[b] LIGHTS AND SHADOWS [/b]
b Time frame: /b Post Vector Prime. This fic does not follow the Yuuzhan Vong invasion
b PG rating: /b 13
b Disclaimer: /b Star Wars and all its characters, places etc. are not owned by me. They belong the Lucas Ltd. However, all the original characters, names and places do belong to me [face_grin]
b Story line: /b When Jaina disappears mysteriously, her family and friends are left with no clue as to where she is, or if she's even alive. Will they ever know what happened?
b Author's notes: /b This is an AU fan fiction focusing on Jaina. In this story the Yuuzhan Vong haven't invaded and probably never will. This story takes different POV's!
[b] DRAMATIS PERSONAE [/b]
[i] With the New Republic: [/i]
Luke Skywalker; Jedi Master (male human)
Mara Jade Skywalker; Jedi Master (female human)
Han Solo; captain Millennium Falcon (male human)
Leia Organa Solo; New Republic Ambassador (female human)
Jaina Solo; Lieutenant Rogue Squadron, Jedi Knight (female human)
Jacen Solo; Jedi Knight (male human)
Anakin Solo; Jedi Knight (male human)
Kyp Durron; Jedi Master (male human)
Tahiri Veila; Jedi Knight (male human)
[i] With the Tuath de Roann: [/i]
Darin Carey, teacher (male Breage)
Kieran Carey, lieutenant Sunliners (male Breage)
Rowann Ri, Leader Tuath de Roann (male Breage)
Quillaine Ri, (female Breage)
Caradeg, advisor (male Breage)
Serena, Captain Black Lancers (female Breage)
Lainn, Jaina's comapnion
[i] With the Clann Morgal: [/i]
Morgal Farall, leader Clann Morgal (male Breage)
Tamasin Farall, lieutenant Scouts (male Breage)
Fioll, advisor (male Breage)
[b] LIGHTS AND SHADOWS [/b]
[b] PROLOGUE [/b]
JAINA
Afraid. A Jedi knows no fear. That's what my uncle always said. But at the moment I was no Jedi. I was a Rogue Squadron pilot, my call sign Sticks, who was about to die. I never thought it would be like this. I wonder what's going to happen when I die. Will I see my grandfather Anakin Skywalker, or become a spirit like Obi-wan was or nothing? Would it be painful? I always said I wasn't afraid to die, but I realized now, at this very moment, that it was a lie. I was scared out of my mind.
All these thought drummed in my mind, mere seconds after the runaway enemy A-Wing had crushed my XJX-Wing. I had no control over ship anymore. My astromech was gone. The XJX-Wing was dead in space. In a few minutes it would explode. Because nothing worked anymore I couldn't go EV. All I could do was wait for death to come. I never felt so helpless in my entire 19 years.
I sucked in a deep breath and closed my eyes. Far away in my mind I could feel Jacen panicking. He knew that I was going to die. So did Anakin and my mother. I could also feel my aunt and uncle. Jedi Masters. Trying to be calm, but failing. On some level she could even feel her little cousin Ben, now three years old, not understanding what was happening and Kyp. Kyp? It took the fear away for a moment, wondering why she could feel the rogue.
My thoughts vanished into the corner of my mind when I felt the XJX-Wing heating up. It was a matter of seconds now. I said my farewells to my family and friends
before closing myself completely of from the Force. I didn't want them to feel my pain when I died.
I opened my eyes one last time to look at the galaxy. But it wasn't all darkness and stars. A bright blue vortex had opened in front of A-Wing, which was floating dead in space before me. It was pulling us in. Then it hit me. A bright clear pain erupted in my mind before I drifted of into darkness.
[b] CORUSCANT [/b]
LEIA
It felt like my heart was ripped out and torn into pieces. There was an emptiness there that would never be filled again. My daughter, my only daughter was gone and would never be coming back. I was standing in the living room of the apartment where Han and I lived. I had been alone when I felt Jaina's fear. I had known something was wrong, but I never dreamed she would die. Not my child. This was my greatest fear becoming reality. I wanted to break down, to scream and cry. To tear this place apart. But I couldn't. I couldn't move.
