But I want a person!" she insisted. "And you're my favorite counselor." Naturally.
"Pick someone else." I said. "Because I will not paint me on your face."
"Draw a picture of Mr. Miroku with 'X' eyes and blood all around him!!" Sarah said with a laugh. All the other girls laughed and asked for that too.
"THAT'S NOT FUNNY!!!" I yelled. I've had enough dead Mirokus to last me the rest of my life.
"Done!" Kagome said as she finished painting Jesse's face. She moved to the side to reveal that she had given Jesse two red stripes on her cheeks and a blue crescent moon on her forehead.
Now who did that remind me of?
"It's Sessho-Maru!" said Kagome in a sickeningly happy voice. It is! HOW COULD SHE!!!
"I KNOW who it is!" I said even though that was kind of a lie. SHE didn't need to know that. "WHY is Jesse now Sessho-Maru?!"
"Um…why not?!" Kagome said as if that wouldn't bother me.
"Because I hate my brother!" Jesse was one of my least favorite campers to begin with but now that she looks like Sessho-Maru, I hate her even more!
"Fine." Said Kagome with a sigh. "No more Sessho-Marus."
"There better not be."
"There WON'T!" Kagome yelled. "Geez…I'm sick for a week and this is how you treat me?"
"Apparently so." I said with a shrug. Then Kagome burst into tears and ran off only AFTER saying that word that I know hate so much; SIT!!
After I had sufficiently spit out all the grass from my mouth and brushed the dirt off of the shirt that the camp had provided for me, I considered chasing after Kagome but I didn't because I didn't want her to think that she won. She's so annoying when she waits for ME to come to HER and apologize as if it was ME who did anything wrong in the first place. I don't know how I can stand being around her!
I wasn't going to let the thought of Kagome alone and cold somewhere while crying and being mad at me plague my mind. What do I care if she gets attacked and killed by a demon who actually wanted to kill ME?!
I turned around to see that Sarah was now engaged in painting a makeshift version of Sessho-Maru like Jesse's face on Russell. I yelled at her to stop but she only told me that if she couldn't have ME on her face then she would have my brother.
So I grabbed the face paint away from her and pushed Russell out of the way. As soon as I started drawing, I knew that my picture would just end up looking like crap, not to mention the fact that Sarah was laughing and moving around ever so excessively and talking and pretending as though I WASN'T trying to draw something. I told her I was done and she picked up the mirror and looked at it to see my beautiful picture of a bucket.
"That doesn't look like you!" Sarah whined.
"When did I ever say I was drawing ME?!" I said. "Don't you appreciate the bucket I made for you?! Do you want me to wipe it off?!"
"NO!! I LOVE IT!!!" Sarah screamed. So all the girls got in line and had buckets on their faces by the end of face painting except for Russell who was half Sessho-Maru AND had a bucket and Jesse who stayed Sessho-Maru, curse that child. By the time I got all the way to Julia, who was last in line, my bucket actually resembled a bucket as opposed to a brown blob like the one on Sarah's face.
"You need a bucket on your face too, Mr. I!" said Julia once I had finished.
"That's okay. I'll pass." I answered.
Just then, a random male counselor walked over. "Um…sorry I'm late." He said. He told me he was in the bathroom. He told me he was constipated. I told him that I didn't want to hear about those kinds of things.
The freak bell rang and then we walked across the entire field to come across the 'Pie Hurl' station. Sango was just leaving and she waved at me but I didn't really do anything since I didn't feel like it but I knew she wouldn't take it personally so I didn't let it bother me. Apparently, she was a little more collected than the last time I had saw her, back when Miroku died. But he's alive now so everything's okay.
"I'm gonna throw the pie as far as I can!!" Russell declared as he ran up to grab a pie but a female counselor who just so happened to be Ms Alice stopped him and told him that she had to explain the rules first. I didn't really know what Pie Hurl was so I just tuned her out until suddenly, all the girls…and Russell…were swarming around me while screaming my name.
"Looks like you're they're choice, Mr. I!" said Ms Alice.
"Whatever." I said. I was instructed to go down to a piece of wood with a hole in it and stick my head through it. I had learned my lesson from the dunking booth and now know never to do anything that I don't know the first thing about so I promptly refused.
