Green Eyed Slayer
Chapter Six: Gwen

He got her. Thanks to me, Spike, my Sire, the person I love most got the thing he wanted most. And I need to get gone. I should have left as soon as they got it on. But no, I had to stick around, didn't I? Had to watch them train together. It's downright bloody sickening!

"Spike!" she giggled as he came up behind her and grabbed her arms, pulling them away from the punching bag and hugging them round her waist, his hands covering hers.

I rolled my eyes at the sight of him nuzzling her neck and decided to ask Willow or Xander if they wanted to go to the Bronze, as my Sire was otherwise engaged.

So, I guess it's time for me to do yet another flit and get going. Always knew I wasn't gonna stick around, always knew this was a mission and I had others to be getting on with. And I'm glad, really, that this is finally "mission accomplished," 'cause now it's over and I can go. I don't have to watch Spike moon over her and I don't have to watch him hurt. It's well and truly over. Spike's happy, so I guess I'm happy. Thing is, the only way he was ever gonna be happy was with her, so that's it. I know that. I knew he would only ever be happy with her.

God, I hate her.

She must have been a brainless bimbo, not to have seen how great Spike is to begin with. I'm glad she finally realised but I hate her for getting him. Hey, I'm a complicated kinda gal.

I sigh and lean back in the chair. I've been sitting in the shop for almost an hour waiting for Spike to drag his ass in here. Probably too busy shagging the bloody Slayer.

"Uh, you ok?" Willow asks, looking at me strangely from across the table.

"Yeah," I shrug. "Why'd you ask?"

"'Cause - no offence - but you look kinda… homicidal?"

"Miserable," I correct. "I don't intend to kill you."

"Oh," she grins, "That's good."

"Yeah," I answer unenthusiastically.

The bell jingles and Spike saunters in with his arm firmly around the Slayer. Bitch. Then I look at him and suddenly she's the best thing since sliced bread 'cause she put that gorgeous smile on his face, something Drusilla never did.

"Gwen," he greets, not looking at me, nuzzling her hair. Xander rolls his eyes and the Watcher guy removes his glasses to clean them.

"Hey, Gwen," Buffy giggles, squirming away from him.

"Hi," I answer flatly.

"Ah, Buffy," Giles said, hurrying round the counter now the lovebirds have parted, which basically means they're only glued together down one side. "Ready to train?"

"Yeah," though she don't sound all that chipper about it.

So the Slayer goes off into the back an' Spike stares after her. Then he wanders over to the table and sits down. Past coupla days, I've noticed a decrease in the insults from Xander and an increase in warmth from just about everyone else. Talk about follow the bloody leader!

"Spike," I start. "Can I talk to you?"

"Sure," he shrugs. "Fire away, pet."

I take a deep breath and look round the shop. Willow and Xander are researching some big ick, Anya's counting money and Dawn's doing homework.

"In private?" I hiss and everyone looks over. Fantastic.

He frowns at me, trying to see through me, why I need to talk privately when I've never given a damn before whether I aired my dirty linen in public or not.

"Uh, yeah," he stands up, still frowning. "Hang on a minute," and he gestures to the back room before going off to tell his girlfriend he's going off with me for a bit.

The rest of them, throw glances at each other and me 'til Spike comes back all worried looking.

"Right then," he says. "All yours, love."

Huh. I wish.

Spike doesn't need an explanation, not when my rucksack's on the bed, fully packed.

"You're leaving," he states.

"Yeah," I shrug and pull the bag toward me. "It was just a flying visit, they always are, you know that, Sire."

"I know, I just…" he runs a hand over his hair. "I thought you'd stick around this time. The Scoobs don't seem to mind you and after what you did for me and Buffy… I just thought you might stay."

"And what?" I snort. "Watch you and Miss Sunnydale play Happy Families, not bloody likely."

"I'm sorry."

"For what? Being happy? Don't be, it was all part of the plan."

"Plan?"

"I had to have something to fill my time."

"I'm gonna miss you."

I look away. Not once, not once in the hundred and something years he's known me has he once said he'll miss me or he didn't want me to leave. The closest he came to that was when he told me to go to avoid Angelus.

"Yeah?" I ask. "Sure you won't be too busy not missing Buffy?"

The sneer in my voice cut him, I knew it.

"Sorry," I muttered.

"It's all right," he shrugs and takes my shoulders like he did years ago. "Who knows? Another time, another place…"

"Another Slayer?"

"Yeah. Look after yourself?"

"I always do. Didn't live this long by dancing with the sunbeams."

"I meant make sure you're happy."

"I'll give it a go."

"Any idea where you're gonna go?"

I shrug, really hadn't thought about it.

"Angelus?" I suggest. "Now I come to think about it, that could be fun. Visit him just to annoy the hell outta him."

He laughs, "Girl after my own heart."

"You didn't realise before now?" I ask and hate myself for how tiny my voice is.

He looks at me sadly and pulls me into a sudden and tight hug.

"Despite what you think," he starts when we pull apart. "I actually do soddin' love you."

The words are like Heaven. Pure Heaven. But they don't have the same depth when he says them to Buffy. But part of me doesn't give a damn, part of me just wants to accept I've got as much as I'll ever get. Part of me - as always - wants more, but it knows I won't find it here. Not in his arms, the arms of my Sire, not in the heart of the man I love. Not then and not now. And maybe I can move on now, the acceptance can help me move on. Ah, well, you never know what's around the corner. I certainly didn't when I rounded a particular corner in Virginia…

"Thanks," I answer. "Love you too, that much was always obvious."

"See ya."

"Aye."

I pick up my bag, kiss his cheek, climb the ladder and walk out. The picking up of my bag wasn't hard, the kiss wasn't hard, the climbing of the ladder wasn't hard.

The walking away, now that was hard.

I adjust the bag on my back and jam me helmet on before swinging a leg over my Harley, mounting and revving her up. He didn't come after me when I left, didn't walk me to my bike. I heard him leave as I reached my Harley and walk slowly in the other direction. I ignored it then and I'm not thinking about it now.

I drive round the cemetery perimeter to meet me boss. He's leaning casually against a tree; wearing the usual gaudy clothes that my ma would've said would shame a whore. But he's all right; I quite like the guy. I've known worse. I dismount, kick out the stand an' remove me helmet, placing it on the seat of me bike. I walk over to him and smile as I lean beside him against the tree trunk.

"Hey, kid."

"Hello, Whistler."