I didn't know how long I had been standing there when Han came bursting into our apartment. He'd been out playing sabbac with some old friends. Lando was right behind him. Their voices were cheerful and enthusiastic.
"Sweetheart, you'll never believe what…" I hear his voice stopping abruptly, probably because he saw me. I couldn't find the strength to face him, to tell him his daughter was dead, but somehow I did.
"Leia, what's wrong?" Han asked. Lando had fallen silent too. Quietly observing the situation. When I faced Han his face fell blank and I didn't have to tell him. He knew.
That was when the spell broke and I screamed and cried until I felt my husband's arms around me. He didn't say anything, he just held me close. Nothing would ever be the same again.
[b] YAVIN FOUR [/b]
JACEN
I had just walked into my aunt and uncle's apartment in the great temple when it hit me. Jaina. She was in trouble. She was hurt. I didn't bother to knock. I barged in to find that uncle Luke and aunt Mara already knew. They looked at me stricken. "Jacen," uncle Luke said.
"No," I cried out. "No, she's not dead yet. She's not going to die. She can't. She's my sister." I breathed hard and then I realized my words were not true. I was going to loose her and I there was nothing I could do. I tried not to panic, but it screamed for inside me, it took control of me. I tried to calm myself but I couldn't. She's my sister. She couldn't leave me alone. I wouldn't survive. She's my twin sister, everything we did, we did together. She's a part of me. I fell to floor not able stand anymore. She's going to die and there was nothing I could do about it.
I felt strong hands grip my shoulders. At first I thought it was Uncle Luke, but when I turned I saw it was Anakin. His face was white. Off course he knew to. He's stronger in the Force than me. Unshed tears were in his eyes. In the corner of the room I saw his blonde friend, Tahiri, stand. I looked down again.
I tried to reach for her again, but felt she cut herself off. Typically Jaina. Always thinking of others, instead off herself. I didn't matter. I could still feel her through our twin bond. She was still there. The last thing I got from her was confusion, then a blast of pain clouded my senses. For a moment everything went black. Then there was only emptiness. She was gone. I could vaguely hear my aunt crying. It wasn't like Mara at all to cry. Uncle Luke held her close, his face covered in Mara's red gold hair. Anakin still had my shoulders in an iron grip. Anger rose up from deep inside. Anger I never knew had existed inside me. I broke loose from Anakin's grip and ran for the door. Tears were clouding my vision. I didn't care, I just ran.
ANAKIN
I was still stunned from my sister's death when Jacen ran away. She was dead, how could she be dead. She was a Jedi Knight. She was my sister. She couldn't die. I knew she had closed herself of, but I felt the physical pain from Jacen. Jaina was gone and I realized this must be even harder for Jacen; he would never be the same again. So I ran after him. I never knew my brother could run so fast. Behind me I could hear Tahiri calling out my name. It didn't matter now. All that mattered now was making sure Jacen would make it. I always had known how strong their twin bond was. Even when they hadn't realized it themselves. Sometime I had been jealous of their bond, but now I was glad I didn't have one.
Jacen ran out of the great temple, straight for the Jungle. I called out his name several times, but he didn't seem to hear me. I tried to reach him with the Force, but I hit a brick wall. He was completely closed of.
He ran deeper into the jungle. It didn't look like he knew where he was going. He just ran. When I thought I was never going to catch on, I saw him trip over a rock and he fell down. He didn't move, so at fist I thought he was unconscious, but when I reached him got up. To stop him from running away again I grabbed him by his arm. "No," Jacen said and tried to pull away, but held him tight.
"Common Jacen, pull yourself together. Jaina wouldn't want this. She would want you to be strong," I cried to him. Seeing Jacen like this hurt me even more than Jaina dying. I felt hot tears falling down.
Jacen seemed to calm down after that. He fell down crying and I held him close. Jaina was gone and she would never be coming back. I didn't know how long we had been there, when uncle Luke came. He didn't say anything; we just picked Jacen up and helped him back to the academy.
SOMEWHERE IN THE JEDI ACADEMY
I felt her dying and then nothing. She was gone and I never got to tell her. I fell down on the bed I'd just made. She was gone and I didn't tell her.