"Come on Mr. I!" whined Abigail.
"Why don't YOU put YOUR head through the hole?" I said. She started crying. What else would she do?
So eventually, we got it so that Russell had his head coming out of the hole. Every girl in my group started throwing pies at Russell's exposed head until I realized that this could potentially be fun so I picked up and pie and was just about to throw it when Ms Alice stopped me and told me that the game was for the children. I told her to shut up but she only got angry with me and came closer.
Unfortunately, Ms Alice's smell is repugnant enough from afar but when she came closer, I felt faint and needed to back off. I put the pie down and went to go sit on the OTHER side of the 'Pie Hurl' area. I got to watch as every girl in the group got to have fun and throw pies at Russell until he declared that he wasn't having fun anymore but no one stopped.
This caused a round of chuckling at my part watching the kid who had annoyed me ever so much get pelted with numerous pies which were actually just cupcake wrappers filled with tiny amounts whipped cream.
The screwed up sounding bell rang again and Mr. Shawn held up his cone thing and announced for everyone to go down to the waterfront. He told us that we were going to be performing our skits now and that the stage made the most 'awesome possum' stage.
Russell walked up to me and said that his face was dirty and I told him that we were going to the waterfront and he could wash it in the lake so he started running as if I had said, 'I'll race you to the waterfront, Russell!' Which, of course, never happened.
We reached the beach and Russell cleaned his face off but Mr. Shawn yelled at me as if I had done anything wrong at all. Everyone had to sit on little picnic tables that were scattered around the beach and some people had to sit on the ground.
Like us.
A bunch of random groups who I didn't know got up and performed some stupid skits that were the opposite of entertaining but everyone had to go and clap as if it was nice to watch. Suddenly, I sensed that Miroku was standing behind me. I spun around to see that he was, in fact, standing right over me watching the current skit that was being performed. I could smell sickness on him, so why was he standing near me?
"What are you doing?" I asked him.
"The nurse permitted me to come out and watch the skits." He answered as he sat down next to me. Only then did I notice the hideous red spots all over his face and arms and legs and every other part of his human flesh that was exposed.
"It's not contagious, is it?" I said.
He looked at me as if I were asking a stupid question, which I wasn't, and then looked at his arm. "Yes." He answered. "It's terribly contagious."
"THEN WHY ARE YOU SITTING NEXT TO ME?!" I yelled as I stood up and backed away from him. Mr. Shawn stomped over and demanded to know why I had yelled and interrupted the skits. I informed him that Miroku had intentionally come over and sat down next to me just so I would catch the chicken pox. Mr. Shawn told me that I was being silly and couldn't catch the chicken pox at my current age but I reminded him that Miroku was older than I, and he had the chicken pox. Right now.
"Well, that's a really rare case." Said Mr. Shawn.
"Precisely, Inu-Yasha." Said Miroku in an annoying, smug voice. "It's a very rare case."
Then Mr. Shawn frolicked off to go and watch the stupid skits.
Even if I wanted to, I couldn't keep my mind on the skits just knowing that all of the sickness that Miroku carried could be potentially wafting in my general direction.
"You look really disgusting." I told Miroku.
"Thanks for telling me." Said Miroku in a grumpy voice. He had no reason to be grumpy! He wasn't sitting next to a contagious person. But then again, he WAS the contagious person so maybe he has reason, if not more to be grumpy.
"So how does one go about catching the chicken pox?" I asked. "You should know, you have them."
"I don't know." Said Miroku. "I didn't even know such a disease existed until this morning and now I know all about it except how to get it."
Suddenly Sango came over, sat next to me and asked about my skit. I was just about to answer her when she noticed Miroku and looked as though she was about to start laughing.
"Don't let my group see you, Hosh-sama!" she said as she DID start laughing. You know, I thought Sango was more sensitive than that. I watched Miroku's face fall and I could tell that he was going to throw some sort of stoic retort back at her but he didn't. He only sat there as if he had actually gotten his feelings hurt. For some strange reason that I can't even explain, I kind of felt bad for him right then and there for being all contagious and spotted and sick and other kinds of things that no one really wants to be.
Sango continued laughing at her joke and clearly she didn't see the depressed expression on Miroku's face but she had to stop when Mr. Shawn told everyone to be quiet, mainly pointed in our general direction since we were being kind of loud.