[hr]
I'll never leave. Not even if you kill me
--David Boreanaz "Angel"
[hr]
b Time frame: /b Post Vector Prime. This fic does not follow the Yuuzhan Vong invasion
b PG rating: /b 13
b Disclaimer: /b Star Wars and all its characters, places etc. are not owned by me. They belong the Lucas Ltd. However, all the original characters, names and places do belong to me [face_grin]
b Story line: /b When Jaina disappears mysteriously, her family and friends are left with no clue as to where she is, or if she's even alive. Will they ever know what happened?
b Author's notes: /b This is an AU fan fiction focusing on Jaina. In this story the Yuuzhan Vong haven't invaded and probably never will. This story takes different POV's!
[b] DRAMATIS PERSONAE [/b]
[i] With the New Republic: [/i]
Luke Skywalker; Jedi Master (male human)
Mara Jade Skywalker; Jedi Master (female human)
Han Solo; captain Millennium Falcon (male human)
Leia Organa Solo; New Republic Ambassador (female human)
Jaina Solo; Lieutenant Rogue Squadron, Jedi Knight (female human)
Jacen Solo; Jedi Knight (male human)
Anakin Solo; Jedi Knight (male human)
Kyp Durron; Jedi Master (male human)
Tahiri Veila; Jedi Knight (male human)
[i] With the Tuath de Roann: [/i]
Darin Carey, teacher (male Breage)
Kieran Carey, lieutenant Sunliners (male Breage)
Rowann Ri, Leader Tuath de Roann (male Breage)
Quillaine Ri, (female Breage)
Caradeg, advisor (male Breage)
Serena, Captain Black Lancers (female Breage)
Lainn, Jaina's comapnion
[i] With the Clann Morgal: [/i]
Morgal Farall, leader Clann Morgal (male Breage)
Tamasin Farall, lieutenant Scouts (male Breage)
Fioll, advisor (male Breage)
[b] LIGHTS AND SHADOWS [/b]
[b] PROLOGUE [/b]
JAINA
Afraid. A Jedi knows no fear. That's what my uncle always said. But at the moment I was no Jedi. I was a Rogue Squadron pilot, my call sign Sticks, who was about to die. I never thought it would be like this. I wonder what's going to happen when I die. Will I see my grandfather Anakin Skywalker, or become a spirit like Obi-wan was or nothing? Would it be painful? I always said I wasn't afraid to die, but I realized now, at this very moment, that it was a lie. I was scared out of my mind.
All these thought drummed in my mind, mere seconds after the runaway enemy A-Wing had crushed my XJX-Wing. I had no control over ship anymore. My astromech was gone. The XJX-Wing was dead in space. In a few minutes it would explode. Because nothing worked anymore I couldn't go EV. All I could do was wait for death to come. I never felt so helpless in my entire 19 years.
I sucked in a deep breath and closed my eyes. Far away in my mind I could feel Jacen panicking. He knew that I was going to die. So did Anakin and my mother. I could also feel my aunt and uncle. Jedi Masters. Trying to be calm, but failing. On some level she could even feel her little cousin Ben, now three years old, not understanding what was happening and Kyp. Kyp? It took the fear away for a moment, wondering why she could feel the rogue.
My thoughts vanished into the corner of my mind when I felt the XJX-Wing heating up. It was a matter of seconds now. I said my farewells to my family and friends
before closing myself completely of from the Force. I didn't want them to feel my pain when I died.
I opened my eyes one last time to look at the galaxy. But it wasn't all darkness and stars. A bright blue vortex had opened in front of A-Wing, which was floating dead in space before me. It was pulling us in. Then it hit me. A bright clear pain erupted in my mind before I drifted of into darkness.
[b] CORUSCANT [/b]
LEIA
It felt like my heart was ripped out and torn into pieces. There was an emptiness there that would never be filled again. My daughter, my only daughter was gone and would never be coming back. I was standing in the living room of the apartment where Han and I lived. I had been alone when I felt Jaina's fear. I had known something was wrong, but I never dreamed she would die. Not my child. This was my greatest fear becoming reality. I wanted to break down, to scream and cry. To tear this place apart. But I couldn't. I couldn't move.
I didn't know how long I had been standing there when Han came bursting into our apartment. He'd been out playing sabbac with some old friends. Lando was right behind him. Their voices were cheerful and enthusiastic.
"Sweetheart, you'll never believe what…" I hear his voice stopping abruptly, probably because he saw me. I couldn't find the strength to face him, to tell him his daughter was dead, but somehow I did.
"Leia, what's wrong?" Han asked. Lando had fallen silent too. Quietly observing the situation. When I faced Han his face fell blank and I didn't have to tell him. He knew.
That was when the spell broke and I screamed and cried until I felt my husband's arms around me. He didn't say anything, he just held me close. Nothing would ever be the same again.
[b] YAVIN FOUR [/b]
JACEN
I had just walked into my aunt and uncle's apartment in the great temple when it hit me. Jaina. She was in trouble. She was hurt. I didn't bother to knock. I barged in to find that uncle Luke and aunt Mara already knew. They looked at me stricken. "Jacen," uncle Luke said.
"No," I cried out. "No, she's not dead yet. She's not going to die. She can't. She's my sister." I breathed hard and then I realized my words were not true. I was going to loose her and I there was nothing I could do. I tried not to panic, but it screamed for inside me, it took control of me. I tried to calm myself but I couldn't. She's my sister. She couldn't leave me alone. I wouldn't survive. She's my twin sister, everything we did, we did together. She's a part of me. I fell to floor not able stand anymore. She's going to die and there was nothing I could do about it.
I felt strong hands grip my shoulders. At first I thought it was Uncle Luke, but when I turned I saw it was Anakin. His face was white. Off course he knew to. He's stronger in the Force than me. Unshed tears were in his eyes. In the corner of the room I saw his blonde friend, Tahiri, stand. I looked down again.
I tried to reach for her again, but felt she cut herself off. Typically Jaina. Always thinking of others, instead off herself. I didn't matter. I could still feel her through our twin bond. She was still there. The last thing I got from her was confusion, then a blast of pain clouded my senses. For a moment everything went black. Then there was only emptiness. She was gone. I could vaguely hear my aunt crying. It wasn't like Mara at all to cry. Uncle Luke held her close, his face covered in Mara's red gold hair. Anakin still had my shoulders in an iron grip. Anger rose up from deep inside. Anger I never knew had existed inside me. I broke loose from Anakin's grip and ran for the door. Tears were clouding my vision. I didn't care, I just ran.
ANAKIN
I was still stunned from my sister's death when Jacen ran away. She was dead, how could she be dead. She was a Jedi Knight. She was my sister. She couldn't die. I knew she had closed herself of, but I felt the physical pain from Jacen. Jaina was gone and I realized this must be even harder for Jacen; he would never be the same again. So I ran after him. I never knew my brother could run so fast. Behind me I could hear Tahiri calling out my name. It didn't matter now. All that mattered now was making sure Jacen would make it. I always had known how strong their twin bond was. Even when they hadn't realized it themselves. Sometime I had been jealous of their bond, but now I was glad I didn't have one.
Jacen ran out of the great temple, straight for the Jungle. I called out his name several times, but he didn't seem to hear me. I tried to reach him with the Force, but I hit a brick wall. He was completely closed of.
He ran deeper into the jungle. It didn't look like he knew where he was going. He just ran. When I thought I was never going to catch on, I saw him trip over a rock and he fell down. He didn't move, so at fist I thought he was unconscious, but when I reached him got up. To stop him from running away again I grabbed him by his arm. "No," Jacen said and tried to pull away, but held him tight.
"Common Jacen, pull yourself together. Jaina wouldn't want this. She would want you to be strong," I cried to him. Seeing Jacen like this hurt me even more than Jaina dying. I felt hot tears falling down.
Jacen seemed to calm down after that. He fell down crying and I held him close. Jaina was gone and she would never be coming back. I didn't know how long we had been there, when uncle Luke came. He didn't say anything; we just picked Jacen up and helped him back to the academy.
SOMEWHERE IN THE JEDI ACADEMY
I felt her dying and then nothing. She was gone and I never got to tell her. I fell down on the bed I'd just made. She was gone and I didn't tell her.
[hr]
I'll never leave. Not even if you kill me
--David Boreanaz "Angel"
[hr]