He said that the next group up was The Bunnies and I didn't even have a chance to think about the fact that everyone in Miroku's entire group went home except for Russell so how could they do that when Mr. Shawn suddenly slapped his knee and reminded himself and the rest of the camp that The Bunnies were home sick. Then Russell felt it necessary to scream that he was still there and Mr. Shawn only shot him an evil glare.
"And…we'll continue with our utterly random order and go onto Kazoom!" Mr. Shawn declared as the camp started clapping. Sango got up and ran off to the stage where she met up with her hideous demons as well as the kid that I had come very close to smiting the other day.
"For our skit…" started the misfit kid. "We are doing the dating game."
Everyone in the audience clapped even though they hadn't even done anything yet.
I didn't understand what was going on but I did know that one kid up there was supposed to be Miroku and they were making him act really stupid and loud and annoying. I kept glancing at Miroku to see what his reaction to this was but he seemed semi-out-of-it. One kid was supposed to be Sango and what it looked like to me was that the Miroku kid and two others were telling things about themselves while the kid pretending to be Sango said stupid things depending on what the others said.
I don't get it.
Suddenly, Miroku stood up and yelled down to Sango's horrible group that they were doing a horrible job impersonating him. Then, just as suddenly as when he had stood up, he ran off.
I assumed that he was extremely upset about that and went off to cry or something but that wasn't like him to do that.
I chose not to dwell on that as I (as well as the rest of the camp) averted their eyes back to Sango's group as they finished their skit. The entire audience applauded and I assumed it was just to humor them because they certainly didn't deserve it.
Sango came back and asked how they had done and I lied and said that it was amusing but she knew it was a lie.
"Where'd Hosh-sama go?" she asked.
"How should I know?" I said.
"Do you think he was offended by our skit?" Sango asked.
"At first, no." I said. "But when he ran off to cry or something, I changed my mind."
Sango then looked distraught but that really had nothing to do with me.
"Where did he run?"
I shrugged even though I knew very well.
A few other groups went and it was really excruciating because the skits are SO stupid!
I suddenly felt a tap on my shoulder and turned around to see Kagome.
"I would advise you and Sango to stay away from Miroku." She whispered to me. She must have forgotten about being really mad at me. Oh well. I was about to respond to her when my group was called down.
Now it's not like my group needed me or anything because I wasn't really part of their little presentation so I just stood up and stood in the little path to the shore and watched them.
Rachel stepped forward and introduced our group.
"Our group is The Dogs and we are doing 'the lawnmower skit'." She said. A couple of others yelled things like, 'What if they don't know what the lawnmower skit is?!' or 'Say it louder!'.
I laughed at Rachel's stupidity and the fact that she was one of my least favorite campers made it all the more hilarious.
Now, okay, they started the skit. It started out with Leah and Katie standing around Rachel who was crouched down, talking about how they just couldn't seem to be able to start the lawnmower which I presumed was Rachel.
All of a sudden, Jesse walked out and started saying stuff but no matter what she said, Leah and Katie always snapped at her as if she was the stupidest counselor in the entire camp. They were calling her Mr. Miroku. Julie, Emily and Abigail came out one by one, attempting to start the lawnmower but Rachel just kept mumbling 'put put put'. I considered going over there and commanding her to 'start' but I didn't because Julia had just started to strut pompously out on the set.
"Mr. I!!" said no female in particular. "Please start our lawnmower!"
"No problem!" said Julia in the lowest voice she could produce, which wasn't very low because she started laughing hysterically in the middle of her sentence. However, before Julia could go and attempt to 'start' Rachel, Sarah came on the set while swinging her hips dramatically. Julia turned around. "Oh! It's you Ms Keri!"
I knew it wasn't going to get any better. Julia and Sarah then started to flirt at one another and I was going to very well go over there and end the skit right then when I realized that Juliana had not yet made her appearance. Then she came on, saying that she was Ms Kagome.
I slapped my forehead and shook my head. The lawnmower skit was quickly turned into a soap opera that ended up in 'me' marrying 'Ms Keri' and 'Ms Kagome' dying due to a horrible heart disease as well as a fight to the death and 'Miroku' dying very graphically at the end.
So I stood there in a stupefied state and I'm pretty sure that everyone in the camp was a little upset that one of their classics, the lawnmower skit had been completely butchered to shreds and according to all of them, it was ALL MY FAULT. Mr. Shawn stood up and started clapping and everyone else joined in as if they had just remembered that they had to clap too.
I turned around just in time to see Kagome walking over to me. She looked mad. Why was she mad at me? Did she think that I had planned out the whole skit? She must have. Because she said sit a few times until she felt satisfied. Come on, what makes her think that I would plan something as idiotic as what we just witnessed?!
So a few other groups went and pretty soon, the bell rang again. It was the normal sounding bell, however. I was starting to wonder why the bell was going through mood swings. Perhaps it was the person ringing it.
Mr. Shawn motioned everyone to the dining area where we would eat our last dinner at the camp! I almost shouted 'YAY!!' right then and there but I didn't want anyone to think I was having fun at the camp.
Dinner was supposedly this wonderful feast that had been specially prepared but it only looked and smelled like all of the past dinners all splurged into one disgusting dish. Though it went against everything I believed in, I ate it anyway. It wasn't half bad either. It was probably the best thing I had eaten this entire week but I wasn't about to TELL anyone that I actually liked it.
It went for an exceptionally long time and Mr. Shawn walked up to his little podium and announced some stuff that obviously wasn't important because I didn't listen and it didn't affect my immediate future. A few counselors walked up, and Mr. Shawn gave them something.
Why wasn't he giving ME anything?
Abruptly, Mr. Shawn ran out the door. It might not have been so abrupt to anyone else but it seemed so to me. The bell rang a few seconds later and I figured that Mr. Shawn had run to the bell so that he could ring it. What a freak.
I had no idea where to go because of this extremely unorganized day so I just followed the mob in front of me to the place where 'campfire time' usually took place. Mr. Shawn was already there, looking as though he had been there for hours, eagerly awaiting our arrival. We all settled down and Mr. Shawn said some more stuff that I kind of ignored and then he asked for the loudest camper in the entire group and I immediately pointed at Sarah and she cheered and ran down to the front.
What happened next was definitely not expected. Apparently, the loudest camper in the group was to go down there and scream at the top of their lungs and whoever screamed the loudest got a prize for the whole group. It was dumb. My ears hurt. They still do.
When I finally could hear something besides the pounding on my head and the ringing in my ears, Sarah ran up and showed me a basket that she had won. I knew that she would win. But then she told me that Mr. Shawn gave them all prizes since he said that they were all winners so I had gone through all that pain for absolutely no reason whatsoever. In the basket was an assortment of brown bars wrapped in foil, which the girls screamed and called them candy bars. So they each took one, and I didn't know whether or not to give Russell one but that would be surrendering half of MY candy bar so I gave him half of it.
Mr. Shawn then got all of our attention again. He wiped a tear from his eye and said how this was his most enjoyable year yet and I figured that he said that EVERY year and then told us all to run off to the cabin to pack since everyone was leaving in the morning.
Finally. One more night and then I could go home and do…stuff.
So we all took our candy bars back to the cabin and the girls immediately started packing. Russell told me that he was too tired and lied down on MY bed. MY BED. The nerve! But I got over it a second later because I realized that I didn't really use my bed so it was okay with me. In the end, I ended up packing up all of Russell's stuff which didn't take that long considering everything Russell owned was tiny, ESPECIALLY compared to what I usually wear.
The girls washed off their Sessho-Maru paint and bucket paint, changed into the pajamas and then got to bed. I paced around for a minute or two and then turned the lights off and sat down next to my bed. (Russell…snored.)
Suddenly, before I had even fallen asleep, I heard the bell ring. It didn't stop either. It just kept ringing as if it was trying to make sure that everyone was awake. Of course everyone was awake, they hadn't even gotten a chance to go to sleep yet! That made me stop and wonder why the bell was ringing five seconds after we had been sent to bed since the bell means that we have to wake up and it is certainly not time to wake up. Could it possibly have already been morning? The girls started whining as I looked out the window to see that it was still dark. I figured someone must have just been being stupid because the bell then stopped a few minutes later. I told everyone to go back to sleep and I took my spot again.